Chapter 112 9. Li Zicheng is a pure man

After brutally killing Yuan Chonghuan, Emperor Chongzhen looked refreshed, and once again considered other candidates for the management of Liaodong. However, Confucius once said: "I am afraid that Ji Sun's misfortune is not outside the Xiao Wall, but inside the Xiao Wall." What do you mean? Confucius meant, don’t worry about external enemies, all external enemies are paper tigers, but the fortress must be breached from the inside... It means, don’t bother with Man Qing, just treat them as if they don’t exist, at this time The biggest threat to you comes from your side... Where is it around you?

In the thirty-fourth year of Wanli, when the rooster crows in the third month of Bingwu, a knife hangs in the southwest sky, with the edge of the knife facing upwards, and everything will be destroyed in one month.After the mysterious Guandao appeared, a super weird child was born in a farmer's family in Shuangquanbao, Mizhi County, Yan'an Prefecture, Shaanxi. This child has super high cheekbones, deep-set eye sockets, owl eyes, orangutan nose, and a hollow in the cap of the sky, and the sound of crying, quack quack, chatter... like a jackal howling at night.Although this child looks wrong in every way and has severe atavism, he is his own after all, so the family named this child Li Hongji, hoping that this child will be able to make a fortune when he grows up.

Li Hongji grew up slowly, at first he was lively and active, but suddenly one day, he became taciturn for no reason, and his family teased him, but he ignored them.At this time, his nephew Li Guo and a man named Liu Guoneng came to him and asked him to go to Guandi Temple to play together.When we arrived at the Guandi Temple, Li Guo said, "Uncle Ji, why don't we follow Taoyuan's trio of sworn brothers and pray to our brothers here?" Li Hongji was very distressed: "Li Guo, you are my nephew, how can you worship me?" What about the brothers? Isn’t this messing up the seniority?” Liu Guoneng said with a smile: “Zi once said that all people in the world are brothers... According to Confucius, don’t talk about uncles and nephews, even fathers and sons, it’s the same. You can also ask for help."

Li Hongji was persuaded, so the three of them prepared to become sworn brothers.But before sworn oath, you have to figure out who is the boss first, because you don't want everyone to fight to be the boss, and no one wants to be the boss.After arguing, the three decided to try their best to lift the censer in the temple. The censer weighed more than a thousand catties, and whoever could lift it would be the boss. Li Guo raised it first, but saw that the incense burner did not move.When it was Liu Guoneng's turn, his face was red from exhaustion, but he couldn't shake the incense burner.

Finally it was Li Hongji's turn, and he walked up to the incense burner and let out a sudden violent roar, which made the concave hole in his forehead bulge suddenly.Amid Li Guo and Liu Guoneng's exclamations, Li Hongji exerted all his strength, and he lifted the heavy incense burner high. Li Guo and Liu Guoneng were stunned: "Uncle... Boss... Boss... Boss... Put it down quickly, but don't let the incense burner crush you..." Suddenly, Li Hongji stared strangely, and said loudly: "There is something, I can no longer hide it from you. Do you know why I suddenly changed my temperament three years ago, and I have been silent since then? Because, ah, one night in three years , I dreamed of a tall and stalwart general who strode up to me and said, "Li Hongji, what are you doing here? Hurry up and go to Beijing to ascend the throne..."' Speaking of which, Li Hongji burst into tears: " I was born to be the emperor, but you fucking let me hold the censer here, it’s useless to hold the censer, how much will you give me when I hold it for two hours?"

With a "boom", Li Hongji threw the huge incense burner in his hand, and roared: "I will call Li Zicheng from now on, and I will be the emperor. Don't stop me..." Li Zicheng was born like this, and the lifespan of the Ming Empire quickly entered the countdown. If there is a woman hidden in Emperor Chongzhen's body, then Li Zicheng is a pure man.The performance of a pure man is that he can't read a single big character, he doesn't like to button his chest when he wears clothes, he tilts his neck violently when drinking, let the wine drip down the corner of his mouth and onto his chest hair, and then he wipes it with his hand, waiting When the woman next to her was stunned, she suddenly slapped her ear: "What are you looking at? I'm tired of working, aren't you..."

People like pure men generally have relatively primitive minds and don't know what it means to respect women.In front of such a low-level man, no kind of charming woman can do anything.In the war between the sexes through the ages, women can only gain the upper hand with their savagery when facing a gentleman, but when they encounter a gangster like Li Zicheng who only enjoys ravaging women, then there is no curse. "Ming Tong Jian" records that under Li Zicheng's subordinates, there is a guy named Li Shuangxi, who is vicious and evil by nature.His favorite thing is to capture a woman, rape her and impregnate her. When the fetus is seven or eight months old, Li Shuangxi will drag the pregnant woman over and chop off her hands and feet to watch her in pain. Wriggling and crawling on the ground, Li Shuangxi's heart would be sublimated quickly, and he would feel the joy of happiness that made him weep.

Seeing that Li Shuangxi was so brave in thinking and innovation, Li Zicheng was overjoyed and immediately adopted Li Shuangxi as his adopted son.Later, when Li Zicheng invaded the city of Beijing and established the Dashun Dynasty, he specially appointed the murderous Li Shuangxi as the prince.From this matter, we can make a comprehensive evaluation of Li Zicheng's personal character - there was a kind of historical view before that denied the value of historical materials for no reason, which was completely based on imagination, imagining Li Zicheng as a man with both character and learning. Outstanding young people.But this view of history has forgotten that no outstanding young man with good character and learning would use a kitchen knife to kill people along the street.Since he dared to run rampant in the world and killing was useless, then Li Zicheng's personal conduct was inevitably unreliable.

In short, Chongzhen is in trouble. (10) You have prayed for five hundred years before the Buddha In the eleventh year of Chongzhen, Li Zicheng's bandits were defeated by officers and soldiers in Tongguan, and only a dozen of them fled into Yufu Mountain.So on the same day, Emperor Chongzhen and Li Zicheng both asked God for divination to calculate their own fate. Emperor Chongzhen made a big deal here, and set up a altar on the platform. Civil and military officials each fasted for three days. They were not allowed to eat meat, hug or kiss their wives, or even go to bed.After three days, clean hands and burn incense, under the leadership of Emperor Chongzhen, wait for the sound of Lun from heaven.At this time, I saw a sand table, and the pen was writing by itself.

Ninety-nine qi moves, Jingshui River, Weishui River throws Qin into Chu and makes Youyan.After several times of soldiers and bandits, they robbed the ministers and entered Chang'an.What is the suffering of the army, what is the suffering of the people, parents and wives throw each other away.Every family is emperor, everyone is emperor, the flood floods Wei and Qin Chuan.The rogues will stop for several years, and the red top will smoke again.Tigers and rabbits are at war, and it is a famine year between dragons and snakes. It is implied in the book that this prophecy tells that the downfall of the Ming Empire is just around the corner.Among them, flooding Wei, implying that Li Zicheng would soon flood Kaifeng.The loss of Qinchuan clearly means that Li Zicheng roared up Shaanxi, and the dragon ruled the world.The rogues are about to stop, which means that Li Zicheng's rogues will become a regular national army, and the red top is smoking, which means that the Manchus will also take advantage of this juncture to suddenly squeeze in... In short, the situation is not good, it is very bad... ...However, Li Zicheng didn't know the result of this divination. At this time, he was standing on the road, weeping and begging bitterly: "Brothers, I said brothers, don't go, don't leave me, please, I will take care of you." Can't you just call me Dad?"

It is useless to ask.At this time, due to Li Zicheng's failure, his generals no longer thought he was the real dragon emperor. General Liu Zongmin, headed by General Liu Zongmin, decided to go out of the mountain to surrender after discussion.Everyone knows that the policy of the imperial court has always been to not question the accomplices, but only to investigate the culprit. The culprit is Li Zicheng, and everyone is just an accomplice. If you surrender to the officers and soldiers, the government will eat, drink and entertain you, and you will pay travel expenses to go home. ... As for Li Zicheng, let the officers and soldiers arrest him and cut him into pieces. Who made him so troublesome? At that time, Li Zicheng was terrified. You know, he ruled the world because of such a group of hard-working murderers around him, but if everyone surrendered himself, what was he doing? In desperation, Li Zicheng was about to kill himself with a horizontal sword. At this time, a little dwarf with disabilities, a man named Song Xiance jumped out, and he suggested: "Anyway, everyone is not going to do it anymore, why not go to the mountain god for divination and ask the gods. If the three times are the best, That means that Li Zicheng is indeed ordered by the emperor, and everyone will follow him. But if the result of the divination is not good, then things will be easy to handle. Everyone cut off Li Zicheng's head on the spot and surrendered to the police. This is still an uprising. " So everyone came to the mountain temple. Li Zicheng knelt in front of the statue and asked for a lottery. The blacksmith Liu Zongmin stood beside him with his legs apart, holding the steel knife in his hand high. Next, cut off Li Zicheng's head... Crash, clatter, Li Zicheng shook the bamboo tube, and asked for the first lottery—the upper lottery. Huh la la la la, the second lottery - the upper lottery. Crash la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la, the third lottery... the last lottery. Hearing a "whoosh", Liu Zongmin had already chopped off with a single knife, and saw a human head flying a hundred meters away. whose head? Liu Zongmin's wife's. Everyone saw that the lottery was all right, and they believed that Li Zicheng would definitely be the emperor in the future.So everyone pulled out their knives, and, without any explanation, chopped their wives and daughters into pieces.It doesn't matter if you kill your wife. When the revolution wins in the future, there will be one female student per person... This group of people will always only consider their own enjoyment, and those who follow them, whether they are men or women, can only end in tragedy in the end. There are different teachings: Chongzhen formed a decisive battle on its own, prayed for 500 years before the Buddha, now go to Quantai to recruit the old department, and the flag is 100,000 and then bullshit.It is said that Emperor Chongzhen was at a loss as if he had obtained the murderous lottery.However, Li Zicheng won three consecutive draws, so he came out lightly and decided to die in the world. (11) Men and women are the same We have fifty witnesses here who will testify. Han Yu, Huang Liji, Li Guo, Sun Chengzong, Zhang Ruiguo, Shi Fenglai, Lai Zongdao, Li Biao, Zhou Daodeng, Cheng Jiming, He Ruchong, Wen Tiren, Zheng Yiwei, Qian Shengsheng, He Wuzhen, Zhang Zhifa, Kong Zhenyun, He Fengsheng, Liu Yuliang, Yang Sichang, Fang Fengnian, Fan Fucui, Zhang Sizhi, Yang Jingchen, Liu Hongxun, Qian Longxi, Zhou Yanru, Qian Xiangkun, Wu Zongda, Xu Guangqi, Wang Yingxiong, Wen Zhenmeng, Lin Jian, Huang Tujun, Fu Guan, Xue Guoguan, Cheng Guoxiang, Cai Guo Yong, Yao Minggong, Wei Chicheng, Xie Sheng, Jiang Dejing, Wu Sheng, Li Jiantai, Fan Jingwen, Chen Yan, Huang Jingfang, Wei Zaode, Fang Yuegong, Qiu Yu... Wow, a lot of witnesses, count them, one, two, three, four, five... a total of fifty.There are quite a few witnesses, but what are they trying to prove here? They want to prove that Chongzhen is really a woman... How do they prove it? They are the men that Chongzhen used to be... No, they are the famous Fifty Prime Ministers of Chongzhen in history.The so-called Fifty Prime Ministers of Chongzhen means that Emperor Chongzhen has been in power for 17 years. He has changed a total of 50 prime ministers, about three times a year, with an average of four prime ministers in office. moon. Obviously, Emperor Chongzhen regarded the court hall as a large shop for chariots and horses.The number of prime ministers appointed by Chongzhen alone is more than that of the 130 years after the founding of the Song Dynasty.There are so many prime ministers, but the term of office is so short, which explains at least three problems. 1. Chongzhen lacks trust in people, he doesn't trust anyone. 2. Chongzhen was acting on his emotions and had no reason at all. 3. Chongzhen must do what he wants to do, regardless of the consequences. These three characteristics can be summed up in one sentence, Chongzhen is a purely emotional person, and his thinking fits perfectly with many women in this world. When we say that Chongzhen is a woman, we don't mean that women are worthless.In fact, women are the most beautiful scenery in the world, but this scenery is obviously impossible to wrestle with Li Zicheng on the battlefield. What woman can bear the trick of rape and humiliation of women, and then chop off their hands and feet? In short, Chongzhen is too gentle, and Li Chuangchun's father and son, the battle between the two sides no longer has any suspense. In the fourteenth year of Chongzhen, Li Zicheng invaded Luoyang, Henan Province, and captured Fu Wang Zhu Changxun. Speaking of this Fu Wang Zhu Changxun, he has a lot of background. This person's nickname is Fuwa, and he was born to Concubine Zheng, the favorite girlfriend of Emperor Shenzong Zhu Yijun of Ming Dynasty. In the early years, Concubine Zheng made a big fuss in the Forbidden City. He wanted his son Fuwa to take over the position of prince, but Zhu Changluo took the lead and hired an assassin to assassinate him at his own expense. In the end, Fuwa was squeezed out and he came to Luoyang to become the local emperor.Now that this unlucky guy has fallen into the hands of the murderous Li Zicheng, he will be miserable. Li Zicheng ordered someone to bring Fuwa over, and after a closer look, he couldn't help being shocked. It turned out that the child Fuwa suffered from bulimia since she was a child, and she couldn't finish eating any delicious food.After binge eating Hesse, his whole body was like a big fat balloon that was inflated enough, and his weight reached 500 kilograms. It is said that when King Chuang saw that King Fu was so fat, he asked in surprise, "Oh my god, why are you so fat? Do you want to lose weight?" King Fu asked, "Do you have any effective weight-loss prescriptions?" Chuang Wang smiled and said: "Of course, our weight loss recipe has been tested a hundred times...Come here, help this buddy lose weight." Following King Chuang's order, a group of thugs had already rushed up, and without any explanation, they stripped off King Fu's body, put it in a pot and scrubbed it clean, and then spun off the fat from King Fu's body with a knife.King Fu howled loudly, blood gushing out, a little bandit had already brought a Liuli cup, took the warm blood, and handed it to Li Zicheng, Li Zicheng took it, and took a swig.Then he turned around and said: "Didi is fragrant, and the meaning is still unfinished..." While speaking, I saw steaming from the pot, and it turned out that King Fu had been steamed to death.All the rogues took the bowls and chopsticks and quickly occupied the seats, and ate King Fu to the brim. All the brothers ate their mouths full of oil, wiped their mouths happily, and asked Li Zicheng: "Boss, where should we eat next meal?" Kaifeng Mansion!Li Zicheng pointed with a long knife: "The Kaifeng mansion has a large population. The males are strong and the females are fresh and tender. You can eat as much as you want." (12) Fallen Leaves Return to Sad Eternal Autumn In the fourteenth year of Chongzhen, the rogue Li Zicheng drove hundreds of thousands of migrant workers, dug up the Yellow River, and submerged the ancient city of Kaifeng under the water. In Kaifeng's prefecture, more than a million people, men, women, and children, all turned into fish and turtles.The survivors were all looted by the bandits and threatened to kill and set fire. Emperor Chongzhen had no choice but to send deaf veteran Sun Chuanting to fight against Li Zicheng.Sun Chuanting was the number one fierce general in the Ming Dynasty.He set up an ambush in Jia County, trapping and murdering Li Zicheng to break in. At that time, ambushes rose from all sides, and the sound of killing was loud, surrounding Li Zicheng. Just open the bag, and shouted: "Take the magic weapon!" There was a "wow", and a dazzling array of gold, silver and jewels flew all over the sky.When the officers and soldiers who were ambushing and killing Li Zicheng saw them, they cried out ecstatically and threw themselves on the ground to grab the jewels. Li Zicheng waved his hand to Sun Chuanting: "Thank you..." He rode his horse away unhurriedly. When Emperor Chongzhen heard about this, he was overjoyed and immediately issued an order to send Jin Yiwei out of Beijing to kill Sun Chuanting.Minister Feng Yuanbiao wailed loudly in the court hall, claiming that he was willing to go to prison first and give Sun Chuanting a little time. It was obvious that Li Zicheng's thieves had already developed, and it was far from being able to kill them all in three or two days.If Sun Chuanting was unjustly killed at this time, wouldn't this be a great help to Li Zicheng? Emperor Chongzhen was very angry, he hated others disagreeing with him.In fact, according to the summary of historical facts, since Da Chongzhen became emperor, except for defeating Wei Zhongxian, none of his governance strategies have been able to match the way.All in all, although he temporarily gave up the method of killing Sun Chuanting with Jin Yiwei, he thought of another better way-he forced Sun Chuanting to fight against Li Zicheng. On October 6th of the 16th year of Chongzhen, Sun Chuanting and Li Zicheng faced off in Tongguan. Li Zicheng's bandits poured in overwhelmingly. From early to late, Sun Chuanting finally exhausted his strength and leaped his horse up a high slope. The horse neighed and died of exhaustion. on the ground.Sun Chuanting abandoned his horse and held a knife, and went downhill to kill.Seeing the black gangsters swarming in, and then dispersed in a short time, Sun Chuanting has disappeared—his body has not been found so far, so Chong Zhen firmly believes that Sun Chuanting must have defected to Li Zicheng.No gifts, no pensions, no wages in arrears, until the Qianlong period of the Qing Dynasty, the Jurchens gave Sun Chuanting a decent title. Unkind and ungrateful, this is Emperor Chongzhen. In the seventeenth year of Chongzhen, after the Fengyang earthquake, Li Zicheng ascended the throne in Xi'an, named Emperor Dashun.When Chongzhen got the report, he ordered someone to find a quack sorcerer to make a fortune. The sorcerer Zhan said: The emperor asks about the affairs of the world, and corrupt officials ask for money.There is chaos in all directions and seven places, and there is no smoke in nine miles.The people of Li are suffering, and the world is upside down.From now on, the war will start, and there will be no peace. Looking at the calculation of this hexagram, it is really too disrespectful to His Majesty. Seeing the hexagram, Chongzhen leaned over his desk and cried loudly.While weeping, I suddenly heard people yelling outside the city of Beijing. It turned out that Li Zicheng had come and asked to have a friendly talk with Chongzhen.After Chongzhen learned about it, he immediately delivered the decree—— Rehabilitate Wei Zhongxian, restore honor, and hold a grand memorial service. Reading history to this point, there are many people who are confused.He thought that Wei Zhongxian was the leader of the eunuch party that brought disaster to the country and the people, so why did Emperor Chongzhen, who was obsessed with obsession, engage in such a nameless deed when he was in danger? People who think this way are just because you don't understand Chongzhen, and what you didn't expect is that when Wei Zhongxian was killed, all the charges were fabricated in the first place.In the eyes of the world, Wei Zhongxian deserved death, but only Chongzhen knew Wei Zhongxian's injustice—at least, Wei Zhongxian's death was not a crime.Even though this guy deserved to be killed, he didn't set up a court to investigate the crime in detail, but fabricated the charge of rebellion—this is Wei Zhongxian's injustice. What's more terrible is Chongzhen's split personality. The alienated personality is a woman with a strong desire to submit. When he was young, he should have envied Wei Zhongxian the most. He killed Wei Zhongxian. Originally, patricide complex was at work. When Wei Zhongxian died , he realized that he was completely powerless to face the whole world.Especially at this particular moment, when outside the city was the vagrant army raging against the city, and inside the city were civil and military officials fleeing, this strong psychological pressure instantly compressed him back to the four-year-old child back then. Therefore, Chongzhen missed Eunuch Wei infinitely. It was out of infinite admiration and longing for Wei Zhongxian that Chongzhen authorized nearly ten thousand eunuchs to guard the capital.Then Chongzhen wrote on the book case: "All civil and military officials can be killed, but the common people must not be killed!" What does that mean? This sentence is telling Li Zicheng how he failed in Chongzhen.Although his statement was unreasonable, judging from the performance of the rogues in the future, Li Zicheng obviously accepted this statement. On March 18th, the eighteenth year of Chongzhen, Li Zicheng drove millions of bandits together, and the eunuch Cao Huachun opened the gate of Changhua to ask for surrender, so the bandits swarmed in.Amid the screams of killing, Emperor Chongzhen took the hand of the old eunuch Wang Chengen, climbed to Jingshan Mountain, and hanged himself on a tree next to the Shouhuang Pavilion. Historians commented that the unlucky Emperor Chongzhen had a very hard life.Why is he so miserable?Some people said that all the bad luck of the Ming Empire had happened to him, and there was nothing he could do about it.But the real reason is that bad luck distorted his character and made him the one who created bad luck. As a result, he lived in bad luck all his life, until this bad luck gradually expanded and broke through the empire's burden. bottom line. Let's not mention Chongzhen's life and his miserable childhood.Simply speaking, after he succeeded to the throne, he became the biggest trouble for the empire. He created far more problems for the empire than he solved. Now, can you find another person who is more troublesome than him?Some people are just like Chongzhen, it looks like they have worked hard and worked hard, but if you look closely at what they have done, it is nothing more than making the situation worse.In fact, not only Chongzhen has such a personality, but also his elder brother Ming Xizong, but Xi Zong knew his flaws, so he simply plunged into the carpenter's room and couldn't get out. Things got worse. Chongzhen didn't realize this until the last moment, but it was too late after all. The Ming Empire built by Zhu Yuanzhang himself had finally disintegrated.