Chapter 10 08 Friends in the Closet (Part 2)

third day. It was already afternoon when my partner and I returned to the hotel after lunch. As soon as we got out of the elevator, we saw the boy and his father standing at the door of the room. After a brief exchange of pleasantries, the boy's father told us that the boy would stay here for a few hours and he would pick him up when the time came.It can be seen that his expression is a little surprised, because his son has not asked to go out for several years. After seeing the boy's father into the elevator, I went back to the room.At this time, the young man was flipping through a few books we brought on the table, looking around from time to time.His partner leaned against the window with his arms around his shoulders and looked at him.

Juvenile: "Reading is the best pastime during short trips, but now few people read books, and most of them take a portable video game console like an idiot." As he spoke, he curled his lips. Partner: "Everyone has different ways of pastime, you don't have to do that, but you have to accept the existence that is different from yourself." The boy nodded, dropped the book in his hand and went to the bedroom to take a look, then went back to the outside to look around. Partner: "Are you looking for the toilet? It's in the direction of the door." Boy: "No, I'm looking at you."

Partner: "What did you see?" The teenager shrugged: "You are a very good combination, very stable." Partner: "Why do you say that?" Juvenile: "Your personality looks extroverted, but in fact you are introverted, and your heart is more complicated. Your partner's personality is the opposite of yours, and he can calm you down with calmness, so when you face problems, you can Complementary. If you guessed right, your partner's composure can just make up for your confusion." Partner: "Am I confused?" The boy stared at him for a while, then continued to flip through the book: "Some aspects. For example, I can easily distinguish which book you are reading and which book your partner is reading. You must be the one who folded the footer randomly. , and your partner uses bookmarks. Interestingly, you never scribble key points or annotate anything in the book, and your partner is used to marking, so maybe that's it... I don't have a portable game console here Found it, it seems that you two are not idiots."

Partner: "There is no game console because we drove here, and it takes 4 hours to drive here." The boy curled his lips: "I think there are other reasons for this. For example, the TV remote control is placed on top of the TV. It looks very neat. It should be placed by the people in the hotel. You haven't turned it on since last night until this morning. Pass the TV." As he spoke, he pointed in the direction of the TV without raising his head. Partner: "How are you sure it wasn't the guy who cleaned the room while we were having lunch?" Teenager: "The cleaner will not leave the ashtray unemptied, nor will the two beds in it be messed up. So I said that you have not turned on the TV from last night to this morning. I can't be sure before yesterday, because the cleaner came."

Partner: "Well, you're right, we don't watch much TV." Teenager: "People who watch TV shows are also idiots." Partner: "This statement is too extreme." The boy dropped the book in his hand, opened the closet and looked up and down: "It's not that I went to extremes, it's really like that. The content of the TV program is fixed, and the acquisition of information is very passive, with no freedom at all—although it seems Degree of freedom: You can choose the channel, in fact, your choice is still within a certain range. I know that can't satisfy you."

Partner: "How do you know that TV shows can't satisfy me?" Teenager: "Your partner only brought one book, and you brought the rest. I noticed that those books are not of the same genre, they are in various fields. You have a wide range of interests. Prove your Wide range of knowledge. But I'm glad I didn't see Skull from the Sky, the one you saw at my place the other day." Partner: "Why?" Boy: "If you buy a book just because you saw that I've read it, to understand what it's about, and try to get to know me that way, it only proves that you're nothing but an idiot. Obviously, you're not."

Partner: "Thank you for the compliment." The young man closed the closet door, walked to the window and looked down: "I'm not complimenting you, I'm telling the truth... Looking down from here, the scenery is pretty good... By the way, there is one thing you did right." Partner: "Which point?" The boy looked straight at his partner calmly: "You didn't judge me as autistic or someone with Asperger's syndrome because of your subjective consciousness, and you didn't make any more assumptions about it at first. That's good, otherwise, once I find out that you have that kind of thinking, I will definitely play tricks and drive you away crying and laughing."

Partner: "Well, but we guessed on the way that you might have Asperger's syndrome." The boy shrugged, walked to the sofa and sat down, and looked at his palms: "Now? Haven't you thought that I might have something to do with savant syndrome?" Partner: "Impossible." Boy: "Why are you so sure?" Partner: "You can take care of yourself." The young man laughed loudly: "Hahaha! Well, this reason is enough. In fact, I can only remember in most cases. Maybe, plus the ability to integrate information? Some of the content in the book will be in my memory. Automatically correlate in my mind, and finally become a complete information-do you understand what I said? I will correlate all things-if they have a degree of correlation. So, many things don't need to be touched, I can know that it is Whatever happened, it's no big deal."

The partner nodded: "That's where your problem lies." Boy: "Question? For example?" Partner: "You know the theory of human social structure very well, but you haven't been in it to experience what it is like; you understand that love is the result of a chemical secretion, but you don't know how much it can bring you. Wonderful feelings; you can imagine the beautiful scenery, but you have not experienced the shock of witnessing; you have read history from books, but you can’t see the vicissitudes between the lines; you understand the profoundness of advanced mathematics, But you can't read the digital barrier that used to make people forget to eat and sleep; you have learned more than two languages, but you don't understand the connotation hidden in that rhythm; you understand what psychology is, but you haven't explored it Those complicated causes. Your cleverness allows you to imagine and draw many correct conclusions, but it is also your cleverness that makes you just stop at imagination.

"You have never experienced anything, you don't know what is cruelty, what is moving, what is enthusiasm, what is sadness, all you have is indifference. Your understanding of war is only some fragmentary vocabulary, bullets, political conspiracy, arms Merchant, troop establishment? You don’t know what it’s like to watch your comrades fall by your side and exhale their last breath; your understanding of the relationship between men and women is just other words, reproduction, hormones, adrenaline? But you don’t Understand that the moment that can make you fall in love can affect your future.

"You're just a kid, I bet you've never left the city. Most of the time you're within a radius of 10km, but your intelligence and talent allow you to put together the information you get through books and various sources , and use it to imagine a complete world, but are you sure that the real world is like that? It is confirmed without any verification? The reason why you don’t know what you want and can’t see your future is because your Everything stays on the concepts and conclusions you believe in. Other than that, you don’t know anything. Because of this, even the lies you make up are a standard pattern: the female ghost in white clothes persuades people to hang themselves, Only you can see it... But I must admit, you really only have friends in the closet - those books. Other than that, you have nothing. You even shut your heart and mind in a dark room , only need, and only be accompanied by friends in the closet. Are you reading? Have you read a lot? But do you understand?" The young man lay silently on the sofa, looking a little confused. Partner: "Just like I will not buy a book and try to understand you through it, you cannot understand me through any book, so it is even more impossible for you to truly understand the world through books. In nothing Before you do it, you can't understand how important "experience" is. You just know a little bit from the text. Speaking of this, I can understand your confusion. If it were me, I would also I will be at a loss, and I will be at a loss. You are still a child, and you have to go through too much, although you are very smart. "So far, your inferences about me are correct, but you don't know why I am like this, because you don't know how I got here, there are too many things in those memories that you can't imagine If you haven't experienced it, you won't understand what friendship is, what love is, what despair is, what shock is, and what helplessness is. Before you experience, they are just words, nothing more. "Maybe in your opinion, those books in your closet are your most sincere friends, but, I want to repeat, do you really understand? Do you know what your friends in your closet want to see most? ?” At this point, he paused and took a deep breath, “She hopes that you can walk out of that dark cabin in your heart without looking back, just leave.” The young man was stunned for a while before he spoke: "I admit, you have experienced more than me. I am indeed like what you said, and I haven't really touched anything. In fact, the gap between you and me is just this little." The partner nodded: "You are right, but you are not qualified to say this until you have experienced it." The boy bit his lower lip and thought for a while, but said nothing. No one spoke for the next ten minutes, and the three of us remained silent. Finally, the boy broke the silence: "Is it just so embarrassing? Can you say something? Or, hypnotize me? I haven't tried it yet." The partner shook his head. The teenager glanced at my mobile phone on the table: "There is still more than an hour before my dad picks me up." Partner: "Then we will sit for more than an hour." We literally sat in silence for over an hour until there was a knock on the door. Before leaving, the boy asked his partner, "Can I come tomorrow?" The partner nods. Boy: "Well... What if I still don't want to talk? Are we still sitting like this?" The partner still nodded. The teenager sighed, turned and left with his father. After watching the elevator doors close, I asked my partner: "Is it really going to be so silent tomorrow?" The partner took out a cigarette and lit it, opened the window in the corridor and looked out the window: "Yes." Me: "Uh...Actually, you've already convinced him, and you're only one step away." Partner: "But this step must be taken by himself, otherwise it is useless." Me: "Will he?" Partner: "Don't know, but he knows what to do because I've given him the keys." For the next two days, the teenager arrived as scheduled every afternoon, but we sat in silence for 3 hours every day without saying a word, and our partner even turned off his mobile phone.Although I really wanted to go out for a walk, I didn't want to miss any chance to see a turning point, so I had to stay in my room and read a book these two days without going anywhere. The turning point came when we were in the city for the sixth day. After the boy came this time, he sat for less than 5 minutes before he asked, "Are you married?" He asked me. I shake my head. The boy turned to his partner again: "You're not married, are you?" The partner nodded: "No." Boy: "Why aren't you married?" Partner: "Why should I get married?" Obviously, the young man was taken aback by this rhetorical question: "Huh? Uh... yes, why did you want to get married? Um... I think... yes... well, let's change the subject. Have you ever been in love?" Partner: "Of course." Teenager: "Have you ever done anything outrageous to the person you're in love with?" Partner: "Excessive things? What do you mean?" Teenager: "Uh, those that don't make sense..." Partner: "I still don't understand what you're referring to, but literally speaking, there shouldn't be any." Boy: "I did." Partner: "You mean you were in love?" Juvenile: "Actually not, I was only 5 years old at that time. I really like a teacher in the kindergarten. Every time I see her, I will rush to hug her leg." Partner suppresses a laugh: "But you don't understand what that means, it's just an impulsive act, right?" Teenager: "Yes, a very primitive impulse. That beautiful teacher didn't have any special reaction to my performance. Every time she would tear me off her leg very patiently like tearing off a piece of plaster." The partner laughed: "Are you hugging so tightly?" The teenager was also laughing: "It's very tight. Because I was disappointed that she didn't have any surprise performance, so once I decided to make something for her to praise me." Partner: "What did you do?" The boy tried his best to hold back his snort and insisted on finishing the speech: "I rubbed a big puddle of snot on her thigh." His partner smiled and asked him, "Why do you think you'll be praised for doing that?" Teenager: "Because I once wiped my snot on a handkerchief of my mother and was praised by my mother, and the color of the kindergarten teacher's skirt was very similar to the handkerchief that day!" All three of us couldn't help laughing. After laughing enough, the partner asked: "Did that teacher let you hug her thigh again later?" Juvenile: "Of course not, not only that, since then, every time she sees me, if there is enough space, she will take me as the center point and circle a circle with a radius of more than two meters." The partner smiled and nodded: "Understandable." Teenager: "But I didn't understand why for a few years, I think I did a good job..." He smiled and shook his head, "Of course, I understood later." Partner: "Have you ever been in love after you figured out the things about men and women?" Teenager: "No, I haven't been out of the house since I was 13 years old, and the two times when I moved are not counted. You can't imagine how surprised my parents were when they heard from me that I was coming to see you. Mention When it comes to you, my mother even takes a pious attitude." Partner: "It sounds like you're enjoying yourself?" Boy: "No, I just think it's funny." Partner: "Why?" Teenager: "I'm just here to meet friends and they're just... uh... I mean friends? Well, friends." The partner smiled and nodded. Juvenile: "I understand now that communication is indeed a very interesting thing. Being able to have the same level of thinking but different modes is much more fun than I thought." Partner: "What else?" Boy: "Well...you know, I haven't tried this situation too much, so I can't say it clearly, but I feel very satisfied. Are you proud of it?" Partner: "Did you see it from my expression?" The boy shrugged: "No." Partner: "So I'm not complacent." Boy: "Then how do you feel now?" The partner thought for a while: "When I express my feelings, it may give you the illusion of 'this guy is triumphant', but I'm sure it's not. I seem to be talking to myself from years ago." Boy: "Really?" Partner: "Of course, with your observation skills, I can't fool you." Boy: "Well, it's like I can't lie in front of you, and that's one of the reasons why I find you interesting." The partner nodded, still smiling. Juvenile: "Then, what are you proficient in? As I said, I can remember most of the books I read, why I don't know why. Besides, I can also connect those seemingly irrelevant things Together. What about you?" Partner: "I don't have any amazing talents." Boy: "Impossible, if that's the case, I wouldn't find you interesting, there must be something special about you. Don't hide it, just tell me." The partner tilted his head and thought for a while: "In my opinion, the text has a strong sense of the scene, even if it is a boring theory or mathematical formula." Boy: "Cool! Is there any more?" Partner: "I can also remember a lot of content, but I don't remember all the words like you. What I remember is the scene formed by the words in my mind, maybe a very abstract pattern." Boy: "Interesting, I'll try to see if I can do this later...it seems more efficient, right? I mean coding." Partner: "Yes, this way you don't need to memorize very complicated things, you just need to code the information in an elemental form." Boy: "And those codes are the basic elements, they won't interfere with the information itself, and at the same time they can be split... well, it's really a very efficient way! How did you find it?" Partner: "I don't know, I even forgot since when I did that." The young man nodded thoughtfully: "I can learn from this... By the way, if you want to smoke, don't hold back, I don't care." The partner looked at him: "No, I don't want to now." The teenager paused for a moment: "Uh...I can't think of what to say again...Can I ask something?" Partner: "For example?" Teenager: "Are you doing this because of interest or do you think there is something wrong with you?" Partner: "The latter." Boy: "Insecure?" Partner: "Yes, how do you know?" Juvenile: "You never sit with your back to the window or the door. This should be a behavioral trace left over from psychological problems, right?" The partner nodded: "You are right." Boy: "I don't care about that." Partner: "You care about people." Boy: "Are we exchanging secrets?" Partner: "No, no equivalent exchange is required, this is not alchemy." The boy grinned and nodded: "Well, I admit, I care more about people." Partner: "Your parents don't know your dissatisfaction with them, do they?" The boy froze for a moment: "You...how did you find out..." Partner: "Because, you must know that your parents are very anxious about your current state, but you have never apologized for your own behavior, and you will even be very happy because you played them around." The boy's face became gloomy: "I..." Partner: "They were proud of you, weren't they?" The teenager nodded. Partner: "So is your teacher, right?" Boy: "Yes..." Partner: "Do you like your elementary school teacher better?" Boy: "Yes." Partner: "Because they never push you for anything?" Boy: "Yes." Partner: "Have you ever thought about why?" Boy: "I... haven't thought about it." Partner: "Your primary school teachers treat you like a child, and even if you surprise them with what you're doing, they'll think you're a child." The teenager nodded. Partner: "But everything changes in middle school. Although you are very favored by those teachers, they don't treat you like primary school teachers anymore. They even ask you to bear some pressure that only adults face. .Is that so?" Teenager: "Well... since I was in middle school, I have been participating in all kinds of competitions, some of which are boring. Those teachers and the principal don't even ask me if I am interested. They just compete with my dad. Let's talk, and then we'll make a decision." Partner: "Have you protested?" Boy: "Yes." Partner: "The result?" Teenager: "My parents told me that this is the love and expectation of the whole school for me, and it is also an opportunity to win glory for the school. They will be proud of me." The partner is appropriately silent and waits. Boy: "During that one year or so, I can't remember how many boring rubbish I recited, how many mysterious math problems I solved, and how many lying compositions I wrote. I really can't write any more. I plagiarized and pieced together my memories, but everyone praised me for my good writing, and those idiot classmates also expressed how envious they were. That is, from then on, they all began to alienate me. After school, I always stayed alone. In the teacher's office, all the teachers treated me as if they were watching rare animals. Even if I like chocolate, they would rush to buy the brand I ate, as if eating it would instantly improve my IQ... It's all a bunch of idiots. "Next, they put forward more demands on me, not letting me read books, not letting me do what I like, but they asked me to give them something more refreshing, how could this be possible! I have no friends, no Entertainment, I don’t have a game console, I don’t know how to play basketball, I don’t know the rules of football, I don’t know what online games are! In the eyes of everyone, I’m just a machine with a long-term memory. I even once held up a sanitary napkin that someone had stuffed into my desk in front of the whole class and asked 'what is this'! Watching them laugh, I wanted to kill them all! And when I When I told the teacher all this, they actually started laughing, and when they laughed enough, they told me that I just need to study hard, and I don’t have to worry about anything else, I have an immeasurable future, and I’m a genius! Then they asked me to Keep reading those damn reference books, doing damn papers. Also asking me to have creative solutions! However, I feel like I lived like a laboratory animal during that time, but no one sympathized with me, no one comforted me , nobody even really cared about me, nobody! No fucking one!" The partner walked up to him and squatted down, staring at him: "This is not your problem, all this is not your problem..." The teenager raised his head and sobbed: "I'd rather be an idiot!" The partner patted him on the back: "Believe me, it's really not your fault." The boy tried his best not to let his emotions explode: "What should I do? I really don't want to be a fucking genius, how can I not have this ability!" Partner: "I know, I understand, none of this is your fault." Although the boy bit his lip and tried to endure, I could see tears gathering more and more in his eye sockets. The partner stared him in the eyes: "There's nothing wrong with you, and you're just a kid." The boy couldn't bear it anymore, leaned on his partner's shoulder and cried hoarsely: "They cut off my wings! But they want me to fly again!" He cried heart-piercingly, presumptuously and willfully. It's what we've all been waiting for—that kid is back. the seventh day. The teenager smiled and said to his partner, "My mother held me and cried most of the night." The partner also laughed: "Didn't you sleep well?" Boy: "Well, our whole family didn't sleep well all night." Partner: "How do you know?" Teenager: "I listened to my parents chatting in their bedroom until dawn." Partner: "Didn't you remind them not to read the contract when paying today, but to pay more?" The teenager laughed: "No, I won't tell them that." After laughing enough, he stopped and looked at his partner, "I will pay you when I have the financial ability." The partner smiled and shook his head: "I'm just kidding." Boy: "Uh...Me too..." partner:"……" The boy glanced at the few pieces of luggage we packed: "Well... are you leaving tonight or tomorrow?" Partner: "I'll take you back in the afternoon, collect the money and leave." Teenager: "Do you feel sorry for the room fee?" Partner: "No, take the money and run away before things take a turn for the worse." The boy couldn't help laughing again: "You are the most undisguised person about money I have ever met." Partner: "I follow the principle of 'what you pay, what you pay for'." Teenager: "Am I being tricky?" The partner thought for a while: "But it's worth it." Boy: "Stay here for dinner? My parents will definitely insist." Partner: "There are other things to do tomorrow, so you will speak for us later." Boy: "Well, well, I see...and, that..." Partner: "What?" Boy: "Can I visit you during the holidays?" Partner: "You'd better ask them for permission." Boy: "Well, I will...thank you." The partner nodded: "I accept, but I want to remind you: If there is no hypnotist temporarily teaching me some in-depth guidance skills, I am afraid there will be no results for another week." The boy turned to me: "Thank you too." I nodded in response. Boy: "Actually, you don't know, do you? At first I always thought you were the mastermind behind the scenes, and he was just the mouthpiece." I smiled and glanced at my partner. Boy: "If there is a chance, I would like to try hypnosis." Me: "I'm afraid it will be difficult." Boy: "Really? Why?" He turned to his partner. Partner: "Because you're likely to laugh." The young man thought for a while: "It's possible... Then I won't insist. Will you teach me psychology if you have the chance?" Partner: "I can teach you how to play games." Boy: "You will?" Partner: "Of course!" The boy showed a relaxed smile: "OK, then we can make an agreement." After the car drove onto the highway, the partner let out a long breath. Me: "Why do you feel relieved?" Partner: "I can't say what it feels like, I can't describe it." Me: "You said that he is very similar to you once." Partner: "Generally." Me: "Have you ever pretended to be a ghost?" The partner held the steering wheel and smiled, but said nothing. Me: "What did you do back then?" His expression was a little serious: "The problem I am facing is more serious." Me: "For example?" The partner sighed: "When I was his age, I fell in love with a girl." Me: "Puppy love?" Partner: "Yes." Me: "What's the result?" The partner frowned: "There is no result." Me: "I mean after becoming an adult." He shook his head. Me: "I thought according to your personality, you would stick to your choice..." Partner: "Some reasons are irresistible." Me: "You mean breaking up with that girl?" Partner: "Yes." Me: "Is it pressure from both parents?" Partner: "It's more serious than that." Me: "You won't give someone to..." Partner: "Of course not!" Me: "What's the reason?" Partner: "Because we are actually long-lost brother and sister!" I froze for a moment, then turned to look at him, only to find that he was laughing so hard that he could hardly hold the steering wheel steady. I swear. After laughing enough, my partner asked me: "Do you want to hear about my real first love?" I lit a cigarette and looked out the window, and without turning my head, I "returned" a word: "Get out!"