Chapter 27 Chapter Twenty Six

An hour later, Dr. Sanders was lying in bed when he heard footsteps in the corridor, followed by a rapid knock on the door.He didn't answer.Someone pressed the doorknob, and the door was locked. "Who is it?" the doctor called impatiently. The visitor immediately responded in a subdued excited voice. "Doctor, it's me, Fred, I want to see you." Captain Nichols came back to the Fenton and the doctor smoked six pipes, which he hated to be interrupted.His thinking is as clear as the geometric figures in a child's picture book: squares, rectangles, circles, triangles, they flow through his brain in an orderly manner, and this feeling makes him extraordinarily happy.And this pleasure was part of the ecstatic pleasure his body felt.He lifted the mosquito net and walked towards the door along the unpaved ground.He opened the door, and there stood a night watchman with a lantern and a blanket wrapped around his head to keep out the night air.Fred Black stood behind the Night's Watch.

"Doctor, let me in. There is something important." "Wait, I'll light the lamp." By the light of the lantern, he found matches and lit the oil lamp.Kai laid out a mat on the veranda and slept outside the doctor's door.This movement woke him up, and he stood on the mat, rubbing his sleepy blackthorn-like eyes.Fred tipped the night watchman and sent him away. "Akai, go to sleep." The doctor said, "It's none of your business." "Look, doc, you've got to go to Eric's right now," Fred said. "Something's up."

"What happened?" He looked at Fred, who was paper-pale and trembling in every limb. "He shot himself." "My God! How do you know?" "I just came from him and he died." As soon as Fred spoke, the doctor instinctively began to pack up the equipment, and then stopped after hearing this sentence. "you sure?" "Very." "Then what do you want me to do?" "Can't just leave him there like this! Come with me, God!" His voice was hoarse, like he was about to cry, "Maybe you can do something more."

"Who else is there?" "No one, he's lying there alone, I can't bear the sight, doctor, you must do something for him, for God's sake, go now." "What's in your hand?" Fred lowered his head and found that his hands were covered with blood, so he instinctively wiped it on his canvas pants. "Don't do that!" the doctor grabbed his wrist and said loudly, "Come here and wash it off." Dr. Saunders grabbed Fred's wrist with one hand and the oil lamp in the other, and led Fred to the bathroom.It was a small, dark, square cubicle with a concrete floor.There was a large bathtub in the corner of the bathroom. When I took a shower, I used a small tin basin to scoop up water from it, and then rushed it over my body.The doctor handed Fred a basin of water and a bar of soap to wash his hands.

"Is there blood on you?" He held up the oil lamp and shone around Fred. "I don't think so." Doctors flushed away the blood-mixed water, and they went back to the bedroom.Fred was terrified by the blood on his hand, and he tried hard to stabilize his hysterical mood.He was very pale and clenched his fists tightly, but the doctor saw that he still couldn't control his violently trembling body. "You'd better have a drink now. Akay, give this gentleman a whiskey without water." Akai got up and brought a cup, and slowly poured pure whiskey into it.Fred drank it down.The doctor looked at him intently.

"Listen, boy, this is someone else's territory, and we don't want to get involved with the Dutch authorities here, they are not easy people to live with." "But you can't just let him lie in a pool of blood!" "Didn't you flee because of something you committed in Sydney? The police will ask you a lot of questions. Do you want them to send a telegram to Sydney?" "I don't care, I'm tired of it all." "Don't be stupid. If he's dead, there's nothing you can do, and neither can I. We'd better get out of here, and you'd better get out of here as soon as possible. Anyone out there seeing you?"

"where?" "His home." The doctor said anxiously. "No, I was only there for a short while, and then I came straight over." "Where's his servant?" "It's probably asleep. They live in the back." "So the Night's Watch was the only one who saw you. Why did you wake him up?" "I can't come in, the door is locked, I have to find you." "It's okay, there are many reasons why you came to me in the middle of the night. How did you go to Eric's place?" "Because I have something to say to him, and I can't wait for a moment."

"I guess he did commit suicide. You didn't kill him, did you?" "Me?" Fred gasped in horror, "How is it possible! He... I wouldn't hurt a hair on him. If he was my brother, I would give him all my admiration .He was the best friend I could have had." Fred's remarks disgusted the doctor, and he frowned.However, he believed that Fred was innocent. After hearing the doctor's question just now, he was very shocked, which was enough to show that he was telling the truth. "Then what the hell is going on?" "God, I don't know, he must be crazy. How the hell did I think he would do such a thing!"

"Speak slowly, kid, don't worry, I won't betray you." "It's because of the old Swann girl, Louise." The doctor's eyes sharpened suddenly, but he didn't interrupt Fred. "I had a blast with her tonight." "You? But you saw her for the first time yesterday." "I know, but so what, she's smitten with me the first time she sees me, I know. I'm smitten with her too. I haven't had a crush on anyone since I left Sydney, somehow , I just can't get my heart set on these locals. When I danced with her, the feeling came. I could have captured her then. We went to the garden while you guys were playing bridge, and I kissed her, and she didn't have any Resist. When a girl is like this, you can't give her a moment to think. I was smitten with her. I have never seen a more beautiful woman. If she told me to jump off the cliff, I would too No hesitation or anything. When she came with her dad this morning, I asked her if we could meet in private and she said no. I asked her if I could go to her place after everyone had gone to sleep and be in the pool together Take a shower and she says no, but she doesn't say why. I tell her my soul is in her, and it's true, God, she's a stunner. I take her aboard the brig , led her around and I kissed her again. Damn Nichols never left us alone for a moment. I told her I'd go to the manor tonight and she said she wouldn't but I knew she would , just like I longed for her, she longed for me. So, when I got to the manor, she was already there waiting. The manor in the dark is beautiful, but there are too many mosquitoes, biting like mad Us, this is not something that flesh and blood can bear. So I asked, can I go to her room? She said she was scared at first, but I said it would be fine, and finally she agreed. "

Fred stopped.The doctor looked at him with heavy eyelids.His pupils were shrunk like needlepoints from the opium.He listened and thought silently. "Finally she said I'd better go quickly, I had my clothes on and no shoes so I wouldn't make any noise on the veranda. She went out first to see if anyone was in the garden. Sometimes old Wang couldn't sleep and would walk around there like it was a deck. Then I slipped out and jumped off the verandah. I was sitting on the floor putting on my shoes and then suddenly someone grabbed me and lifted me up ...it was Eric. He was as strong as a bull and he lifted me like a baby. He covered my mouth, but I couldn't scream even if I wanted to. I was so scared. ...then he grabbed me by the neck, I think he was trying to strangle me. I was so limp, I couldn't even struggle, I couldn't see his face, but I could hear his breathing, God, I really thought I was done, but he let me go, threw me to the ground, hit my head sideways with the back of his hand, I think so, I was like a log. He stood condescendingly, I didn't dare to move, I was afraid he would kill me if I moved, then suddenly he turned around and flew away. I stood up and looked at the house. Louise should have heard nothing. At that time I thought, should I tell her, but I didn't dare, I was afraid someone would hear me knocking on the window. I didn't want to frighten her, but I didn't know what to do, I walked back and found that I had no shoes on I had no choice but to go back and put the shoes on. I didn't find them at first, and I panicked. On the way back, I was anxious, worried that Eric would ambush me. In the dark night, in such a road full of ghosts It's not a joke to walk on the road with nothing, and beware of a big, bulky man who will jump out and beat you up at any moment. He wants to wrench my neck like killing a chicken Just as easy, I have no ability to fight back. I walked slowly all the way, eyes wide open, I thought if I spotted him first, I ran immediately. Confronting someone who you have absolutely no chance of winning Makes sense, and I know I'm running a lot faster than him. I think I'm jumpy, and after walking a mile, I'm not scared anymore. Then, I figured I'd have to talk to him anyway. If it was Others, I don't care at all, but somehow I can't stand him thinking I'm a goddamn slut. You don't understand, but I've never met a guy like that, he's so straight up, so you Can't stand him thinking you're dishonest. Most people, you know, are no better than Eric. I mean, if you can't see that he's a good guy in a million, you are A complete fool. Know what I mean?"

The doctor smiled coldly, with a hint of mockery in his smile.His lips are drawn back to reveal his large yellow teeth, reminiscent of a gorilla growl. "God, I get it, it's distressing, overwhelmed. This kind of thing really takes a toll on relationships and it's pretty humbling, isn't it?" "My God, can't you just talk like a normal person?" "continue." "I think I have to make it clear to him. I'm going to tell him everything. I'm going to marry Louise. I can't help myself to her. It's a human instinct. You don't understand it when you're old. For a fifty-year-old, these are trivial things. I know that if I don’t explain it to him, I won’t be able to live for a minute. I went to his house, stood outside the door, and kept cheering myself up. I stood there for a long time. You know, it takes a lot of courage to enter his house. In the end, I broke my heart and walked in. I couldn't help but think, since he didn't kill me before, he won't kill me now. I know he didn't lock the door, the first time we went there, he pushed the handle and got in. But, God, my heart was pounding as I walked down the corridor. I shut the door, The room was dark, I called his name, but he didn't respond. I knew where his room was, so I walked over and knocked on the door. How should I say, I couldn't believe he was asleep, so I knocked again Knocking on the door and yelling 'Eric! Eric!' Finally I yelled as hard as I could but my throat was so dry it was as hoarse as a raven's. I don't know why he No sound, I think he must be sitting there, listening quietly. I was so frightened that I almost turned and ran away, but instead of doing that, I pushed the latch and the door was unlocked, so I I opened the door. There was no light in the room, I couldn't see anything, and I called his name again, and I said, 'For God's sake, talk to me, Eric.' And I A match was lit, and I was amazed by what happened next. He was lying on the ground, right at my feet, and if I took another step, he would trip me. The match went out, and I couldn't see anything, I yelled at him, and I thought he was passed out, or drunk. I tried to strike another match, but the damn thing wouldn't light at all, and when it did, I brought the flame up to him to see , my god, half his head was blown off. The match went out again, and I struck another, and I saw a lamp, so I lit it. I knelt down and touched his hand, Still warm, and in his other hand he held a revolver. I cupped his face to see if he could be saved. His face was covered in blood, God, what a horrible one that was The hole! Then I ran right up here. I'll never forget that scene." He buried his face in his hands and rocked back and forth in pain.Then he choked out a sob, collapsed in his chair, turned his face away and began to cry.The doctor let him cry, then reached for a cigarette, lit it, and took a deep drag. "Did you turn off the lights when you left?" he asked at last. "Oh, damn lamp!" cried Fred anxiously. "What a fool I am!" "It doesn't matter. He could have committed suicide by lighting a lamp. It's strange that his servants didn't hear anything. I think they must have thought it was the Chinese who were setting off firecrackers." Fred ignored the doctor's words, saying that these were meaningless. "For God's sake, why would he do that?" Fred said desperately. "He's engaged to Louise." The doctor's words were like a bolt from the blue, and Fred couldn't help but staggered.His face turned livid in an instant.He stared in horror, the eyeballs seemed to fall out. "Eric? He never mentioned it to me." "I think he probably thinks it's none of your business." "She didn't tell me, she didn't say a word. God, I would never have anything to do with her if I knew it. You must be guessing, it's impossible!" "He told me himself." "Does he love her madly?" "Very." "Then why not kill me or her, but kill yourself?" Dr. Sanders laughed. "Curious, eh?" "For God's sake, don't laugh at me. I'm miserable enough, nothing could have been worse than what I've been through. But this... Seriously, she's nothing to me , if I knew they were engaged, I wouldn't even think about hanging out with her. He's the best friend I could ever have, and I wouldn't hurt him for anything. He must be cursing inside I'm a beast! He's been so good to me!" Tears welled up in his eyes, and the round teardrops trickled down his cheeks slowly.He wept bitterly. "Isn't life just stupid? You do something recklessly and it turns out to be costly. I really feel cursed." He looks at the doctor.His lips trembled, and a deep sadness clouded his beautiful eyes.Dr. Saunders examined his emotions at the moment.He didn't share the slight satisfaction he found in this sad young man.On the one hand, he felt that he deserved his pain completely, and on the other hand, seeing him so sad, he felt strangely sorry for him.He looked so young and his grief was so real that the doctor couldn't help but be moved. "You'll get out," he said. "There's nothing you can't get out of." "I wish I was dead. My daddy said I was a villain, and I think he was right. There was trouble everywhere I went. I swear it wasn't my fault, that slut bitch Why the fuck is she messing with me? Can you imagine being engaged to a nice guy like Eric and being able to sleep with a guy you've only met once. One thing is good though, he's off this bitch forever .” "Stop talking nonsense." "I may be a notorious villain, but by God she's worse than me. I thought I'd be able to start a new life, and now it's all ruined." He hesitated for a moment. "Remember that telegram this morning? The news was so startling that I didn't see it at first. There was a letter from Batavia to me, and it's all right to go there now. At first the news Really shocked me, I didn't know whether to laugh or what, the telegram said I had died of scarlet fever in a fever institute outside of Sydney. It took me a while to realize what that meant. My dad was from NSW Important people, there was a contagion there, they took a guy to the hospital, put my name on it, because they had to explain to the outside world why I didn't go to work or something. And when that guy died, I died too I know my dad and he's happy to get rid of me. Anyway 'I' is lying comfortably in the family grave now. Dad was a great manager and wouldn't take the risk if he had the means, And I guess, as long as I'm on Earth, he's not going to be safe. They won this election again, you see, with an overwhelming majority, a clean sweep. I can imagine him wearing a black veil on his arm." He smiled coldly.Dr. Saunders suddenly threw a question at him. "What's wrong with you?" Fred looked away, lowered his voice, and said angrily, "I killed someone." "If I were you, I wouldn't tell anyone," said the doctor. "You don't look surprised at all. Have you ever killed someone?" "It's inevitable when you practice medicine." Fred gave him a quick look, a smile on his pained lips. "Doctor, you are a queer man. It would be a blessing if anyone could see you. When people talk to you, somehow nothing seems to matter to you. Something to you Is it important? Is there anything to convince you?" "Why did you kill him? For fun?" "Who's to say no, it's so damn fun! You don't know what I've been through! I hope it doesn't make my hair gray. It's something that haunts me and I'll never get over it. When I think about it , I was happy at first, but when I suddenly remembered this incident, my good mood disappeared. Many times I was afraid of going to sleep, because I often dreamed that my hands were tied and put on the gallows. Sometimes Then half a dozen times, at night when no one was around, I literally nearly jumped off the boat, and I was going to either swim to drown or get eaten by a shark. So when I get that telegram, you can't Understand how relieved I am, you don't understand what it means to me. God, a big stone in my heart has finally hit the ground. I'm safe. You know, when I was on a small sailboat , I have never really felt safe. Everywhere I go, I am afraid that someone will show up and arrest me. When I first saw you, I thought you were a detective and you were here to investigate me. You Know what was the first thing I thought this morning? 'Finally getting a good night's sleep now.' And then this happened, wow, I'm damned." "Don't say it so badly." "What shall I do next? Where shall I go? Tonight, as the girl and I lay our heads on each other's arms, I thought: Why don't I marry her and settle down here? 'Fenton' It will come in handy, Nichols can take a boat back with you. You can get me the letter from Batavia, I guess there will be some money in it, my mother will definitely force my old man to send something .I also thought about Eric, we can do business together." "I'm afraid it won't work, but you can still marry Louise." "Me?" cried Fred. "Would I be in the mood to marry her after what happened? I don't want to see her. I swear to God I never want to see her again. I won't forgive her." Yes, forever." "Then what are you going to do?" "Only God knows. I can't go home, I'm dead and buried in the family grave. I'd really like to see Sydney, George Street, Manly Cove again. I'm all alone in the world right now. I think I'm a pretty good accountant, maybe I can get a bookkeeping job. I don't know where to go, like a stray dog." "If I were you, the first thing I would do would be to go back to the 'Fenton' and get some sleep. You are very tired now, and your mind will be much clearer when you wake up in the morning." "I can't get back on the boat, I hate it. You know, on the boat, how many times I wake up in a cold sweat, with my heart pounding, dreaming about those guys opening the door to my cell, and I know the rope is in Waiting for me! And now Eric is lying in a pool of blood, half of his head is gone, God, how can you tell me to sleep!" "Okay then, you can sleep on the chair, I'm going to sleep." "Thank you, go to sleep, will it bother you if you smoke?" "I'll give you something to make sure you fall asleep." The doctor took out his syringe and gave Fred a shot of morphine.Then turned off the lights and got into the mosquito net.