Chapter 5 Chapter 4 How to start an efficient negotiation that wins by surprise
Break through the bottleneck of the conversation and win everything you want in the conversation:
The basis of all negotiations is actually the use of language.An excellent negotiator must observe and understand human nature and elevate speech to "the art of language", so that he can use his negotiation skills superbly, break through the opponent's high defense line and barrier step by step, and help you be more successful. Efficiently and logically persuade the other party to achieve your negotiation goals.
In a negotiation, the seller and the buyer had the following conversation: Seller: It seems that you are not satisfied with our company's washing machine, may I know the reason? Buyer: I don't like the shape of your washing machine very much. It doesn't look very strong. Seller: Exactly.Would you be satisfied if we changed the shape of the next batch of products to make them antiseptic? Buyer: That's fine.However, in this way, the delivery time will definitely be delayed a lot. Seller: So, if we can shorten the delivery time as much as possible and deliver the goods according to your request, can you sign immediately? Buyer: Absolutely. We have seen that in this successful negotiation, because the seller asked the right questions, the negotiating parties finally reached an agreement.It can be said that questioning plays an important role from beginning to end in the serious and intense negotiation process.Like the seller in my example, the best negotiators are very skilled at using the questioning method.It is precisely this kind of question that enables them to control the direction of the negotiation and firmly grasp the dominance of the negotiation, so that the negotiation reaches an agreement that is beneficial to them. So, what is the role of asking questions in negotiation?Specifically, there are the following points. 1. Throwing stones to ask for directions at the beginning. Many master negotiators will use the method of asking questions at the beginning of the negotiation in order to obtain more specific and reliable information when they have made sufficient preparations and know each other very well.Negotiators can obtain certain information in the opening questions about what strategy to adopt in the negotiation and what the other party may think, and then use this information to formulate or change their own talking strategy. 2. Get information. Questioning is the most direct and effective way for negotiators to obtain information from the other side.What is the real situation of the other party, what is the need, what is the idea, can be obtained by asking questions.Although you can also learn about this information in other ways, none of them are as direct and effective as asking questions.However, we need to pay attention to whether the information provided by the other party is true. 3. Remind the other party to pay attention. In order to draw the other party's attention to the information we provide, you can also use questions.Asking questions can establish a connection between your point of view and that of the other party, so that the other party can think carefully about the point of view you express.For example, "I think...do you think so?" This method will naturally attract the other party's attention, forcing the other party to give you an answer.So even if your intention is not to ask for the other person's opinion, but to express your point of view, you can use questions. 4. Emotional expression. When the other party talks about a point of view, asking questions can convey the message that you are concerned about this point of view, and the other party will definitely answer your question very enthusiastically, thus creating a harmonious negotiation atmosphere.For example, "I'm interested in what you have to say, but I have a question..." This shows that you care a lot about what the other person has to say, and the other person is sure to return the same concern to you. 5. Cause the other party to think. Asking questions can of course make the other person think.You can't directly say to the other party: "Think about what I just said!" because it seems to be an order; you can say: "What do you think about my opinion?" It is easier for the other party to accept. 6. Make a conclusion at the end of the negotiation. Towards the end of the negotiation, conclusions can come in the form of questions.For example, "Is it time to draw conclusions?" This question is obviously easier to get the other party to agree with than saying "Let's draw conclusions quickly."For the latter, the other party's answer is likely to be "no hurry, there are still some problems that have not been resolved". The above mentioned is the important role of asking questions in negotiations.Because it plays such an important role, it is necessary for negotiators to learn the skills of asking questions properly if they want to succeed in negotiations. Overall, asking questions should move the negotiation in your favor.Specifically, when using the method of asking questions, you should pay attention to the following questions. 1. Grasp the right time to ask questions. Asking questions is very important, which just shows that the method of asking questions cannot be abused.Don't think you can always ask questions.Before asking questions, it is best to carefully consider the possible impact of the question, such as whether it will interrupt the other party's thinking, affect the other party's emotions, and so on.Don't interrupt other people's conversation when they are talking about it, it will be very impolite, and it will also affect the negotiation. 2. Ask the right questions. The questions that negotiators ask must be targeted, that is, to ask the right questions.Questions should lead the negotiation to a certain direction, instead of asking random questions, and don't ask questions because of doubts that have nothing to do with the negotiation.During the negotiation, if you know that the other party may have doubts about a certain issue, you can use the method of asking questions to guide him to express his doubts, and then find suitable words for persuasive persuasion.Before asking a question, you'd better be able to think about your own problem.Avoid questions that may be ambiguous and leave the other party wondering how to answer. I have mentioned some invalid questions before, and they should be avoided as much as possible. 3. Ask questions in an appropriate manner. We know that the content of the question is the same, but the answer may be different.This is caused by the different ways of asking questions.The way of asking questions is very important. Therefore, when asking questions, you should pay attention to asking questions in an appropriate way and express your questions in a more skillful way.A believer asked the pastor: "Can I smoke while I pray?" The pastor replied: "Of course not!" Another believer asked the same pastor: "Can I pray while smoking?" The pastor replied: " Of course you can!" Two identical questions received completely different answers because of the change in the way the question was asked.
The motor products produced by Taiz, an electrical equipment supplier, are at the advanced level in the world, with complete models and perfect services.When the company planned to enter Boston, the market there was already occupied by another motor production company, KFC.Taitz has been fighting hard, but has not been able to occupy a place.Later, they learned that Wood Company was planning to introduce electrical equipment, so they sent salesmen to negotiate with the other party.In order to break the monopoly position of KFC, Tates made a big concession on the price, and finally reached an agreement with the other party.Although this kind of concession allowed them to enter the Boston market, the price of products in Boston was much lower than that in other places, and it became very difficult to raise prices. This case gave the negotiators an impression that they cannot make concessions in the negotiation, otherwise it will be very unfavorable to themselves. In fact, during the negotiation process, it is impossible for both parties in the negotiation to make no concessions, otherwise no agreement can be reached.Since it is a negotiation, there must be room for communication.As we said earlier, the negotiators are only trying to move the reached agreement towards the bottom line of the other party, rather than talking invariably. It can be said that it is the concession that makes the negotiation meaningful. It must be emphasized that the negotiators' concessions are not aimless, meaningless, and unprincipled compromises.Some negotiators do not intend to make concessions during the negotiation process; on the contrary, some negotiators make unprincipled compromises and concessions in order to achieve a certain goal.Both approaches lead to different outcomes, but neither is good for the negotiators.The former approach makes negotiators lose the opportunity to reach an agreement with the other party; the latter approach is more likely to reach an agreement with the other party, but this agreement is not good for one's own side. In the process of negotiation, it is very difficult to grasp this measure.Therefore, we must pay attention to certain strategies in negotiations, that is, to make concessions when necessary.When negotiators make concessions in negotiations, they generally hope that the other party can also make concessions. In the process of negotiation, concessions should be regarded as part of the overall negotiation strategy, as a necessary sacrifice to achieve your ultimate goal.Therefore, concessions should be made in a planned and step-by-step manner.As I said before, we must consider the other party's bottom line and your own bottom line, because these two bottom lines are the ultimate reference objects for concessions. Below I briefly introduce some principles that must be mastered when making concessions. In the initial stages of negotiations, don't rush to make concessions in a rush to reach an agreement.In most cases, the person who concedes first will be in a passive situation, because it seems that he wants to reach an agreement more, and this negotiation is more important to him.In this case, the other party will definitely put forward their own requirements further, and will also have an advantage in the negotiation psychology. Therefore, try not to give in to the other party in the first place.You must maintain confidence in your product or service and let the other party feel your strength.Of course, when appropriate, you should show your negotiating sincerity by making concessions.However, you must let the other party understand that you have to make concessions, and only such concessions are positive concessions. Because concessions have nothing to do with issues of principle, they are for achieving one's overall goals and are part of the overall negotiation strategy, so concessions can be made on some minor issues.Such a concession will not require you to make too much sacrifice, but will only win the final victory. Correspondingly, no concessions of principle can be made.This kind of compromise will make you lose your own goals, and in the end, you will not be able to reach an agreement in your favor.It's like talking to your opponent for an hour, only to reach an agreement that doesn't benefit you at all.Such unprincipled concessions are unacceptable. If those concessions on minor issues cost you a lot, then you must not give in either.Under certain circumstances, concessions on secondary issues may have more serious consequences than concessions on principled issues.You can't simply use the primary or secondary criteria to analyze. In many cases, secondary problems may also bring you unbearable losses. If you concede too much, the other party may miscalculate your limit, so it will be more difficult for you to achieve results.For example, as a seller, if you make a relatively large price cut, this will inevitably make the other party suspect that your product is not as good as imagined; if you only take a small concession every time, the other party will think that he has almost used it. You hit the bottom line, so you are more likely to reach an agreement sooner. Every time you make a certain concession, you must judge the value of your concession in the other party's mind.Before that, you have already mastered some information about the other party, and learned some important issues such as the other party's strategy and bottom line, so you can accurately predict the impact of your own concessions.Sometimes, it is a small concession for you, but the other party cares about it very much. This kind of concession should be chosen as a matter of course, and there is no need for you to make concessions that are not even important to the other party. When the other party asks for a concession, you should carefully consider the request and make a final decision carefully.Sometimes the other person's request is not a big problem for you, but sometimes it conflicts with your principles.In the latter case, you should deny the other party's request.
As we all know, negotiation may be a method that people adopt when the need to solve problems is more urgent, and because of this, negotiators need to have higher presentation skills.It requires negotiators not only to be able to express their ideas clearly and concisely, but also to attract the interest of the other party, meet the needs of the other party, and be quite persuasive.I am not going to say much about the importance of presentation skills, what I want to introduce to you is the key things to pay attention to in the presentation. (1) Honesty. Many negotiators are evasive during the negotiation process and seem to be concealing their thoughts and motives, which will inevitably leave an impression of insincerity on the other party, thus affecting the harmony of the conversation atmosphere.In negotiations, negotiators should clearly express their ideas and needs.Only in this way can the other party know what you think or meet your needs.In addition, tell them what the other party wants to know, so that you can gain the trust of the other party, understand the other party's thinking, and finally reach a consensus.Of course, confession is relative, not absolute. (2) Concise and clear. You should try to keep your words concise and clear.Negotiations do not allow you to make long speeches, what you need is to find a clear solution immediately.Don't use too many arguments to prove your point, which will make the other party miss the point and think you are talking too much nonsense.It turns out that most negotiators have an aversion to rhetoric with a lot of flamboyance and show impatience during the negotiation process.It is enough to directly state the point of view you want to express, and provide necessary explanations and clarifications. (3) Use appropriate intonation and speed. Many negotiators are eager to express their views, hoping to persuade the other party to agree with them as soon as possible so as to reach an agreement quickly, so they always speak very hastily. The consequence of this is that the other party does not understand what he said, and is quite impatient about it.In addition, some negotiators always intend to use momentum to overwhelm the other party. It seems that they hope that the other party will not even speak, and they want to use this method to win the negotiation.The consequence of this is that the other party simply keeps silent, but they will never agree with him.The result of either approach would be that the negotiations would collapse and lead to no conclusions.Therefore, don't try to overwhelm the other party with aggressive momentum, it's better to use a calm tone; and don't use too fast or too slow speaking speed, as long as the other party can hear clearly. (4) Correctly handle technical terms. In negotiations, you can use jargon to make yourself appear more powerful, but some negotiators have been disappointing in their handling of jargon.After they throw out a technical term, they often use it directly in the following conversation without any explanation.They take it for granted that the other person should understand the words they say.In fact, even in business negotiations, those negotiators may not necessarily be professionals, they are more likely to be business people, let alone other types of negotiations.Only by properly handling those technical terms, such as asking whether the other party understands what you mean, or simply giving some simple explanations, will the effect be better. (1) The use of buffer language. In the process of negotiation, it is inevitable that the views of the negotiating parties will conflict, and the needs of both parties will naturally conflict. In order to make your own ideas and opinions easier to be accepted by the other party, or to change some of the other party's views, you need to use some language skills to buffer this opposition.For example, "Your point of view is reasonable, but I have other ideas, I don't know if it is right..." This neither directly points out the mistakes of the other party's point of view, nor elevates one's own point of view. express one's opinion in a tone of voice.The other party's point of view has been affirmed to a certain extent, because they will not be disgusted with you or resist your point of view, so it is easier to accept your point of view, or at least be able to discuss it with you calmly. (2) Use of rescue language. If there are contradictions and conflicts that are difficult to reconcile between the negotiating parties, the atmosphere will become tense and the two parties will fall into an awkward situation.At this time, it is necessary to use rescue language to deal with it.For example, "I think that if we do this, it may not be beneficial to anyone." In fact, the other party must not want to see such a situation, and you have also expressed your sincerity that you are willing to negotiate successfully, so the atmosphere will generally become better , the parties are more likely to reach an agreement. (3) The use of flexible language. In negotiations, we need to say different things to different people.This does not mean changing the content of what you say, but changing the technique of speaking.The same should be true in negotiations.If the other party speaks elegantly and politely, the negotiator should try his best to make himself elegant and cultivated.If the other party is unpretentious and direct, then the negotiator should not use those elegant words.This approach can quickly and effectively shorten the distance between the negotiating parties, making it easier to communicate ideas and feelings. (4) Affirm the use of language. Even if the other person says something stupid, don't point it out.You should try to find out what is right about the other person and affirm it.Because you can't make the person accused agree with you unless you affirm him.More importantly, don't say some negative words at the end of the negotiation. This will make the negotiation end in an unpleasant way and have a great impact on future communication.You should tell the other party that this negotiation has benefited you a lot.
All questions must be answered.If questions have become an integral part of the negotiation process, so have the corresponding responses.Regarding the importance of the response, we have already said it before, but because the negotiation is strongly targeted to a certain extent, the response is also more important in the negotiation. There is such a story in the New Testament: Jews and Pharisees brought an adulterous woman, and they asked Jesus in public: "According to the law of Moses, this woman should be stoned to death. What do you think should be done?" "It's a trap.If he agrees, Jesus as a "savior" is responsible for the woman's death; but if he does not agree, then he violated the law of Moses.Then Jesus said, "If any one of you has done nothing wrong, let him stone her to death!" Everyone checked their hearts, and they all felt that they were not clean, so they went away, and the woman was saved. When negotiating, some questions are not necessarily more difficult to answer than the ones Jesus faced.With all his cunning and tact, Jesus ably answered questions before which some negotiators fell. So, how to answer the question in the negotiation?Here, I will tell you some answering skills I know, and hope that everyone can answer all questions calmly from now on. 1. Leave plenty of time for reflection. Before answering the question, you should give yourself enough time to think about the other person's question.However, generally speaking, during the negotiation process, the other party will not give you enough time for you to think calmly.Because he knows that the longer the time, the more you can give answers that are in your own favor.In this case, even if he urges you to answer right away, you can politely tell him that you have to think about the question and that it will take some time. 2. Categorize the problem. The first point of your thinking should be to categorize the questions the other person is asking.In other words, whether the question is friendly or difficult to answer, or even hostile.These three types of questions should have different answers. The first type of question, since the other party is not hostile, and speaking out will have no effect on you, if you are still evasive, it will appear that you are not sincere enough (it may even be that the other party uses the information they have already mastered to you. tentative). Although the second type of question is not hostile, it is a question that you do not want to answer and is inconvenient to answer. The other party may ask it unintentionally or on purpose.In short, answering such questions should be done with a sense of proportion, to see if it will affect the negotiation.The methods I'll talk about below basically fall into this category (unless otherwise specified). The third type of question occurs when your conflict is very serious. The other party may ask such questions because they are dissatisfied with your behavior and hostile to you.When answering this kind of question, you should be polite, and you should not take a tit-for-tat attitude, and then grasp the proportion of the answer. 3. Change the subject. In some negotiations, the other side may directly ask you bottom-line questions.If you answered such a question, you would obviously be passive.For issues like the bottom line, you naturally don't want to tell him so directly, because in general, no negotiator wants the negotiation result to be just the bottom line, and once you tell the other party your bottom line, you have already lost the opportunity to continue negotiating. meaning. For such problems you have to find a way to transfer.For example, the other party asks you, what is the lowest price of the product.You can tell him that the price you offer will never be too high, and before you tell him, you plan to introduce some superior performances of your products.In this way, you change the topic and win the initiative for yourself. 4. Answer vaguely. You can use vague language for questions that have to be answered but are difficult to answer right away.The so-called vague language is the language that gives the other party an uncertain answer.For example, when the other party asks you how much the lowest price is, you can say: "It will not be higher than the price you can afford." This kind of vague language is very clever, which not only answers the question, but also does not make you passive. Vague language allows plenty of leeway for itself.For example, when applying for a job, the interviewer asks you: "What is your expected salary?" You can't give the other party a definite answer, but you can say: "Between 2500 and 3500." Your salary fits. 5. Delayed answer time. When the other party asks you to answer a question immediately that you don't want to answer, you can delay the answer.For example, you can say to the other party: "I don't think this is the time to talk about this issue!" It might be better to have a detailed and precise answer." These reasons are irrefutable, so you will never encounter the same problem again. However, the delay can only be temporary.If you delay answering the other party's question this time, you won't be able to excuse the delay next time, so you'd better find a better way to solve this problem. 6. Handle the other party's mistakes appropriately. During the negotiation process, due to communication problems, the other party may not fully understand what you said, resulting in misunderstandings. This is a situation that often occurs in negotiations. Some negotiators adopt a wait-and-see attitude when the other party misunderstands them. If the misunderstanding is beneficial to them, they will turn a blind eye and make the mistake;This is an approach that only looks at the immediate and ignores the long-term. They are afraid that they will suffer losses, while ignoring that the negotiation is actually based on candor. In this case, the correct approach is, regardless of whether the other party's misunderstanding is beneficial or unfavorable to you, you should tactfully raise it to the other party. You don't have to worry that you will suffer losses because those things may not be what you deserve; If you conceal the real information, then when the other party finds out, you will lose more than you gain.
Negotiation is the process of engaging with each other in order to meet the requirements of both parties.Everyone has different needs and therefore exhibits different behaviors and performances.Although we hope that the negotiating parties can cooperate tacitly and complete the negotiations smoothly, in most cases, problems caused by conflicts of interest will continue to occur.In view of the need to create a peaceful and harmonious negotiating atmosphere so that the negotiation can be successful, we cannot directly reject or negate the other party, but must make a strategic refusal. In the following very classic case, one party to the negotiation used a very high rejection strategy, which turned a situation that was originally beneficial to the other party into one that was beneficial to itself. Hairui, a well-known electrical appliance manufacturer in the United States, is negotiating with another lesser-known company, hoping to sell electrical equipment to that company.That company's three purchasing representatives looked as inconspicuous as their company, while Hai Rui's negotiating representatives were well prepared and seemed to be very good at negotiating. The performance of Hairui's negotiator John and his companions was overwhelming.They started out with a pile of diagrams, images, and figures prepared to show irrefutably that their company's electrical products were the best fit.After they finished introducing their products, two hours had passed, and the other party sat quietly on the sofa during the whole process, without a word of rebuttal, just listening silently. After John finished speaking, he exhaled and said contemptuously to the unresponsive counterparty: "What do you think?" One of the purchasing representatives said politely, "Yes, you made a very good statement, but we don't quite understand it." John asked in amazement: "You don't understand? We've been talking for so long, but you can't understand? Well, what don't you understand?" "Everything," said the purchasing representative. The energetic John felt incredible, because their introductions were very detailed and convincing, but he could only ask, "Since when did you guys not understand?" "In the beginning," said the purchasing representative, "we didn't understand it from the beginning." What can John do?So he asked, "What do you want from us?" "You better repeat it!" John was like a deflated rubber ball, the confidence and aura he had just now disappeared all of a sudden.The other party did not object to a certain point, and their silence was a rejection of all opinions.But would John and his colleagues continue to spend two hours repeating their product?of course not.Purchasing representatives use this point to cleverly reject the other party, and at the same time win the initiative for themselves in the negotiation.Sure enough, Hairui's price began to fall, and the situation became more and more unfavorable to them. This is where the rejection strategy comes in handy.Know when to say no and how to say no in a negotiation, and you'll get great results.Some negotiators worry that their refusal will adversely affect them, so even if they disagree with the other party, they never show it.What they worry about is not the impact of the rejection itself, but the improper method of rejection. In addition, we encourage a negotiator to refuse, but it does not mean that he can refuse the other party at any time.If the negotiator is not expressing dissatisfaction with the other party, or wants to argue with the other party, he should not use rejection easily.You must refuse at the right time. For example, when the other party really wants to buy your product but cannot make a decision because of the price, you can say to him: "Sir, I have decided not to sell this product." product.” Normally, the other party will increase the price to buy your product. How to reject the other party in the negotiation?I think the following rejection methods are worth learning from. 1. Citing the limitations of objective conditions. In many cases, if the other party asks you an unanswerable question, and no matter how you explain it, the other party is struggling, you'd better express that you can't help, because due to the limitation of objective conditions, you can't answer the other party's question .This can make the other party no longer entangled and show understanding to you. The so-called objective conditions mainly include two aspects: one is limited to your own objective conditions, such as technical strength, authority, and financial conditions; the other is the limitations of social conditions, such as laws, systems, and situations.Of course, the two can be used alone or in combination. 2. Affirm first and then deny. When the other party puts forward a request or opinion and you disagree, you can first find out the reasonable part and affirm it, and then tactfully express that you are not sure about the other part. "Generally speaking, your opinion has some truth." Replying the other party with such words will make it easier for the other party to accept your opinion. When negotiating, try not to use negative words, and even if you need to express it, you should use a more tactful way.This should be true for everyone, especially the counterparty to the negotiation.They are people who provide you with certain benefits. Once they are denied, they will feel unhappy and develop a psychological resistance. 3. Use offense as defense. When the other party makes a request that you cannot accept, in order not to be restrained by the other party, you can turn defense into offense.You can mention a certain request of yours that the other party rejected earlier, tell the other party that you can agree to his request, but he must also meet your request, and say that the other party's request is consistent with your request.In this way, even if you agree to the other party's request, there will be no loss. 4. Guide the other party to deny themselves. Even if the other party makes some unreasonable demands, don't give tit for tat.Sometimes, you can insinuate the other party by insinuating, let him realize that his views have certain limitations, and then consciously withdraw his unreasonable demands.Only by letting the other party veto his idea, will he accept it sincerely without feeling unhappy. 5. Compensation comfort. If you don't want to cause the other party's unhappiness because of the rejection, but you have to refuse, you must find a way to compensate and comfort the other party.No matter how ingenious your rejection strategy is, it cannot cover up the basic fact that you have rejected the other party. The other party may have negative emotions because of being rejected.At this time, you must find a way to compensate and comfort. Propose that you can meet the other person's request that is insignificant to you, or express regret for your rejection, so that the other person's mood may be better.It is very important for you to fully express your negotiating sincerity.
Negotiation is in some ways a demanding persuasion process, that is, you can either persuade the other party, or you cannot persuade the other party, or you are persuaded by the other party.In negotiation, what you need to do is to convince the other party before the other party convinces you. Many people believe that it is too difficult to persuade opponents in negotiations because the conflicting interests of the two parties are so fierce.In order to solve this problem, I will give a small example first. A colleague and I were on a business trip to Manhattan.When we were eating breakfast, because there was still a lot of time left after ordering, my colleagues went out to buy newspapers.About 10 minutes later, he came back empty-handed and seemed to be cursing someone. "What's going on?" I asked him. "Damn!" he replied, "I went to that newsstand across the street to buy a paper, and when I got the paper, I handed the guy $10. He didn't take my money, but took my The papers were taken away. He then lectured me that his job was not to find change for people during rush hour.” "It's really unpleasant," I said. "This insolent guy!" continued the colleague. "I bet a tantrum like him would never exchange $10." "I don't like betting," I said, "but I'm up for the challenge. I'll try it out with the boss later." So, after I finished eating, I went to the newsstand that my colleague mentioned, while he was watching at the door of the hotel.When the newsstand owner noticed me, I said to him in a timid out-of-towner voice, "Excuse me, sir. I wonder if you could do me a favor?" The boss asked casually, "What's the matter?" "I'm an out-of-towner," I said, "and I need a copy of The New York Times, but all I have is a $10 bill. What do I do?" Before I could finish speaking, the other party handed me a newspaper and said, "Take it, it's not a big deal!" My colleague, who witnessed the event, later called it the "miracle on 54th Street." Many negotiators, like my colleagues, find it difficult to persuade others when negotiating.They all imagined their negotiating opponents to be too stubborn.I have said many times to the students in my Carnegie eloquence training class: "It is not difficult, it just requires skill." indeed so.Since both negotiating parties have sat at the negotiating table, they must have common interests.Both parties know that if they want the other party to meet their own requirements, then they must also meet the other party's requirements.In order to achieve the purpose of persuading others, you just need certain skills. 在此之前，你已经对你的谈判对手作了一定的了解；而在谈判的过程中，相信你也已经对对手有了更进一步的了解。在此基础上，你首先要确定他的需求，然后针对他的需求进行说服。 你只有告诉对方自己的意见能够满足对方的需求，才更加容易让对方接受。
谈判似乎总是要经历双方都不愿意见到的局面：谈判气氛似乎都凝固了，双方沉默不语，默默注视着对方，好像都心怀鬼胎一样；或者双方为某个问题发生了争执，面红耳赤地进行辩论。这种局面不知不觉地发生了，它使双方都陷入了尴尬的境地。最后的结局可能是，双方在沉默中不欢而散。 谈判在进入实际的磋商阶段之后，谈判各方往往会由于某种原因而相持不下，陷入进退两难的境地，我们把这种谈判搁浅的情况称之为谈判僵局。 为了谈判的成功，大多数谈判者还是希望能够尽快打破僵局。那么，如何打破僵局？ 1.调整情绪。 很多谈判者因为想要坚持自己的意见、改变别人的看法，会变得非常激动。我们知道，当人们在激动的时候，往往会失去理智。也许在演讲之前他就已经想好了该怎么处理僵局，但是当僵局真正出现的时候，他们却忘记了之前想好的做法。另外，有一些谈判者似乎已经做好了最坏的心理准备：既然对方能对他们的要求不依不饶，恐怕自己的目的已经达不到了，也没有希望获得谈判的成功了。这使得他们放弃了原来的礼貌和谦逊，口气开始变得咄咄逼人，甚至开始指责对方。总之，不论因为何种原因，他们都已经对谈判失去了信心。 由于我们之前已经预测到谈判僵局可能出现，那么等它真正出现的时候，就不应该使其成为谈判的终结。无论如何，你都应该尽自己最大的努力促成谈判的成功。你应该做的是，慢慢地平息自己激动的情绪，对谈判的成功恢复信心，然后采取积极的对策。消极回避对谁都没有好处，所以，你应该积极地寻找解决方案。 2.换个话题。 当对方不论你怎么解释都不同意你的要求的时候，你不妨转换一个话题。转换话题并不是再也不提你们发生争执的话题，而是将其暂时搁置，到适当的时候再进行讨论。转移话题的作用非常明显，它可以缓解紧张的气氛。只有这样，才能使双方平心静气地展开讨论，不再发生争执，才有利于谈判的成功。对你来说最重要的事情是缓解谈判的紧张气氛，因为这对谈判而言是致命的威胁。 然而，转换话题并不是一件容易的事情。它并不是消极地回避，而是积极地争取机会。在适当的时候，你的话题还是要回到你们产生争执的地方上来。因此，在你们谈论别的话题的时候，你要对你们的僵局进行反思，并寻找问题所在，然后采取有针对性的方法。 转移的话题必须跟你的主题有关，只有这样，才能保证你随时都能够把话题转换回来。不要谈那些不着边际的话题，这会让对方认为你在故意拖延时间，而且你也无法成功地转回到原话题。转移话题之后，要使话题自然而然地朝正题靠拢，从而让对方在不知不觉中接受你的意见。 3.更换主谈人。 谈判者可能会因为情绪问题而影响自己的判断，而且可能会在很多问题上形成成见，正是这些成见使谈判陷入了僵局。对对方而言，现在的谈判者及其各种做法和想法可能正是刺激他的主要原因。因此，如果可能的话，更换主谈人也是一个打破僵局的合适的方法。 选择那些对本次谈判比较熟悉的、具有较强能力的谈判者参与谈判。当然不能选择那些对本次谈判完全不了解、没有多少谈判技巧的人来继续谈判，因为如果你们更换了谈判者，说明你们已经作出了让步，而这样的谈判者无法掌握谈判的方向。 4.扩大双方的利益。 如果可能的话，可以适当地扩大双方的利益，即自己在某个问题，即使是原则问题上作出让步，而对方也能在某些重要问题上作出让步，这样双方都能够得到更多的益处，不过，这自然是建立在作出一定牺牲的基础上的。 必须要注意的是，务必使自己得到的益处比作出的让步多，这样才有让步的必要，否则你失去的将会更多。你的目的并不只是要达成协议，而应该是达成对你有利的协议。另外，不要要求对方作出太多让步，这样你也将达不到目的，而且可能会在另一个问题上造成僵局的出现。 5.调整自己的策略。 僵局出现的一部分原因是谈判策略不当。有经验的谈判高手甚至认为，没有不合适的目标，只有不合适的策略。他们的意思是，只要你的策略合适，那么无论你的目标有多高也都可以实现。这样说虽然有些夸张，但是的确表明了策略的重要性。 我在前面已经说过了谈判中的策略问题，它们并不都是并行不悖的。实际上，对一次谈判、一个谈判对手而言，可能只有一种合适的策略，因此，如果你发现这种策略不合适，可以换另一种更加合适的策略。 6.心理置换。 心理置换要求用一种换位思考的方法来处理谈判。很多时候，由于经验、学识、立场和价值观不同，不同的人对同一个问题的看法会存在很大差异，甚至会相互对立。如果你能够从对方的角度来看一些问题，对这些差异你可能变得更加容易接受，当然，你也可以要求对方从你的角度和立场来考虑问题，前提是你要告诉对方，你已经从对方的角度思考过这个问题了，然后采取一种合适的、折中的方案来解决使你们陷入僵局的问题。
In a negotiation, the seller and the buyer had the following conversation: Seller: It seems that you are not satisfied with our company's washing machine, may I know the reason? Buyer: I don't like the shape of your washing machine very much. It doesn't look very strong. Seller: Exactly.Would you be satisfied if we changed the shape of the next batch of products to make them antiseptic? Buyer: That's fine.However, in this way, the delivery time will definitely be delayed a lot. Seller: So, if we can shorten the delivery time as much as possible and deliver the goods according to your request, can you sign immediately? Buyer: Absolutely. We have seen that in this successful negotiation, because the seller asked the right questions, the negotiating parties finally reached an agreement.It can be said that questioning plays an important role from beginning to end in the serious and intense negotiation process.Like the seller in my example, the best negotiators are very skilled at using the questioning method.It is precisely this kind of question that enables them to control the direction of the negotiation and firmly grasp the dominance of the negotiation, so that the negotiation reaches an agreement that is beneficial to them. So, what is the role of asking questions in negotiation?Specifically, there are the following points. 1. Throwing stones to ask for directions at the beginning. Many master negotiators will use the method of asking questions at the beginning of the negotiation in order to obtain more specific and reliable information when they have made sufficient preparations and know each other very well.Negotiators can obtain certain information in the opening questions about what strategy to adopt in the negotiation and what the other party may think, and then use this information to formulate or change their own talking strategy. 2. Get information. Questioning is the most direct and effective way for negotiators to obtain information from the other side.What is the real situation of the other party, what is the need, what is the idea, can be obtained by asking questions.Although you can also learn about this information in other ways, none of them are as direct and effective as asking questions.However, we need to pay attention to whether the information provided by the other party is true. 3. Remind the other party to pay attention. In order to draw the other party's attention to the information we provide, you can also use questions.Asking questions can establish a connection between your point of view and that of the other party, so that the other party can think carefully about the point of view you express.For example, "I think...do you think so?" This method will naturally attract the other party's attention, forcing the other party to give you an answer.So even if your intention is not to ask for the other person's opinion, but to express your point of view, you can use questions. 4. Emotional expression. When the other party talks about a point of view, asking questions can convey the message that you are concerned about this point of view, and the other party will definitely answer your question very enthusiastically, thus creating a harmonious negotiation atmosphere.For example, "I'm interested in what you have to say, but I have a question..." This shows that you care a lot about what the other person has to say, and the other person is sure to return the same concern to you. 5. Cause the other party to think. Asking questions can of course make the other person think.You can't directly say to the other party: "Think about what I just said!" because it seems to be an order; you can say: "What do you think about my opinion?" It is easier for the other party to accept. 6. Make a conclusion at the end of the negotiation. Towards the end of the negotiation, conclusions can come in the form of questions.For example, "Is it time to draw conclusions?" This question is obviously easier to get the other party to agree with than saying "Let's draw conclusions quickly."For the latter, the other party's answer is likely to be "no hurry, there are still some problems that have not been resolved". The above mentioned is the important role of asking questions in negotiations.Because it plays such an important role, it is necessary for negotiators to learn the skills of asking questions properly if they want to succeed in negotiations. Overall, asking questions should move the negotiation in your favor.Specifically, when using the method of asking questions, you should pay attention to the following questions. 1. Grasp the right time to ask questions. Asking questions is very important, which just shows that the method of asking questions cannot be abused.Don't think you can always ask questions.Before asking questions, it is best to carefully consider the possible impact of the question, such as whether it will interrupt the other party's thinking, affect the other party's emotions, and so on.Don't interrupt other people's conversation when they are talking about it, it will be very impolite, and it will also affect the negotiation. 2. Ask the right questions. The questions that negotiators ask must be targeted, that is, to ask the right questions.Questions should lead the negotiation to a certain direction, instead of asking random questions, and don't ask questions because of doubts that have nothing to do with the negotiation.During the negotiation, if you know that the other party may have doubts about a certain issue, you can use the method of asking questions to guide him to express his doubts, and then find suitable words for persuasive persuasion.Before asking a question, you'd better be able to think about your own problem.Avoid questions that may be ambiguous and leave the other party wondering how to answer. I have mentioned some invalid questions before, and they should be avoided as much as possible. 3. Ask questions in an appropriate manner. We know that the content of the question is the same, but the answer may be different.This is caused by the different ways of asking questions.The way of asking questions is very important. Therefore, when asking questions, you should pay attention to asking questions in an appropriate way and express your questions in a more skillful way.A believer asked the pastor: "Can I smoke while I pray?" The pastor replied: "Of course not!" Another believer asked the same pastor: "Can I pray while smoking?" The pastor replied: " Of course you can!" Two identical questions received completely different answers because of the change in the way the question was asked.
The motor products produced by Taiz, an electrical equipment supplier, are at the advanced level in the world, with complete models and perfect services.When the company planned to enter Boston, the market there was already occupied by another motor production company, KFC.Taitz has been fighting hard, but has not been able to occupy a place.Later, they learned that Wood Company was planning to introduce electrical equipment, so they sent salesmen to negotiate with the other party.In order to break the monopoly position of KFC, Tates made a big concession on the price, and finally reached an agreement with the other party.Although this kind of concession allowed them to enter the Boston market, the price of products in Boston was much lower than that in other places, and it became very difficult to raise prices. This case gave the negotiators an impression that they cannot make concessions in the negotiation, otherwise it will be very unfavorable to themselves. In fact, during the negotiation process, it is impossible for both parties in the negotiation to make no concessions, otherwise no agreement can be reached.Since it is a negotiation, there must be room for communication.As we said earlier, the negotiators are only trying to move the reached agreement towards the bottom line of the other party, rather than talking invariably. It can be said that it is the concession that makes the negotiation meaningful. It must be emphasized that the negotiators' concessions are not aimless, meaningless, and unprincipled compromises.Some negotiators do not intend to make concessions during the negotiation process; on the contrary, some negotiators make unprincipled compromises and concessions in order to achieve a certain goal.Both approaches lead to different outcomes, but neither is good for the negotiators.The former approach makes negotiators lose the opportunity to reach an agreement with the other party; the latter approach is more likely to reach an agreement with the other party, but this agreement is not good for one's own side. In the process of negotiation, it is very difficult to grasp this measure.Therefore, we must pay attention to certain strategies in negotiations, that is, to make concessions when necessary.When negotiators make concessions in negotiations, they generally hope that the other party can also make concessions. In the process of negotiation, concessions should be regarded as part of the overall negotiation strategy, as a necessary sacrifice to achieve your ultimate goal.Therefore, concessions should be made in a planned and step-by-step manner.As I said before, we must consider the other party's bottom line and your own bottom line, because these two bottom lines are the ultimate reference objects for concessions. Below I briefly introduce some principles that must be mastered when making concessions. In the initial stages of negotiations, don't rush to make concessions in a rush to reach an agreement.In most cases, the person who concedes first will be in a passive situation, because it seems that he wants to reach an agreement more, and this negotiation is more important to him.In this case, the other party will definitely put forward their own requirements further, and will also have an advantage in the negotiation psychology. Therefore, try not to give in to the other party in the first place.You must maintain confidence in your product or service and let the other party feel your strength.Of course, when appropriate, you should show your negotiating sincerity by making concessions.However, you must let the other party understand that you have to make concessions, and only such concessions are positive concessions. Because concessions have nothing to do with issues of principle, they are for achieving one's overall goals and are part of the overall negotiation strategy, so concessions can be made on some minor issues.Such a concession will not require you to make too much sacrifice, but will only win the final victory. Correspondingly, no concessions of principle can be made.This kind of compromise will make you lose your own goals, and in the end, you will not be able to reach an agreement in your favor.It's like talking to your opponent for an hour, only to reach an agreement that doesn't benefit you at all.Such unprincipled concessions are unacceptable. If those concessions on minor issues cost you a lot, then you must not give in either.Under certain circumstances, concessions on secondary issues may have more serious consequences than concessions on principled issues.You can't simply use the primary or secondary criteria to analyze. In many cases, secondary problems may also bring you unbearable losses. If you concede too much, the other party may miscalculate your limit, so it will be more difficult for you to achieve results.For example, as a seller, if you make a relatively large price cut, this will inevitably make the other party suspect that your product is not as good as imagined; if you only take a small concession every time, the other party will think that he has almost used it. You hit the bottom line, so you are more likely to reach an agreement sooner. Every time you make a certain concession, you must judge the value of your concession in the other party's mind.Before that, you have already mastered some information about the other party, and learned some important issues such as the other party's strategy and bottom line, so you can accurately predict the impact of your own concessions.Sometimes, it is a small concession for you, but the other party cares about it very much. This kind of concession should be chosen as a matter of course, and there is no need for you to make concessions that are not even important to the other party. When the other party asks for a concession, you should carefully consider the request and make a final decision carefully.Sometimes the other person's request is not a big problem for you, but sometimes it conflicts with your principles.In the latter case, you should deny the other party's request.
As we all know, negotiation may be a method that people adopt when the need to solve problems is more urgent, and because of this, negotiators need to have higher presentation skills.It requires negotiators not only to be able to express their ideas clearly and concisely, but also to attract the interest of the other party, meet the needs of the other party, and be quite persuasive.I am not going to say much about the importance of presentation skills, what I want to introduce to you is the key things to pay attention to in the presentation. (1) Honesty. Many negotiators are evasive during the negotiation process and seem to be concealing their thoughts and motives, which will inevitably leave an impression of insincerity on the other party, thus affecting the harmony of the conversation atmosphere.In negotiations, negotiators should clearly express their ideas and needs.Only in this way can the other party know what you think or meet your needs.In addition, tell them what the other party wants to know, so that you can gain the trust of the other party, understand the other party's thinking, and finally reach a consensus.Of course, confession is relative, not absolute. (2) Concise and clear. You should try to keep your words concise and clear.Negotiations do not allow you to make long speeches, what you need is to find a clear solution immediately.Don't use too many arguments to prove your point, which will make the other party miss the point and think you are talking too much nonsense.It turns out that most negotiators have an aversion to rhetoric with a lot of flamboyance and show impatience during the negotiation process.It is enough to directly state the point of view you want to express, and provide necessary explanations and clarifications. (3) Use appropriate intonation and speed. Many negotiators are eager to express their views, hoping to persuade the other party to agree with them as soon as possible so as to reach an agreement quickly, so they always speak very hastily. The consequence of this is that the other party does not understand what he said, and is quite impatient about it.In addition, some negotiators always intend to use momentum to overwhelm the other party. It seems that they hope that the other party will not even speak, and they want to use this method to win the negotiation.The consequence of this is that the other party simply keeps silent, but they will never agree with him.The result of either approach would be that the negotiations would collapse and lead to no conclusions.Therefore, don't try to overwhelm the other party with aggressive momentum, it's better to use a calm tone; and don't use too fast or too slow speaking speed, as long as the other party can hear clearly. (4) Correctly handle technical terms. In negotiations, you can use jargon to make yourself appear more powerful, but some negotiators have been disappointing in their handling of jargon.After they throw out a technical term, they often use it directly in the following conversation without any explanation.They take it for granted that the other person should understand the words they say.In fact, even in business negotiations, those negotiators may not necessarily be professionals, they are more likely to be business people, let alone other types of negotiations.Only by properly handling those technical terms, such as asking whether the other party understands what you mean, or simply giving some simple explanations, will the effect be better. (1) The use of buffer language. In the process of negotiation, it is inevitable that the views of the negotiating parties will conflict, and the needs of both parties will naturally conflict. In order to make your own ideas and opinions easier to be accepted by the other party, or to change some of the other party's views, you need to use some language skills to buffer this opposition.For example, "Your point of view is reasonable, but I have other ideas, I don't know if it is right..." This neither directly points out the mistakes of the other party's point of view, nor elevates one's own point of view. express one's opinion in a tone of voice.The other party's point of view has been affirmed to a certain extent, because they will not be disgusted with you or resist your point of view, so it is easier to accept your point of view, or at least be able to discuss it with you calmly. (2) Use of rescue language. If there are contradictions and conflicts that are difficult to reconcile between the negotiating parties, the atmosphere will become tense and the two parties will fall into an awkward situation.At this time, it is necessary to use rescue language to deal with it.For example, "I think that if we do this, it may not be beneficial to anyone." In fact, the other party must not want to see such a situation, and you have also expressed your sincerity that you are willing to negotiate successfully, so the atmosphere will generally become better , the parties are more likely to reach an agreement. (3) The use of flexible language. In negotiations, we need to say different things to different people.This does not mean changing the content of what you say, but changing the technique of speaking.The same should be true in negotiations.If the other party speaks elegantly and politely, the negotiator should try his best to make himself elegant and cultivated.If the other party is unpretentious and direct, then the negotiator should not use those elegant words.This approach can quickly and effectively shorten the distance between the negotiating parties, making it easier to communicate ideas and feelings. (4) Affirm the use of language. Even if the other person says something stupid, don't point it out.You should try to find out what is right about the other person and affirm it.Because you can't make the person accused agree with you unless you affirm him.More importantly, don't say some negative words at the end of the negotiation. This will make the negotiation end in an unpleasant way and have a great impact on future communication.You should tell the other party that this negotiation has benefited you a lot.
All questions must be answered.If questions have become an integral part of the negotiation process, so have the corresponding responses.Regarding the importance of the response, we have already said it before, but because the negotiation is strongly targeted to a certain extent, the response is also more important in the negotiation. There is such a story in the New Testament: Jews and Pharisees brought an adulterous woman, and they asked Jesus in public: "According to the law of Moses, this woman should be stoned to death. What do you think should be done?" "It's a trap.If he agrees, Jesus as a "savior" is responsible for the woman's death; but if he does not agree, then he violated the law of Moses.Then Jesus said, "If any one of you has done nothing wrong, let him stone her to death!" Everyone checked their hearts, and they all felt that they were not clean, so they went away, and the woman was saved. When negotiating, some questions are not necessarily more difficult to answer than the ones Jesus faced.With all his cunning and tact, Jesus ably answered questions before which some negotiators fell. So, how to answer the question in the negotiation?Here, I will tell you some answering skills I know, and hope that everyone can answer all questions calmly from now on. 1. Leave plenty of time for reflection. Before answering the question, you should give yourself enough time to think about the other person's question.However, generally speaking, during the negotiation process, the other party will not give you enough time for you to think calmly.Because he knows that the longer the time, the more you can give answers that are in your own favor.In this case, even if he urges you to answer right away, you can politely tell him that you have to think about the question and that it will take some time. 2. Categorize the problem. The first point of your thinking should be to categorize the questions the other person is asking.In other words, whether the question is friendly or difficult to answer, or even hostile.These three types of questions should have different answers. The first type of question, since the other party is not hostile, and speaking out will have no effect on you, if you are still evasive, it will appear that you are not sincere enough (it may even be that the other party uses the information they have already mastered to you. tentative). Although the second type of question is not hostile, it is a question that you do not want to answer and is inconvenient to answer. The other party may ask it unintentionally or on purpose.In short, answering such questions should be done with a sense of proportion, to see if it will affect the negotiation.The methods I'll talk about below basically fall into this category (unless otherwise specified). The third type of question occurs when your conflict is very serious. The other party may ask such questions because they are dissatisfied with your behavior and hostile to you.When answering this kind of question, you should be polite, and you should not take a tit-for-tat attitude, and then grasp the proportion of the answer. 3. Change the subject. In some negotiations, the other side may directly ask you bottom-line questions.If you answered such a question, you would obviously be passive.For issues like the bottom line, you naturally don't want to tell him so directly, because in general, no negotiator wants the negotiation result to be just the bottom line, and once you tell the other party your bottom line, you have already lost the opportunity to continue negotiating. meaning. For such problems you have to find a way to transfer.For example, the other party asks you, what is the lowest price of the product.You can tell him that the price you offer will never be too high, and before you tell him, you plan to introduce some superior performances of your products.In this way, you change the topic and win the initiative for yourself. 4. Answer vaguely. You can use vague language for questions that have to be answered but are difficult to answer right away.The so-called vague language is the language that gives the other party an uncertain answer.For example, when the other party asks you how much the lowest price is, you can say: "It will not be higher than the price you can afford." This kind of vague language is very clever, which not only answers the question, but also does not make you passive. Vague language allows plenty of leeway for itself.For example, when applying for a job, the interviewer asks you: "What is your expected salary?" You can't give the other party a definite answer, but you can say: "Between 2500 and 3500." Your salary fits. 5. Delayed answer time. When the other party asks you to answer a question immediately that you don't want to answer, you can delay the answer.For example, you can say to the other party: "I don't think this is the time to talk about this issue!" It might be better to have a detailed and precise answer." These reasons are irrefutable, so you will never encounter the same problem again. However, the delay can only be temporary.If you delay answering the other party's question this time, you won't be able to excuse the delay next time, so you'd better find a better way to solve this problem. 6. Handle the other party's mistakes appropriately. During the negotiation process, due to communication problems, the other party may not fully understand what you said, resulting in misunderstandings. This is a situation that often occurs in negotiations. Some negotiators adopt a wait-and-see attitude when the other party misunderstands them. If the misunderstanding is beneficial to them, they will turn a blind eye and make the mistake;This is an approach that only looks at the immediate and ignores the long-term. They are afraid that they will suffer losses, while ignoring that the negotiation is actually based on candor. In this case, the correct approach is, regardless of whether the other party's misunderstanding is beneficial or unfavorable to you, you should tactfully raise it to the other party. You don't have to worry that you will suffer losses because those things may not be what you deserve; If you conceal the real information, then when the other party finds out, you will lose more than you gain.
Negotiation is the process of engaging with each other in order to meet the requirements of both parties.Everyone has different needs and therefore exhibits different behaviors and performances.Although we hope that the negotiating parties can cooperate tacitly and complete the negotiations smoothly, in most cases, problems caused by conflicts of interest will continue to occur.In view of the need to create a peaceful and harmonious negotiating atmosphere so that the negotiation can be successful, we cannot directly reject or negate the other party, but must make a strategic refusal. In the following very classic case, one party to the negotiation used a very high rejection strategy, which turned a situation that was originally beneficial to the other party into one that was beneficial to itself. Hairui, a well-known electrical appliance manufacturer in the United States, is negotiating with another lesser-known company, hoping to sell electrical equipment to that company.That company's three purchasing representatives looked as inconspicuous as their company, while Hai Rui's negotiating representatives were well prepared and seemed to be very good at negotiating. The performance of Hairui's negotiator John and his companions was overwhelming.They started out with a pile of diagrams, images, and figures prepared to show irrefutably that their company's electrical products were the best fit.After they finished introducing their products, two hours had passed, and the other party sat quietly on the sofa during the whole process, without a word of rebuttal, just listening silently. After John finished speaking, he exhaled and said contemptuously to the unresponsive counterparty: "What do you think?" One of the purchasing representatives said politely, "Yes, you made a very good statement, but we don't quite understand it." John asked in amazement: "You don't understand? We've been talking for so long, but you can't understand? Well, what don't you understand?" "Everything," said the purchasing representative. The energetic John felt incredible, because their introductions were very detailed and convincing, but he could only ask, "Since when did you guys not understand?" "In the beginning," said the purchasing representative, "we didn't understand it from the beginning." What can John do?So he asked, "What do you want from us?" "You better repeat it!" John was like a deflated rubber ball, the confidence and aura he had just now disappeared all of a sudden.The other party did not object to a certain point, and their silence was a rejection of all opinions.But would John and his colleagues continue to spend two hours repeating their product?of course not.Purchasing representatives use this point to cleverly reject the other party, and at the same time win the initiative for themselves in the negotiation.Sure enough, Hairui's price began to fall, and the situation became more and more unfavorable to them. This is where the rejection strategy comes in handy.Know when to say no and how to say no in a negotiation, and you'll get great results.Some negotiators worry that their refusal will adversely affect them, so even if they disagree with the other party, they never show it.What they worry about is not the impact of the rejection itself, but the improper method of rejection. In addition, we encourage a negotiator to refuse, but it does not mean that he can refuse the other party at any time.If the negotiator is not expressing dissatisfaction with the other party, or wants to argue with the other party, he should not use rejection easily.You must refuse at the right time. For example, when the other party really wants to buy your product but cannot make a decision because of the price, you can say to him: "Sir, I have decided not to sell this product." product.” Normally, the other party will increase the price to buy your product. How to reject the other party in the negotiation?I think the following rejection methods are worth learning from. 1. Citing the limitations of objective conditions. In many cases, if the other party asks you an unanswerable question, and no matter how you explain it, the other party is struggling, you'd better express that you can't help, because due to the limitation of objective conditions, you can't answer the other party's question .This can make the other party no longer entangled and show understanding to you. The so-called objective conditions mainly include two aspects: one is limited to your own objective conditions, such as technical strength, authority, and financial conditions; the other is the limitations of social conditions, such as laws, systems, and situations.Of course, the two can be used alone or in combination. 2. Affirm first and then deny. When the other party puts forward a request or opinion and you disagree, you can first find out the reasonable part and affirm it, and then tactfully express that you are not sure about the other part. "Generally speaking, your opinion has some truth." Replying the other party with such words will make it easier for the other party to accept your opinion. When negotiating, try not to use negative words, and even if you need to express it, you should use a more tactful way.This should be true for everyone, especially the counterparty to the negotiation.They are people who provide you with certain benefits. Once they are denied, they will feel unhappy and develop a psychological resistance. 3. Use offense as defense. When the other party makes a request that you cannot accept, in order not to be restrained by the other party, you can turn defense into offense.You can mention a certain request of yours that the other party rejected earlier, tell the other party that you can agree to his request, but he must also meet your request, and say that the other party's request is consistent with your request.In this way, even if you agree to the other party's request, there will be no loss. 4. Guide the other party to deny themselves. Even if the other party makes some unreasonable demands, don't give tit for tat.Sometimes, you can insinuate the other party by insinuating, let him realize that his views have certain limitations, and then consciously withdraw his unreasonable demands.Only by letting the other party veto his idea, will he accept it sincerely without feeling unhappy. 5. Compensation comfort. If you don't want to cause the other party's unhappiness because of the rejection, but you have to refuse, you must find a way to compensate and comfort the other party.No matter how ingenious your rejection strategy is, it cannot cover up the basic fact that you have rejected the other party. The other party may have negative emotions because of being rejected.At this time, you must find a way to compensate and comfort. Propose that you can meet the other person's request that is insignificant to you, or express regret for your rejection, so that the other person's mood may be better.It is very important for you to fully express your negotiating sincerity.
Negotiation is in some ways a demanding persuasion process, that is, you can either persuade the other party, or you cannot persuade the other party, or you are persuaded by the other party.In negotiation, what you need to do is to convince the other party before the other party convinces you. Many people believe that it is too difficult to persuade opponents in negotiations because the conflicting interests of the two parties are so fierce.In order to solve this problem, I will give a small example first. A colleague and I were on a business trip to Manhattan.When we were eating breakfast, because there was still a lot of time left after ordering, my colleagues went out to buy newspapers.About 10 minutes later, he came back empty-handed and seemed to be cursing someone. "What's going on?" I asked him. "Damn!" he replied, "I went to that newsstand across the street to buy a paper, and when I got the paper, I handed the guy $10. He didn't take my money, but took my The papers were taken away. He then lectured me that his job was not to find change for people during rush hour.” "It's really unpleasant," I said. "This insolent guy!" continued the colleague. "I bet a tantrum like him would never exchange $10." "I don't like betting," I said, "but I'm up for the challenge. I'll try it out with the boss later." So, after I finished eating, I went to the newsstand that my colleague mentioned, while he was watching at the door of the hotel.When the newsstand owner noticed me, I said to him in a timid out-of-towner voice, "Excuse me, sir. I wonder if you could do me a favor?" The boss asked casually, "What's the matter?" "I'm an out-of-towner," I said, "and I need a copy of The New York Times, but all I have is a $10 bill. What do I do?" Before I could finish speaking, the other party handed me a newspaper and said, "Take it, it's not a big deal!" My colleague, who witnessed the event, later called it the "miracle on 54th Street." Many negotiators, like my colleagues, find it difficult to persuade others when negotiating.They all imagined their negotiating opponents to be too stubborn.I have said many times to the students in my Carnegie eloquence training class: "It is not difficult, it just requires skill." indeed so.Since both negotiating parties have sat at the negotiating table, they must have common interests.Both parties know that if they want the other party to meet their own requirements, then they must also meet the other party's requirements.In order to achieve the purpose of persuading others, you just need certain skills. 在此之前，你已经对你的谈判对手作了一定的了解；而在谈判的过程中，相信你也已经对对手有了更进一步的了解。在此基础上，你首先要确定他的需求，然后针对他的需求进行说服。 你只有告诉对方自己的意见能够满足对方的需求，才更加容易让对方接受。
谈判似乎总是要经历双方都不愿意见到的局面：谈判气氛似乎都凝固了，双方沉默不语，默默注视着对方，好像都心怀鬼胎一样；或者双方为某个问题发生了争执，面红耳赤地进行辩论。这种局面不知不觉地发生了，它使双方都陷入了尴尬的境地。最后的结局可能是，双方在沉默中不欢而散。 谈判在进入实际的磋商阶段之后，谈判各方往往会由于某种原因而相持不下，陷入进退两难的境地，我们把这种谈判搁浅的情况称之为谈判僵局。 为了谈判的成功，大多数谈判者还是希望能够尽快打破僵局。那么，如何打破僵局？ 1.调整情绪。 很多谈判者因为想要坚持自己的意见、改变别人的看法，会变得非常激动。我们知道，当人们在激动的时候，往往会失去理智。也许在演讲之前他就已经想好了该怎么处理僵局，但是当僵局真正出现的时候，他们却忘记了之前想好的做法。另外，有一些谈判者似乎已经做好了最坏的心理准备：既然对方能对他们的要求不依不饶，恐怕自己的目的已经达不到了，也没有希望获得谈判的成功了。这使得他们放弃了原来的礼貌和谦逊，口气开始变得咄咄逼人，甚至开始指责对方。总之，不论因为何种原因，他们都已经对谈判失去了信心。 由于我们之前已经预测到谈判僵局可能出现，那么等它真正出现的时候，就不应该使其成为谈判的终结。无论如何，你都应该尽自己最大的努力促成谈判的成功。你应该做的是，慢慢地平息自己激动的情绪，对谈判的成功恢复信心，然后采取积极的对策。消极回避对谁都没有好处，所以，你应该积极地寻找解决方案。 2.换个话题。 当对方不论你怎么解释都不同意你的要求的时候，你不妨转换一个话题。转换话题并不是再也不提你们发生争执的话题，而是将其暂时搁置，到适当的时候再进行讨论。转移话题的作用非常明显，它可以缓解紧张的气氛。只有这样，才能使双方平心静气地展开讨论，不再发生争执，才有利于谈判的成功。对你来说最重要的事情是缓解谈判的紧张气氛，因为这对谈判而言是致命的威胁。 然而，转换话题并不是一件容易的事情。它并不是消极地回避，而是积极地争取机会。在适当的时候，你的话题还是要回到你们产生争执的地方上来。因此，在你们谈论别的话题的时候，你要对你们的僵局进行反思，并寻找问题所在，然后采取有针对性的方法。 转移的话题必须跟你的主题有关，只有这样，才能保证你随时都能够把话题转换回来。不要谈那些不着边际的话题，这会让对方认为你在故意拖延时间，而且你也无法成功地转回到原话题。转移话题之后，要使话题自然而然地朝正题靠拢，从而让对方在不知不觉中接受你的意见。 3.更换主谈人。 谈判者可能会因为情绪问题而影响自己的判断，而且可能会在很多问题上形成成见，正是这些成见使谈判陷入了僵局。对对方而言，现在的谈判者及其各种做法和想法可能正是刺激他的主要原因。因此，如果可能的话，更换主谈人也是一个打破僵局的合适的方法。 选择那些对本次谈判比较熟悉的、具有较强能力的谈判者参与谈判。当然不能选择那些对本次谈判完全不了解、没有多少谈判技巧的人来继续谈判，因为如果你们更换了谈判者，说明你们已经作出了让步，而这样的谈判者无法掌握谈判的方向。 4.扩大双方的利益。 如果可能的话，可以适当地扩大双方的利益，即自己在某个问题，即使是原则问题上作出让步，而对方也能在某些重要问题上作出让步，这样双方都能够得到更多的益处，不过，这自然是建立在作出一定牺牲的基础上的。 必须要注意的是，务必使自己得到的益处比作出的让步多，这样才有让步的必要，否则你失去的将会更多。你的目的并不只是要达成协议，而应该是达成对你有利的协议。另外，不要要求对方作出太多让步，这样你也将达不到目的，而且可能会在另一个问题上造成僵局的出现。 5.调整自己的策略。 僵局出现的一部分原因是谈判策略不当。有经验的谈判高手甚至认为，没有不合适的目标，只有不合适的策略。他们的意思是，只要你的策略合适，那么无论你的目标有多高也都可以实现。这样说虽然有些夸张，但是的确表明了策略的重要性。 我在前面已经说过了谈判中的策略问题，它们并不都是并行不悖的。实际上，对一次谈判、一个谈判对手而言，可能只有一种合适的策略，因此，如果你发现这种策略不合适，可以换另一种更加合适的策略。 6.心理置换。 心理置换要求用一种换位思考的方法来处理谈判。很多时候，由于经验、学识、立场和价值观不同，不同的人对同一个问题的看法会存在很大差异，甚至会相互对立。如果你能够从对方的角度来看一些问题，对这些差异你可能变得更加容易接受，当然，你也可以要求对方从你的角度和立场来考虑问题，前提是你要告诉对方，你已经从对方的角度思考过这个问题了，然后采取一种合适的、折中的方案来解决使你们陷入僵局的问题。