Chapter 43 Section five

Beth stared at him for what seemed like a long, long time. Decker thought, "I really screwed up this time. Why can't I keep my mouth shut?" Beth's eyes were intent. "I guess I said it at the wrong time," Decker said.Beth didn't answer. "Can we go back again?" Decker asked. "Just pretend it never happened, okay?" "You can never go back." "That's exactly what worries me." "And it's already happened." "Yes, it has happened." "You'll regret it," Beth said. "You want me out of here?"

"God, no. I want you to kiss me." By the time Decker realized it, his arms were wrapping around her, and Beth's hands were on the back of his neck.He couldn't help shaking.When they kissed, he seemed to be breathless, he had never experienced such a soul-stirring collision.They kissed long and deeply.Decker began to shake, unable to control his body's response.He has risked his life countless times as a member of the Special Forces and an intelligence agent, and he has also experienced the most chilling fears.The emotion he was experiencing now had all the superficial symptoms of fear, but its substance was quite different.This is crazy joy.His fingertips were numb, and his heart was pounding with the rise and fall of his chest.He unbuttoned her shirt, knelt down, and kissed the smooth skin of her belly.She trembled and fell down, bringing him to the floor as well.They hugged, rolled and kissed deeply.He seemed to feel himself floating, out of his physical body.At the same time, he only has his own body and Beth's body in his consciousness.He wanted to just kiss her and touch her, over and over, forever.

Decker opened his eyes, staring at the trusses and rafters of the flat ceiling.Sunset casts crimson beams through the windows.Beth lay quietly beside him.In fact, she hadn't said a word for several minutes.But the silence was too long, and Decker lost his composure.He worried that she was in the midst of painful reflections of remorse, guilt for having been unfaithful to her dead husband.With a slow movement, she turned to him and stroked his cheek. It seemed all was well, he thought. Beth sat up and glanced at the brick floor she was sitting on.They were in the same room where she kept her paintings, surrounded by brilliant colors. "Passion is wonderful, but sometimes it comes at a price." She chuckled softly. "Just the bricks, I'm pretty sure my back got scraped by them."

"My knees and arms were scrubbed off as well," Decker said. "Let me see. Whoops," Beth said, "if we get any more crazy, we'll have to go to the emergency room." Decker laughed, uncontrollably.He laughed endlessly until the tears flowed down his face. Beth smiled too, with genuine joy.She leaned toward him and kissed him again, but this time with tenderness and admiration.She stroked his strong chin. "What you said just now, does it count for us?" "Totally, utterly counts. No words seem to be enough to express how I feel, I love you," Decker said. "I love you so much that it seems like I didn't know anything about myself until then." , as if I had never really lived."

"You didn't say you were not only an art critic but also a poet." "There's a lot you don't know," Decker said. "I want to know all about it right now." Beth kissed him again, and stood up. Decker's throat tightened as he admired her nakedness.Her body, both in shape and in its suppleness, resembled an athlete's, which reminded Decker of the sensual nude women created by ancient Greek sculptors. "What's with that piece on your left side?" Beth asked. "My left side?" "I mean the scar." Decker looked down.It was a bumpy scar the size of a fingertip. "Oh, that's just—"

"You still have one on your right thigh." Beth knelt down to examine it carefully, frowning. "Although I don't understand much, I want to say—" Decker couldn't think of a way to avoid the subject. "These are gunshot wounds." "Gunshot wound? How the hell—" "I don't know how to hide myself." "what are you talking about?" "I was a member of the U.S. Special Forces that invaded Grenada in 1983." Decker was again heartbroken that he had to lie to her. "I didn't get down in time when the gunshots rang out."

"Did they give you a medal?" "For such stupidity?" Decker giggled. "What I got was a Purple Heart for a wounded soldier." "These scars look painful." "It doesn't hurt at all." "Can I touch it?" "Please." She ran her fingers gently over the sunken scar on his side, then the one on his thigh. "Are they really painless?" "Occasional pain during wet winter nights." "Tell me when it hurts, I know how to make you feel better." Beth leaned over and kissed one scar, then another. "Are the scars okay?" she asked.

"Everything is fine. It's a pity that when I was in the military hospital, there were no nurses like you." "With a nurse like me, you won't be able to sleep." Beth snuggled up beside him. "Sleeping isn't the most important thing," Decker said. He was very close to her, enjoying her warmth.For several minutes, none of them moved or spoke.Through the window, the crimson afterglow became more and more dignified. "I think it's time to take a shower," Beth said. "You can use the bathroom off the living room, or—" "Or what?"

"We share my bathroom." The white-lit bathroom is spacious enough for two to take a steam bath.Inside there is a tiled bench with a sprinkler on one side.After they soaped up, they sponged each other off and sprayed them with hot water to clean them off.Steam billowed and rolled around them.They kissed, stroked, hugged, their smooth bodies rubbing against each other.Finally, trembling, they collapsed on the bench, their hearts beating wildly, and they made love again.