Chapter 16 3. A China where trendsetters and reckless co-exist - Memorandum of the same generation

Reform is not only an act of man to transform the times, but also a measure of the times to transform people.As far as the era is concerned, people are actually divided into four categories—those who promote it, those who conform to it, those who resist it or those who are abandoned by it.It is not only Prometheus, but also the "Merchant of Venice" who promote it-they are the two rows of wheels on the giant ride of the age, and the age has never been a monorail train. Those who end the old age are heroes, those who resist the new age are madmen, and those who stand in between are idealists.Ages have produced roughly equal numbers of heroes and madmen, and never more idealists than both combined.

Idealists are those who praise roses and say, "If only there were no thorns!" Idealists are a mere by-product of appreciation that has ever existed in any age. Those who are abandoned by the times are often those who have completely pawned themselves to yesterday and completely lost their desire to redeem themselves.The times abandon them like a traveler throws away his worn-out shoes without hesitation. On the contrary, no age can ever get rid of those who know how to make the most of it - even if they are extremely greedy people.No matter how frequently the ox tail is swung, it cannot drive away the blood-eating gadflies trying to bite it.

Reform is not a group spring outing or sightseeing, and the fun in the process must be less than impetuous. In the animal kingdom, the future will in many ways be the same as the past.The honeycomb of thousands of years ago was constructed equally perfectly as the honeycomb of today, and the bees of a thousand years from now may still construct the same hexagon.And for humans, the future will be different from the past in many ways.Although man's lifespan is many times longer than that of a bee, man is not willing to build the same thing for three consecutive generations.So man has histories, but bees have only traditions.

Between eras, we see batch after batch of bodies crushed by sudden turning forces. May future generations, when they study such "specimens," find fewer that can be attributed to my contemporaries than I predict today. The huge body of the whale stood upright on the surface of the sea, and then slammed down violently. This spectacular situation resembled the turning point of the times, so some adsorbing creatures were lost, and even their limbs were broken. The whale then swims to wider seas. Therefore, this article is written for you, for him, for her, for myself, and a reflection for all of us.

Human: Give me fairness! TIME: What's that? Person: Everything like everyone else! Times: Which "others" have you been like? cold. Shuxing is frozen in the sky.The owl froze in a tree.There is no village in front and no shop in back.The wilderness on both sides of the highway was breathlessly silent.In the silence, the severe cold tried to freeze everything between the sky and the earth.The bare branches of those trees are like the skinned and exposed nerves of the world, and they are frozen to death and printed on the cold negative of the night.That owl bird seemed to have been perched on the tree for ten thousand years. It had never stretched its paws or made a cry, and its green eyes had been wide open for ten thousand years.

"Wu Zhenhai, I stabbed you!" "Don't mess around! Don't..." "You fucking let me go! I'm going to stab him today!  …" The roar of people is full of despair. The owl looked down, its green eyes gleaming with schadenfreude. The northwest wind howled, as if a group of soldiers whistled neatly. You can hear the crackling of tree bark. The nerves of the world were trembling. The coldest night in the northern winter has not been felt by many people, and it has not left many people with special memories. At that moment, you, me, him, and she were all sleeping soundly under the blanket.The severe cold poses only a threat to very few people and animals at night.

The year was 1998.On the Ha-Shuang (Harbin-Shuangyashan) highway, two overdue and obviously overloaded trucks were lying on the side of the highway.The carriages were filled with coal.This is a "pour coal" operation.It was also a "unlucky" operation.All the way, stop and go, stop and go, constantly being interrogated, fined, and ripped off. One of the "unlucky" men because of "dumping coal", tall, thin, long face lacks three-dimensionality, the lines on the face are as random as sketches, without any characteristics, so it seems to have some characteristics.The only thing that made a strong impression were the eyes, whose smallness made the face look sparse.Ordinarily, they always flash enthusiastic, confident, and sometimes even suspiciously conceited eyes. When they look at you quietly, they seem to be asking you-tell me something new!Tell me how other people my age live?Show me a way to get rich, or become famous!I will never forget your kindness of guidance...

At that time, they—the eyes of the man who was "unlucky" because of "dumping coal"—were full of frustration and anxiety, and there was an unknown fire burning from the bottom of his heart.If you can picture a bear after he has licked a lot of mustard, it's not hard to imagine what he looked like then.A bear, of course, not a monkey, leopard or liger.After a monkey is stimulated by pungent stimulation, its expression is richer and exaggerated than that of a human face, and a beast will undoubtedly jump and growl under the same situation; only a bear, you can hardly see that it has just licked Wasabi or honey, the external performance of the bear at the most sexy time and at the most embarrassing time is nothing more than circling in circles without stopping.

He had already circled the two trucks countless times—the problem was two small parts, roughly equivalent to bicycle valve cores.At this time, due to the severe cold, the truck could not start at all. The two drivers were hired by him, and the car was rented by him separately.The two drivers kept cursing and cursing. One of the drivers stared at him angrily, opened the car door and yelled at him: "What the hell are you babbling around?!" He looked at the other party, didn't say anything, took out a cigarette and offered it to the other party, and struck a match for the other party.

He knew that now he was forbidden even to circle the truck.Although it's useless to go around, he wants to curse people more if he doesn't go around. There was a bit of begging in his eyes, the wronged bear often looked at the animal trainer with such a look. This man is very tolerant.Very tolerant.Very tolerant.As long as he thinks it is necessary to endure, then all the humiliation, all the injustice, all the embarrassment, all the bitterness and sourness, all the two thin lips are pressed together, and he will bear it all.At least that's what he was back then. Sadness filled his heart.On the day before the Spring Festival, he missed his son very much, and he always wanted to show his son a good life.And when his son was killed by leukemia, it was when he was even more downcast than now...

At last it was getting light.Finally, there was a vehicle heading towards Harbin—the first vehicle was not stopped; the second vehicle was not stopped; the third vehicle was not stopped, and it was useless to pay.As long as it is a car driving from Shuangya Mountain to Harbin, there is no one that can squeeze another person.He was half dead from the cold, and two drivers, unable to bear to stand by, stopped a truck with frozen meat on its way from Harbin to Shuangyashan.He stuffed the other party with 20 yuan, and the other party's expression that was about to explode calmed down—"Get in the car." "Master, thank you!" "No thanks. Go later! There is an acquaintance waiting on the road ahead!" Half alive and half dead from the cold, he was pushed and lifted into another truck by two drivers, and he huddled in the gap between the truck full of frozen meat. In Shuangyashan, he got on the train with a platform ticket.When he arrived in Harbin, he ran around non-stop to buy two small auto parts.After buying it, I didn't go home to drink a sip of water, and got on the train back to Shuangyashan with a platform ticket.After getting off the train, I paid another 20 yuan and sat in the compartment of another truck.The difference is that this truck also "dumped coal", but it was not as "unlucky" as him.The northwest wind rolled snow and coal dust, sweeping his face in waves. Ten years later, he told me that he cried bitterly on someone else's coal car, like an orphan abandoned by his parents... He is my middle school classmate, named Wu Zhenhai. His experience was very different from mine. In 1968, I went to the countryside as the second batch of volunteers of the school; because he was the eldest son, his father died and he took care of Liucheng, so he "parted ways" with most of our generation.He is a "fish that slipped through the net" of the "going to the mountains and going to the countryside" movement.This is a fluke, but it is not a "lucky star" for him.He is the son of the lowest level of citizens, he is a child who grew up in a large courtyard, without red smoke to protect his left, and no purple light to protect his right.The city didn't favor him just because he was lucky enough to stay with it.The city gave him a job - 18 yuan a month, starting as an apprentice. Three years later, he can earn 32 yuan a month, and he will be included in the ranks of the working class by the city as usual.This means that when he retires, he may be able to earn more than 80 yuan a month.That is the highest salary a worker can hope for—the salary of an eighth-grade worker, which is equivalent to a cadre who has reached the level of section chief, provided that he is considered a good worker.He obviously didn't intend to follow the example of those who came over, so he couldn't be considered a good worker.The result was that by 1981, he was no longer a member of the workforce, as we used to say back then—no “official” work. Formal work - the most typical Chinese.In those days, a Chinese without a formal job, no matter how smart his mind was and how strong his body was, seemed incapable of being a fully qualified person at the very least.Almost no pair of Chinese parents willingly agrees to their daughter marrying a man who does not have a formal job.One of the conditions for today's girls to choose a mate is to be over 1.7 meters tall, and men under 1.7 meters are said to be called "semi-disabled" by them.Back then, a man without a formal job was equivalent to a semi-disabled man, not just semi-disabled! "This person does not have a formal job" - This statement contains a lot of content that is better than words.Only those who do not have a formal job associate with those who do not have a formal job. Those who have a formal job generally disdain to associate with those who do not have a formal job. Only women who do not have a formal job are willing to marry a man who does not have a formal job.Not having a formal job is like not having a "red" component.People without a formal job, in the city's social coordinate system, are first and foremost "subordinates", followed by "good guys" or "bad guys".A person without a formal job, male or female, wants to be recognized as a good person, like a duck wants to be appreciated.And formal work = state-owned enterprises and institutions ≈ large collective enterprises and institutions.This point is like the "upper class" and "middle" citizen badges established by society. Only by wearing this badge can one be entitled to enjoy various "advantages" of society - housing, labor security, public medical care, etc. China's experience in taxonomy back then was enough to be proud of the world.Our ancestors once said, "Three hundred and sixty lines, one line is the number one". Since the founding of the People's Republic of China, compatriots have found that they are not faced with so many careers to choose from, and they have even shrunk ten times. OK" is more than enough.Primary school teachers, without exception, explain in class—"Three hundred and sixty lines is an exaggerated metaphor..." At the same time, in the world, especially in some developed countries, modern people are facing the increasingly rapid division of labor. With more and more detailed and rich choices, hesitation and confusion, a foreigner may change several occupations in his life.In China before the reform and opening up, if you faced a person who had been transferred, you couldn't help but look at him with admiration.Because that means he is "very well connected" and "very capable", and probably not a "normal guy". China's traditional economic system, with its conceptualization and dogmatization of theories, and its rebellion against the general trend of global economic development, that is, world marketization, and its simplification and volitionalization of practice, make the understanding contemporary Economists scratched their heads in bewilderment. This situation lasted until the last year of the 1970s and the first year of the 1980s.In Beijing, Shanghai, Tianjin, Harbin, and many big cities in China, from east to west, from north to south, we have seen scenes of urban drama performances with a sense of pathos, laying the groundwork for "black humor" - work!Work! !Work! ! !State run!State run! !State run! ! !formal!formal! !formal! ! ! The eldest sons and daughters of the Republic finally ended the 10-year "baptism" - "re-education".They were all exhausted and returned to the city with nothing.In every city back then, you would distinguish them from the crowd at a glance by the special expressions on their faces and the special backs. how?Starved after birth, "revolutionized" when I went to school, and went to the countryside when it was time to work. Now I am in my thirties, a girl is not a girl, and a daughter-in-law is not a daughter-in-law. I don't know what kind of experience it is to have a home.Are you not even given a job now?State-owned, of course!Formal of course!Is it official if it is not state-run? ! They panic.The city is also panicking.It accommodated them in a panic, but there weren't many state-run ones, not many official ones, enough to accommodate them.There are still a few batches who have not been admitted to college!Aren't the palms of the hands and the back of the hands the sons and daughters of the city's "mother"?City, you want a bowl of water to be level! how? ——You are young, can't you develop a little style? how? ——You were credited with the "rebellion" back then, but have you become capital? For the sake of work, this group of sons and daughters in the city and that group of sons and daughters hate each other, as if they think each other is superfluous, as if they have been seriously violated by the other party's most fundamental interests. Wu Zhenhai watched these dramas with cold eyes back then—he had a formal job, but he voluntarily gave it up. Work, this big event for everyone, is so big that "everything is the only thing that matters".Nobody taught this, real life made it clear. Work!Work! !Work! ! ! State run!State run! !State run! ! ! Good or better jobs are always available in any age. As a result, the values ​​of a generation were guided to the traditional "tunnel". For a job with a "National" brand name, for the work permit of such a unit, for the work clothes of such a unit, those who were rejected by it The contemporaries, exactly how painstaking, how persevering, how dreamy, and how all kinds of methods are used to achieve their goals, will not give up, and they will not die with peace of mind, only you know, and the sadness is beyond words. Wu Zhenhai watched these dramas with cold eyes back then—he had had their plans; he had used their methods; he had obtained what they dreamed of; He has also experienced the sense of peace and stability that can be taken for a lifetime, and he has really sucked that kind of consolation himself, just like a baby sucking its own fingers with relish. But he resolutely gave up. Missionaries from the West who have a long way to go go to Africa to preach, saying: "Believe in God, he will guide you to the way to heaven." The black said: "No, we haven't even found our way to the world yet." But when they believed in God, the Holy See couldn't spend so much money to build churches for them, and, as the plenipotentiary agent of God, announced to them that God was also divided into white and black... A generation of people who can't wear the work clothes of a state-owned unit - and there were a lot of them back then - feel being played again, just as black people who believe in God can't psychologically balance themselves to accept that they are only worthy of kissing informal "official" crosses Same. But if you wear it, you will get tired of wearing it in the next two or three years.They began to painstakingly want to take it off, and their desire was no less urgent and strong than they wanted to put it on.They began to pay attention to who in the unit and in which offices of the system had retired or was about to retire, was transferred or was about to be transferred, died of illness or was about to die, added or was about to add a person... When fortunate enough to finally put on work clothes, the life path ahead of them has become very clear and narrow—deputy section chief, section chief, deputy division chief, division chief, deputy bureau chief... Once people embark on this road, they seem to think that there is only such a road in the world. Except for peasants, although only one or two out of every few hundred Chinese people have successfully or think they have completed their life under the guidance of Chinese-style values, no one can refute that almost 90% of the Chinese People, when they look at the figure of a bureau chief or the car he is riding in, think that is the best life. The result is that there are currently 34 million administrative personnel in our Republic, and the annual administrative expenditure alone is as high as 140 billion yuan... If a toy is only one thing to a child, then the child's most constant and active impulse can only be the impulse to possess that one thing.If a big action similar to "revolution" is called among children, then of course the first object of "revolution" they identify can only be the companion who owns that thing. Building a bridge between people's beliefs and people's real interest possession is like spreading a red carpet between the church and the Congress.The singularity of human value orientation, whether spiritual or material, is a primitive existence for a country, a nation, or a generation. If there had been a dialogue between Wu Zhenhai and his contemporaries back then, there would have been only one result—both sides thought the other was a fool. In 1982, after Wu Zhenhai's unlucky "dumping coal" operation, he appeared in Beijing and appeared in front of me.And his wife, an alumnus who is one class lower than me.They want to go to Beijing to find the relevant ministries and commissions to allow them to set up some kind of company.That was the first time I saw him since I went to the countryside in 1968.He was dusty, tired, and had a high fever of 39°C.He couldn't find a place to stay, and maybe to save money, he lived in my bachelor dormitory that night, sharing my single bed with his wife.Even sleeping on it alone would make the bed seem too small.The next day I invited the couple to have a breakfast in Beiying cafeteria, nothing more than steamed buns, pickles, and rice porridge.I remember before he left, I persuaded him solemnly and earnestly. "Zhenhai, I beg for mercy, go through the back door and go back to a state-owned factory!" "So what?" "Start from scratch, in your 30s, it's not too late, work hard..." "So what?" "As long as you really work hard, if the leader is not blind, you will see it..." "I've been thinking—so what? I've been thinking about it for ten years." "you……" I looked at him like I was looking at an older "missed youth" who refused to turn around, a son who was sorry for his mother at all, a guy who didn't take the responsibilities of "husband" and "father" as the same thing at all. I thought to myself—this Wu Zhenhai is hopeless, it's over. If the atmospheric environment is constant, what is the difference between the sky and the tiled floor? If the times remain the same, how is Sima Qian's work different from that of the Weaving Girl? If society does not change, what is the difference between a day and a year? If fate is unchanging, what is the difference between human beings and ants? Regardless of anyone, when he is typical as a human being, in the final analysis, it means that he has "stolen" the typical characteristics of the times.Chichikov is a strange breed born of serfdom in the Tsarist Russian era, Edison is the childhood son of American capitalist technology, and Yacocca is the darling of the fierce competition in the contemporary Western market economy.That's why Iacocca said: "This country gave me such an opportunity!" But Aesop's misfortune is precisely that the times never gave him the freedom he longed for. Ten years later, when I met Wu Zhenhai for the second time, he was already the chairman of Harkson Company and the person who brought in the first foreign investment in Harbin.When I write this article, Hackson is already a comprehensive development joint venture company with 10 subsidiaries in many countries around the world. In the past 10 years, I have only been back to Harbin a few times, and every time I go and stop in a hurry, this is one of the reasons why I never see him every time.The second reason, or frankly the more important reason, is that at that time I always held a very contemptuous attitude towards the first generation of people who founded companies in China.Emerson once said: "Those who curse business will see and have to admit that it is the laws of business that have changed America, destroyed its feudal system, and established an America." Very ashamed, a few years Today, I'm still one of those "business-swearing people."In my self-confessional booklet "From Fudan to Beijing Film Academy", readers can easily find my plausible and extreme remarks.It also talked about a "report" I gave at the Central Party School.A female reader wrote me a letter after that, expressing roughly the same ideas as Emerson's words I quoted above, and kindly "refuting" my hostility to business.This made me very annoyed, the reply was lackluster, the words were aggressive, and I even used a few strings of "national curse".The year 1985 or 1986.It's not that I'm so arrogant that I can't stand "criticism" at all.What's more, as far as the other party is concerned, there is no "criticism" at all, but mutual discussion.My annoyance is - I didn't see fair business principles back then.The desire of ordinary people to make a living by themselves was still blocked from the commercial era by the glass of the system, just like a hungry man being turned away from a restaurant.If the principles of commerce are unequal, no attitude can be attained except abhorrent. Based on the above view of reality—whether this view is still extreme or not, it was indeed my view of reality at the time—I have a very disdainful attitude towards most companies; for most bosses, make up your mind” Old age and death do not communicate with each other", whether it is a middle school classmate, a comrade-in-arms in the Corps, or an old friend. It was a class reunion of middle school classmates, which led to my meeting with Wu Zhenhai.Meetings need places and money, so everyone thought of Wu Zhenhai, and I also thought of Wu Zhenhai.In times of need for material support and assistance, especially money, we are reminded of many people who seem to have long been forgotten.It's embarrassing for us to admit it, but it often is. That day, I and three other classmates who were very close to him in middle school went to visit him.He sincerely and generously treated us to an expensive dinner.Not only readily agreed to cover all the expenses of the class reunion, but also happily invited us to his home for a chat.We talked endlessly, talking about 3 o'clock in the morning!After all, they were also from a poor family back then, and they were hungry when they were young.He told us about 10 years of experience.The high-end leather shoes of the successful man pack a pair of scarred feet honed by the rough road.He is the first group of people of my generation who resolutely bid farewell to the state-run unit - the resoluteness that was tantamount to the mentally ill more than ten years ago; People who, more than ten years ago, needed to have a tough mental capacity to resist discrimination, contempt and all kinds of psychological oppression from all aspects of society; he was the first batch of people of my generation to run a company and started , collapse, do it again, collapse again, and still do it—it required the courage to break the boat and set the bow without looking back more than ten years ago; he was the first group of people of my generation to form a construction team. A few years ago, it was necessary to have the ability of the boss of the rivers and lakes; he was the first group of people of my generation to engage in real estate development. In Harbin City and even Heilongjiang Province, he should of course be listed as one of the earliest "pioneers" one. Among the "first batch" of the same generation, after 10 years of unconvinced, not admitting defeat, not turning back when hitting the south wall, and not turning back when hitting the south wall, it seems that he must After the stubborn but firm staggering effort of smashing into a big hole in the south wall, he succeeded.It was only successful in the 5th round.Loans, construction, pre-sale, supplement turnover with pre-sale funds, re-build and re-sale.This was Huo Yingdong's strategy for developing the real estate industry in Hong Kong back then, and it was also the experience of the first batch of real estate developers in Shenzhen and Hainan 10 years ago.Of course, Wu Zhenhai should be regarded as the first group of Harbin people who learned from Shenzhen and Hainan.This is nothing more than a gamble between people and the times.What he bet on is the rest of his life and the survival of his family.If he also loses this round, he will most likely be one of my contemporaries with the worst fate and fate.Perhaps it can be said that the times finally gave him a chance to be a winner.Otherwise, not only would it be impossible for him to host the gathering of all the students in Class 9, Grade 3, Harbin No. 29 Middle School, but we might not even know where to find him when we informed him to attend. Wu Zhenhai, who succeeded, said: "It is the times that gave me such an opportunity!" Sincerely!Although he is not yet a legend in the Iacocca style, I do feel that, like Iacoka, he has a sincere gratitude for the era. Su Shi said in "The Ci of Xiang Yu on behalf of the Duke": "It is time to come and not to lose, and it is an opportunity not to miss." In the past 10 years, Wu Zhenhai has been a person who is always waiting for the opportunity; in the past 10 years, he has lived like an arrow on the string; in the past 10 years, he has lived more tired than many of his contemporaries; Looking for leisure in nothingness, but this Wu Zhenhai is looking for adventure in nothingness. If we do a little research on the age, we will find that the age originally has such a nature: it has always admired only two types of people—those who are willing to live according to its requirements and those who defy its wishes and become victorious challengers in the end .It rewards them for appreciating the former, in order to make them more in line with its requirements, and dare not overstep its authority.It does not reward the latter as usual, instead of granting it, it hangs a punishment sword over its head every time.It appreciates them mostly only when it feels it needs them, which we call "turning points."At this time, their courage and spirit of rebellion and challenge are the catalyst for its evolution and the driving force for its turning point.Just as snakes sometimes need to sandwich their bodies between tree branches to complete their shedding.Without its rebels and challengers, an era cannot emerge from its old shell and be reborn, for which it rewards them generously.This kind of reward is often one-time, and it is extremely generous.It does not do them any favors after that, for it has rewarded them with the vital opportunity of a lifetime, and tomorrow has been added to it.The fact is also true, those who seized the opportunity at the turning point of the times, and thus achieved success, their success will have a confident continuity, because they were born at the same time as a new era, The lifespan of a new era is usually calculated in centuries.The new era needs its promoters to accompany it.As for those who have been appreciated, favored and even favored by it, they are either left on the old skin by it, or when it completes the painful turning point, they share its pain and evolve with it.Perhaps what it least appreciates are those who were not valued by it as a model yesterday, and who are today insensitive to its twists and turns.It does not imply any chance for them today, nor does it leave them any tomorrow.It is as useless and helpless to them as they are to it.The bandit today is like today, and the past is like this! I listened to Wu Zhenhai's narration, looked at his familiar face that hadn't changed much after more than 20 years, and chaotic flakes of thoughts were flying in my mind.I said to myself in my heart: Liang Xiaosheng, you must get to know your middle school classmate again.He has scales that are completely different from yours. If you don't understand why, how can you understand reality? I asked, "What did you think back then?" He asked back, "Which period was that year?" He smiled slightly, and said, "Before today, it was the same time for me." I said, "In 1982, when you came to Beijing, I advised you to 'reform evil and return to righteousness'." He said, "That's too cheap, isn't it?" I asked again: "What do you mean?" He said: "If I listened to your advice back then, what can I do now? If a Chinese person permanently and completely entrusts himself to a unit from the age of 20, and when he retires, he will only receive ten dollars from the unit. Tens of thousands of RMB, equivalent to more than 20,000 U.S. dollars. Didn’t our fathers and brothers survive like this? But is the best 40 years of a person’s life really worth more than 20,000 U.S. dollars? A different way of living Is there really no possibility? We Chinese say that life is very tiring, but in fact the most tiring thing is the country. The exhausted country finally has to change its way of existence. So no matter who it is, whether it is willing or not, There has to be a different way of life.” I asked, "Since when did you start thinking that way?" He said: "From the year when my father retired from illness. After working for a lifetime, he received a pension and retired due to illness. 70% of the pension was due to special care for him. It was more than 40 yuan a month, and our family of six How do I live? My father cried when he came home that day. I hid in a place where no one else could see, and cried too. I swear to myself——If I can’t take a different path from my father in the future, I will They don't live to retire at all." His Lincoln drove me home and I couldn't sleep at night. When I close my eyes, I can still recall the situation of his house back then: six people live in two huts, and the combined interior and exterior rooms are less than 20 square meters.The outer room is the kitchen, and a narrow bunk is set up to sleep, it seems that he is sleeping.He is the eldest son, with an older sister and a younger brother and younger sister.Fortunately, his mother was a woman who was very good at housekeeping, which eased the oppression of poverty on such a family.I clearly remember where the cupboard was placed in his kitchen and what kind of sugar bowl was placed on the cupboard.As I was studying at his house, I used an excuse to go out once in a while, in order to eat a spoonful of sugar from the sugar bowl.The school organized a spring outing, and I ate half of the cakes he brought... He is one of the earliest group members in the class, and he is also my group development person.From the first to the third year of junior high school, he has always been a class leader and one of the most cohesive and appealing students in the class.For weak boys and girls, they are used to calling themselves "protectors".We were very close back then. His biggest "problem" is his extremely strong sense of self-expression and self-proof, as well as his sense of participation that is so active in everything that he doesn't care what others think or think about him.He is the one with the most outstanding sense of self-expression and self-proof among all the people I have met and come into contact with from middle school to the Corps, to university, and to society.Especially among my contemporaries, so far I have not met a man with such aspirations in the above respects.Some eras, some activities, no matter the class or grade, or the whole school, may not have included him in the list of "central figures" at the beginning, but somehow he became one of the "central figures".He always seems to be telling others with his actions - how could this be without me?How can I not participate in that matter?It seems that he can do what others can do, and he can do what others can't.This will inevitably cause him to be criticized and criticized.But he never cared and went forward.As for what other people think, say, and look at, he seems to think that it is the freedom of others, and he can do whatever he wants.In winter, just after a few skating lessons, he began to imitate the posture of a master athlete galloping on the ice rink, wearing a skating cap, not caring about his ears and cheeks being red from the cold, with his hands behind his back, and he fell down repeatedly But neither embarrassment nor timidity.He loves to play basketball and didn't join the school team, but he is very eager to represent the school in regular competitions.Once the opportunity was obtained, he went on a rampage to "three-step layup".Fouls are fouls, and he is sent off when he is sent off. Anyway, he has experienced the excitement of participating in a regular game.Among my contemporaries, this Wu Zhenhai was an unqualified "specimen" back then.I guess the times stared at him like a hen stares at a chick turkey or ostrich? However, the comprehensive education in our traditional society can almost be said to limit people's self-expression and self-proof consciousness as their own responsibility.Looking back at the long chain of Chinese history, we can find that this is especially sanctimonious in classical culture. "Laozi" repeatedly said something like "one who sees himself does not know", which means that whoever expresses himself is not respectable or smart. "Book of Rites The Doctrine of the Mean" says: "There is nothing to see and nothing to hide, nothing to show and nothing to be subtle, so a gentleman should be careful about his independence." It means that in the smallest things, when you are alone, you must also behave within the norms. moment.How to be a model? "If you say that the sky is high, you dare not lose your balance; if you say that the earth is thick, you dare not lose your ridge." It means how high the sky is, but a model person dare not bend his back when standing; how thick the ground is, But a man who wishes to gain the respect of others dares not to take small steps.But Laozi simply said complacently, "I have three treasures": "I dare not be the first in the world for three days." Therefore, the "Cultural Revolution" became the only generally allowed opportunity for our generation to express ourselves and prove ourselves with confidence.Its expression is to practice "revolution", its proof content is "unlimited loyalty", and its theoretical basis is "rebellion is justified".这是整整一代人心理能量的一次性的大释放大宣泄，它耗掉了作为每一个单独的人来说至少需用三分之一生命进行储备的那一种自我表现的激情，同时严重挫伤了整整一代人将这一种激情化为自我实现的冲动，此后他们只能听凭时代的摆布。其中某些人自我表现的种种努力，实质上体现为一种低级的本能，一种自我异化，一种自我安抚的虚幻的追求。所以，被这一代人的群体客观上遗弃在城市里的吴振海，20多年中却不被城市的简单而粗暴的“价值秩序”所降服，甩头晃角地始终予以反抗，其自我表现、自我证明和实现自我的强烈欲望始终野心勃勃地保持着中学时代的原生态，使我不能不觉得简直是奇迹，使我无法不对此赞叹和赞赏。对于我的同代人，他具有极其特殊的鉴定价值和研究意义。起码证明了这样一点——在我的同代人中，原本是应该产生许许多多吴振海的。可是于今放眼看去，浮出于社会水面的，十之七八乃大小官员。而社会终于不得不承认，前一个时代在这方面的“生育”是不够节制的。它不但使自己尴尬，而且使一代人尴尬。Is not it?政府部门要转变职能，机关单位要缩编，于是同代人中多少人迷惘，茫然，惶惶不知所措。有些人忙不迭地扑通扑通“下海”，但是已比吴振海们晚了10年甚至更长的时间。于人生而言，有时晚了10年其实意味着晚了一辈子。 西方的有识之士总是警告时代：让我们想方设法再减少一位官员吧！让我们的社会再多几位成功的商人吧！让我们鼓励更多的人成为纳税者吧！ 难怪西方人总是骄傲地说——我是一个诚实的纳税者！ 这样的话听来很像是在强调——我是国家的主人之一！ 我的同代人中，本来应该有很多人到了40多岁的时候，成为一个纳税者的，可是实际上大概每出100名官员，或者1000名、几千名官员，才能出不到一个纳税者。 在某大学，一位西方很有权威的社会学家兼经济学家曾问我：“你对你们这一代人究竟持何评价？” 我毫不迟疑地回答：“他们是中国当代社会的中坚。” 对方又问：“何以见得？” “他们的存在，保持了时代的稳定。” “那么也就是中国目前的样子？” 我不禁一怔，继而告诉他，同代人中多少多少当上了处长、局长等级别的干部。 他反问：“中国真的需要那么多大小官员吗？” 我反驳道：“我们中的大多数在做国家的主人！是共和国新一代的工人阶级！” he laughed. 他归国后给我来了一封信，信中有这样一段：“一个国家，尤其一个人口众多的国家，若想在经济上迅速发展起来，社会成员的职业分工应是这样的——每1000人中，最多有10个官员就够了，其中包括既是某一方面专家又是官员的人；应有200名左右国家重点企业的工人；应有300名左右非国家性质的中小企业的工人；应有400名左右依靠个体职业能够丰衣足食的人；其他属于医生、律师、教育工作者，等等。” 他说，这是他这位对中国怀有友好感情的外国人给中国“献”的“策”云云。 我在地铁站见一个人随地吐痰被罚款，且被教育：“怎么一点儿主人公意识也没有？这地铁也是属于你的！” 那人佯装惊讶：“是吗？我从不知道我还有笔钱投在这儿。请问在什么地方可以把我那一股抽走？我们单位分房子还要预付6000元呢，我正好等钱用。” 我不禁回头看他，觉得好笑又笑不起来。原来事实上我们对这个国家从来不曾拥有过真正属于自己的股份。每一个人同它的关系，似乎更是一种抽象的诗意的精神关系，而非一种具体的物质的制约关系。显然，当农民感到，他流在某一片土地上的汗水于他是值得的时候；当工人感到，从车间运往市场的产品，每一批、每一类都隐印着自己的姓名的时候；当商店职员感到，所站守的那一柜台前生意兴隆或买卖冷清，不仅是尽职与否的问题而且是利益大小的问题的时候——只有在这样的时候，只有在这样的情况之下，农民才能从一片土地感受到自己是国家的主人，工人才能从一个工厂感受到自己是国家的主人，商店职员才能从一家商店感受到自己是国家的主人，人民才能从衣食相关的现实中感受到是国家的主人。 1992年我回过哈尔滨数次。 许多同代人总是问我：“中国今后还会怎样？……”这句话的注脚是——今后我们哪些福利仍有保障？今后我们还将失去什么福利？ 回望我们这一代走过的路，心中不免怆然。 吴振海及其公司的人们也总是问我：“中国今后还会怎样？……”这句话的注脚是——今后我们还将拥有什么样的时机？ 回想当年他在哈双公路上“倒煤”而且“倒霉”的情形，心中不禁肃然。 不少哈尔滨人的嫉妒属于一种恐惧，和那种想维护我们对某物的占有的欲望相一致。嫉妒使我们去考察疑惑中最微不足道的方面，并把它们作为焦虑的最不得了的根据。 不少同代人问：这公平吗？ 我曾替吴振海回答：这很公平。安于现状的人不必忧患冒险者将承担的风险降临在自己头上，但是也永远没有资格获得冒险者才能理直气壮地获得的一切。如果非说不公平，那和昨天时代太褒奖我们、太歧弃吴振海们是一样的。时代仅能在一点上体现它的公平，那就是给人以普遍的机会。 有了一个哈克森，便有200多个哈尔滨人解决了就业问题，包括大学生和研究生，他们的福利待遇比国家单位的还要高。有人说——进哈克森那要凭关系！言外之意，仿佛是它的一条罪状。但是如果哈尔滨有100家、1000家这样的公司，在福利、待遇方面与哈克森竞争并且胜利了，进哈克森还要凭关系吗？ 有了一个哈克森，只要它运作着，又将有何止千百人有了干活挣钱的机会？长久地没有这种机会社会将会怎样？ 有了一个哈克森，至今已有近千户哈尔滨居民住上了楼房，如果一概等待政府解决，又将等待多久呢？ 有了一个哈克森，去年春节前夕，十几名台商，包括一位台湾“立法委员”，才应邀来哈考察投资项目。 有了一个哈克森，一幢四星级饭店正在筹划兴建之中。北方的第二大城市连一幢四星级饭店都没有的话，是不能适应改革开放、大批吸引外商的新形势的。 今天的中国人恢复了寻找时机的本能，但时机注定不属于以下两种人： 一种人企望着某一天早晨醒来，时代像宠爱自己的阿姨一样，将自己轻轻抱起来，让自己骑在时代的颈上招摇过市； 一种人企望着某一天早晨醒来，以听来正当的什么名义，将原先和自己一样，而如今和自己不大一样的成功了的人打翻在地。 我的同代人呵，我的兄弟姐妹，愿你、我、他、她之中，第一种人少一些、再少一些，第二种人少一些、更少一些！ 南方和北方都有一种草叫“节股草”。生命力极强，一节一节地生，一节一节地死，哪怕还有一节不死，它便活着，并且会一节一节地再生。我的同代人呵，我的兄弟姐妹，我们就是那“节股草”似的一代啊！如果说我们已失去了很多，那么我们所获得的，则是一种顽强的复苏能力和再生能力。一切附着于我们的浪漫色彩、传奇色彩、自甘的苦难和无奈的磨难，早已是往事。在我们40岁的这一年龄，我们除了依赖于自己的复苏能力和再生能力，还能依赖什么呢？让我们彼此呼唤起、鼓励起、策动起我们的这一种能力吧！ 看哦，时代的巨鲸已将它沉思的头潜入世纪的“海”面，它那庞大身躯已然渐渐竖起，纪元的旭日正从明天的时空冉冉升起，照耀着那蓝灰色的庞大身躯，照耀着它竖起、竖起…… 阵痛只不过是倾斜，是失重，并非那猛烈的拍击造成的真正的阵痛迫临。我们怵然，我们肃然。我的同代人哦，我的兄弟姐妹，让我们吸入足够的一口空气和一口勇气，准备做第二次人生拼搏吧！ 对犯了经济罪的人与流氓、歹徒、杀人犯、强奸犯、以恐怖行径危害社会的罪犯，我一向是持区别对待的态度的。而对于犯了经济罪的人，贪污、受贿、勒索、坑骗百姓钱财者，我尤憎的是坑骗百姓钱财者。 如果我不作如下说明，则就对读者、对社会，尤其对我家乡哈尔滨市的公检法部门，当然也包括对我自己的文字太不负责任了。 事实是主人公吴振海后来受到通缉逃亡国外，不知所去。 对于我这一位中学同学目前的结局，我此刻写下“逃亡”二字的心情是很不好受的。然而“逃亡”二字又是最正确的，唯一正确的。 那一天上午，他打来电话要到我家见我。 我问他，在哪儿？ 他说，已在北京。 问，何时来？ 说，立刻来。 问，什么事？ 说，非常严重的事。 但他上午没来。 中午，他的司机从哈尔滨打来电话，问我见到他没有。 我说还没见，说他是要到我家来的，但不知为什么还没来。 司机说：“公司出事了，被查封了。” 我诧异地问，为什么？因为前两天，黑龙江电视台还播了他与众多外商签署开发项目协议书的新闻，并有一位领导人物到场祝贺。而电视里的吴振海神采奕奕，侃侃而谈，比以往任何时候都踌躇满志。 司机说：“老板见了你，会亲口告诉你的。” 说完就把电话挂了。 我想了想，并没太往心里去。估计是经济纠纷。近年，在形形色色的经济纠纷中，某公司被起诉、某公司被查封早已是司空见惯之事。而且，当时往往被传得惊天动地，不久又风平浪静了。 下午三点多，另一位中学同学给我打电话，进一步证实了司机的话，嘱我千万不要再见他了。对方是为我好，知道我的性格弱点——于“情义”二字上，往往掰扯不清。 我说：“不是我见不见他的问题，是他要到我家里来呀。他一没杀人，二没放火，三没投毒，四没强奸妇女，不是恐怖分子，我也没见到什么通缉令，他若站在家门外了，我能不给他开门吗？能不许他进吗？” 那同学语重心长地说：“晓声啊，反正你可要心里有数。” 我又认真想了想，仍觉事情的性质不会太严重。我首先排除了他贩毒、贩军火或出卖国家机密、被收买为特务的可能，在此前提之下，我决定他来了我还是要见他的。 大约一年前，我曾陈书哈尔滨市的领导，指列吴振海优点、缺点各数条。缺点中诸如：好大喜功，强烈的表现欲，习惯于夸大其词，为了获得成功可能不择手段等等。 这些缺点，在这个世界上，似乎只有我来批评、指出他才不生气。我陈书之目的，正在于使市领导对他有更透彻的了解，更好地驾驭他和他的公司，能使他少犯错误，不犯大错误，更不至于犯法。同时为我们共同的家乡哈尔滨市做更多贡献。 市领导在我的陈书上批语：难得一片诤言，读来令人感动。请吴振海同志阅后自己保留，依言谨慎自戒。 于是信转到了他手里。他果然并不生气，还请我和另两名中学时代非常要好的同学吃了一顿饭。 记得他当时说：“钱财身外事，人生尚有二三知己，值得欣慰了。” 我又联想到，大约半年前，我代中学班主任向他求助，希望他能暂借一套房子给老师住。老师年纪大了，居室无厕所，十分不便。 他显出为难的样子，说他虽然是开发住宅的，但在图纸阶段都已定价售出了。 我说：“那我不管。师恩不可忘。何况并非要，只不过是借。老师的家址，总归是要动迁的。我担保，以后还你就是。” 碍于我的情面，他答应了，但答应得很是勉强。此后一拖再拖，并不兑现承诺，也使我不再好意思督促他。 有一件事尤其使我生他的气。哈尔滨市作协主席林予，当年广受好评的《雁飞塞北》一书的作者，20世纪60年代北大荒文学的创始人之一，是我的文学师长，也是我忘年交。哈尔滨市作协定级低，林予主席是正处级干部。按市里规定，处级以上干部才可以公款安装电话。一位市作协主席，家里没有电话成何体统？但林予老师受迫害多年，牢狱生活早已损害了他的健康。“文革”后其实没再发表多少文章，无稿费收入，经济状况拮据。若自费5000多元安装电话，对他是一笔大支出，一时是凑不足的。我让他放心安装，之后去找吴振海请求资助。为此我当面向吴振海提过二三次，并写过一封长信给他，向他指出，这样的善事义举，一家经济实力不弱的大公司，是一定要做的。我甚至曾建议他，每年从利润中拿出五万，设一项慈善基金，命秘书平时看报，一旦发现需要救助之人之事，及时寄些钱去。少则几百，多则几千，济世扶贫，何乐而不为呢？ 他却只是笑笑。 后来我知道，连林予老师的电话安装费，他都没给报。答复人家说:财会有制度，没名目下账。 我拨长途电话将他骂了一通，因为他每每请人吃一顿饭就几千元的啊！而且常动员我这个最不愿做陪客的人为他做陪客！ 在那之后我有相当长的一段时期不理他，见了面也很冷淡。 后来林予老师病重，我分两次请人捎回哈尔滨5000元钱。第二次的3000元捎回哈市时，林予老师恰在前一天去世。 ... 获知他的公司被查封的消息时，我对他的气还没完全消呢。 半夜12点左右，电话骤响——是他打来的。见后知道是用手机打的。 问他在哪儿？ 说在我单位的门口。 让他到我家里来。 他说太晚了，到家里不方便。 我只好穿上衣服去见他。正是冬季，夜里很冷。他在一辆出租车里。我刚一坐入，他即命司机开车。我仿佛被劫持到了他住的宾馆。究竟哪一家宾馆，到现在我也想不起来。 我问他：“你究竟犯了什么罪？” 他大叫冤枉，说何罪之有！ 又问他：“把我带到这儿来干什么？” 他说，请我帮他写申诉材料。 我正希望细听端详，于是他说我记。他是信誓旦旦，我是半信半疑。 我说：“吴振海，我不信对你采取的行动完全是打击报复。” 他说：“等真相大白了你就信了。” 天亮后，他仓皇离开宾馆，说要避一避。 我说：“既然你自恃清白，又避什么呢？大摇大摆回哈尔滨去，法庭上见分晓嘛！” 他说：“好汉不吃眼前亏。” 我也得打的才能回家啊，可身上连一分钱都没有。 他掏出了一沓钱塞给我。 我板起脸说：“振海你这是干什么？” 他大窘，连道：“没别的意思，没别的意思……” 我从没见他那么失魂落魄过。 我从那沓钱中抽出一张，眼望着他坐的出租车从视野里消失。 那是我最后一次见到他。 我大约也是他在北京见到的最后一人。 当时我怎么也不会想到他从此逃亡国外。我以为，起码他对家人和亲人会承担起主要责任的。 后来他家被抄，弟弟、弟媳、妹妹、妹夫、姐姐、姐夫、女儿、女婿纷纷被传讯、拘审。 此后两年内，流言种种，他的案子也在流言中忽轻忽重。一个时期有人说，他的家人、亲人就要全释放了，吴振海也可以从国外回来了；一个时期又有人说，案子更大了，已通过国际刑警在缉拿他。 总之，两年内，他的家人和亲人中，几乎只有他老母亲是自由之身。 两年内我没回过哈尔滨市，但逢年过节，一定嘱别的同学们，千万代我去看看那老人家。对犯了经济罪的人与那些流氓、歹徒、杀人犯、强奸犯、以恐怖行径危害社会的罪犯，我一向是持区别对待的态度的。而对犯了经济罪的人，贪污、受贿、勒索、坑骗百姓钱财者，其中我尤憎的是坑骗百姓钱财者。我一直推想吴振海犯的肯定不是这方面的罪，推想他大概也不至于贪污、受贿和勒索。因为此前我一直以为，哈克森公司是属于他和他弟弟的“家族公司”，进而认为，他可能只犯两种罪——走私和行贿。 后来走私似乎也被排除了。 那么只剩下了行贿。 我又深知他的小气和抠门儿，心想他为了达到什么目的而行贿，数目也一定是很小的。 然而最近的事实是——他的弟弟已被判死缓，他的姐姐、姐夫、妹妹、妹夫被通缉，亲人作鸟兽散。 他整日形影相吊、孑然一身的老母亲，已经70多岁了。 我常常忆起，在他的公司迁往新落成的雄伟的哈克森大厦那一天，场面何其宏大，泱泱千人之众。后来甚至连马路上的许多过客，都混进去大快朵颐，白吃白喝。 那一天，他的老母亲，在他妹妹的搀扶之下，到处找我。找到了我，就和我避开热闹，蹲在走廊的一角儿，一人手里端一只小盘儿，只不过一边吃着几片瓜果，一边儿聊从前往事。 如今我才明白，哈克森集团公司并非像人们以前所说是“吴氏兄弟的家族公司”，它在原始法权上仍姓“公”，因而也仍姓“共”。 如果这一点确凿，那么吴氏兄弟的罪名，当然也就不止“行贿”一条了。 对他弟弟的宣判，主要根据的是“贪污”和“受贿”的数目。 在吴振海和哈尔滨市的公检法之间，我似乎很难相信他本人的完全无辜和冤枉了。 但是我又真的常常惦念他的老母亲。 毕竟，那一直是一位好老人家啊！ 大约在我写这篇文章的前一个月，吴振海的女儿突然出现在我家。她说来北京看病，向我借钱。 我问她需借多少？ 她说出的数目使我大愕。 我怔了良久，才低声说：“女儿啊，叔叔非是大款，非是什么老板，非是当年的你父亲。我上有老，下有小，每月的工资条上只700多，在哈尔滨的弟弟妹妹都下岗，生活都需周济。而我除了工资，额外的收入仅仅稿费罢了。我虽勤奋，但不善经营自己，属于多年低价的作家。你要借的数目把我吓着了！” 我给了她所要“借”的数目的五分之一。 面对以前有自己的跑车，有自己的住房，不需要工作而又奢侈惯了的这一个年纪轻轻的晚辈，我不禁又说：“女儿啊，从现在起，你必须学会节俭度日。叔叔给你的钱，是叔叔爬格子所得的心血钱。这钱来得可不像你父亲过去的钱来得那般容易。你不要嫌少。今后到了急需钱的地步，还可以来找叔叔。叔叔不忌讳你是通缉犯的女儿。但是你得明白——你接到手里的这笔钱，能救助多少上不起学的穷孩子啊！叔叔此刻心里就是这样想的。如果叔叔知道你不节俭着花，叔叔今后不会再帮你渡难关了！” 我相信我和吴振海此生还会再见面的。但在什么情况之下见面，则很难想象的了。有一点几乎是肯定的，在他的老母亲活着的时候，他大约不可能再见到她了。我想，我今年夏季若回哈市，主要的事之一，当是代他这个儿子去看望看望那位很好的老人家。 吴振海是我所熟悉的同代人中，更进一步说，是当年全班54名中学同学中，获得过最巨大的成功的人，也是和我曾有过亲密关系的人中第一个被通缉的人。雄伟的哈克森大厦已经易主。逃亡之前，他有次从国外回来，送给我妻子一条金项链，送给我儿子一个计算器。那是他第一次到我家。计算器还在，项链却已被我妻子丢了。我曾给他买过一套木刻八仙，价值比一条金项链还略贵些，它们还在他豪华气派的办公室的柜上摆着。八仙们并没能保佑他一帆风顺。我常想回哈市时将八仙们带回北京。我的作品中的男主人公叫刘振兴，就是由吴振海的名字演化来的。吴振海当然没有刘振兴那么好，刘振兴身上寄托着我对某些平民儿子们的理想和希望，那理想和希望也是最初我从吴振海身上似乎看到过的。吴振海一度实现了它，也最终破灭了它。他令我感到的遗憾也是相当巨大的。 我和吴振海的关系大至可分为三个阶段。第一阶段是中学时期。呈现在我记忆底片上的色调永远是友好温馨的，尽管中学时代的他，绝非是每个同学都喜欢的。事实上有些同学极不喜欢他，有的同学甚至很反感他，而我在班里是一个无人反感的同学。我和普通的男同学友好，和他之间的友情也就不奇怪。 第二阶段是20世纪80年代后期，他已是大老板，我已是小说家。他似乎格外尊敬我，但我知道他内心里其实是不大瞧得起小说家的。我想，可能任何一个人，无论扬扬得意到什么程度，总归还是希望这世界上有某一个人能多多少少地对自己拥有些批评资格的。这也许属于一种心理需要，会从另一侧面备感自己的社会存在的的确确是重要的。他的弟弟、姐姐、姐夫以及老母亲，对他来说，似乎都不能承担起如此特殊的角色。于是他选择了我这个他可以接受并且不至于使他感到羞辱的人扮演这种需要的角色。而我曾一度很愿意扮演这一角色，不觉得有什么不好，同时自己也获得一种满足。不是每个大公司的老板都随随便便地给予别人可以诤言批评和告诫自己的权力。也许我常替他扼腕叹息，恰因他曾给过我这种权力？ 有几次他当着客人们介绍我时，竟搂着我的肩说：“大作家！我中学最好的同学！全国著名！全世界也有名气！” 往往搞得我瞠目结舌，恨不得当众推开他，狠狠扇他一大嘴巴子，使他从此变成结巴，不再能那么顺口就胡说八道。 然而那时又是他较可爱