Chapter 5 Yangjin character

People with a golden personality who are quick-witted, lively, and eloquent will be very popular with others.Even a Yinjin person has good popularity, but his kind of popularity is maintained by hypocrisy, and it won't last long.People with yang-gold nature have a tactful temperament, are willing to do good deeds, act chivalrously, and form good karma. This is what we often call "loyalty". Loyalty is a good state of mind.A loyal person, in the eyes of people, is a very simple, cheerful, and humane person. He can see the strengths of others at a glance. Since others are good, he will be better, so everyone It's easy to be buddies together.Unlike some people who are full of scheming, when they see a person, they repeatedly think about whether it is good or not, and they complain from time to time, even an eye for an eye, and an eye for an eye. ?Even if other people make mistakes, Yangjin people will think: "Who is not wrong? It's not surprising, it doesn't matter." Turning his head, he looks at the merits of others.

One editor I know is a typical Yangjin character.For the same article, he read the draft and then the revised draft.He would say: "The manuscript you gave me for the second time is very good, ten times better than the first one!" Not good, he didn't say bad.I noticed that he was addicted to smoking, and when he was talking happily, he would light up a cigarette unconsciously, and he finished smoking in a blink of an eye, and another one after a while.Most people who smoked like him would have coughed and even got bronchitis, but he didn't.Because he can see the benefits of others, the good medicine of "loyalty" is always nourishing his lung system that has been smoky!

Why?Because this kind of mentality can make a person's whole body unobstructed, and there is no place to hold his breath.People with a Yangjin personality not only have unobstructed energy inside their bodies, but they also have a lot of money outside them. People who talk about loyalty must be very generous with property.They often say, "Money is like dung, and benevolence and righteousness are worth thousands of gold."I will take what others give me; I will give what others need. This is a manifestation of loyalty.Some people are very cautious. When others give them things or money, they dare not take them, for fear that they will not be able to repay them if they receive them, or even fear that there are some additional conditions or that it will hurt their face.In fact, such people rarely give charity to others.He is completely a pool of stagnant water, never daring to let living water flow in and out, and always secretly taking advantage of it, but he is ashamed, this kind of person will never be righteous no matter what.Therefore, a loyal person dares to accept the kindness of others, and he himself is always ready to help others and give his good things to others at any time, never caring about his own gains and losses.Such a person must be welcomed by everyone wherever he goes, and he doesn't have to worry about running out of money, let alone stealing it.He is a mouthful of living water, with countless streams coming in and out, so afraid of running out of water?

Giving is to give what is one's own to others without hesitation.This can cultivate loyalty and overcome greed and miserliness.In the process of giving, Yangjin's character is ready: we are not jealous or picky, as long as we have good things, we are willing to share them with others or give them to those who need them more. In theory, this is easy to understand.But in reality, it is very difficult to do.A few years ago, a tsunami occurred in Southeast Asia and caused heavy losses. Domestic organizations launched relief fundraising activities.Immediately some people objected, saying that there are still many people in our country who are poor and suffering, that Southeast Asian countries are not short of money at all, and do not care about our little help; they even say that the Chinese are swollen to pretend to be fat.In fact, for this kind of thing, we have to learn to discover its benefits: at least, this kind of activity cultivates our righteousness through giving.Whether people need charity or not is their business. Whether we have sympathy or willingness to donate is our business. As for the fact that there are still many poor people in our country, that is another matter, and we need to make other donations.

On the street, we see beggars, they are very pitiful, do they have the heart of giving?Ordinary people don’t have any, they would say: “Those beggars are actually richer than me.” They also cited some news reports that some beggars begged hundreds of thousands a year, and they built small western-style buildings at home.Of course, there are such cases. For example, when I was in college, I saw three beggars accidentally walking together at the east gate of the school. They were almost carved out of the same mold. Bowls and sticks greeted each other when they met.Of course, there is no need to give alms when we see this kind of person, but among the many beggars, there are always some people who really need help. How can we blindly doubt whether they are "real beggars" and give up giving alms?After all, the beneficiaries of giving are not only others, but also ourselves.

Of course, almsgiving is not just about giving something to someone who is poor.The more advanced kind of giving is to take out your best things and share them with others.This is the most testing thing.Give someone else to drive the new car you just bought, and take out the money saved at home for everyone to use together. Most people can't do it, and they can't bear it!But if you do, the benefits to you are immeasurable.There is a secret to getting rich abroad: no matter how much your income is, you must donate half of your income in different forms.This secret is very simple and easy to do, but there are too few people who are willing to do it, and none of those who have done it have not become rich.This is generosity. It has a miraculous effect on exercising one's character and changing one's destiny.So, in fact, the beneficiary of almsgiving is the giver himself.As for why this is, it cannot be explained in words, let us experience it slowly in our own actions.

It is precisely for this purpose that the monk Huazhai.Some people say that monastics benefit all beings all the time, everywhere, and with all their hearts and minds. Are they also benefiting all beings by begging for food?of course!They beg for food from people, which is called begging, to provide people with a chance to give generously, and to form a relationship with you!This is also to let people benefit themselves through the act of giving.If you can't see the benefits of seeing this matter, you won't get that kind of loyalty and fate, and it will only increase your troubles. 45-60 years old is the best period to cultivate Yangjin character.I have gone through a carefree childhood and adolescence stage, and then I have gone through a youth stage of studying hard and pursuing success.From the age of 45, it is like the earth has reached the harvest season, and it finally bears fruit.At this time, the career is in full swing, there is no need to work so hard for money and work, and the children in the family have grown up, saving a lot of worry and worry.So what do people need most at this time?Yangjin's personality is mainly restrained. At this time, you don't have to be exhausted and busy with socializing, but pay more attention to your body and health, so as to lay a solid foundation for your life in old age.

The so-called restraint, one is to give more space for young people to develop in their careers.After all, age is a very real issue, and you can't hold on to your seat all the time.At this time, it is necessary to start giving young people some opportunities to train them, and you don't have to do everything yourself.The second is to learn to decompress yourself.Many people have been working hard, but at this stage they still have not succeeded.Most of them will have some emotion that "everything can be done in middle age".But this "Xiu", rather than pessimistically understanding that there is no chance of success, it is better to understand that since you have worked so hard for so many years, it is better to take good care of your body while you are not too old.At this age, there is no need to think about making a "last fight", because at this age, the chance of success is even smaller.Instead of struggling with little chance of winning, it is better to calm down, cultivate your temperament, and create a healthy and happy old age for yourself.

Yang Jin has a loyal character and is not jealous.At this stage, the vigor of his youth has almost faded away, but Yang Jin's good point is that he will restrain his external vigor inwardly.At this age, if you have money, I suggest you do more charity and do public welfare work; if you don’t have money, don’t be jealous. It’s useless to be jealous. On the contrary, it affects your mood and hurts your body. Why bother? ? A professor I know started planning for his retirement when he was in his fifties.He reduced his own subjects, put more energy on training students, and used the past few years to train several outstanding young teachers, and even went to learn how to drive with his wife.He would always joke that our old bones have to go, tomorrow still belongs to you young people!The old man is open-minded and casual.I like to smoke, and I also like to have a drink.He said that there is no need to live so tired, you will be tired all your life, what's the point, you should enjoy life.

By the time he retires, the young people he trained are already able to take care of themselves, and everything in the institute is in order; now he and his wife occasionally stay at their children's house for a while, and when they have free time, the two of them drive a car and travel around .When I usually meet, the cheerful laughter is still the same as before. People in their 60s are still in good health. People are always afraid of being lonely, afraid of being forgotten, and afraid of losing their present glory.But think about it, life is not the same as the four seasons. Only when there is sowing can there be harvest, but there will also be winter.Thinking pessimistically, winter is barren, but don’t many plants preserve their lives and accumulate their energy in winter, hoping to germinate and bloom next spring?Since it is such a reincarnation, then at the age of 45-60 in life, one should enjoy the joy of harvest and prepare for the winter and, of course, the next spring.

In a family, especially that kind of big family, there are many people and complicated affairs, and it is even more necessary for family members to understand each other.In a family, the elder is earth, the parent is fire, the eldest son is wood, the mistress is water, and everyone else is metal.Those who belong to gold are often the second son or daughter in the family. In the big family in the past, there would be more people in the gold position.People who are in the golden position of a family need Yangjin character the most. I have a classmate who is a strong woman. After graduation, she quickly opened up her career and achieved great success.She is a very kind person and takes care of her family very much. She feels that if she is capable, she should take care of her family more.She used the money to buy a house for her younger brother, and also helped him marry a wife and started a family.She feels that she is very competent as a sister.But later, not only did her brother not live a good life and be promising as she wished, but he got into a lawsuit instead.When she told me about this incident, she always complained about how her brother was not promising.I told her, "Your brother can't be blamed for this. You should also bear some responsibility. What you have done is a typical Jin Kemu." In a family, the eldest son is Muwei, and the hope of the family needs to cultivate his independent, caring, assertive Yangmu character.But as the eldest son, if his younger siblings are promising, he will be under a lot of pressure.This aspect is a good thing, a slight pressure can make people have a sense of urgency and dare not slack off.But this kind of pressure should not be too much. If people on the gold position are too publicized and compete for the position of the eldest son in the family, then it will either cause too much pressure on the eldest son in the family, or make the eldest son no longer self-reliant and become dependent.If this is the case, it is Jin Kemu, which has caused too much pressure on the people in the wooden position.Therefore, in a family, family members who are in the golden position, such as the daughter and the second son, need to restrain themselves.Of course, this restraint is relative, it just means restraint at home, and don't put too much pressure on the eldest son.Outside, you can still indulge yourself. For my classmate, she is the elder sister, who is in the golden position, while her younger brother is still the eldest son of the family even though he is younger.The eldest son should have a wooden character and should be able to stand on his own.But the elder sister who is on the gold position is not only more successful than her younger brother, but now she has to come over and take care of all the younger brother's affairs.This is gold over wood, which means that you have surpassed your own gold position and encroached on the eldest son's wooden position.My friend was also really wronged. She said that I was not doing it for his own good. I worked so hard myself, buying him a house and helping him find a wife, because I was afraid that he would be worthless and unable to do anything. I also understand her heart.But as an older sister, you can't do everything for your younger brother and replace him as the eldest son in the family. Instead, you have to work hard to coordinate the relationship between the family and cultivate his self-reliance. This is the real way to help him. Here are some other golden qualities needed to be in a gold position.People on the golden position need to be lively, considerate, adjust the relationship between family members by ear, and avoid barbed words and sowing discord.Just as in a family, it is not enough to have a sensible head and an independent eldest son.If other members of the family do not support them and help them, but instead stir up dissension, the family will not be stable.If the person in the golden position can be considerate, adjust the relationship between family members, and be considerate in terms of human relations, then the eldest son in the family will keep his position, and the family will definitely be stable and harmonious.