Chapter 12 Chapter 12 Love and Loyalty Are the Most Important and Sacred Values ​​of Human Beings

As a friend, I don't want gold Or brilliant presents please him, but sit next to him and let him hold my hand I wonder if money makes people blind to great treasures. He is your acre of field, You sow with love, Reap with gratitude. He is your table, your bed, Let you have refuge when you are hungry, Hunt him down for peace. ——Poetry written by a patient of "AIDS Home" in New York (excerpt) Love and loyalty are the most important and most sacred of human beings On February 1, 1965, the approval of the Pope finally passed to Mother Durham through the Bangladesh Bishops' Conference.

That is to say, from this day on, the Missionary Sisters of Charity no longer belonged only to the poor in India, it also became a congregation of other poor people all over the world.And from this day on, the nuns can go to all parts of the world to serve all the poor in the world.Not only that, if there are poor people on the moon, they will work tirelessly to get there. This is a day of joy and a day of great importance.This day came so quickly, in fact, it exceeded Sister Duran's expectations and expectations.Generally speaking, it takes about 30 or 40 years of hard work for a local religious order to become an international religious order directly under the Pope's jurisdiction.As for the Missionary Sisters of Charity, it has only been 15 years since it was formally established in 1950.

This is undoubtedly a special grace.Mumu deeply understands that the Lord has chosen her again, and she still has a greater mission to fulfill.If she is a living testimony of God's love for mankind, then it is her duty to make this testimony visible or heard throughout the world. That night, in a courtyard in a Calcutta slum, by moonlight and starlight, Mum delivered an important address to her nuns.Mumu said: "Our efforts are an important thing for the world, so we must shoulder this mission to make our actions more effective. Thank you for the grace of the Lord, let us continue to serve the poorest Serve the poor! Our purpose is to please Jesus Christ who came to the poor."

This year, Mother Delam was 55 years old. At this time, although the number of members of the Missionary Sisters of Charity has reached about 100, compared to those international major religious orders with a long history and the grand goal that Mumu is determined to achieve, 100 nuns are obviously far from enough.If the light of love of the Missionary Society of Charity is to spread throughout the world, then she needs more nuns and monks, as well as the participation and help of more people in society. Soon, we will be amazed to see that she has done all of these. It was also from this day that people began to officially call her Mother Teresa, or Mumu--Mother Teresa.Although before that, many people had already called her that out of respect or love for her, but from this day onwards, this title began to become formal.And with the passage of time, her age gradually increased, and the benevolence she bestowed became wider, deeper, and more widespread, and she really became an out-and-out nun, or sister-in-law.

According to Catholic practice.Generally, only the president of a congregation, or a recognized elder, or the dean of a convent, can be qualified to be called Mother, which is what we call a nun, or a nun. It really didn't matter to Sister Durham whether she was called a nun or a nun or a sister.What is important is that the approval from the Pope enabled the Sisters of Missionary Charity to develop rapidly from this day, and even spread all over the world. Therefore, this is not just a change of title. In fact, there is one thing that Mumu understands very well, that is: she knows that what she and this congregation have done is very small and limited compared to the endless suffering in the world, just like a drop of water in the ocean .

But the ocean is made up of drops of water.If they don't sprinkle this drop of nectar, the sea will always lack a drop. She also knows that no matter which country you are in, the government is trying to find ways to help those who are poor and needy.But she felt that this was not enough. She had to provide these people with another thing, a kind of food for the soul—the love of God. A member of the U.S. Congress asked Mumu Duran: "In this difficult place in India, will your efforts succeed?" Mumu replied: "Mr. Congressman, I am not pursuing success, I am only pursuing loyalty. That's all."

In Mumu's eyes, love and loyalty are the most important and sacred qualities of human beings, as well as the most important and sacred commitments.There is great power in loyalty, whether it is loyalty to people or loyalty to God. You help the nuns to live in poverty On July 6th of this year, the first non-Indian congregation was established in Corate, Venezuela. This is the first Missionary Sisters of Charity to be established outside India and thus has special significance. Before 1965, although Mother Duran was already a household name in India, few people knew and understood her in other countries and regions outside India. There are not many people.

But there is still one person who knows her and her congregation very well. This person is Bishop Goo, who was originally from Australia and later served as an ambassador in India. During the Vatican meeting, Bishop Goo happened to sit next to a bishop from Venezuela. He frequently talked about So much so that the bishop of Venezuela had the idea of ​​inviting the Mother to start a synagogue in his diocese. That was exactly what Sister de Ram had planned, and besides, she would be there to train nuns working in Spanish-speaking areas.The mother tongue of the Missionaries of Charity is English, so in the entire congregation, only a few people can speak Spanish, so 4 nuns were sent to Venezuela.

On July 26, the nuns arrived in Cocorat.It was a completely different and completely unfamiliar place, and it took a lot of effort for the nuns to get used to it.To welcome them, the local church has prepared a spacious house, a brand new refrigerator, and other furniture.But Sister Delam just glanced at these things, and said: "The poor people in Kekerit don't have refrigerators, and they don't have such beautiful houses. I know all this, so you don't have to hide it from me." But the organizers accepted the donations on behalf of Mumu before she arrived.But Mumu didn't care, and Mumu said, "The nuns themselves don't need refrigerators, or washing machines."

They argued with her, saying: "This place is very hot, you know that, and it's the dog days, we hope you can come in handy, even if the nuns don't use it now, maybe in the future. At least it can be used Save the medicine." But the sister replied, "Well, if later they need these things for the sake of the poor, the Lord will take care of them then, but they don't need them now." Everyone had to compromise. Before Mumu arrived in Venezuela, she knew that the problem of unwed mothers was very serious in Cocorit.So Mumu decided to buy a piece of land there and build a center for unwed mothers.Government authorities are also supportive.However, when Mumu was negotiating with the land owner about the transfer price of the land, the person actually offered a sky-high price of 5 million renminbi.At that time, 5 million renminbi was roughly equivalent to 1 million US dollars. Mom was very shocked. She stretched her hand to the sky and said firmly: "No!" Then she said in a very small voice to the person accompanying her: " They never think about the poor."

When she returned to the monastery, the mother could not shake off the shock. She said: "My God, I can't imagine what will happen if we accept this waste that is harmful to the poor." ?” In Sister Delam's consciousness, every penny of the Sisters of Charity belongs to the poor, and she has no right to dispose of it at will.Someone once said: Money is the devil's excrement.But for Mother Duran, every penny is very precious, because only with money can she truly love the poor. If there is no money, the so-called helping the poor will be empty words. Every penny above, but not for herself.In this matter, she was never like some hypocrite who pretended to be otherworldly and regarded money as dung.She gratefully accepts every penny and gives generously to the poor until nothing is left. If in South America in the 1960s, it was acceptable for Mumu to reject refrigerators, then in Spain in the 1980s, Mumu once again rejected refrigerators and washing machines, which is hard for ordinary people to accept. A young Chilean woman living abroad in Spain sent refrigerators, washing machines, TVs, water heaters, chairs and other furniture to the newly established congregation because she was eager to return home and out of love.Seeing the enthusiasm of the young women, the co-workers accepted it.When Mumu comes, they hope that Mumu will not refuse.Because at that time, these electrical appliances were nothing in Madrid, and they were basically popular even in the poorest communities. But Mumu still refused. Three days later, Mumu was leaving Madrid for Yugoslavia. When she was showing her passport and boarding pass, a co-worker came up to her and said, "Don't worry, nun, we will take care of your nun." The co-worker thought that sister would say, "Thank you", or something like "Yes, don't let them lack anything", but to the surprise of everyone present, what sister said was: "You can Help the nuns to live in poverty." Why did Mother Teresa repeatedly instruct the co-workers to protect the poverty of the nuns?This is because, whether it is Detroit in the United States or Madrid in Spain, they are completely different from India, especially Calcutta.If it's not too difficult to be poor in Calcutta -- the whole society is poor -- it's more difficult to be poor in the very rich countries of the West that the Order requires. However, to persevere in poverty for life is a holy vow that every nun of the Missionary Society of Charity must adhere to. Mother said: God’s poverty is to liberate us from material concerns and material possessions, and then, With such freedom, to keep love in one place. In fact, the nuns did it all.Not just in Venezuela, or in Madrid, but in every branch that was established successively, the nuns lived a very simple life. There were no electric fans in summer, no heating in winter, no refrigerators and washing machines, no personal watches, and sometimes even soap. And brushes are not. But the poverty of the nuns does not just stop at the material level, it also conveys a message to us: that is, to respectfully admit to the Lord our own fragility, incapacity and non-existence, and at the same time accept this fragility, incompetence and non-existence.Because of poverty, we must rely on, and we must entrust, that is, completely surrender ourselves to the Lord, and at the same time absolutely trust in the care of the Lord, and always rejoice and be happy about it.This is the basic conduct that a nun must possess. There is a wonderful little story that I must share with you. One afternoon, a poor woman came to the convent in Cocoraite and asked the nuns to give her $200.She said she needed the money urgently.This was all the property the nuns could manage on their own at the time.Although the nuns did not know her, they gave her the money without asking for any proof. Not long after, a tall young man came from the street. He knocked on the door, gave the nuns a sum of money, and left without saying anything.The nuns opened it and found that it was exactly 200 US dollars.no doubt.The nuns didn't know him either. Only love is the ingredient of my revolution In 1966, the Missionary Sisters of Charity began to open various large and small centers all over the world.If before the nuns and nuns were just running around in India, now their footprints have started to travel all over the world, and they have really become running nuns. Not only that, but they are active doers and great organizers.From earthquake sites, wind disasters, and flood sites, to plague-endemic areas, war refugee camps, and even the frontiers of war; from leprosy patients, AIDS patients, war disabled, and lonely and desperate people; from Asia to Africa, and then to the Americas ,Europe.Wherever there is suffering, they appear there. That is to say, wherever someone shouts "I am thirsty", they will bring God's love there. In their view, their mission in this world is to show God's love for this world with their lives, and God's continual mercy for mankind.And for them, it doesn't matter who is saying "I'm thirsty," it's actually the same voice that is saying "I'm thirsty." Mother Delam said: "There are many ways to make human beings happy. Reducing the population and developing technology are all possible, but if people ignore the voice of "I am thirsty" on the cross, then none of them will work. will actually work, and may even backfire." She always believes that the blessings that God bestows on this world are actually enough for all people to enjoy happily, but people's extravagance and waste cause the poor to lose this right.This kind of waste includes both material profligacy and spiritual irresponsibility. Now, let's take a look at how the Missionaries of Charity have established chapters around the world. In 1966, a children's home was established in Mumbai, and a leprosy sanatorium was established in Agra. In addition, the nuns began to go to Benares, known as the holy place of Hinduism, to perform charity work. In December 1967, a home for the poor was built in Colombo, Sri Lanka. This was the first place for the poor opened by the Missionaries of Charity on the equator. Then, at the special request of the Pope, the sister flew to Rome in person and established a convent in the poor areas of Rome. It was August 1968. A personal letter from Pope Paul VI was delivered to the headquarters of the Missionaries of Charity in Calcutta. In addition to two air tickets, there was also a check for more than 10,000 US dollars and a A Brief Account of the Dire Conditions of the Diocese of Rome.A few weeks later, Sister Teresa arrived in Rome with a nun named Federico.The problem in Rome's favelas is different from elsewhere. The families here are mostly from the south of Italy. They hope to find high-paying jobs in Rome, but in fact, most of the husbands' salaries are only enough to pay the rent.As a result, mothers who have young children to care for have to go out to work.In response to this situation, Mumu built a kindergarten in addition to a medical center here. In September 1968, Africa's first poor centers were opened in Tabora, Tanzania and near Mount Kilimanjaro.In the same month, Mumu established a convent in Polk, Australia. In 1969, a world-wide association, the "Delam International Collaborators Association" was formally established. The purpose of this organization is to make everyone in the world pay attention to the plight and needs of the poor, and then use Delam The spirit of Tom, to truly care and give.They wrote in the chapter: To this day, when Jesus comes to his place, even those who belong to him do not recognize him.He came into the emaciated bodies of the poor, and sure enough he also came into the rich who were nearly overwhelmed by wealth, into their lonely hearts, if they had no one to love them. In April 1970, some nuns went to Canada to build a seminary and a center for the poor in Winnipeg.Another five nuns went to Melbourne, Australia under the leadership of Sister Durham. In July of the same year, the nuns went to Jordan and began to work among the poor who believed in Islam.There they care for the physically handicapped, as well as abandoned children.In order to take care of the refugees in the Gaza Strip, they travel between Jews and Arabs every day, making great efforts to alleviate the suffering of the refugees.Muslims there respectfully call them "pilgrims" because they, dressed in white robes, are like the pilgrims to Mecca. A particularly memorable date was December 8, 1970, when a junior college in London was officially opened.This was the first Junior College established by the Missionaries of Charity outside of Calcutta. Since the Missionary Sisters of Charity became an international congregation directly under the Pope, many young girls from all over the world came to Calcutta in pursuit of Mother Teresa.But the Calcutta monastery could not accommodate so many suitors, so Mother opened such a junior college in London to place and nurture girls who were full of pious desire for Christ. By 1971, there were Missionaries of Charity houses even in wealthy America, even in the Bronx, New York.The nuns set up day care homes in neighborhoods where the evil forces are everywhere, take in the mentally ill, help the poor, sick and frightened people, and go to the prison to visit the felons who have been abandoned by their families. A few years later, Sister Andrea, a physician by training, took over as superintendent of the Bronx branch.One day, she found a man with sore legs on the street.She immediately realized that this person must be admitted to hospital immediately, so she called an ambulance.But it wasn't an ambulance that came, it was a police car -- ambulances have long considered this notorious area off-limits.As soon as the police got out of the car, they yelled at the man like a whore or a drunk. The man ran away and disappeared. Sister Andrea was very angry. She said to the police: "Sir, this man is me. Jesus, and what you just said was to Jesus." The policeman was amazed, he had never heard such a thing before.He immediately bowed his head and apologized to the nun, spent more than an hour to find the patient, and vowed never to treat anyone like this again. In 1972, the Missionary Sisters of Charity established a small convent and a center for the poor in Dhaka, the capital of Bangladesh. Just the previous year, in March 1971, the original East Pakistan declared its independence and named it "Bangladesh".Because of supporting East Pakistan, the contradiction between India and West Pakistan turned into a terrible war.The war led to a sharp increase in the number of refugees. Not long after, a terrible cholera broke out in the refugee camps on the Indian border. Mother Delam immediately went to the relevant government departments to ask for support, but the Calcutta government only wanted to protect itself under the circumstances at that time— - Take all measures to prevent refugees from entering.So Mumu had to lead a group of nuns to the refugee camp.Every nun knew they could be infected, but they had to go.After more than two months of hard work, cholera was finally brought under control. In 1975, the monks opened the first shelter in Vietnam. In 1976, the first contemplative branch of the Missionary Sisters of Charity was established in New York, and its nuns are called contemplative nuns, or Sisters of the Word. The main duty of contemplative nuns is to pray.Therefore, in addition to serving the poor for two hours a day, they spend the rest of the time in prayer.Including intercession for the nuns and monks of the congregation.The reason why the meditation branch was established in the United States instead of the Himalayas or other peaceful places is because Mumu believes that in the big cities of the world, especially in big cities like London and New York where things change rapidly, people are more You need silence and contemplation, and you need to find a "secret room" in yourself.For God speaks only when the heart is silent. In 1979, the congregation established its first branch in a socialist country.Starting from this year, even socialist countries such as Ethiopia, South Yemen, Nicaragua, Cuba, and the former Soviet Union, where missionaries were strictly prohibited from entering, began to allow the Missionary Society of Charity to open reception centers there. Since 1980, all of the Missionaries of Charity's shelters have been opened to drug addicts, prostitutes and abused women. That is to say, since this year, the shelter centers of the Missionary Society of Charity outside India have expanded to Lebanon, West Germany, Mexico, Brazil, Peru, Kenya, Belgium, New Guinea, as well as the Philippines, Haiti, Argentina and other countries.The nuns run medical centers, drug distribution stations, asylum centers, and poor schools there. They live in dilapidated houses and eat simple meals, but they provide nutritious meals for local children afflicted by diseases. In 1985, the first AIDS hospital was established in New York. In 1988, in order to save people who were harmed by radiation due to a nuclear accident, Mother Delam went to Moscow in person and applied to the former Soviet government, prompting the establishment of a relief center near Chernobyl as quickly as possible. During this period, there was always a strong desire buried in her heart, that is, to do something for the poor in her hometown.However, due to the differences in social systems, her wish could not be realized—Sister Mumu’s hometown belonged to a socialist country at that time, and the Vatican had no diplomatic relations with the socialist country, so it was difficult for her application to be approved. It was not until 1991 that Mumu was allowed to establish a monastery in her hometown of Albania. After receiving this approval, Mumu was ecstatic, and she went there in person——it was the first time for her to go home in 60 years, and then she It took 4 months to build a shelter with 5 houses for the poor there. Beginning in 1977, nuns began to land in Taiwan and Hong Kong of our country, where they opened places to serve the poor. By the time of Mother Delam's death in 1997, the Missionary Sisters of Charity had opened more than 600 convents in 127 countries, with a total of more than 7,000 nuns and monks, including 4,500 nuns from 117 countries. In this country, a large number of nuns come from the middle class of India, and some are even noble ladies born in the Brahmin class. And in every monastery around the world, there is a beautiful statue of the Virgin enshrined in an important position.In this female congregation headed by Mother Teresa, Mary symbolizes holiness, purity, chastity, obedience and divine motherhood. She is a model for Mothers Teresa and all nuns, and is also the object of their fervent prayers.Mumu believes that worshiping the Virgin Mary is the spiritual way for women to reach Christ.When someone interviewed her about women holding important priesthoods, she answered with Mary, the mother of Jesus.She said "Mary could be the best priest, yet she claimed to be - and always has been - the Lord's handmaiden." From the above narration, it seems that Sister Durham's benevolent cause seems to be developing smoothly, as if she has never encountered any obstacles.But this is not the case. In 1980, Mother Delam came to Ethiopia with a few nuns. She planned to open a hospital for the poor in this country, but the arrogant governor was puzzled by this wonderful idea. To understand, he said to his sister domineeringly: "Don't you know that we are making a revolution? The purpose of our revolution is to solve these problems!" Mom smiled, and she replied calmly and calmly: "I am also a Revolutionary, but nothing but love is what makes me revolutionary." In the mountains of Shimla in India, the Mumu faced fierce resistance from nature.The winter in Shimla is very cold, and the nuns have lived in hot and humid areas for a long time, and they could not resist the high cold in Shimla, so they had to withdraw completely. In Sri Lanka, no missionary has been granted an entry visa for more than ten years, but the nuns of the Missionary Society of Charity received an unexpected warm welcome.But this friendship did not last, and soon they were deported. The same thing happened in Vietnam and Northern Ireland, and of course it happened on the Cross Hill in Berlin. Some hooligans chased these young girls in white robes and shouted fiercely: "Go, go back to India!" In Naples, the Israeli-occupied area, five nuns took care of children and the elderly from the Palestinian refugee camps. In that extremely dangerous and difficult environment, they were also threatened from all sides. Even the Palestinians threw stones at them in the beginning. But these setbacks, large and small, could not stop the nuns from rushing forward.Sister Delam said: "There is no place in this world where there is no poverty and injustice." As long as there are people stretching out their weak hands, yearning for love and sympathy, then their busy steps will not stop.In the eyes of the nuns: there is only one world, and that is the kingdom of God, and the kingdom of God on earth is also his kingdom in heaven. Therefore, for them, there is no so-called material and spiritual existence in this world. Separated, they only live for that one world - the Kingdom of God. light up the lamp of life The situation in London and New York is very different from India, and even from Rome, where, though the same people are troubled by material poverty, there are many more affluent people who shut themselves up in comfortable dwellings. Inside, completely isolated from the outside world, no one will know until death.Some were not discovered by indifferent neighbors until days, or even weeks, after their death.Because the stench of rotting corpses makes them unable to live safely. In New York, when the nuns visited a house once, they found that the woman who lived there had been dead for many days, and the neighbors didn't even know her name. In this regard, Mother Delam said: "There are many people in the world who are eager for a small piece of bread, but more people are eager for a little bit of love. Poverty in the Western world is a different kind of poverty-not only because We are lonely and poor, and we are poor because we are poor in heart and poor in spirit." Sister then said: "We understand that being rejected is the most serious disease. This is the real poverty that is happening around us in today's world. .” And all the poor in spirit, to Mother, are just another hungry Christ. Although Britain is a welfare state, people will not be bothered by physical hunger, but many people die desolately in the lack of love.Sister Teresina, who has worked in the UK for a long time, said: "Some people simply don't know who to contact." Behind the brick wall, there are many lonely souls who desperately need comfort.Therefore, the nuns not only provide hot food to the homeless in London and Liverpool, and find stoves and furniture for the poor living in shabby apartments, but also do everything possible to find those who are lonely in heart, and those who are surrounded by crowds and people. Those whom society has forgotten, bring them back into the world through interviews and other means that make them acceptable.For example, short-distance travel and other activities were held. Once, the Missionary Society of Charity in London even rented 6 large buses, carrying more than 300 people on a trip. One day, Sister Durham was walking on a bustling street in London. By chance, she caught a glimpse of an old man sitting alone by the side of the street.Mumu walked over instinctively and held the old man's hand.Then there was a long silence, and when the old man looked up, Mu Mu saw that his face was covered with tears.The old man said, "For many years, I have never held such a pair of warm hands." In this regard, Mumu said: "In England, people suffer from loneliness and being rejected. There is no shortage of bread here, but there is a lack of interest and enthusiasm for people. Compared with the poor in Calcutta, they live in another place. In a kind of poverty. For us, this is also Christ, another Christ of hunger. If the British are to treat the poor with love and kindness, then they must first understand who the real poor are, otherwise, their love will fall Not really." In Germany, Indian nuns in white robes can be seen at any time for many years at the Munich train station and Marianne Square in the city center.There, the nuns not only cared for the homeless and street teenagers, but also visited the mentally ill and alcoholics, and held evening prayers for the lonely. The nuns do all kinds of work, but sometimes they don't do anything. For a whole morning or an afternoon, they just sit, listen, or comfort -- have a long talk with those who are lonely. Such people hide in every corner of the city and are ignored by busy people, but the nuns always have a way to find them. A Berlin reporter wrote: "On Mother Teresa's visit list, there are 50 complete An old man that no one knows, living between the tall buildings and stone walls of the capital." In Sister Ruwena's opinion, in Germany, no one really dies of starvation because the government's public services are done very well.But why do so many people keep coming to them?Because only with the nuns.They feel welcome, respected and recognized. In New York, USA, the Missionary Sisters of Charity regularly provide opportunities for lonely people to get together during several times of the year, so that they can get in touch with others in this social gathering, because most lonely people All a man needs is someone to sit beside him, talk to him, smile at him.On this special day, what the congregation can provide them is a simple lunch and some ordinary pastries.But they get a lot of happiness and satisfaction from it.So many people are looking forward to this special day. In the free cafeteria specially set up by the congregation for the homeless, many people rushed here not to eat, but to feel the peace and warmth.That is to say, what they need is not just food, they also need to be in contact with people, to be recognized and accepted - to be loved. Once, in Melbourne, Australia, Sister Durham visited an old man who had been completely forgotten.When Mumu walked into his room, she saw a mess inside and wanted to clean it up for him.But the old man said, "No, Sister, that's fine," and Mother said nothing, but sat quietly with the old man until he finally changed his mind. There was a delicate but dusty lamp in the room, and Mumu asked, "Why don't you light it up?" The old man replied: "Who should light it for? Anyway, no one comes to see me, and I don't need a lamp myself." Mum said, "What if the nuns come to see you? Can you light a lamp?" As a result, the old man replied: "Yes, if I hear a human voice, I will turn on the light." Later, the lonely old man asked a friend to bring a word to Mrs. Durham, he said: "Please tell my friend, she lit the lamp of my life, until now, this lamp has been on." Mumu said: "These people need us to know. If we know them, we will love them, and love will lead us to serve them. We can't just be satisfied with giving money, money is not enough. They need more We reach out, we need to love them with our hearts, and that's the most important thing." AIDS Home Among the various charitable and religious groups, the Missionary Sisters of Charity was one of the first Catholic organizations to accept AIDS patients.Still in August of] 9?4, Sister Delam went to visit the men's shelter home in London and saw that there were still two vacant rooms there, so she told Teresi, who was in charge of the affairs of the British Isles and Ireland, "Save these two rooms for AIDS patients," said Sister Na. This is the first time that Mother Delam has issued instructions to her nuns to help AIDS patients—this is the unique working method of Mother Delam, even if a major decision is made, it does not need to be discussed through a meeting.Sister Teresina always remembered the look on the mother's face when she was standing in the empty room, she said, "It seems like a flash of inspiration, the congregation mother suddenly said that sentence." Afterwards, Sister Teresina started trying to make it happen in London, but it was not easy.But it didn't take long before they finally got a helper, a brave AIDS patient who had quit alcohol and drug addiction. Through him, the nuns began to take in some AIDS patients who were homeless and unable to take care of themselves. At the same time, in New York, the nuns of the Missionary Society of Charity also began to regularly visit some hospitals and nursing homes to visit AIDS patients who came from prisons.These patients are often helpless and full of distress. In 1985, with the help of Cardinal O'Connor, the congregation finally opened an "AIDS Home" in New York, the first "AIDS Home" of the Missionary Sisters of Charity.The goal of the nuns is simple, to give AIDS patients a warm home, at least to give them a sense of home.In the eyes of the nuns, a beautiful family that cares for each other will have a therapeutic effect on a patient, which cannot be achieved by drugs, and even more irreplaceable by drugs. Sister Dolores said: "It is very difficult for patients to be calm at the end of their irresistible life. We spend a lot of time creating a family atmosphere for them. Everyone gathers to eat, chat, pray together, and play games. The family also takes care of each other, like brothers and sisters, many people have experienced wonderful changes in it, and some people have given up the previous rejection and hostility towards the family and began to rebuild a beautiful relationship with their families." One patient, from Puerto Rico, was terrified when he first arrived, unable to accept the fact that he was about to die.After a while, he gradually calmed down as he saw other patients spend their last moments peacefully under the care of the nuns.Later, his mother came to pick him up, but he asked to stay.He said to Sister Dolores, "I know you will hold my hand when I die." It's that simple.即将死亡的病人为他们得到的爱而感动，而这爱，不过是一次手的碰触，或一杯水，或一个温暖的眼神。 多罗瑞丝修女说：“许多来到这里的病人，一开始非常地沮丧和绝望，但经过一段时间的悉心照料，他们的心便找到了和平。”因此多罗瑞丝修女说：“在这里，只要有爱就足够了。” 修女们把爱看成是对病人的一种心灵治疗。它使病人们获得了一种珍贵的东西，即心灵的和平。而且，这种心灵的治疗，不仅改变了被治疗者，也使治疗者领受到了来自上主的爱与平安。有一个义工说：“在这里的工作，使我学习到此生中什么是最重要的事情，也使我明了，在今生之后还有来生，上主告诉我祂爱每一个人，因此，我有什么资格去评断他们？或是评断别人？每周一次的义工工作让我的生命更深沉、更丰富，也更能在物质和精神之间求取平衡，我已找到和平。” 从那以后，仁爱传教修女会开始在世界各地建立”艾滋病人之家”。修女们为艾滋病人服务的足迹遍及美国、印度、巴西、洪都拉斯、西班牙，葡萄牙、海地，等等。 在照料那些病人的时候，修女们从来不问他们得病的原因，也不对他们作任何的评断。她们知道，这是病人的秘密，也是他们最敏感最自尊的地方。很多人认为艾滋病是上天对人类的一种惩罚－－是人的自我放纵和毫无节制导致了这个病的产生。但德兰姆姆却说：“没有人可以下这个判断，这是上主的一个奥秘。” 她接着说：“我们只看见他们的困难和需要。他们需要我们照顾。就这么简单。我相信，主是在借着艾滋病向我们说话，他让我们有机会表达他的爱，和我们的爱。” 而长期在“艾滋病人之家”工作的多罗瑞丝修女甚至说：“我所接触的艾滋病人都是现代的圣人，是教会的新圣者。当他们逐渐在耶稣之中成长，他们最后的日子是如此美丽。对我而言，他们的故事就是圣人的故事。” 而在泰国的清迈，也有一个非常非常美丽的所在，叫The Agap。Home,意为“仁爱之家”或“圣爱之家”。在那里，那些玩耍嬉戏的孩子，看上去，跟平常的孩子没有分别，但事实上，那都是些身染艾滋病的可怜孩子。 在泰国，染上艾滋病的婴儿往往被母亲遗弃，因为她们无力抚养这样的孩子。子1 996年建立的Agape，就是专门收留被遗弃的艾滋病婴儿的一个机构， 有一个叫Julie BrUCe的女子，今年42岁，从15岁起，她就投身于帮助弱势儿童的事业。几十年来，她在很多慈善组织里做过义工，助养过一百多名孤苦的孩子。1997年，Julie从澳洲来到Agape，开始照顾那些可怜的孩子。 几年来，Julie亲眼看见病重的孩子无可挽回地死去，有的孩子甚至就死在她的手上。Julie说：“要坚持这个信念继续做下去是很困难的，但我不会因为其他事情而放弃留在Agape，更不会放弃爱这些孩子。” Agape是希腊文，意思是爱。而且是一种无条件的，完全包容的爱。Julie说：“当你走近Agape的大门，你就会感到那种发自内心的爱的力量。” 家是爱的源泉，爱是一切美德的灵魂 我们当中有这样一些人，向远方的人表达爱心很积极，比如热情地参加各种慈善募捐、志愿者活动等等，却对身边的人，甚至自己的父母，很冷漠。有个作家把这种行为称为“远程爱心”。作家不是说远程爱心不好，而是说，我们不能光有远程爱心。至少，在你关心远方的人时，你也多少关心一下身边的人，比如你的父母，比如你的伴侣，和你的孩子。如果你连身边的人都不爱，你又怎么可能真的爱远方的人呢？你所做的，不过是为了成就一种个人的功名而己。 实际上，我们很多人都是这样，爱远方的人似乎很容易，爱身边的人却很难。还有更多的人，因为渴求更多的个人成功和更大的个人发展，以致没有时间和精力去关怀父母，照顾子女，结果导致家庭瓦解，而瓦解的家庭，又给这个本来就不够和谐的世界带来了更多的不安和扰乱。 因此，在西方很多富裕的国度里，很多人实际上是生活在一种精神和心灵的深度贫穷里。比如有些青少年，他们的父母因为忙于工作而无暇照管他们，或者，只顾及到他们的物质需要，而对他们的心灵需要不感兴趣，以至这些年轻的生命被焦虑、疑惑和巨大的虚无感所困扰，找不到生命的意义和价值。而另有许多老人，则在孤独和寂寞里孤零零地等死。因为做子女的根本无暇陪伴他们。 德兰姆姆认为，这是贫穷的另一种面貌。 慕尼黑的仁爱传教会曾经接到过一个奇特的求助电话：“我们只是渴望听见人的声音，只要是人声就好。”电话是一对老年夫妇打来的。这对老年夫妇虽然非常富有，但极其寂寞，他们虽有几个孩子，但没有一个孩子愿意陪伴他们。于是双眼半盲的老人在绝望之余给仁爱传教会打了一个电话，请求修会派修女去看望他们。 有一天，姆姆在伦敦的街头遇见一个流浪少年，姆姆对他说：“你不应该在这里，你应该和父母在一起。”少年却反问道：“应该回家吗？可我母亲不喜欢我，我不是没有回去过，但每次都被她赶了出来。姆姆吃惊地问为什么，少年回答说，因为他留了一头长发。 当姆姆和修女们办完事回去的时候，看见少年还在那里，而且神志有些不清了，大概是吃了什么过量的药物所致。于是她们把他送进了医院。 从医院出来时，有个想法突然在姆姆的脑子里火花似的闪了一下，她想：也许这个少年的母亲此时此刻正在为印度的穷人募捐呢，但她的孩子却在这里流浪，无人照管。而且姆姆强烈地意识到，这样的善心人士绝对不会只有一个。有些人非常热情地为远方的饥民和难民奉献，却对自己的孩子或父母不闻不问，既腾不出时间，更腾不出爱。 姆姆更痛心地想：我们如何爱穷人，如果我们不能首先爱自己的孩子？爱如果不是从家庭开始，我们如何保证它结出的果子一定是美善的?使徒若望也说过：“你怎么可以说你爱那个看不见的上主？如果你不爱自己看得见的兄弟。你是个说谎者，如果你说你爱上主，却不爱自己的兄弟。” 不久姆姆更是发现，每当她在西方世界出现时，尤其是当她讲到加尔各答、孟买以及坦桑尼亚的贫苦时，人们便好奇地问个不停。这使她感到情况不妙，她看见他们正在忽略甚至遗忘身边的人。因此，1977年，在英国剑桥大学发表演讲时，姆姆说道：“今天的世界一片混乱，人也饱受痛苦。在我看来，这是由于人们未能在家庭生活中找到爱的结果。人活着，除了需要口粮外，也渴求人的爱、仁慈和体恤。 今天，就是因为缺乏相爱、仁慈和体恤的心，人们的内心极度痛苦。耶稣一再教导我们：“你们要彼此相爱，就像我爱你们一样。” 祂为爱我们，甘愿受苦，死在十字架上。所以，我们若要彼此相爱，并在我们的生命中活出基督的爱，我们就必须从家庭开始。 " 姆姆接着讲道：“今天我不能给你们什么，也没有什么可以付出，我只要求你们一件事，看看你们身边，如果在你的家里看见贫苦的人，那么，就从家庭开始爱，付出微笑，付出时间给身旁的人，直到感觉痛苦——真正的相爱，是一定要付出代价的。” 姆姆进而问道：“我们真的认识身边的人吗？我们认识他们吗？我们知道他们需要我们的爱吗？我们知道吗？如果我们真的认识他们，我们就会看见，在我们身边，有很多人正被孤独和寂寞所困，他们被我们忽略、遗忘，以至摒弃，正在成为生活中新一类的穷人。而他们可能就在我们家里，在我们身旁。我想，这些都是你和我必须知道的。” 接着姆姆坚决地说：“感觉自己没人要，是人类所经历到的最糟糕的一种疾病。我们必须将家庭变成无尽怜悯与爱的泉源。” 最后，她更明确地告诉大家：“每个人都需要爱。每个人都必须知道有人愿意与他为伴，知道他在上主眼中是重要的，不要去远方寻找上主，他不在那里，他就在你的身边。” 而在物质贫穷的加尔各答，姆姆却看见了她所呼唤的那种爱。姆姆说：“能够彼此真正相爱的人，是世界上最幸福的人，而我在最贫困的人身上看到这份爱。他们爱自已的子女，爱自己的家庭，他们虽然贫乏，甚至一无所有，但他们却是快乐的。” 有一天，姆姆看到一个六七岁的小女孩，独自在街上拣破烂，就把她带了回来。姆姆给她洗澡，为她换上干净的衣服，又拿出儿童之家里最好的食物给她吃。但到了晚上，那孩子却偷偷地跑掉了。姆姆很担心她，就去把她寻了回来。但第二天她又跑掉了，如此再三，姆姆就派了一个修女悄悄地跟踪她，看她究竟往哪里去。结果，修女在一棵树下找到了她。 虽然只是一棵树，但那里就是她的家。因为那树下有她的母亲、姐姐和妹妹。她们在那里做饭，她们在那里吃饭；她们在那睡眠，她们在那里醒来；她们在那里哭，在那里笑。因为那里就是她们的家。 至此，姆姆才明白了这个小女孩要反复逃跑的原因，因为她的母亲爱她，而她也爱她的母亲，虽然是一个贫穷的蓬头垢面的母亲，但在她的眼里，却是最美的母亲，而母亲就是她的家。 因此，在姆姆看来，家庭应该成为爱的泉源－－爱是一切美德的灵魂，除非这个泉眼里涌流着源源不绝的活水，否则我们无法保证我们的善心总不干涸。 我曾在《自洁的洗濯》那本书里写道：你若要爱人，首先要爱你，的家人。同样，你若要爱神，也要首先爱你的家人。通过爱你的家人来爱神。然后，通过爱你的邻人来爱神。家是你爱人的起点，也是你爱神的起点。涟漪就是这样扩展的，那更大的波浪也是这样开始的。但是，如何使你的家成为爱的泉源呢？在第一届世界家庭会议上，姆姆说道：“一个祈祷的家庭，是一个幸福的家庭。如果你的家庭能够成为祈祷之家，那么，你的家庭便能够成为爱之家。如果你们能够一同祷告，那么你们便能够彼此相爱。“因为祈祷的果实是信仰，信仰的果实是爱，爱的果实是服务，服务的果实就是和平。 事实上，姆姆的这段讲话对于我们当下的生活是很有针对性的。我们现在所处的这个世界，尤其是城市世界，充满着太多的噪音和混乱，人们试图通过电视、网络或其他的方式甚至自我放纵来获得满足，结果越来越浮躁，也越来越饥渴和虚空，很多人日以继夜地忙碌，匆匆忙忙地奔走。害怕停顿，更害怕静默。即便是短暂的静默，也会让他们感觉恐慌，甚至无所适从。 但有一个美好的方法可以帮助我们沉静，继而获得满足，那就是姆姆一再强调的祈祷。而共同的祈祷，又能使我们在沉静中不至于感觉孤单。 最关键的是，上主就是一位沉默的朋友，只有当我们的内心安静到足以倾听的时候，祂才会来临。祈祷不仅促使我们忏悔和思索，更使心灵获得饱足、安慰和喜悦。而喜悦本身又是一种美好的祈祷。它就像一颗具有多种可能性的种子，除了可以生出更多的喜悦，还可以生出热爱、温馨、平安，以及慷慨的施予和真诚的接纳。 德兰姆姆是一个修女，在她18岁之后的漫长人生里。一直过着团体生活，但家庭在她心中却有一个极其特别的位置。在她和修女们看来，她们虽然没有世俗的婚姻生活，但并不表明她们没有结婚。德兰姆姆同一位美国教授的巧问妙答，曾被人们干百次地传诵。这位教授认为，如果德兰修女结了婚，就不会这样要求人们用笑容彼此相待了。结果姆姆回答道：“错了，我已经结了婚，而且有时候也觉得很难向耶稣微笑，因为祂也会十分苛刻，”因此，耶稣既是她们的主，也是她们的净配，是她们惟一的爱，是她们的生命，是她们一切的一切，是她们的所有。 如果从这个角度来看，也许我们就不难理解，为什么德兰姆姆要反复强调爱必须从家庭开始了。因为姆姆的爱，就是从家庭开始的。然后发散开去，成为一道温暖圣洁的仁爱之光，照亮世界上所有的穷人，也照亮我们日渐冷漠的心灵。