Chapter 17 Chapter Seventeen
Catherine was in a state of overwhelmed mental state.She was in this hotel room, sitting on a couch, listening to Lieutenant Hans Bergman, captain of the ski patrol, report to her about Kirk's death.Bergman's voice passed Catherine's ears one after another high and low, but she didn't listen to these words.The dreadful thing that had happened had numbed her.Everyone around me is dead, she thought desperately.Larry was dead, and now Kirk was dead too.There were others: Noel, Napoleon Chotas, Frederick Stavros.It's an endless nightmare.
She was immersed in a state of despair and bewilderment.Therefore, she only vaguely heard a few words of Bergman. "Mrs. Reynolds... Mrs. Reynolds."
She looked up. "I'm not Mrs. Reynolds," she said impatiently. "I'm Catherine Alexander. Kirk and I are just...just friends."
"I see."
Catherine took a deep breath and said, "How...how did this happen? Kirk is a pretty good skier."
"I know, he has skied here many times." He shook his head. "To tell you the truth, Miss Alexander, even I am baffled by what has happened. We found his body on this slope in Lagard. It's closed. The sign must have blown the cape off. I'm very sorry about that."
Regret, what an easy word, what an insensitive word.
"How would you like us to arrange the funeral, Miss Alexander?"
It seems that death is not the end.No, there were other arrangements to be made; the coffin and burial place, and the flowers and the relatives who had to be notified, and so on, a whole lot of things to do.Catherine was on the verge of screaming.
"Miss Alexander?"
Catherine looked up and said, "I'll notify Kirk's family."
"Thank you."
The journey back to London was full of sorrow.She had hoped fervently to come to St. Mauls with Kirk, thinking that this might be the opening door to a new life. Kirk had been so gentle and patient with her.I should have made love to him, Catherine thought.But in the end, does it really matter?What does it matter?It was as if I were cursed, and everyone who came near me was ruined.
When Catherine returned to London, she was so depressed that she was unable to go back to work.She stayed in the suite, closed the door to thank guests, refused to see anyone, did not talk to anyone.The landlord Anna prepared meals for her and sent them to her room, but the plates were always returned intact. "You've got to have something to eat, Team Alexander." But the thought of food made Catherine sick.
The next day, Catherine felt even worse. Her chest seemed to be filled with steel, and it was difficult to breathe. I can't go on like this forever.Catherine thought.I have to do something about it. She discussed the matter with Evelyn Kaye. "I've been blaming myself for what happened." "That doesn't make sense, Catherine." "I know it doesn't make sense. But I can't help it. I feel responsible for these things. I need to talk to someone about this, and maybe, if I go see a psychiatrist, it will..." "I know a very good doctor," Evelyn said. "Wim is actually treated by him a lot. His name is Alan Hamilton. I once had a friend who tried to kill himself, and passed Hamilton. After being treated thoroughly by the doctor, she is in great condition, would you like to go to see him?" What should I do if he tells me I'm crazy?If I'm really crazy, that's bad.Catherine grudgingly replied, "All right." "I'll make an appointment with him for you. He's a busy man." "Thanks, Evelyn. Thank you so much for your help." Catherine walked into Wim's office.Maybe he'd like to know something about Kirk, she thought. "Wim, do you remember Kirk Reynolds? He died in a skiing accident a few days ago." "Really? Westminster-0-4-7-1." Catherine blinked. "What?" Suddenly, she realized that Wem was reciting Kirk's phone number.Is that all men, in Kem's view?Is it just a string of phone numbers?Does he have no feelings for them?Does he really no longer love, hate, or feel compassion for people? Maybe he's better than me.Catherine thought.At least he was spared the terrible pain that those of us feel.
Evelyn made an appointment with Dr. Hamilton for Catherine, and finally, arranged to meet next Friday.She remembered that she should call Constantine Demiris and tell him what she had done, but she thought it was too small and trivial and decided not to bother him.
Alan Hamilton's office is on Wimpole Street.Catherine went there apprehensive and angry to fulfill her first appointment.She was apprehensive because she feared what dire conclusions the doctor might draw about her.She was angry with herself because she felt that these problems should have been solved by herself, and now she was relying on the help of a stranger. The receptionist behind the glass window said, "Dr. Hamilton is ready and waiting for you, Miss Alexander." But am I ready to wait for him too?Catherine murmured.She suddenly felt very panicked.what am i doing hereI don't want to entrust myself to self-important quacks. "I've changed my mind. I don't really need to see a doctor. I'm paying for this appointment," Catherine said. "Eh? Please wait a moment." "But……" The receptionist had disappeared into the doctor's office. After a while, the door of the doctor's office opened.Since Dr. Alan Hamilton was gone.He is about forty years old, tall, fair skin, flaxen hair, and a pair of bright blue eyes, with a very easy-going attitude. He looked at Catherine and said with a smile, "You've made me very happy today." Catherine frowned and said, "What..." "You don't know what a good doctor you are. It must be a record thing that you just walked into my reception room today feeling better." Catherine said, "Sorry, I was wrong, I don't need help." "I'm glad to hear that," said Alan Hamilton. "I hope all my patients feel that way. Now that you're here, Miss Alexander, why don't you come in for a while? We can have a cup of coffee." .” "Thank you, no need, I don't..." "I promise you'll feel better after your coffee." Catherine hesitated and said, "Well, just stay for a while." She followed him into the office.This is a very simple office, quietly and tastefully decorated.It's furnished in a way that looks more like a living room than an office, with paintings on the walls that lend a sense of calm and relief, a photo on the coffee table, The picture shows a beautiful woman and a child.Oh, it looks like he has a nice office and a charming family.What does that indicate? "Sit down, please," said Dr. Hamilton. "Coffee will be good after a while..." "I shouldn't be wasting your time, doctor. I'm..." "Don't worry about it." He sat down in an easy chair and looked her over. "You have suffered a lot," he said sympathetically. "What do you know about it?" said Catherine hastily.Her tone of voice was unexpected and domineering. "I spoke to Evelyn. She told me what happened in St. Moritz. I feel very sad." It's that damn word again. "Are you sad? Since you are such an amazing doctor, maybe you can bring Kirk back from the dead too." All the pain that was suppressed in her heart burst out like a flood, and to her own horror, she Sobbed hysterically. "Leave me alone," she screamed, "Leave me alone!" Alan Hamilton sat there watching her, saying nothing. When Catherine's sobbing finally died down, she said wearily, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I really have to go now." She stood up and walked to the door. "Miss Alexander, I don't know if I can help you, but I'd love to try. All I can assure you is that nothing I've done will hurt you." Catherine stood by the door, hesitating.She turned and looked at him.Eyes filled with tears. "I don't understand what's wrong with me," she whispered. "I feel a strong sense of loss." Alan Hamilton got up and came over to her. "So why don't we try to get you back? We can work together on this. Sit down, please. I'm going to take care of the coffee." He went for five minutes.Catherine sat there wondering how he had managed to persuade her to stay.He has a quieting charm.There seemed to be something calming about his manner. Maybe he can help me, Catherine thought. Alan Hamilton returned to his office with two cups of coffee. "Here is butter and sugar, please take it yourself." "No, thank you." He sat down across from her. "I understand that your friend died in a skiing accident." It pained her to mention it. "Yes, he fell to his death on a ski slope that was supposed to be closed. The wind blew the closed sign away." "Is this the first time you've seen someone close to you die?" How should she answer this question?Ho!No, my husband and his mistress were executed for murdering me.Everyone around me is dead.These words would shock him.He sat there, waiting for her answer.This pretentious son of a bitch.Well, she didn't satisfy him, her own life had nothing to do with him.I hate him. Alan Hamilton saw the anger on her face and deliberately changed the subject. "How's Wem?" he asked. The question completely disarmed Catherine. "Wim? He—he's fine. Evelyn told me he was your patient." "yes." "Can you explain to me how—why—he became what he is?" "Wim came to me because he had been unemployed. He was a rare character - a natural cynic. I can't explain why, but basically he hated the people around him and couldn't relate to them. Get on good terms." Catherine remembered Evelyn's words, he is a person without feelings, and he would never want to be in contact with anyone. "But Wim had a remarkable talent for mathematics," continued Alan Hamilton. "Now he's doing a job that plays to his strengths." Catherine nodded. "I've never met anyone like him." Alan Hamilton leaned forward in his chair and said, "Miss Alexander, what you've been through has been very painful, but I may be able to relieve it a bit. I'll try." "I... I don't know," Catherine said. "It looks hopeless." "If you think like that, there's no way out but screw up, don't you think?" Alan Hamilton said with a smile that was contagious. "Why don't we book another outpatient appointment? If you still hate me at the end of the day, we can stop now." "I don't hate you," Catherine said apologetically. "Well, maybe just a little bit." Alan Hamilton went to his desk and checked the calendar.His schedule is already packed. "How about Monday?" he asked. "How about one?" One was his lunchtime, but he was willing to give it up.Catherine Alexander is a woman about to be weighed down by a heavy mental baggage.He had made up his mind to do everything in his power to help her. Catherine looked at him for a long time before saying, "All right." "Excellent. I'll see you then." He handed her a business card. "During this time, if you need me, here's my office number and my home number, and I'm not usually a deep sleeper, so you don't have to worry about waking me up." "Thank you," Catherine said. "I'll come on Monday." Dr. Alan Hamilton watched her walk out the door and thought, She's so delicate, so beautiful, I have to be careful.He looked at the photo on the coffee table.I wonder what Angela would think?
The phone call came in the middle of the night. Constantin Demiris answered the phone.When he spoke, there was a tone of surprise in his voice. "What? The Seri sank? I can't believe it." "That's absolutely true, Mr. Demiris. The Coast Guard found some fragments of the wreck." "Are there any survivors?" "No, sir. I'm afraid there will be no survivors. The whole crew is lost." "It's horrible. Does anyone know how this happened?" "I don't think we'll ever know, sir. All evidence is at the bottom of the sea." "The sea," murmured Demiris, "the cruel sea." "Should we go and file a claim with the insurance company?" "It's embarrassing that we should have to worry about it when all those brave sailors have lost their lives!—but, yes, a claim should be made." As for the amphora, he will have it in his private collection. Now it was time to punish his brother-in-law.
The journey back to London was full of sorrow.She had hoped fervently to come to St. Mauls with Kirk, thinking that this might be the opening door to a new life. Kirk had been so gentle and patient with her.I should have made love to him, Catherine thought.But in the end, does it really matter?What does it matter?It was as if I were cursed, and everyone who came near me was ruined.
When Catherine returned to London, she was so depressed that she was unable to go back to work.She stayed in the suite, closed the door to thank guests, refused to see anyone, did not talk to anyone.The landlord Anna prepared meals for her and sent them to her room, but the plates were always returned intact. "You've got to have something to eat, Team Alexander." But the thought of food made Catherine sick.
The next day, Catherine felt even worse. Her chest seemed to be filled with steel, and it was difficult to breathe. I can't go on like this forever.Catherine thought.I have to do something about it. She discussed the matter with Evelyn Kaye. "I've been blaming myself for what happened." "That doesn't make sense, Catherine." "I know it doesn't make sense. But I can't help it. I feel responsible for these things. I need to talk to someone about this, and maybe, if I go see a psychiatrist, it will..." "I know a very good doctor," Evelyn said. "Wim is actually treated by him a lot. His name is Alan Hamilton. I once had a friend who tried to kill himself, and passed Hamilton. After being treated thoroughly by the doctor, she is in great condition, would you like to go to see him?" What should I do if he tells me I'm crazy?If I'm really crazy, that's bad.Catherine grudgingly replied, "All right." "I'll make an appointment with him for you. He's a busy man." "Thanks, Evelyn. Thank you so much for your help." Catherine walked into Wim's office.Maybe he'd like to know something about Kirk, she thought. "Wim, do you remember Kirk Reynolds? He died in a skiing accident a few days ago." "Really? Westminster-0-4-7-1." Catherine blinked. "What?" Suddenly, she realized that Wem was reciting Kirk's phone number.Is that all men, in Kem's view?Is it just a string of phone numbers?Does he have no feelings for them?Does he really no longer love, hate, or feel compassion for people? Maybe he's better than me.Catherine thought.At least he was spared the terrible pain that those of us feel.
Evelyn made an appointment with Dr. Hamilton for Catherine, and finally, arranged to meet next Friday.She remembered that she should call Constantine Demiris and tell him what she had done, but she thought it was too small and trivial and decided not to bother him.
Alan Hamilton's office is on Wimpole Street.Catherine went there apprehensive and angry to fulfill her first appointment.She was apprehensive because she feared what dire conclusions the doctor might draw about her.She was angry with herself because she felt that these problems should have been solved by herself, and now she was relying on the help of a stranger. The receptionist behind the glass window said, "Dr. Hamilton is ready and waiting for you, Miss Alexander." But am I ready to wait for him too?Catherine murmured.She suddenly felt very panicked.what am i doing hereI don't want to entrust myself to self-important quacks. "I've changed my mind. I don't really need to see a doctor. I'm paying for this appointment," Catherine said. "Eh? Please wait a moment." "But……" The receptionist had disappeared into the doctor's office. After a while, the door of the doctor's office opened.Since Dr. Alan Hamilton was gone.He is about forty years old, tall, fair skin, flaxen hair, and a pair of bright blue eyes, with a very easy-going attitude. He looked at Catherine and said with a smile, "You've made me very happy today." Catherine frowned and said, "What..." "You don't know what a good doctor you are. It must be a record thing that you just walked into my reception room today feeling better." Catherine said, "Sorry, I was wrong, I don't need help." "I'm glad to hear that," said Alan Hamilton. "I hope all my patients feel that way. Now that you're here, Miss Alexander, why don't you come in for a while? We can have a cup of coffee." .” "Thank you, no need, I don't..." "I promise you'll feel better after your coffee." Catherine hesitated and said, "Well, just stay for a while." She followed him into the office.This is a very simple office, quietly and tastefully decorated.It's furnished in a way that looks more like a living room than an office, with paintings on the walls that lend a sense of calm and relief, a photo on the coffee table, The picture shows a beautiful woman and a child.Oh, it looks like he has a nice office and a charming family.What does that indicate? "Sit down, please," said Dr. Hamilton. "Coffee will be good after a while..." "I shouldn't be wasting your time, doctor. I'm..." "Don't worry about it." He sat down in an easy chair and looked her over. "You have suffered a lot," he said sympathetically. "What do you know about it?" said Catherine hastily.Her tone of voice was unexpected and domineering. "I spoke to Evelyn. She told me what happened in St. Moritz. I feel very sad." It's that damn word again. "Are you sad? Since you are such an amazing doctor, maybe you can bring Kirk back from the dead too." All the pain that was suppressed in her heart burst out like a flood, and to her own horror, she Sobbed hysterically. "Leave me alone," she screamed, "Leave me alone!" Alan Hamilton sat there watching her, saying nothing. When Catherine's sobbing finally died down, she said wearily, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I really have to go now." She stood up and walked to the door. "Miss Alexander, I don't know if I can help you, but I'd love to try. All I can assure you is that nothing I've done will hurt you." Catherine stood by the door, hesitating.She turned and looked at him.Eyes filled with tears. "I don't understand what's wrong with me," she whispered. "I feel a strong sense of loss." Alan Hamilton got up and came over to her. "So why don't we try to get you back? We can work together on this. Sit down, please. I'm going to take care of the coffee." He went for five minutes.Catherine sat there wondering how he had managed to persuade her to stay.He has a quieting charm.There seemed to be something calming about his manner. Maybe he can help me, Catherine thought. Alan Hamilton returned to his office with two cups of coffee. "Here is butter and sugar, please take it yourself." "No, thank you." He sat down across from her. "I understand that your friend died in a skiing accident." It pained her to mention it. "Yes, he fell to his death on a ski slope that was supposed to be closed. The wind blew the closed sign away." "Is this the first time you've seen someone close to you die?" How should she answer this question?Ho!No, my husband and his mistress were executed for murdering me.Everyone around me is dead.These words would shock him.He sat there, waiting for her answer.This pretentious son of a bitch.Well, she didn't satisfy him, her own life had nothing to do with him.I hate him. Alan Hamilton saw the anger on her face and deliberately changed the subject. "How's Wem?" he asked. The question completely disarmed Catherine. "Wim? He—he's fine. Evelyn told me he was your patient." "yes." "Can you explain to me how—why—he became what he is?" "Wim came to me because he had been unemployed. He was a rare character - a natural cynic. I can't explain why, but basically he hated the people around him and couldn't relate to them. Get on good terms." Catherine remembered Evelyn's words, he is a person without feelings, and he would never want to be in contact with anyone. "But Wim had a remarkable talent for mathematics," continued Alan Hamilton. "Now he's doing a job that plays to his strengths." Catherine nodded. "I've never met anyone like him." Alan Hamilton leaned forward in his chair and said, "Miss Alexander, what you've been through has been very painful, but I may be able to relieve it a bit. I'll try." "I... I don't know," Catherine said. "It looks hopeless." "If you think like that, there's no way out but screw up, don't you think?" Alan Hamilton said with a smile that was contagious. "Why don't we book another outpatient appointment? If you still hate me at the end of the day, we can stop now." "I don't hate you," Catherine said apologetically. "Well, maybe just a little bit." Alan Hamilton went to his desk and checked the calendar.His schedule is already packed. "How about Monday?" he asked. "How about one?" One was his lunchtime, but he was willing to give it up.Catherine Alexander is a woman about to be weighed down by a heavy mental baggage.He had made up his mind to do everything in his power to help her. Catherine looked at him for a long time before saying, "All right." "Excellent. I'll see you then." He handed her a business card. "During this time, if you need me, here's my office number and my home number, and I'm not usually a deep sleeper, so you don't have to worry about waking me up." "Thank you," Catherine said. "I'll come on Monday." Dr. Alan Hamilton watched her walk out the door and thought, She's so delicate, so beautiful, I have to be careful.He looked at the photo on the coffee table.I wonder what Angela would think?
The phone call came in the middle of the night. Constantin Demiris answered the phone.When he spoke, there was a tone of surprise in his voice. "What? The Seri sank? I can't believe it." "That's absolutely true, Mr. Demiris. The Coast Guard found some fragments of the wreck." "Are there any survivors?" "No, sir. I'm afraid there will be no survivors. The whole crew is lost." "It's horrible. Does anyone know how this happened?" "I don't think we'll ever know, sir. All evidence is at the bottom of the sea." "The sea," murmured Demiris, "the cruel sea." "Should we go and file a claim with the insurance company?" "It's embarrassing that we should have to worry about it when all those brave sailors have lost their lives!—but, yes, a claim should be made." As for the amphora, he will have it in his private collection. Now it was time to punish his brother-in-law.