Chapter 2 Chapter 2 Etiquette Knowledge Needed to Improve Your Speaking Level

Salutation refers to the terms of address that people use to each other in normal communication and entertainment.It is the "vanguard officer" of verbal communication.In daily life, the address should be kind, accurate and conventional.The correct and appropriate address can not only reflect respect for the other party and one's own cultural quality, but also promote the success of communication. As the saying goes, "One good word keeps the winter warm".Appropriate addressing is like a greeting, so that the other party can get psychological satisfaction, smooth communication and successful communication.On the contrary, inappropriate address will often cause the other party's unhappiness or even sullenness, put both parties in an awkward situation, and cause communication obstruction or even interruption.It can be seen that whether the address is appropriate or not determines the success or failure of people's communication activities and the quality of management effects to a large extent.Therefore, whether you are an ordinary person or a leader or manager with a certain position, if you want to live a happy life and develop your career, you need to pay attention to the study of interpersonal address skills and strive to improve your address art.

The important role of appellation in interpersonal communication and management activities has long been noticed by people.Social psychologists believe that a proper address can make people feel happy, enhance self-confidence, and help form intimate and harmonious interpersonal relationships.And good interpersonal relationship is an important condition for people to be invigorated, mentally healthy and improve work efficiency.Appropriate titles can shorten the psychological distance between people and make people feel comfortable. So, what is the appropriate name?In fact, there is no uniform mode of calling.Different regions, different nationalities and different language traditions may have very different addressing habits; people with different occupations, positions, genders, and ages have different needs and expectations for addressing.This has resulted in the complexity and diversification of interpersonal address, increasing the difficulty of appropriate address.But one thing is common, that is to treat others with respect and courtesy.In this way, the other party will have a sense of pride and satisfaction in their hearts, and in turn, the other party will be happy to contact you and actively communicate with you.

This gets the relationship off to a good start.But only this is not enough, but also pay attention to the following points in the specific address. Names are not only a sign to distinguish oneself from others, but many people's names also embody the expectations of parents for their children.Everyone will value and cherish their own name because of the need for self-esteem, and at the same time, hope that others will remember and respect it.Therefore, when one's name is called by others, one thinks that one is respected, feels happy psychologically, and has a sense of intimacy with the person who calls one's name.At all times and in all over the world, some leaders, politicians and entrepreneurs are well aware of this kind of mood. When greeting people, they don't just say "Hello", but put the other person's name before or after "Hello".This has a very good psychological effect.It is for this reason that we are always moved and admired by people who can still call us by their own names after a long absence.

The title must conform to the specific circumstances of the other party, such as age, gender, identity and occupation.You should be warm, courteous, and respectful to the elders; you should be sincere, natural, and friendly to your peers, showing your frankness; you should be kind and humble to young people, and express your love and concern; Those with high positions or titles should be called by their titles or titles.In short, be polite, express your sincerity and respect for the other party, and be neither humble nor overbearing.Do not use "Hello" or "Hey" to address people. At the same time, you should also refrain from bowing your head and saying compliments.

When greeting multiple people, if there are older people, young people or the opposite sex present in the group, you should pay attention to the order of addressing.Generally speaking, it should be grown up first and then young, up and down first, women before men, and it is advisable to get acquainted with each other after being sparse with husbands.The title can best express the speaker's moral cultivation, knowledge level and civilization, and also reflects his communication skills.Taking into account the difference between the senior and the young will make the elders feel respected and the young feel at ease; if the order is reversed, not only will the elders be dissatisfied, but the young people who are addressed will also feel embarrassed.Furthermore, women should be respected.When greeting a group of the same age and identity, addressing women first will make the other party feel that you have a higher quality and be happy to associate with you.

What needs to be emphasized is that the above points are not isolated, but mutually restrictive and closely related.They jointly determine whether the appellation is appropriate or not and the degree of appropriate appellation from different aspects.In our daily life, we can only receive the most ideal address effect by analyzing the appellation needs of the addressee from various aspects and choosing appropriate address words according to the specific conditions of the addressee and the occasion of communication. Greetings, also called greetings, are one of the ways for people to establish language communication, and they are the lubricant for conversation.It can make friends understand each other on certain occasions, make strangers get to know each other, make unfamiliar people get acquainted with each other, enliven the monotonous atmosphere, and build a bridge of friendship for further talks between the two parties.

In our daily life, the main forms of greetings are as follows. Greetings on the way.It is to meet acquaintances on the road or in some public places, and say hello by the way.One is to shake hands with acquaintances who often meet, and say "Hello" and "Go to work".When we met on the road, we nodded, smiled, waved our hands, and passed by each other without getting out of the car.The other is when you meet an acquaintance on the road who you haven't seen for a long time, you should stop nodding and say a few more words.If there is something urgent to do, you have to make it clear with the other party before leaving.This is basic common sense in interpersonal communication.

Greetings before the meeting.Such as meeting an appointment, or after a guest comes, greetings before talking about the topic.One is the common and minimal way of greeting.Such as "Hello", "Please come in", "Please sit down" and so on.The other is the way of greeting in special circumstances, such as the sick, the elderly, teachers, friends, or when the other party is recovering from a serious illness, traveling long distances, or in misfortune, etc., the greetings should be extra considerate and heart-warming. The content of greetings mainly includes the following categories.

Caring greetings.This is a common way of greeting.Sincere and deep greetings play an important role in deepening interpersonal relationships. Motivational greetings.It is in the few words of pleasantries that give people encouragement and strength. Humorous greetings.Adding some humor and humor to the greetings is very effective in coordinating the communicative atmosphere.Good interpersonal communication and deep friendship are established among these humorous greetings. Complimentary greetings.No matter who wakes up early in the morning and hears a few compliments such as "You woke up so early" and "You are getting better and better", one after another, they will feel particularly comfortable and happy on this day.Complimentary greetings also need to talk about some skills, one of which is that the content of the compliment should be more specific, so as to have a greater effect.

In the greeting, the following points should be noted. Pay attention to the object.Greetings should vary from person to person, and don't be in the same tune for everyone. Be aware of the environment.In different environments, different outreaches are required. Pay attention to moderation.Greetings should be done in moderation, and too many compliments will give people a sense of hypocrisy and politeness. In short, proper greetings can comfort the unhappy, care for those who have been reunited after a long absence, and bring joy to neighbors and relatives, thereby communicating feelings, connecting friendships, and promoting interpersonal communication to a harmonious state.

Self-introduction, in general, is to introduce yourself to unfamiliar communication objects.Such as name, identity, occupation, specialty, etc., the purpose is to let the other party understand themselves, provide convenience for themselves as much as possible, and establish contact with the other party. When people meet for the first time, they will have a mentality of understanding each other and eager to be respected by the other party. Timely and concise self-introduction can satisfy the other party's desire, and the other party will treat each other with courtesy and introduce themselves. In daily life and work, people need to communicate with each other in order to seek understanding, help and support.Self-introduction is the most common way to communicate with others, enhance understanding, and establish connections. In social activities, if you want to meet someone but no one has introduced you, you can introduce yourself to the other party.The content of self-introduction can be determined according to actual needs and the occasion, and should be clearly targeted.In some public places and general social occasions, I have no desire to communicate with the other party in depth, and introducing myself is just to show my identity to the other party.In this case, you only need to introduce your name, such as: "Hi, my name is Wang Hai." or "I am Wang Hai".Sometimes, you can also explain how your name is written, such as: "My name is Chen Hua, Erdong Chen, and Hua of China." If you need to communicate with people due to official duties or work, self-introduction should include name, unit and position, There is no job title to introduce the specific work you are engaged in.For example: "My name is Wang Hai, and I am the sales manager of Rongfa Company." In social activities, if you want new acquaintances to remember you and make further communication and contacts, in addition to your name, unit, and position, you can also mention the relationship with some acquaintances or the same hobbies as the other party when introducing yourself . Self-introduction should be concise, clear, and full of confidence; your attitude should be natural, friendly, and easy-going; your speaking speed should be neither too fast nor too slow;In social situations or during work contacts, choose an appropriate time to introduce yourself.When the other party is not interested, has no request, is in a bad mood, or is resting, having a meal, or busy with affairs, do not disturb to avoid embarrassment. If you introduce yourself to the attendees on formal and grand occasions such as lectures, reports, celebrations, ceremonies, etc., you should introduce yourself briefly and in detail. Introduce others, that is, the way a third party introduces two parties who do not know each other.In interpersonal communication, we can always encounter opportunities to introduce others, so how can we satisfy both parties and achieve the desired effect?This is a seemingly simple question, but it is actually very difficult to do. Introducing others should pay attention to the following issues. Under normal circumstances, the young and low-status are introduced to the older and high-status to show respect for the latter. The general sequence for introducing multiple people is: For two people of different genders, under normal circumstances, the man should be introduced to the woman, such as: "Miss Li, this is Mr. Zhao, who just came from Hebei." If the man respects the woman, the woman should be introduced to the man: "Zhao Teacher, this is Miss Li from Harbin..." For two people with different seniority and positions, the young, low-ranking, and low-known person should be introduced to the older, high-ranking, and well-known person.For example: "Mr. Wang, this is Xiao Chen from XX Company, Mr. Chen XX." To introduce a couple to others, in general, the husband should be introduced first, and then the wife should be introduced. In peer gatherings, unmarried people should be introduced to married people, and those they are familiar with should be introduced to those they are not familiar with. When guests visit at home, they should first introduce the guests to the family members, and then introduce the family members to the guests one by one.When introducing, the relationship and name of the person to be introduced should be clearly stated, and at the same time, it is better to be able to briefly point out their hobbies and characteristics. This will give the guests a pleasant and friendly feeling, and also show the harmony and fun of the family. During the introduction, you should generally stand up, smile on your face, pay attention to etiquette, and signal with your palm facing upwards, and you must not use your index finger to point. Don't be too wordy, just be able to bring out topics for both parties to talk about. The purpose of introduction is to connect feelings, harmonize the atmosphere, and establish a communication relationship. Therefore, the words of the introduction should be enthusiastic, and should not be cold, let alone damage the dignity of the person being introduced. Inviting guests to dinner is a polite behavior in interpersonal communication, which is common in our lives, but how to achieve our desired effect is really a disturbing problem.To this end, we should draw attention to the following points. First of all, determining the invitee is the first problem that the invitation should solve.The choice of the invited object must be determined according to the purpose of communication.Generally speaking, chess friends should be invited to play chess; dancers should be invited to dance; Guests engaged in communication and other news media... In addition, due consideration should be given to the knowledge, age, status, and personality differences of the invited objects and their relationship with each other.In order to prevent inviting someone who is not the right person, destroying the harmonious relationship between the invited objects, and causing inconvenience and trouble. Second, take the appropriate approach.This depends on the nature and object of communication.Scholars, experts, leaders, etc. are mostly busy with work and time is tight. It is best to meet them in advance so that they can make adjustments to their work and schedule; , open and aboveboard, and conducive to attracting attention, promoting publicity, and expanding influence; while between friends, it is more conducive to avoiding the sight of others and ensuring the concealment and randomness of communication activities.Ordinary exchanges, ordinary relatives and friends, just say hello, make a phone call, and send a message, and there is no need to be polite; for more important work contacts, business relationships, and public relations affairs, the corresponding official document format must be used, such as sending letters, Send invitations, etc., or send a special person to convey according to certain specifications, and visit the door in person to show attention, solemnity and respect.In short, the way of invitation varies from case to case and from person to person. Again, pay attention to the method of treating guests.That is, whether the invitation is feasible, whether the invitation is clear, whether it will cause inconvenience to the invitees, whether the invitation is sincere, etc.For example, someone opened a restaurant and cut the ribbon for the opening, insisting on inviting a certain mayor to come in person to put on a facade and do publicity.Unexpectedly, the invitation was not available for a long time, and it was delayed again and again, but in the end it was not invited, wasting time in vain.Therefore, the invitation should be done according to one's ability, neither to force others to do what is difficult, nor to do what one cannot do. In addition, before the invitation, it is necessary to clarify the time, place, activity content, and invitees of the banquet, so that you can know well and make the invitation well.It is also necessary to communicate the above matters clearly to the invitee, so that they can accept the invitation, assume the corresponding role, and attend the appointment on time. If the person you invite is busy with work and your invitation really brings inconvenience to him, you should immediately come up with countermeasures or cancel the invitation as soon as possible to avoid embarrassing the other party.This is convenient for others, and I don't make mistakes because of it. The so-called excuse refers to the non-primary or false reasons that people put forward in order to achieve a certain purpose in communication.Making excuses is a common phenomenon of life.When necessary, if you can find a beautiful excuse to promote the communication to a good ending, it will be a very decent choice. An excuse to conceal the intention.In communication, sometimes you don't want to expose your true intentions to the other party, and often need to find a beautiful excuse for your behavior, that is, find a reasonable thing to cover yourself.This kind of excuse can not only promote the success of communication, but also does not give people a reason to talk, and has the function of protecting self-esteem.For example, there is a young girl who is in love with a young man, but it is not easy to speak to her face.She hadn't seen the young man for a few days, and she missed him very much. She wanted to go directly to his house, but she was afraid that others would make fun of him.So she took a book, came to his house, and said: "Auntie, I'm here to return the book to XX, is he there?" The aunt said: "He hasn't been feeling well for the past two days, and he is in the house. Come in quickly. "She achieved her goal.Here, she found an impeccable and cover-up excuse. Make excuses for others.In the process of communication, if you find that your continued presence is redundant and will hinder the normal communication of others, you should find an excuse to leave the scene in a timely manner to create an ideal communication environment for others.Such things often happen in daily life.For example, at home, the sister-in-law sees her sister-in-law’s boyfriend coming, and it’s inconvenient for the two of them to talk in such a room, so the sister-in-law smiles and says, “Sit down, I’m going to the street to do some shopping.” She finds a Excuses and slipped out.The two young men were naturally very grateful to their sister-in-law for this excuse.Generally speaking, such excuses are fabricated and lie, but they are well-intentioned and positive. Say no to other people's excuses.Sometimes, if you don't want to participate in something, but you can't say it clearly, you need to find an excuse and refuse it. This is not rude, but also achieves the goal.In school, a male classmate asked a female classmate to watch a movie at night. The girl didn't want to go, but she was kind. She didn't want to keep him from coming, so she made an excuse and said, "Unfortunately, I have a date tonight." Use this It is appropriate to decline the other party's invitation with an excuse.At this time, the excuse must have a legitimate reason that is not suspected by others to be successful.If the reason you find is not enough to convince others, this excuse will inevitably affect interpersonal relationships. Avoid embarrassing excuses.Sometimes in order to avoid embarrassment, or if you don't want to stay in a certain social occasion, you can also find a suitable excuse to leave.A certain manager went to work in a unit, and it was almost noon, and the leader insisted on keeping him for dinner, but he had some discord with another leader of the unit, and he didn’t want to have the same dinner with this person, so he made an excuse and said, “I’m really sorry, today’s noon I want to go back. I have a friend who is coming, and I can't miss the appointment." With that said, it is naturally inconvenient for people to insist. An excuse to buy time.In the process of communication, when you are in a disadvantageous situation, in order to find a turning point and strengthen your position, you also need to find an excuse to leave the scene temporarily to think about countermeasures.The manager of a certain company was negotiating with a foreign company, but the other party’s asking price was too high, and he couldn’t decide for himself, so he said, “I’m sorry, I’m going to the bathroom, it’s convenient.” He left the scene and immediately called the general manager of the company to ask for instructions what to do.After receiving the instructions, he had a bottom line in his mind and started to continue the negotiation, thus making the negotiation a success. Finally, we should understand that even if it is a beautiful excuse, it must be used with caution.We must start with good motives, and find appropriate excuses according to the nature of the matter and the relationship between them, in order to produce the desired effect. If not, the excuse becomes a deceitful pretext, which will inevitably uglify your communication image and affect your normal interpersonal relationship. In any Chinese dictionary, there are very few words that can immediately win a person's favor as soon as they are uttered, which can turn enemies into friends, soothe selfishness, and improve self-esteem.However, the word "thank you" has this magic power.But "thank you" is so often underestimated or overlooked that it is so simple that many of us miss out on good people.We often hear complaints like, "I don't mind doing all of this as long as he can say 'thank you' every time." "I've done so much for her and she can't even say 'thank you.'" Saying "thank you" is the easiest and surest way to succeed in your work and cooperation with others.So, in communication, how to say thank you?Here are some ways to spread this humble but absolutely important message. Say thank you.Tell him what he does for you means a lot to you.Example: "I really appreciate your help with my studies." Give praise.Let him know that you think what he did for you is special and worth cherishing.Example: "Thank you for the coffee! I think I will remember you forever." give back.Tell him that you appreciate what he has done for you and that you are ready to return the favor.For example: "I appreciate you returning my calls during your advisory meetings, and please feel free to reach me in the future whenever you need me!" Write a note to say thank you.Saying "thank you" is helpful, but writing it down is even better.Consider writing a note in your own hand to express your thanks. Thanks for calling. "I'm just calling to thank you..." Give a gift.Send a gift with a note.It doesn't matter what you give as long as it expresses your appreciation very appropriately.A boss treats his secretary to a top-notch golf game. To reciprocate, she bought a unique gift—a miniature model of a golf club—and sent it to him with a thank you note in a gift box, much to the delight of the boss. Convey thanks.Tell someone how much you appreciate what he has done for you, and the word will eventually reach the ears of the person who helped you.For example: "Wang Min is such a nice person! She helped me arrange that meeting. I don't know what I would have done without her help." It will definitely add a lot of color. provide help.Be with them and offer to help them with their work.For example, help proofread a long-form story: "I'm here to help you with this. You're welcome, you've helped me too many times." invite to eat.Invite the person you're thanking to lunch or dinner, and be sure to say you're thanking him for his help.If you are inviting a married person, you should also invite his spouse. Reciprocate donations.If an environmentalist has thoughtfully reported on one of your papers, donate to his beloved environmental cause.This is perhaps the best way to thank him.But don’t forget to say “thank you” too.You can call or write a note to thank him and tell him what you did.He must be happy for what you do and what you have done. When communicating with others, it is inevitable to say wrong words and do wrong things, and it is inevitable to offend others, and sometimes even bring great mental pain and huge economic losses to others.In this regard, if you can realize your mistakes in time, sincerely apologize to the other party, and take the initiative to take responsibility, under normal circumstances, you can always get the other party's forgiveness.If you find that you are wrong, and you cannot apologize to others in time, or even try to find excuses to justify yourself, the result will not only not be forgiven by others, but on the contrary, you will be condemned morally and damage your personality and image. You lose friends, you lose friendships.Therefore, no one should underestimate the role of an apology. Simply put, an apology must master two principles: one is to be sincere, and the other is to be timely.There are several ways to make a timely and sincere apology. During the Three Kingdoms period, Gongsun Yuan separatist in Liaodong, afraid of Cao Cao's conquest, wrote a letter to Sun Quan to submit to Soochow. Sun Quan decided to send troops to support him with money, and made Gongsun Yuan King of Yan.Minister Zhang Zhao believed that Gongsun Yuan was unreliable and strongly opposed Sun Quan's actions.As a result, the two had a fierce dispute.Sun Quan finally did not adopt his opinion.Zhang Zhao was so angry that he refused to go to court.Sun Quan was also angry, and sent someone to block the door of Zhang Zhao's house.Zhang Zhao didn't show any weakness, and let his family block another layer in the door.Later, Gongsun Yuan killed the people Sun Quan sent, and Sun Quan realized that Zhang Zhao's opinion was right, so he went to Zhang Zhao's house several times to admit his mistakes, but Zhang Zhao just didn't see him. Once, Sun Quan came to the door of Zhang Zhao's house again and called Zhang Zhao's name loudly.Zhang Zhao was still bedridden. Sun Quan sent people to burn his door, intending to force Zhang Zhao to come out, but Zhang Zhao ordered people to close the windows too. When Sun Quan saw it, he asked someone to put out the fire, and he himself stood in front of Zhang Zhao's door. Later, after his son's persuasion, Zhang Zhao finally showed up.Sun Quan was very happy when he saw it, and hurriedly let him into his car, blaming himself all the way, begging Zhang Zhao to forgive him.Since then, the monarch and his subjects have been reconciled as before. In 1754, Washington was still a colonel, leading his men stationed in Alexandria.In one election for the Virginia legislature, a man named William Pace opposed a candidate supported by Washington. Washington and Perth are said to have had a heated argument at one point over election issues.He said something offensive to Perth.Pace punched Washington to the ground.Washington's subordinates rushed over immediately, ready to avenge their chief.Washington stopped them on the spot and advised them to return to camp. Early the next morning, Washington sent Pace a note asking him to go to an inn as soon as possible.Perth arrived as promised, and he was ready for a duel.To his surprise, what he saw was not a pistol but a wine glass. "Mr. Pace," said Washington, "it is human nature to err, and it is an honor to right it. I believe I was wrong yesterday, and you have been satisfied to some extent. If you think you can If it's settled, then shake my hand—let's be friends." From then on, Perth became an ardent supporter of Washington. A true apology is not just about admitting your mistakes and acknowledging that your words and actions have damaged the relationship between each other, but about taking responsibility for your mistakes bravely.Showing that you take the mistake seriously and want to get back together by apologizing can not only make up for a broken relationship, but also strengthen the relationship. When we communicate with people, we often find faults or faults in others.Some people can correct it as soon as they are reminded, while others seem to be deeply ingrained.no one is perfect.Who can live without fault?If there is a fault, even if there is self-knowledge and does not cover up the fault, the analysis and reflection on the nature, harm, and root cause of the fault are not as clear as many bystanders.We need sincere praise in life, but also kind criticism.Praise is encouragement, criticism is urging; praise is like sunshine, criticism is like rain and dew.Neither of them is dispensable.In real life, when we discover the faults of others, we should correct and criticize them in time, which is very necessary. Parents never criticize their children, they are doting. It is irresponsible for teachers to never criticize students. There are only compliments between friends, never criticism, not good friends, but wine and meat partners. A leader who only abuses cheap praise and never dares to criticize is a mediocre and incompetent person who is smooth and afraid of offending others.In the departments and units that such people are in charge of, bad people are bound to run rampant, unhealthy winds are unhindered, discipline is loose, people are scattered, and work and production go downhill. As the saying goes: "Beating is pain, scolding is love, no matter what you don't ask, it will turn bad." Although its original meaning refers to how to educate children, but by extension, it also shows that criticism, supervision, and spurs are a kind of care and love.No matter how many shortcomings and mistakes you have, people who have no relationship with you and have no feelings for you, as long as they don't interfere with his affairs, they will just be indifferent and don't care.Only a good teacher and helpful friend will tell you bluntly with an attitude of being responsible to you. Criticism is an art, and its starting point is how to make the other party accept criticism humbly, make the other party act more correctly, and at the same time make your interpersonal relationship more harmonious.In this regard, we have summarized some experiences. Psychological research shows that a criticism loses its effect if repeated.When some people criticize others, they always think that they have a reason, and they criticize endlessly.In fact, this is a very poor method of criticism.When experienced people criticize others, enough is enough.When criticizing others, you can only mention one or two points at a time. Don't "fire all arrows at once" and make people overwhelmed, otherwise it will mostly embarrass the other party.Criticism should not be repeated over and over again. Once pointed out, the other party has understood and expressed consideration or sincere acceptance, so there is no need to continue.If you just try to "smooth your mouth" and talk endlessly, you may get the opposite effect. When criticizing others, avoid using sarcastic and sarcastic words, such as "You are the only one", "You are just...", etc., because this is an attitude of contempt for others, and it is also a manifestation of lack of self-cultivation and lack of communication demeanor.Experienced communicators, when criticizing others, will use various techniques to present facts, reason, and be persuasive, but will not use sarcastic words and vulgar language to insult the other party's personality. It seems to be a human nature to like to hear compliments.When the praise from society and others satisfies their self-esteem and sense of honor, people can't help but feel joyful and inspired, and have a sense of intimacy with the praiser.At this time, the psychological distance between each other will be shortened and approached by praise, which naturally creates the necessary psychological conditions for successful communication. Parents often praise their children, and the family atmosphere is harmonious and joyful; leaders often praise subordinates, and employees' enthusiasm and creativity are constantly stimulated and mobilized.Praise is to the heart, as sunshine is to all things.In our lives, everyone needs praise and everyone likes praise.This is by no means an expression of vanity, but a desire to improve, to seek understanding, support, and encouragement.It is a normal psychological need to love to listen to praise, out of people's self-esteem needs.He often hears sincere praises and understands that his own value has been affirmed by the society, which helps to enhance self-esteem and self-confidence. Especially when the two sides of the communication have differences in understanding and position, appropriate praise will produce magical power. It can blunt contradictions, overcome differences, promote understanding, and speed up communication.Therefore, sociable people often use praise weapons to open the way for themselves.Praise is the lubricant for successful communication. Some people are stingy with praise, and it is difficult to reward others with a word of praise.They don't understand that more positive guidance and more praise and encouragement is a law of ideological education.Giving sincere praise to people reflects respect, expectation and trust for people, and helps to enhance mutual understanding and friendship. It is a good way to coordinate interpersonal relationships.Everyone has something to praise, it's just that the strengths and advantages are big or small, more or less, and some are hidden and some are obvious.As long as you are careful, you can always find admirable "sparkling points" in others.Even if there are many shortcomings or people who have been in a negative state for a long time, as long as there is a slight gratifying sign of correcting their shortcomings and asking for progress, they should be affirmed and praised in time.But praise should also pay attention to the following two points. Compliments should be sincere and natural.Sincere praise has a pure motive, it is not to seek to get something from the other party.Carnegie said: "If we only try to get something from others, then we can't give people some sincere praise, and then we can't sincerely give others some happiness." Complimenting others is tactful.In life, we often need to compliment others.Sincere praise is of great significance to others and ourselves. For others, his strengths and strengths are more glorious because of your praise, and he himself is more confident and energetic because of your praise.For yourself, if you praise others appropriately, it shows that you have been attracted by the advantages and strengths of others, and you are full of yearning for the things you praise. A mother who often praises her children can create a happy family; a teacher who often praises her students will surely win the infinite dependence of all students; a leader who often praises her subordinates must be the most Prestigious.But this kind of praise must be guaranteed: first, it is not inaccurate, second, it is very specific, and third, it can be done in moderation. On this basis, the great charm of praise can be exerted.