Chapter 10 It is easier to gain trust by dressing well and smiling

When they appear successful in appearance, the ideas they express are also more likely to be successful, and it is easier to achieve success.It's hard to explain, but it's real, and it's the effect that clothing has on the wearer. A psychologist who is also the president of a university asked a large group of people: what effect does clothing have on them?Almost unanimously, those questioned said that when they were fully dressed and spotlessly clean, clothing had an effect on them when they clearly felt tidy: It gave them a boost in self-confidence and self-esteem.When they appear successful in appearance, the ideas they express are also more likely to be successful, and it is easier to achieve success.It's hard to explain, but it's real, and it's the effect that clothing has on the wearer.

So what effect does the speaker's attire have on the audience?I have noticed something interesting, if the speaker is a slovenly gentleman, wearing baggy trousers, shapeless coat and shoes, fountain pens and pencils protruding from the breast pocket, a newspaper, a pipe or a can Tobacco bulges the outside of a suit; or a lady wears an ugly tote bag with her petticoats peeking out—the audience distrusts such a speaker, thinking that his mind must be a mess too. , like his unkempt hair, unwashed shoes, or bulging handbag. When General Lee went to Appomattox to surrender on behalf of his army, he was neatly donned in a new uniform, with a precious longsword strapped to his waist.Grant wore neither coat nor sword, but a soldier's shirt and trousers.Grant later recalled: "In comparison, I must have been a very surprised comparison. The other party was a beautifully dressed man, 2 meters tall and neatly dressed." The biggest regret in my life.

Hundreds of hives of bees are kept at the Washington Department of Agriculture's Experimental Farm.Each hive is equipped with a large magnifying glass. As long as the button is pressed, the hive will be illuminated by electric lights, and every move of these bees can be carefully observed at any time.The situation with the speaker is similar: he is placed under a magnifying glass, illuminated by a spotlight, and all eyes are on him.In this case, the slightest unnaturalness in his appearance is at once as striking as Pikes Peak in the Colorado plateau. A few years ago, I wrote an inspirational story about a banker in New York for American Magazine.I asked a friend of mine who was a banker to explain the reasons for his success.Friends of the banker said that the biggest reason for the banker's success was his charming smile.It may sound a bit exaggerated at first, but I believe it is true.People with more experience and sharper financial judgment than he—there were dozens or hundreds, but this banker had an additional asset that none of them had—the most accommodating personality, his warm , The welcome smile is one of the biggest features.He can win the confidence and goodwill of others almost instantly.We all want to see him succeed and are more than willing to support him.

Isn't there a Chinese proverb called "peace makes money"?Isn't a smile in front of an audience just as welcome as a smile behind a counter?I am thinking now of a student who attended a public speaking class sponsored by the Brooklyn Chamber of Commerce.When he stood up, there was an air all over his body, as if to say that he was happy to be here and enjoyed the speech he was about to give.He always had a smile on his face and looked like he would love to see us.Soon his audience felt that he was very kind and welcomed his arrival. But what I often see is something else: the speaker comes out with a nonchalant, artificial air, as if they hated the speech and would thank God if it was over sooner.Of course, the audience will soon feel the same way, knowing that this attitude is quickly contagious.

Professor Overstreet said in the book "Influential Human Behavior": "Likes generate likes. If we are interested in our audience, the audience will also be interested in us. If we don't like the audience in the audience , they will dislike us both outwardly and internally. If we act timid and flustered, they will lack confidence in us. If we act scoundrel and brag, the audience will also be protective. Arrogance. We are often judged as good or bad by our audience before we even open our mouths. I have every reason to believe, therefore, that we must pre-adjust a good attitude that will elicit a warm response from our audience."