Chapter 13 2. Seeking help and indifference

In October 1981, the Crown Prince and his wife paid a three-day visit to Wales.It was her first public appearance since becoming princess, at a dockside area in Wales.It had just rained at that time, and the enthusiasm of the welcoming crowd had not diminished in the slightest.Because this is the long-awaited first up-close look at the Crown Princess since their honeymoon with the Prince of Wales.However, what surprised the viewers of the Dauphine was that standing in front of them was no longer the slender, plump, sweet and pure girl at the wedding two months ago, but just a bony woman. From the first diplomatic occasion, Diana showed extraordinary diplomatic talent.

She graciously faced the thousands of people who poured out to greet her on the street, and kept walking through the crowd, shaking hands, accepting bouquets, and talking cordially, as if she had been used to it for 20 years. What the public saw was that the princess in the fairy tale came to them, contacted and talked with them, with the magic power of turning stones into gold, making them forget all the troubles in the world of mortals. Diana showed the kind and considerate side of her nature.She knows what kind of people she talks to and shakes hands with.Noticing a blind lady in the crowd, she reached out and took her hand.

"You have beautiful shiny medals," she said to a hunched veteran, then turned to the veteran's wife, "Did you polish them for him?" People were fascinated by this commoner fairy tale princess, crowds of people kept coming to witness her demeanor, and the media followed her closely so as to seize the best time to capture her smiles. Among them, the neglected one is naturally Prince Charles.In the past, he was definitely the center of everyone's attention and the focus of the lens, but today, he is just the protector of the focus. During the 3-day visit, wherever Prince Charles went to welcome the crowd on the side of the road and wanted to shake hands or talk to them, the crowd would immediately complain, saying that they came to see his wife of elegant demeanor. "In those days, I only had the role of holding flowers." "I know my role." He said several times in disbelief.Although he was still smiling when he said these words, he was still deeply disappointed after the smile.

Perhaps this was one of the reasons he was reluctant to praise Diana for her diplomatic success.For Diana, how she felt was another matter. She has been pregnant for 2 months, and her severe pregnancy reaction and her physical and mental condition made her unsuitable for such enthusiasm and love. During their stop-by-stop visit itinerary, Diana would often tell Charles, with tears in her eyes, that she had no energy left to go on.Too many times, she thought of her little apartment, of her innocent, carefree girlfriends. Charles also sympathized with his tearful new wife, but royal duty has no room for neglect or laziness.

During a parade, it rained heavily and the streets flowed into rivers, but people still flocked in. They were soaked and shivering non-stop.Diana felt like she was freezing too, and the umbrella didn't work at all, but she stayed and talked longer than usual, as if to repay people's kindness. Diana's first public speech was also during this visit to Wales. She gave a speech of thanks at the ceremony of awarding her the title of "Honorary Citizen" held at Cardiff City Hall, and also used a part of Welsh, which Charles also paid tribute to. Squeeze a sweat.After Diana completed the ceremony calmly, she discovered an unwritten rule of the royal family in frustration——no matter how hard you try and how well you do, you can never expect to hear from your husband or the royal family and courtiers. I heard half a word of praise.And in her new and lonely position, even a little praise would satisfy her and increase her self-confidence.

Someone once compared the love-giving and courting relationship between couples to the relationship between fish and water, so Diana is a fish swimming in the wrong place.Her life experience since she was a child made her a big whale. She needs a wide and gentle sea to swim freely, surrounded by a loving and friendly atmosphere, so that her true life can unfold freely and happily.This happened to be the happy time when she was eighteen or nineteen.But unfortunately, she swam into the royal family and became the princess. All the royal family needed was a beautiful little goldfish, and what was given to her was only a gorgeous, delicate and transparent crystal fish tank, which imprisoned her life .As for Charles, if his initial love for Diana was still a small pool, then he later simply became a dry desert, a side of cold ice.On the one hand, there is a cry for help, and on the other, apathetic indifference.What could be more unbearable than this?

Just after Christmas, Diana was three months pregnant.The pregnancy reaction is still very strong, especially in the morning, and the vomiting continues.This, coupled with Camilla's shadow, made her even worse, listless, but desperately trying to adjust herself to her new position and her fledgling family.But the prince seemed unable to understand her and comfort her when she needed help the most, which made the relationship between them estranged rapidly. From the couple's apartment at Sandringham there was a loud quarrel now and then, mingled with nervous female whimpers. To be fair, Charles did not deliberately ignore Diana at that time. He was born and raised in the royal family, and he had already integrated into this system. He could not understand Diana's troubles and hesitation, and could not bear her emotions and endless requests for family support.

But for Diana, from an ordinary girl, she became the Princess of Wales, became a mother, and became a beautiful doll under the spotlight from time to time.Adapting to so many new roles, she does need help from others.She sees Charles as a lifeline.In order to get her husband's help, she really "plays hard and soft": first she persuaded her with good words, then begged hard, and finally had to quarrel fiercely, but all efforts were of no avail.There was nothing she could do, Charles' indifference was like a rock. One day in January 1982, despite Diana's strong opposition, Charles continued his plan to go out for a horse ride.After arguing, she had no choice but to threaten with death.But Charles accused her of bluff and vexatiousness, and continued to pack up and go horseback riding at Sandringham.

In a fit of anger, she rolled down the stairs. The Queen Mother and several other people rushed to the scene when they heard the sound, trembling with fright at the scene before them.A local doctor was called in at once, while Diana's gynecologist, George Pink, was called and rushed from London to examine her.Thankfully, Diana suffered only an abdominal injury, and the fetus in her womb was unharmed.But Charles went riding as usual. Charles thought that Diana should have adapted to everything he had adapted to, and he never thought of marrying a Diana who became his burden and burden.

He didn't have to get to the root of his tantrums and quarrels, for Charles symptoms were trouble, tears were trouble, so when Diana shed tears, Charles ran away. The suicide was just the beginning of Diana's marriage nightmare.Every quarrel, will make their feelings more distant.Her friend James Gilbey believed her suicide was a cry for help, and she was devastated.During the years of their marriage, she attempted suicide several times and claimed to do so several times.Once at Kensington Palace, she banged her head on a glass bookcase.Another time, she cut her own wrist with a razor blade.She even committed suicide with a serrated lemon knife.Another time, when she had a heated argument with Prince Charles, she grabbed a small knife on the dressing table and stabbed herself in the chest and legs, causing blood to flow immediately.Although this also caused her husband to bleed in the fight, the crown prince still spoke coldly, accusing her of being vexatious.Shortly afterward, her sister Jenny visited her and was shocked to find the scars on her body.

A friend who saw their deterioration throughout noted: "It was his callousness that pushed her to the brink of death. In fact, he was able to make her happy. What the public thought was a fairy-tale perfection." Marriage is supposed to bring glory to the world. Although we don't blame him himself, at least we should blame him for his ignorance, education and his withdrawn character that is not good at getting along with others. Diana just became his character A victim of flaws." The differences in age, interests and temperament also inevitably caused tension in their marital relationship. After marriage, Diana often sat alone in the deep palace.As a prince, Charles always has various affairs, and his secretary and attendants constantly seek him to discuss important matters.Big changes can't change Charles' arrangement.Sometimes Charles would tell Diana: "My dear, I want to have lunch with my mother." Lunch is the time for the royal family to discuss important matters. No one seems to think it necessary to invite Diana to suffer this kind of punishment. She doesn't understand anything anyway.How can Diana have an appetite when she is left alone to eat? Diana was disappointed to find that the days of enjoying the sunshine and sea breeze freely during her honeymoon were gone forever, and the prince no longer stayed by her side every step of the way.What made her even more sad was that she found out that the most important person in the prince's life was not her, but his mother.A deep sense of loss welled up in her heart.Diana's jealousy often got out of control by Charles doing everything he was used to.Once, the prince drove out to have lunch with the queen, and after Diana's entreaties failed again, she almost lost her self-control. She chased the prince's car and yelled in front of the Buckingham Palace guards.Another time, in front of the servants, Diana shouted hoarsely: "You are also a husband! What kind of husband are you!" She told Charles about her loneliness and loneliness, and begged him to take her back to her home in London, in her familiar living environment, among her familiar friends and relatives.But in order not to violate the Queen's wishes, Charles did not agree to her request. In frustration, she burst into tears several times for no reason, leaving the servants puzzled.She complains that Charles doesn't understand her.He would rather go out riding, hunting, and chatting with his mother than with her. Charles, too, was caught off guard by his new wife and was left bewildered.He was trained from an early age not to reveal his emotions in public, and felt incomprehensible and embarrassed by Diana's various emotional expressions.He once asked his good friend Lawrence van der Post to comfort Diana, but the effect was not obvious. Diana's behavior is a headache.She complained constantly and was uncooperative about her royal obligations.Charles kept it from the Queen Mother that he knew that if it wasn't handled well, things would only get worse. One day, Diana went to Charles in the study, said she was not feeling well, and insisted that he accompany her.Charles suggested that she lie down and get a doctor for her, but she insisted on not wanting a doctor and asking Charles to accompany her.Charles told her again softly that he had a lot of work to do and had to go out, which was his responsibility.This exasperated her, and she screamed at him, "Duty! Duty! You think of your duty. Now is the time you should think of me. I'm your wife!" room, shut the door heavily. This touched Charles a bit, and he began to let her go.Charles' thoughtfulness made it easier for Diana.But Diana's behavior annoyed many of the surrounding staff.Charles' private secretary had complained to Charles, and Charles' reply was that this was the only way to make her happy, and that would last until she gave birth. Regarding what Diana did, Charles' private secretary reported directly to the queen, and the queen quickly sent her maid to "advise" Diana, saying that the royal family has their responsibilities and code of conduct, which cannot be changed by anyone of.Charles told the Queen that there was no irreconcilable conflict between their husband and wife, but that Diana couldn't adapt to the new life and the press was following her all the time.He was worried that the poor mood of the pregnant woman would be detrimental to the unborn little prince, and suggested that she should be given a certain amount of time and a peaceful life so that she could get better. At that time, the press was monitoring Diana's every move, catching any news of the royal couple's discord.Therefore, whether it is for the physical and mental health of pregnant women and unborn children, or for the majesty of Buckingham Palace, the Queen decided to intervene in the press. The Queen's press secretary, Mike Shea, planned the event. Before Christmas in 1981, Buckingham Palace invited journalists from various newspapers, TV stations, and radio stations to a dinner, hoping that they would stop disturbing the princess and allow her to have her own private life.The queen chatted with the reporters in person, so that the reporters understood that the princess, who had never lived in public since childhood, could not stand the siege of the camera.What people say about her, even though people care about her, is actually seriously interfering with her life, especially now that she is pregnant.Sure enough, after the meeting, they allowed the princess to live in peace for a few days. But all news and pictures about Diana are the selling points of newspapers and magazines, and soon the press began to chase this cash cow again. Their hobbies are also one of the reasons for their estrangement. Diana, who was kind by nature, thought it shameful and cruel to use a live bird as a shooting target.She tried to persuade Charles not to kill those cute birds, but the prince ignored him, and she stopped participating in this kind of shooting game since then.Charles thought she was being vexatious and was very angry about it.Worse, she embarrasses him in front of his family and the public. One morning, Charles went to a shooting event with his parents as planned.He wanted Diana to join him.But Diana refused and persuaded Charles not to go either.The prince thought he had agreed, so he had to go.The two quarreled, and Charles left regardless of Diana.But when the prince was waiting for his parents at the door, Diana rushed to the window and shouted to Charles hoarsely: "You bastard, let me be alone at home again, you can go if you want!" Both the queen and her husband Prince Philip could hear clearly Chu. Diana also hated hunting and considered it a crime to kill innocent animals.Unfortunately, hunting and shooting is exactly what the royal family loves and excels at.Being out of tune with the hobbies of the royals will only drive them further apart. Diana had been afraid to ride a horse since she fell off her horse at the age of 10.Charles had wanted to help her ride horses again to find common interests and improve their relationship.But Diana tried, but couldn't overcome her fear, and she gave up. Quarrels between newlyweds are inevitable, known as the running-in period.But Charles and Diana's marriage was a tug-of-war, with each trying desperately to draw the other to their side, to their own way of life.Charles has all the royal family members and their habits, regulations, and hobbies, while Diana is afraid of this kind of life and wants to take Charles to flee with her.She was fighting alone, and if she had any helper, it would be the unborn little prince.There is no doubt that she lost, but it also brought a great shock to the lackluster royal family. Charles didn't succeed either, and he became discouraged, finding that he and the new princess lacked the basis for a life together.As the heir to the British throne, he knew that divorce was impossible and he could only maintain a superficial marriage.The worst-case scenario is separation.