childhood After school, a group of little boys gathered at the gate of my yard, shouting in unison: The yellow-haired girl went to the market, Buy a radish and use it as a pear. Take a bite, damn hot, Tell you the yellow-haired girl to pick the big one! Amidst the booing, a little girl with yellow hair "whoosh" ran towards the house.that's me. I had two nicknames when I was a child, "Golden Monkey" and "Romanian".Because I have blond hair, pale skin, and a big nose.I hate these two nicknames, I hate myself, why I look different from others. My mother told me: "Your hair will turn black when you are 18." Because her blond hair turned black when she was 18, and the aunt who raised her when she was a child even gave her crow meat.My mother is from Henan.It is said that in Kaifeng, Henan Province, a branch of Jews came in during the Song Dynasty, and they reproduced and assimilated for generations, so there are many descendants with yellow hair and white skin in Henan.I think I might be one of them.

girlhood I have grown into a fat girl, and "look thin" is my only aesthetic standard for clothes.On the fifth floor lived a beautiful and slender girl, Xiaohong, who was my good friend. Every day when I came home from school, the first thing I did was raise my neck and call her to come down and play.All the boys looked at her, surrounded her, admired her, and I was so willing to be with her that I was destined to be a person who would not be jealous. When I was rehearsing "Xi Shi" in the human arts class, my best friend Luo Lige played the heroine Xi Shi, and Wang Ji played the maid of honor, and there was a long monologue.In the script, there is a bracket after her long monologue, and in the brackets it says "Lady B panicked".I am Maid B, and only these 6 characters in the whole script belong to me.But I don't mind that at all.

youth After graduating from the humanities and arts class, I participated in the drama "Happy and Happy Events" and won a grand prize from the Ministry of Culture.I was the only young actress among the winners, and I got the bonus and got a promotion.In the same dressing room as me, there was an actress in her 40s. She "asked" my classmates in front of me that day: "Hey, the ones who got promoted this time in your class are all the ones who are very flattering and special A hypocrite, huh?" After hearing this, I burst into tears. At that time, I "hated" to death this woman who respectfully called her "teacher" every day.I secretly made up my mind to puncture her bicycle tire tomorrow.A narrow-minded person like her will definitely be mad.

But the next day I completely forgot about it.The third day and the next few days also did not remember. After a long time, I met her again.She looked kindly, took my hand and asked, "How are you, Dandan? What are you up to?" I realized that I never actually hated her.I don't hate people, so I'm always happy. middle age One day my father called me and told me, "Dandan, woman, don't be too strong." It’s a painful experience, I think that in the past, I was indeed too capable, too domineering, and too “smart”, which is exactly what my dad meant by “powerful”.To love someone is to pamper him like a child for a long time, let him do what he likes and happy things, let him live a relaxed life, and make him laugh when he thinks of me.

Sometimes my husband and his friends go out to eat, or play out late, I must not call to ask.I will send him a text message: "Leave the door for you, keep the lights on for you, don't think about me, I'm asleep." Soon, his text message came back: "Da Nier is my eternal and complete favorite." In middle age, I finally learned how to love. When I talked with my husband, I never shy away from our previous failed marriages. I gradually understood that those people and things that made me angry and thought "unforgivable" actually had their own reasons.I understand Yingda, he is still a smart person and a good person in my heart.If his character is not perfect, it is because he suffered too much in childhood, and his parents were imprisoned during the "Cultural Revolution".He has no adult protection and no love.I also understand other people who hurt me.Because of the different growing environments, different people you come into contact with, different personalities, and different luck, you cannot ask everyone to be kind and full of rationality when dealing with problems.