Chapter 6 Act 4 The Trial of Madison

The scene is the same as Act 1. God Lee: (Stands up, knocks the gavel) Now announce the opening of the 4th court of the "Last Judgment" (sit down).Biography accused the 4th President of the United States James Madison (James Madison). (Madison stands.) God Lee: You are Madison.You were born in 1751, and your little Jefferson was 8 years old. You are the 4th president of the United States and the most "mini" president in the history of the United States. You are 163 in height and only 45 kg. You suffer from epileptoid hysteria. You've been called "monkey on a leash," "Jefferson's crown prince," haven't you?

Madison: (soft voice) Yes. God Li: You have a very good temper, which was tested at the beginning. Madison: At the beginning, I also learned that God Li Duo understands me. God Lee: I know you, not only when you died in 1886 at the age of 85, the last of the Founding Fathers and the last delegate to the Continental Congress, when you were 29 years old, the youngest and last signer of the Constitution , The last colonel during the revolution, although you have never fought.I also know that you made a big deal after your death. You got thirty thousand dollars from the government to buy your journal from the Constitutional Convention.

Madison: That's a historical document. God Lee: The one you coded with your fiancée, Kitty Floyd, too. Madison: That's coded. God Lee: But a century after your death, it was deciphered by Irving Brant. Madison: Well, the truth of the world will always come out. God Lee: You are the first president to ask Congress to declare war after the founding of the United States. The war against Britain in 1812 was known as "Mr. Madison's War". Madison: That's a shame.In fact, it was only because of a group of militant hawks (War Hawks faction), especially the speaker of the House of Representatives Henry Clay (Henry Clay), who fought the most vigorously and dragged the country into the war.Not only did Canada fail to win, Detroit, an important northern city, was lost, and all ports were blocked. What's more embarrassing is that on August 24-25, 1814, the British army marched in, occupied Washington, and set fire to the Capitol Hill and the presidential residence. If it weren't for a storm The British army was forced to retreat and the fire was extinguished immediately, and the entire public building and some private houses were bound to be reduced to ashes.Britain was trapped in the European war. The Treaty of Ghent (Treaty of Ghent) was signed on Christmas Eve in 1814. The two sides had nothing to gain and nothing to lose.

God Lee: You should teach the United States a lesson, don't start a war lightly. Madison: The American hawks are belligerent, and they cannot be held back. God Lee: You set a bad example.Not only could it not hold back the hawks in the United States, but it also lost the capital once. Madison: I heard that Chiang Kai-shek of China lost the capital twice? God Lee: Chiang Kai-shek is Chinese, right?The President of the United States has adopted a policy of "leash on Chiang" towards him, treating him like a dog.Sorry, the word monkey on a leash also appeared in the project you were scolded.One thing must be said is that your first lady is very good at fleeing. Before the British attacked the White House, your wife bravely stayed there. Amidst the sound of gunfire, she did not forget to take away the national treasure.She wrote to her sister: "I am still under the roar of the cannon, Mr. Madison has not come yet, God bless him! Two travel-stained messengers came and urged me to flee here, but I want Wait for him...a carriage is ready, and I have loaded it with the gold and silver tableware from the White House and the most valuable and easily portable things...I must stick to the end! Put the huge portrait of General Washington Protect it, first remove the painting from the wall.” From this recollection, you, Mrs. Dolley Payne Todd, are remarkable for your unflappable presence.Compared with the later 16th wife of President Lincoln, another Todd (Todd), she was much more punctual.Lincoln said that God (GOD) has only one d, but his wife has two d's, and it is indeed extraordinary to have two d's.

Madison: God knows my wife is Mr. Todd's widow. God Lee: Starting from Washington, it is the tradition of American presidents to ask rich widows to be their wives. Madison: (with a wry smile) God Lee has rich knowledge of American history, but there is always a hint of irony. God Lee: Maybe I have a better sense of humor than Americans. Madison: What is the American sense of humor in the eyes of God Lee? God Lee: Americans have the best sense of humor. Everything should be humorous first, including murder.The German Gestapo came out to kill people after listening to Wagner. The United States is not so elegant.As soon as the joke is told, the shoulder is tapped, the chewing gum is chewed, the toothpick is twisted and turned, and then the gun is fired. Cowboys don't need Wagner, fuck Wagner!

Madison: How I wish God Lee was American. God Lee: (laughs) Just kidding, in addition to not being your vice president, you can also consider being an American and anti-American. Madison: There's something in God Lee's words.Know that my vice presidents are all dead in office.During my first term, George Clinton died in office on April 20, 1812, and I have had no vice president since March 3, 1813; my second term, Vice President Elbridge Gary Gerry died in office on November 23, 1814, and there was no Vice President between then and March 3, 1817. God Lee: Gerry, Gerry, I think of when Gerry was the governor, he formed a clique for personal gain and unfairly divided the electoral districts. The Essex county constituency was divided like a salamander (salamander), so the wonderful word gerrymander came out, your vice president. , This is how to engage in American democracy!

Madison: Our American democracy was in a hurry at the beginning, friends and enemies separated, and they came and went.Like the establishment of the National Bank, I was against Hamilton, and 20 years later, I also established it. God Lee: Hamilton died in a duel at the age of 49. You were born in 1751 and he was born in 1755. They are about the same age, but you died later and lived 36 years longer than him.You are so blessed that you should do more, but you are rated as the first among "average presidents".It's a bit lacklustre, like there's nothing wrong with it. Madison: So it's hard for God Lee to judge me.

God Lee: The so-called trial includes discussing, understanding, and slicing you as the "American model" of your era. For example, your attitude towards black slaves is a good slice.I know, you have ten thousand acres of land, you are a big landowner, and you have 100 slaves, you are a big slaveholder. MADISON: Then God Lee should know I've always thought slavery was a moral crime and a curse on the state of Virginia.I am for the abolition of slavery, but I don't believe that whites and blacks can coexist peacefully, so ah, I am for freeing all slaves and sending them back to Africa.In 1819, two years after my presidency, I helped organize the American Colonization Society. Three years later, Liberia was created in West Africa as the home state of former American slaves.

God Lee: This is the morality of you Americans!They were forced to be shipped from Africa, and then packaged and sent away from the United States.Just as you did when you sold your body slave before leaving Philadelphia, 1783, you wrote to Papa (taking out a piece of paper): "I won't take him back to Virginia... I believe he His mind has been polluted by the environment, and he can no longer live with our other slaves in Virginia...I don't expect to sell him for what he is actually worth, but I can't punish him with banishment just because he desires to be free He, this is the very liberty we have paid so much for in blood, and which we have so often declared every man should aspire to and be entitled to." See, President Madison, this is my "Last Judgment ", you clearly want to deport black slaves to Liberia by means of deportation, and you will never show mercy to a black slave who takes care of you personally.I'm so curious, Madison, the same you who drafted ten constitutional amendments to the Bill of Rights (Bill of Rights) while ignoring the human rights of black people at the same time, don't you feel that your personality is splitting?

Madison: (embarrassed) We should understand our difficulties. God Li: What do you understand?Forgiveness is premised, and moral issues cannot be turned a blind eye.You American Founding Fathers have too many moral problems.What was the America that the Founding Fathers launched?It is to do everything possible to earn your property, and then do everything possible to protect my property.The so-called founding fathers, at least 14 of them were land speculators. Among them, Jefferson, your good friend, inherited more than 2,700 acres of land and a large number of serfs when he was 14 years old. When he grew up, he owned 10,000 acres of land and 100 to 200 slaves.The reason why he was able to write his great book on human freedom is because of the labor of three generations of serfs.This good-looking hypocrite is full of benevolence and morality, full of benevolence and morality, but he is full of contradictions.He kept advocating human rights and human rights, but when the black slaves at home escaped, they were arrested in the newspapers. Maybe you said that black people were not human beings in the eyes of the decent gentlemen at the time, so why did Jefferson sleep with the black female slaves at home?What is this, bestiality?What's more intriguing is that they gave birth to offspring of black and white mulattos, which is still to this day.

Madison: (confused) Bestiality? God Lee: Isn't it?Your treatment of Negroes reminds me of the theme of the book "The Negro a Beast" in which Negroes are beasts but made into two-handed talking slaves.In fact, black people are not the descendants of (Ham), nor does the Bible prove that it is.According to this "Negro is the Beast", sleeping with a black woman is not bestiality, so what is it? Madison: When you died in 1836 at the age of 85, you were the last dead American founding father, the last dead delegate to the Continental Congress (the youngest at the time), the last dead signer of the Constitution Man (formerly known as the "Father of the Constitution").You are full of symbols.Well, Madison, next court, I'm going to ask Monroe, who was your Secretary of State and Secretary of War.Retire from the court (beat the mallet and stand up). (The curtain falls.)