Chapter 25 25. Surgery

Zemstvo Hospital.Since the doctor went home to get married, the patient was temporarily received by the doctor Kuriatin.He was a fat man of about forty years old, wearing a very old tussah silk single-breasted jacket and a pair of worn tweed trousers.A responsible, happy expression on his face.Between the index and middle fingers of his left hand was a stinking cigar. The chanter, Migrasov, entered the clinic. He was a tall, solid old man in a brown robe with a narrow waist and wide sleeves, and a wide belt around the waist.His right eye was cataracted and half-closed, and he had a wart on his nose that looked like a very large fly from a distance.The chanter quickly searched for the icon with his eyes, and when he failed to find it, he made the sign of the sign of the sign of the sign of the sign of the sign of the cross over a carbolic solution.Then he took a wafer from the red cloth and, bowing, placed it before the physician.

"Ah...thank you!" the doctor yawned, "what's your job?" "Have a good Sunday, Sergey Kuzmich...I have one thing to ask of you... I'm sorry, but it's true in the hymn: 'I drink with my tears.'" I sat down to tea with the old woman the other day—oh, my God! I couldn't drink a drop, I just wanted to lie down, and I'd rather be dead.... Just took that little sip— ——It hurts so much that I have no strength at all! Except for the toothache, the whole half of my face... It hurts, it hurts! This ear also suddenly hurts, no, it’s like there is a nail in it, or something else What: pains, pains! Sins! Violations! . . . Shameful sin obsesses the heart, leads to idleness. . . . Retribution, Sergey Kuzmich, retribution! High Priest The priest scolded me after mass: "You, Yefim, have a lisp and a nasal voice. When you sing, you can't hear what you sing at all." Please judge: If you open your mouth Let's go, what poetry can I sing! My face is swollen, I can't do it, I can't sleep at night..."

"Oh yes... sit down please... open your mouth!" Von Migrasov sat down and opened his mouth. Kuriatin frowned, looked into his mouth, and saw a carious tooth among a row of teeth yellowed with age and smoke. "The deacon wants me to put on hot pepper wine - it doesn't work. Gliclia Anisimovna - please God bless her old man - give me a sprig from Mount Athos Thin thread, let me tie it in my arm, and told me to wash my mouth with milk. And I, to tell the truth, the thread was tied, and as for the milk, I didn't do it: I fear God, and it's fasting time..." "Superstition! . . . " the doctor continued after a short pause: "The tooth must be pulled out, Efim Mikheitch!"

"You know better than I do, Sergey Kuzmich. You went to school, so you know how to do things like this: pull it out, or put some medicine, or something else... ...That's why we put you here, benefactor, God bless you with good health, so that we may pray for you, dear father, day and night...until you lie in your grave..." "It's not worth mentioning..." The doctor became humble. He walked to the cabinet and began to search for tooth extraction equipment, "Surgery—it's not worth mentioning...it all depends on proficiency and strong hands...it's effortless... Not long ago, the landowner Alexander Ivanich Yegipetsky came to the hospital, just like you now... also has a toothache... This man is very knowledgeable, asks questions about everything, and finds out: what's going on , why. He shook my hand, called me by my first name and my father's name...he lived in Petersburg for seven years and knew all the professors...I stayed with him for a long time...in the name of Jesus God Begged me: 'You pulled it out, Sergey Kuzmich!' What's wrong with that? You can pull it out. But here you need to know something, and you can't do it if you don't know it... There are all kinds of teeth. There are Some use clamps to pull out, some use special dental pliers, and some use screw pliers... It depends on the individual."

The doctor picked up the special dental pliers, looked at it suspiciously for a minute, then put it down and picked up a pair of pliers. "Okay, sir, open your mouth wider..." he said, walking up to the chanter with the pliers, "I'm going to put it... that... it's easy... just prick the gums... Pull out along the vertical axis... This becomes..." He pierced his gums, "This becomes..." "You are our savior... We fools don't understand anything, it is God who opened your brains..." "Since your mouth is open, don't make any comments... This tooth is easy to pull out, but the root often fails to come out... This one--without any effort..." He put the tongs on, "Wait a minute, don't pull...sit still, don't move...in the blink of an eye...(pull hard)...the key is to pull it deep (pull hard)...don't break the root of the tooth... "

"Our Father... Our Lady... Ouch..." "It's not right... It's not right... How to pull it out? Don't grab it with your hands! Put your hand down!" He pulled it out vigorously, "It will be fine soon... Soon, soon... Things, you know, it's not easy... " "Heavenly Father... Father and Mother..." He screamed, "Angel! Ouch... You pull it out, pull it out, why did you drag it out for five years?" "This matter, you know... it's a surgical operation... it can't be done all at once... soon, soon..." When Vonmigrasov raised his knees to his arms in pain, he scratched and moved his ten fingers, his eyes widened, and he was out of breath... Sweat broke out on his purple face, and his eyes glistened. Tears, Kuriatin stood panting from exhaustion in front of the chanting, stamped his feet, pulled out... The most torturous half minute passed - the pliers that held the teeth fell off.The chanter jumped up and stuck his fingers in his mouth.He felt the carious tooth in his mouth was still in the same place.

"Look at you pulling it!" He said in a dumbfounding tone, "I'll drag you to the underworld! Thank you so much! If you don't have the ability, don't pull your teeth! The pain is so painful that my eyes are black..." "Then why did you grab me?" The doctor was also angry, "I'm pulling out my tooth, and you keep touching my hand and saying countless stupid things...you bastard!" "You're an asshole!" "You think, country bumpkin, teeth are easy to pull out? Try it! It's nothing like climbing a bell tower to strike a bell! (teasing him) 'No way, no way!' You say, how can you teach someone a lesson? You really are... I pulled out the teeth of Master Yegipetsky, that is, Alexander Ivanitch, and he did nothing, didn't say a word... He is nobler than you, and he doesn't use his hands Scratching... sit down! I tell you: sit down!"

"I'm dizzy from the pain... You let me breathe... Ouch!" He sat down and said, "Just don't take too long, just pull it hard. Don't pull it, pull it hard... Pull it out all at once! " "He's enlightening an expert! My God, such an ignorant brute! Living with such a person... You're going to go crazy! Open your mouth!" He put the clamps in. "Surgery, man , this is not a joke...it's nothing like singing in a choir..." He tugged hard, "Don't tremble... It seems that this tooth is old and has a deep root..." He tugged vigorously, " Don't move... that's right, that's right... don't move... okay, okay..." There was a broken voice, "I knew this would happen!"

For a moment Vonmigrasov sat stunned, seemingly unconscious.He was unconscious... His eyes were blankly staring into space, and his pale face was covered with sweat. "I wish I could use special pliers..." the doctor muttered, "I didn't expect that!" The chanter came to his senses and immediately put his fingers in his mouth. There were two sharp stubbles in the place of the diseased tooth. "Evil, evil spirits!..." He yelled, "You Herods are killing us for letting you stay here!" "You curse again..." muttered the doctor, putting the tongs back in the cupboard, "ignorant bastard...you got less whipped in the seminary...Master Yegipetsky, that is, Alexander Ivan Nech, he lived in Petersburg for seven years... what a scholar... a coat of his is worth a hundred rubles... and he doesn't curse... what's so great about you? Never mind, you won't die!"

The chanter picked up the wafer from the table, covered his cheek for a year, and had to go home...

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