Chapter 22 three

It was past eleven o'clock at noon.The prince knew that if he went to the Yepanchin's house in the city, he would only meet the general (he couldn't get away for a while because of his busy business), and it was unlikely that he would meet him.He wondered if the general would catch him and take him at once to Pavlovsk, but before he went to Pavlovsk he still wanted very much to call on someone else.The prince decided first to visit a family he was eager to see, preferring to risk a late visit to the Epanchins and the mother and daughter, and to postpone the trip to Pavlovsk until tomorrow.

Then again, the visit was in one way risky for him.He felt embarrassed and hesitated again and again.He knew that this family was on Pea Street not far from Huayuan Street. The reason why he decided to go there first was to make up his mind before reaching the place he was going to. When he came to the intersection of Pea Street and Garden Street, he was so excited that he was surprised by it. He didn't expect his heart to beat so painfully.There was a house, probably because of its special appearance, which attracted his attention from afar.The Duke remembered afterwards that he had said to himself: "It must be that house." He came up to him very curiously, wanting to check whether his guess was correct.He felt that if he guessed right, he would find it particularly unpleasant for some reason.The house is large, gloomy, three-story, without architectural art at all, and was originally green, but it has become dirty due to disrepair.Such houses were built at the end of the last century. Although there are few or even few houses, some of them remain almost unchanged in these streets of Petersburg, and Petersburg is changing so rapidly that everything Everything has changed.The houses were solidly built, with thick walls and very few windows, sometimes with iron bars on the ground floor windows.Most of the establishments downstairs are banks.Those who sit in the bank and do business are all castration sects. They live upstairs and the house is rented.This kind of house gives people an inhospitable and cold feeling inside and out. Everything seems to be sneaky and hidden. The combination of lines above, of course, has its own mysteries.The people who live in these houses are almost all buyers and sellers.The Duke went to the gate and glanced at the sign nailed to the door, which read: "Rogozhin's Mansion of Hereditary Honorary Citizens".

Hesitating no longer, he pushed open the glass door, which slammed shut behind him, and climbed the stairs directly opposite the door to the second floor.The staircase was dark, of stone, and of rough construction.But the guardrails on both sides are painted red.He knew that Rogozhin, his mother and brother occupied the entire second floor of the drab building.One of the servants opened the door for the duke, and led him in unannounced, for a long walk.They first passed through a hall with "imitation marble" walls, an oak parquet floor, and heavy, clumsy furniture from the twenties.Again they went through pigeon-coops, twisting and turning, going up two or three steps now, then down the same number of steps, before finally knocking on a door.The door was opened by Parvin Semyonitch himself.As soon as he saw the Duke, his face turned pale, and he was stunned on the spot, like a stone sculpture for a while, his eyes were frightened and stood still, the corners of his mouth twisted, and a smile flickered across his mouth, showing a high degree of confusion ,—it seemed to him that the Duke's visit was impossible, almost miraculous.The duke was surprised, though he had expected such a thing to happen.

"Parfin, maybe, I came at the wrong time, I can go." He finally said embarrassingly. "It's time! It's time!" Parfin finally came to his senses, "Come in, come in!" They call each other you.When they were in Moscow, the two of them often met and talked together.During the meeting, there were even some moments where the two of them understood each other, which was unforgettable.And right now, they haven't seen each other for more than three months. Rogozhin's face was as pale as ever, and convulsions seemed to pass over his face from time to time.Although he greeted the guests to enter the room, he still seemed very embarrassed.When he led the prince to the soft chair and asked him to sit down at the table, the prince occasionally turned his head and saw his unusually strange and heavy eyes, so he couldn't help but stop.He thought of the heavy and melancholy past not long ago.He did not sit down, but stood motionless, gazing into Rogozhin's eyes, which seemed to flash brighter for the first moment.Finally, Rogozhin smiled, but was still a little embarrassed and seemed bewildered.

"Why are you staring at me so hard?" he muttered. "Sit down!" The duke sat down. "Parfen," he said, "tell yourselves, do you know that I'm coming to Petersburg today?" "I expected you to come, and I guessed right," he smiled wryly, and added, "But how did I know you were coming today?" The Duke was still more astonished by Rogoren's substitution of rhetorical questions for answers, with a certain sudden impulsiveness and strange irritation. "Even if you know I'm coming today, why are you so angry?" the Duke whispered awkwardly.

"What do you mean by that?" "Today, when I got off the train, I saw a pair of eyes, just like the eyes you just looked at me from behind." "There is such a thing! Whose eyes are these?" Rogozhin muttered suspiciously.The prince felt as if he shuddered. "I don't know. I thought it was my illusion when I flashed in the crowd. Recently, I've been in a trance, and I always have a hallucination. Brother Parfen, now I always have a trance feeling, almost like five It's the same as when I first got sick years ago." "Well, maybe it's your illusion, I don't know..." Parffin muttered.

At this time, the friendly smile on his face was very inconsistent with his expression, as if something was broken in this smile, and Parffin tried to stick it together, but he couldn't do it. "Why, are you going abroad again?" he asked, adding abruptly, "Do you remember that after last autumn we rode in the same carriage from Pskov, and I went back to Petersburg, while you... Cloak, remember, and shoe covers?" After speaking, Rogozhin suddenly laughed, this time with a look of open resentment, and he seemed very happy that he could finally take this opportunity to vent his resentment.

"Have you settled down here completely?" the Duke asked, looking at the study. "Yes, in my own house. Where else?" "We haven't seen each other for a long time. I've heard so many things about you that at first glance, it doesn't look like you did it." "Never mind, say what you like," Rogozhin replied coldly. "However, you let all those people disband, and you also stay in your hometown and don't go out to cause trouble. That's good. Is this house yours alone, or all of you?" "This house belongs to my mother. You can go to her place through the corridor from here."

"Where does your brother live?" "My brother Semyon Semyonitch lives in the wing." "Is he married?" "Widowers. What do you ask for?" The duke looked at him, but did not answer.He suddenly fell into deep thought, as if he didn't hear his question.Rogozhin didn't ask any further questions, and waited for him to wake up from his contemplation.The two were silent for a while. "When I approached, I was still a hundred paces away, and I knew right away that this was your house," said the Duke. "Why is this so?" "I don't know why. This house has the appearance of your whole family and your whole Rogozhin family. If you ask me why I came to such a conclusion, I can't explain it. Of course it's nonsense. It makes me feel I was very disturbed, even scared. I never thought you would live in such a house, but when I saw you, I immediately thought: 'This is the house he should live in!'”

"See what you said!" Rogozhin smiled vaguely, not fully understanding the prince's ambiguity. "This house was built by my grandfather," he said. "In the past, the Khludyakov family lived in this building, and they still live here." "It's spooky. It's spooky here too." The Duke said, looking at the study.It was a large room, tall and somewhat dark, filled with all kinds of furniture—mostly large desks, writing desks, and bookcases in which ledgers and various paperwork were placed.The big red sheepskin sofa was obviously used as a bed for Rogozhin.The prince saw two or three books lying on the table where Rogozhin had invited him to sit, one of which was Solovyov's "History" with its pages open and a bookmark in it.There are several oil paintings hanging on the wall. The frames are painted with gold, which is already dull, and the picture is also dark.One striking full-length portrait attracted the Duke's attention: it represented a man of about fifty, in a plain German coat with a long skirt, with two medals around his neck, and a grizzled beard, Thin and short, yellow face, wrinkled face, suspicious eyes, deep and slightly sad.

"I am afraid this is your father?" asked the duke. "It's my father," Rogozhin replied with an unpleasant sneer, as if at the very mention of his late father he was ready to make some rude jokes at once. "Does he belong to the old manners?" "No, he went to church, and he did say that the old school was more correct. He had a great respect for castrations, too. This was his study. Why do you ask him if he's old school?" "Are you going to have a wedding here?" "Yes," replied Rogozhin, almost trembling at the suddenness of the question. "Do it soon?" "You know it yourself, it's not up to me." "Parfen, I am not your enemy, and I will never make trouble for it. I have stated it to you before, at almost the same moment, and I will repeat it to you now. In Moscow, you were I did not obstruct the wedding, you know that. The first time, she came to me by herself, almost at the time of the wedding, and begged me to 'save' her and help her leave you. I What I am repeating to you now is her exact words. Later, she ran away from me again, and you found her again and took her to get married. Some people say that this time she left you again and fled here. This is Really? That's what Lebedev told me, so I'm here. As for the reconciliation of the two of you here, I first heard about it on the train yesterday, when an old friend of yours told Mine, if you want to know, his name is Zalyozhev. I have come here for another purpose: I want to persuade her to go abroad to recover from her illness. She is seriously disturbed both physically and mentally, especially the brain, I think, Her illness needs to be recuperated. I don't want to go abroad with her. I want to get it all done without my company. I'm telling you the truth. If it's true, you'll be fine with the matter. If I say it again, I will never see her again, and never see you again. You know that I will not lie to you, because I have always been honest with you. I have never I have concealed my attitude towards this matter from you, and I have always said that she will be ruined if she marries you. You will also perish... Maybe you are worse than her. If you break up again, I will feel I am very satisfied, but I have no intention of causing trouble and sabotage among you. You can rest assured that you don’t need to suspect me. You also know that I have never been your real rival in love. That's it. Look, you're smiling now, and I know what you're sneering at. Yes, we were separated there, lived in different cities, and you know all about it. You know, I used to I just explained to you that I love her 'not out of love, but out of pity'. I think I'm being factual when I say that. You said, you get what I mean, really? Do you really understand? Look at you, it looks like there is a deep hatred! I'm here to ask you to take it easy, because you are my best friend. I love you very much, Parffin. I'm leaving now and forever Not coming back. Farewell." The Duke stood up. "Sit with me for a while," Palfin whispered, without getting up from his seat, he lowered his head and held it with his right hand, "We haven't seen each other for a long time." The duke sat down.The two were relatively speechless. "Lev Nikolayevich, as soon as you're not around, I'm hostile to you. During the three months I haven't seen you, I've hated you every minute, really. I'd like to poison you instantly! I'd like to do it. Now you've been sitting with me for a quarter of an hour, and all my resentment is gone, and you're as lovely as ever. You Sit with me for a while..." "When I am by your side, you trust me. When I am not by your side, you immediately disbelieve me and doubt me. You are really like your father!" The Duke replied with a friendly smile, trying not to reveal his true feelings. "I'm sitting with you, and when I hear your voice, I believe in you. I know very well in my heart that you and I can't compare, you and I..." "Why did you add that? Look at you, you're angry again," said the prince, amazed at Rogozhin's inconstancy. "My brother, we don't need to be consulted on this matter," he replied, "it is settled without our consultation. You see, our love is different, and everything is different." After a moment of silence, he continued. Continue to whisper, "You said, you love her out of pity, but I have no pity for her. And she hates me the most. Now I dream of her every night: she always makes fun of others Me. That's the way it is, man. She says she's going to marry me, but she doesn't have me in her heart, and forgets me like a shoe. Believe it or not, I haven't seen her for five days Because I dare not go to her, she will ask me: 'What are you doing here?' She not only humiliates me..." "How can you be humiliated? How can you?" "Just pretend not to know! You just said that she left me and ran away with you when the wedding was about to take place." "You don't believe it yourself..." "Didn't she humiliate me with that officer Zemtyuzhnikov in Moscow? I know perfectly well that she was trying to make me look bad, and that she set the date for her own marriage." after." "Impossible!" cried the Duke. "I know perfectly well," Rogozhin asserted confidently, "do you think she's not like that? Brother, she's not like that, it goes without saying. It's all nonsense. And When you're with her, she's really not that kind of person, maybe she'll be terrified when she thinks about such things, but when she's with me, she's just that kind of woman. That's all. She sees me as the most useless trash. I know very well that she and Keller, that is, with the officer who throws fists, made up a rumor just to make me a laughing stock... You probably don't know how she played with me in Moscow Let's go! How much I wasted, how much money I wasted..." "Then...how are you going to get married now!...what will you do later?" asked the duke terrified. Rogozhin looked at the prince with a heavy and terrible expression, but did not answer. "I haven't been to her. It's the fifth day today," he said after a moment of silence. "I'm always afraid that she'll throw me out. She always says, 'I'm in charge of my own affairs. As long as I want to , I'll tell you to get the hell out of here, and I'll go abroad by myself.' ('That's what she told me she was going to go abroad', he said incidentally, and looked the duke straight in the eyes with some strangeness) Sometimes Naturally it’s to scare people. I don’t know why, but she always thinks I’m ridiculous. But sometimes she really frowns, listless, and refuses to say a word. This is what I’m afraid of. A while ago, I thought: In the future, I will Couldn't go empty-handed,--but it only amused her, and she got very angry. She gave a scarf I gave her to her maid, Katka, even though she had lived a good life before. I’m afraid I’ve never seen such a good scarf when I was very rich. I didn’t dare to mention to her when we got married. What kind of fiancé can I be if I’m afraid to see her alone? Now I’m sitting at home , when I couldn’t bear it any longer, I would sneak to the street where she lived, walk up and down in front of her house, or hide in some corner to peek. A few days ago, I guarded the gate of her house Nearby, I kept watch almost until dawn——I vaguely saw something flickering in front of my eyes. She may have peeked out of the window, as if to say: "Even if you see that I am lying to you, can you take it?" What about me?' I couldn't help saying: 'You know it yourself!'" "what do you know?" "How do I know!" Rogozhin laughed fiercely. "Although I followed her for a long time in Moscow, I never caught any reason that she was with someone else. Once, I insisted He grabbed her and said: "You promised to marry me, to marry someone who is innocent, but do you know what you are now?" I said: "You are this thing now!"" "You told her?" "said." "and after?" "Later she said: 'Now you are my servant, I don't necessarily want you, let alone your wife.' I said: 'Then I will hang on, anyway, it's over!" She said: 'I'll call Keller right away and tell him to throw you out.' So I jumped on her and beat her up so badly that she was bruised and bruised." "Impossible!" cried the Duke. "I tell you, I was beaten," Rogozhin confirmed in a low voice, his eyes shining, "and then I didn't eat, drink, sleep or leave her house for a whole day and two nights, and I knelt before her. , I said: "If you don't forgive me, I won't go out even if I die. If you let someone drag me out, I will jump into the river. Because without you, how can I live now?" Crying like a madman, she's going to kill me with a knife, she's scolding me, she's taunting me. She calls Zaryozhev, Keller, Zemtyuzhnikov, everyone Come on, let them see me make a fool of myself, and humiliate me to my face. She said, 'Gentlemen, we are all going to the theater today, and he won't go, so let him stay here, and I can't let him be bound hand and foot. Parr The servants will bring you tea while I am away, Finn Semyonitch, and you must be hungry today.” When she came back from the play, she was alone, and she said: “They are cowards and The bastard is afraid of you. He even threatened me that he won't leave easily, and he might kill you. Now I'm going to sleep in the bedroom, and I won't lock the door when I go in. See if I'm afraid of you! I'm going to let You know and see this! Have you had your tea?' I said, 'No, and I don't want to.' 'If you don't drink it, it's up to you, but it doesn't suit you.' She did what she said, The room was unlocked. The next morning, she came out of the room—laughing, and she said, 'Are you crazy? Don't eat or drink, and won't you starve to death?' I said, 'Forgive me.' 'I've said it: I don't want to forgive you, and I don't want to marry you. Have you been sitting in this chair all night without sleeping?' I said: 'Yes, didn't sleep.' 'How clever! That Don't you want to drink tea and eat now?' 'I said no eat or drink - spare me!' she said: 'It doesn't suit you, you know, it's like putting a saddle on a cow .Aren't you trying to frighten me? How unfortunate I am that you're sitting there starving, and frighten me!" That appearance, I found it very strange, how did her resentment disappear? You must know that she is a person who loves to hold grudges, and often holds grudges against others for a long time! I thought at the time, she must think of me as a dirty, even serious person. I can't even hate it. It's true. She said, "Do you know what the Pope is?" I said, "I've heard of it." I haven’t studied the general history of the world.’ I said: ‘I haven’t studied anything.’ She said: ‘Well, I’ll let you listen to a story: Once upon a time there was a pope who was very angry with an emperor. There was no food or drink for three days, bare feet, kneeling in front of his palace, and the Pope had to forgive him. Guess what, the emperor knelt for three days, what was going on in his head, he What did you swear in private? . . . Wait a minute,' she said, 'I'll just read it to you!' She jumped up, and brought a book. 'Here's poetry,' she said.' She Just read to me the poem about how the Emperor gambled for three days to get revenge on the Pope. She said: 'Don't you like the story, don't you?Parfen Semyonitch? ’ I said: ‘That thing you read is right. ''Ah, you also say that is right, which means that you will probably also swear that once she marries me, I will settle accounts with her and play tricks on her! ' I said: 'I don't know, maybe, I have the same idea. ''How could you not know? ’ I said: ‘I really don’t know, I haven’t thought about it yet. ''Then what are you thinking now? ''As soon as you stood up from your seat and walked past me, I looked at you and stared at you. As soon as your clothes rustled, my heart sank. As soon as you walked out of the room, I just think back to every word you said, what voice you said it in, what you said.But I didn’t think about anything all night last night. I kept listening to how you breathed when you fell asleep, and how you moved twice…” She smiled: “You probably also thought about beating me, didn’t you think ?Don't remember either? ’ I said: ‘Maybe, I don’t know. ''What if I don't forgive you and don't marry you? ''As I said, I would commit suicide by jumping into the river. ''Maybe you have to kill me before jumping into the river...' After that, she became thoughtful.Then she got angry and walked out.An hour later, she came out of the bedroom again, sullen.She said: 'I've decided to marry you, Parfen Semyonitch, not because I'm afraid of you, but because it's the same thing, it's all over.How can there be any better way?Sit down,' she said, 'and let them bring you food right away. ’ She added: ‘Since I marry you, I will be your faithful wife, you don’t have to doubt or worry about this. ’ Then she was silent for a while, and then said: ‘After all, you are not my slave, and I used to think you were quite a slave. ’ She immediately fixed the date, but a week later she ran away from me again, went to Lebedev, and came here.As soon as I arrived, she said to me: "I didn't completely reject you, I just want to wait, as long as I like, because my own affairs are still in my own hands."If you want, just wait. 'That's how we are now... What do you think of all this, Lev Nikolaevich? " "What do you think yourself?" asked the prince, looking at Rogozhin sadly. "Can I still think?" he blurted out.He originally wanted to add a few words, but he was immersed in boundless distress, hesitated to speak, and remained silent. The duke got up and wanted to take his leave again. "I'm not going to get in the way," he murmured thoughtfully, as if answering a hidden thought in his own mind. "Well, I have something to ask you!" Rogozhin suddenly became excited, and his eyes began to shine brightly, "I don't understand why you are so accommodating to me, giving in again and again? Don't you love her at all? After all, you have been troubled by this in the past, I have seen it with my own eyes. So why are you rushing here without stopping? Out of pity? (A bitter sneer appears on his face.) Hehe !" "You think I'm lying to you?" asked the Duke. "No, I believe you, but the matter confuses me. Your pity may be stronger than my love!" A kind of resentment and a look of expressiveness burned on his face. "How should I put it, your love and hate are intertwined and inseparable," the Duke smiled slightly. "Once the love is gone, it may be even worse. Brother Parfen, I'm telling you this bluntly." of……" "I'm going to kill her?" The Duke shuddered. "Because of your love now, of all the pain you are going through now, you will hate her deeply. What I can't understand is how she would marry you again. When I heard this yesterday, I almost couldn't believe it. At the same time, she was very sad. You know, she rejected you twice and ran away when she was about to get married, which shows that she has a premonition!... What does she need from you now? Does she need your money? This is Nonsense. Just talking about money, you probably spent a lot of money. Is it just to find a husband? She can find a husband besides you. Finding anyone is better than you, because you might really kill her Yes, she probably knows that all too well by now. How could you love her so much? Yes, unless it's this... I've heard people say that there is such a kind of person who is looking for such a love... …but……" The Duke paused in the middle of his speech, lost in thought. "Why are you sneering at my father's portrait again?" asked Rogozhin, who had been watching closely for every change in the prince's face, for any sudden flash of expression. "Why am I laughing? Because it suddenly occurred to me that if you hadn't had this unlucky incident and this obsessed love, you might have become the same person as your father, and very quickly. At that time, you would sit alone in this building in silence. Marry a submissive and taciturn wife, you don’t talk much, you have a stern face, you don’t trust anyone, and you don’t need to trust anyone at all, Just keep a straight face and make money in silence. The best you can do is to praise ancient books and be interested in making the sign of the cross with two fingers, and even then, when you are almost old..." "Just laugh at it. She looked at this portrait not long ago, and she said exactly the same thing as what you said just now! No wonder, you two seem to be wearing panties now, and you have the same opinion..." "Has she been here already?" asked the prince curiously. "Come here. She looked at the portrait for a long time, asked me a lot about my late father's life, and finally, she smiled at me and said, 'You will be like this too.' Erfen Semyonitch, you have strong emotions, which would send you to Siberia if you were foolish, but you are too clever to do such foolishness. ' (That's what she said, believe it or not? It's the first time I've heard her say that!) 'Stop messing around like you are now. You're saving your money because you're uneducated , like your father, sitting in this building with those castrations. Maybe later on, you'll convert too, and love the money you've got in your hand. If you save two million, maybe you can Maybe you can save up to 10 million, and then you will starve to death while guarding your big sacks of money, because you will risk your life in everything you do, and you must take your life.” That’s what she said, almost the same as the original The words were exactly the same. She had never talked to me like that before! She was always talking nonsense to me, or laughing at me, and even this time she was laughing and talking, and at last She made a serious face. She walked around and looked at the whole building, as if she was afraid of something. I said: 'I'm going to change everything and redecorate it, or I'm getting married I bought another house before.' She said: 'No need, don't change anything here, we will live like this. After I become your wife, I will live next to your mother.' I took her to see my mother ,——she respects her like her own daughter. My mother has been in the past, it has been two years, and she seems to be mentally abnormal (she is sick). After my father died, she became an old child completely , can't talk, can't walk, and sits all the time, just one thing, no matter who she sees, she nods to say hello to them. Look at that, if you don't feed her, she won't think about eating or drinking for three days. I picked up My mother's right hand pinched her two fingers together, and I said: "Mom, please bless her, she is going to marry me." She kissed my mother's hand emotionally. She said:' Your mother must have suffered a lot of misfortunes.’ Later, when she saw my book, she said, ‘How did you start reading Russian History? (When I was still in Moscow, one day, she told me But: "You also try to restore some human appearance, even if you read Solovyov's "Russian History", it seems that you don't understand anything.") It's very good for you to do this,' she said, 'just So, read on. Would you like me to make you a list myself, and tell you which books you should read first?" She never, never talked to me like that before, so it surprised me. I For the first time, I breathed a sigh of relief like a living person." "I'm glad to hear that, Parffin," said the Duke, with all his heart. "I'm glad. Who knows, maybe God will bring you two together." "Absolutely not!" Rogozhin exclaimed enthusiastically. "Listen, Parffin, if you love her so much, don't you want to win her respect? If you do, don't you have no hope? As I said, I can't understand: she Why marry you? But though I cannot solve the mystery, I have no doubts that there must be some good and reasonable reason for it. She is absolutely sure of your love. But , she must also be convinced that you have certain advantages, otherwise, this is simply impossible! What you said just now also confirms this. You also said that she thinks it is possible for her to treat you with the same attitude as before. Another language that is completely different from the way you speak has come to speak to you. You are suspicious and jealous, so when you find something bad, you exaggerate it. Of course, she is not like you say , thinks so bad of you. Otherwise, wouldn’t she marry you with the intention of jumping into the river or being stabbed? Is this possible? Who would deliberately jump into the river or be stabbed?” With a wry smile on his face, Parffin finished listening to the Duke's sincere words.It seemed that once his belief was established, it was unshakable. "How painfully you look at me now, Parffin!" blurted the Duke with a sense of heaviness. "Jump into the river or be stabbed!" he finally said. "Hmph! She married me only to wait for me to stab her! Duke, don't you really understand what's going on until now? ?” "I do not understand what you mean." "Well, maybe you really don't understand, hehe! No wonder some people say you are... that one. She loves another person, you have to understand this. Just like I love her now, she also loves another person now One person. Do you know who this other person is? This person is you! Why, don't you know?" "I?" "You! She was in love with you then, from your birthday. But she thought she couldn't marry you, because she was afraid that by doing so she would seem to sully you and ruin your whole career. She said:' Everyone knows what kind of person I am.' She has been outspoken about this to this day. She said these words directly in front of me. She is afraid of ruining your career and tarnishing your reputation. As for marrying me , then it’s nothing, just marry if you marry—look, what does she think of me, please pay attention to this too!” "Then why did she leave you and come to find me, and...leave me and run..." "Leaving you again and running to find me! Huh! She has one idea for a while, and she is capricious! Now she feels like she has a malaria. After a while, she shouts to me: 'Marrying you is like jumping into a river. Hurry up and have a happy event! ’ So she came to urge me herself, and fixed the date of the wedding, but as the day approached, she was frightened again, or else she thought of something else,—God only knows, didn’t you see: crying, laughing, Shaking like a pendulum. As for her running away from you again, what's the mystery? She ran away from you again because she suddenly realized how much she loved you. She couldn't You stay there. You said I found her in Moscow, no—she came to me from you herself. She said: 'You make a date, I've got it! A glass of champagne! Let's go Get the gypsy girl!...'—she yelled!... She would have jumped into the river if it hadn't been for me, and I'm telling the truth. She probably didn't do it because I was scarier than water. She was She married me because she was ruthless... If she really married me, I'm sure she married me because she was ruthless..." “你怎么能……你怎么能……”公爵叫道，但是没把话说完，他惊惶地看着罗戈任。 “怎么不把话说完呀？”罗戈任龇牙咧嘴地接着说道，“要我把你这会儿心里想的东西说出来吗？你在想：'嗯，她现在怎么能嫁给他呢？怎么能让她走这一步棋呢？'你在想什么是明摆着的……” “我不是为了这个才到这里来的，帕尔芬，我敢说，我心里想的也不是这事……” “你不是为了这事才来的，想的也不是这事，这是可能的，不过你现在肯定是在想这事，嘿嘿！好啦，够啦！你干吗这么垂头丧气呢？你难道当真不知道这个吗？真叫我吃惊！” “这全是忌妒，帕尔芬，这全是病态，你把这一切都过分夸大了……”公爵异常激动地嘟囔道，“你倒是怎么啦？” “放下。”帕尔芬说，一把夺过公爵手里的小刀（这把小刀是公爵从桌上那本书旁顺手拿过来的），又放回原来的地方。 “我快到彼得堡的时候就仿佛知道，仿佛预感到……”公爵继续说，“我本来不想到这里来！我想把这里的一切都忘掉，把它们从心里连根拔掉！好，别了……你怎么啦？” 公爵说话的时候，心不在焉地又从桌上拿起那把小刀，罗戈任又从他手里把那小刀拿过来，扔到桌上。这小刀的形状很普通，刀柄是鹿角的，不是折刀，刀约三俄寸半长，刀宽也与之相当。 罗戈任看见公爵特别注意到他两次从他手里把刀夺过去的情形，就恼火地拿起刀子，夹进书里，把书扔到另一张桌上。 “你用它来裁书，是吗？”公爵问，但是他的神态有点恍惚，仿佛仍处在潜心沉思的重压下。 “对，裁书……” “这不是果园里用的刀子吗？” “是的，果园里用的。难道就不能用果园里用的刀子裁书吗？” “不过这刀……是全新的。” “嗯，新的又怎么样？难道我现在就不能买把新刀吗？”罗戈任越说越有气，终于狂怒地叫道。 公爵打了个哆嗦，定神看了看罗戈任。 “我们倒是怎么啦！”他忽然笑起来，完全清醒了过来，“对不起，老兄，当我像现在这样头重脚轻，而且这病……我变得越来越精神恍惚了，样子也十分可笑。我想问的完全不是这事……也不记得究竟想问什么了。别了……” “不是走这儿。”罗戈任说。 “忘了！” “走这儿，走这儿，走，我给你领路。”