Chapter 10 You must have the skill of indirect questioning in handling affairs

The power of speech is enormous, it can save the crisis and open the smooth door to a smooth road; it can even dominate the wind and clouds, one sentence is worth thousands of troops, it can overwhelm the river and sea, and have infinite courage. Everything is difficult at the beginning, and it is not easy to ask someone to do things, but if you master the skills and measure, the difficult things will become easy. 1. Use false words to tell the truth One of the principles of being a person is that honest people tell the truth, but straight guns may not be popular everywhere, especially sometimes even I don’t know whether what I am trying to tell is the truth, so what should I do?

Li Yan asked his good friend Director Zhao to do something for him, and suddenly heard that he was arrested and "went in", not knowing whether it was true or not, so he went to visit Director Zhao's house.Indeed, only the director's wife was at home, with a sad face.Li Yan asked, "Why isn't Lao Zhao at home?" Sure enough, Mrs. Zhao sighed, "Oh! I had another heart attack and was sent to the hospital yesterday..." That's how it is! If Li Yan asked the truth about Director Zhao whether he was really arrested, the scene would definitely be embarrassing.Li Yan imagined it this way: If Director Zhao was really arrested, his wife would naturally tell the truth.It can be switched freely between virtual and real, without being abrupt at all.

2. Tell the truth with light-hearted jokes The choice of topic is a very critical issue.Relaxed and humorous topics can often arouse emotional pleasure; solemn and serious topics can make people nervous and cautious.Whenever possible, it is best to speak about solemn and serious topics in a light-hearted and humorous manner, so that the other party may be more receptive. A young man who just graduated was working in a foreign-funded enterprise. In a relatively short period of time, he put forward rationalization suggestions twice in a row, which reduced production costs by 20% and 10% respectively.The boss of the foreign company was very satisfied with him and said to him: "Young man, work hard, I will not treat you badly."

Young people certainly know how much promise there is in this sentence.It could mean a lot, or it could be worth nothing.He wanted to get a definite answer, so he smiled easily and said, "I think you will put this sentence in my salary pocket." The foreign company boss smiled knowingly, and replied readily, "Yes, definitely will." Soon He got a big red envelope and salary increase reward! Faced with the boss's encouragement, if young people are not so playful, but sit down and ask for a salary increase seriously, and give a number of reasons, wouldn't it be a shame, or even counterproductive.

3. Talking must have the art of detours Sometimes, it seems embarrassing to say something by yourself. At this time, it is undoubtedly the best strategy to induce the other party to speak first. Huayu was going to start a business with the help of his friend Li Gang, but the day after he handed over a huge sum of money to Li Gang, Li Gang fell ill and died.Huayu immediately fell into a dilemma: if he asked for money, it would be too irritating to Li Gang's widow; if he didn't mention this matter, his own situation would be difficult to support. After helping with the funeral, Hua Yu said to Li Gang's wife: "I really didn't expect Brother Li to leave so early, and our cooperation just started. How about this, sister-in-law, you also know those related households of Brother Li, so you can Come forward and continue this business! Just tell me when you need me to run errands, I’m not afraid of hard work.”

In this way, Li Gang's wife comforted him in turn, saying: "This accident has caused you a loss in business, and I can't continue working. You should take the money back and find another opportunity." In this way, he had no intention of chasing money at all, and he was full of arrogance and loyalty. In fact, he knew that Li Gang's wife was incapable and had no desire to continue working.In the words, I added a clever reminder: I can only run errands and spend my energy, but I am not familiar with those outlets; 4. Speaking politely is the prerequisite for doing things

Since you need others to do things for you, you need to be polite when speaking, so what kind of propriety should you hold when talking to people? Say what you want to do in a negotiating tone, such as: "Can you get this done quickly?" Pretend that you are not sure, express your request, suggestion, etc., and leave sufficient retreat for the other party and yourself .Example: "You may not want to accept it, but I want you to think about it." When making suggestions to others, if you express in your words that they may not have the relevant conditions or willingness, then you will not force others to make things difficult, and you will appear to be very measured.Put forward some requirements first so that the other party can accept them smoothly, and then go deeper.We often find that when people make certain requests, they tend to make big things small. This is not to deceive the other party, but to appropriately reduce the psychological pressure on others, and at the same time make it easier for themselves to speak.

Humility is politeness, expressing relevant requests by elevating the other party and belittling oneself, appearing polite and respectful.For example: "Don't refuse when you are old, all the disciples are waiting for you!" The most traditional and effective way to ask others for help is to be as devout as possible, so that people feel respected and willing to obey.Sometimes you have to tell the difficulty of the problem before you do something, which makes people feel that you have to do it as a last resort, knowing that you should not say it but you have to say it.For example: "I really shouldn't disturb you at this time, but I really have no choice but to trouble you." "I know you don't have a lot of money, but I really have no choice but to borrow from you."

In reality, only a little art is needed to do things, the art of being able to speak well and touching people's hearts.In life, we need to ask people, we need to persuade people, and we need to maintain a harmonious relationship between people.Some people can't speak, and as a result, they always let themselves live in the tension and oppression that they can't move forward and backward freely, panting and frightened every day.Some people know the art of speaking and have a good mouth. If they are mediocre, this good mouth makes them outstanding, and if they are originally excellent, this good mouth makes them even better.