Chapter 29 Chapter 2 How I Started Living

My brother had great hopes for me.He has a great desire for fame and fortune.He was a magnanimous, magnanimous man, and of a simple disposition, and therefore had a wide circle of acquaintances, from which he hoped to win me some customers.He thought my business would soon be prosperous, so he allowed the family expenses to grow heavier and heavier.In order to prepare a field for me to open, he did not take pains to manage it in every possible way.The uproar caused by my caste because I went abroad is still making waves after I return home.The caste was divided into two factions, one faction immediately restored my caste identity; the other faction still insisted on expelling me from the caste.My brother, in order to please the former faction, took me to take a bath in the holy river of Nashik before I returned to Rajkot, and once back to Rajkot, another caste feast was arranged.I don't think so of these practices.But because my elder brother's love for me is boundless, and my respect for him is no less than his great love, I will mechanically act according to his wishes, and regard his will as a golden rule.In this way, the turmoil of my restoration of caste status will be over.I have never wanted to ask the part of the people who refused to restore my caste status to grant my request, and I have no complaints against the leaders of that part.Some of them didn't like me, but I tried my best not to hurt their dignity.I have great respect for the custom of expelling caste status.According to these rules, all my relatives, including my parents-in-law, even my sister and brother-in-law, are not allowed to entertain me, not even to drink a glass of water in their house.They all intend to quietly break this prohibition, but this is completely different from my temper of not wanting to do things behind people's backs.

Because of my prudence, I have never felt troubled by my caste; in fact, even that part of the people who regard me as a different caste has treated me very kindly.They even help me in affairs and don't expect me to do anything for caste.I believe that these happy things come from my non-resistance.If I clamored to restore caste status, if I divided the caste into more factions, if I offended the caste chiefs, they would definitely retaliate, so I would not come back from England as I am now, but Throw yourself into a vortex of a struggle or into a faction that's heading for hypocrisy.

My relationship with my wife is still not very satisfactory.Although I have seen the world in England, my jealousy has not been cured.I am nervous and superstitious about every little thing, so that all my good wishes are unfulfilled.I intended to help her in her studies so that she could read and write, but my passions kept getting in the way, and she had to suffer from my own shortcomings.Once I even asked her to go back to her mother's house and wait until she was very sad before picking her up.I realized later that it was all due to my boredom. I had planned to carry out some reforms in the education of children.I have some nephews, my son who stayed at home when I went to England is almost four now.I wish to teach these children sports, to strengthen their bodies, and to make them better by my own instruction.In this regard, I have the support of my brother, and my efforts have achieved some results.I was very much in the company of the children, playing and telling jokes with them that I still do to this day.Since then I have always thought that I should be a good teacher of children.

On the issue of diet, there is clearly a need for "reform".Tea and coffee already have their place in our homes. My brother thought I should keep a little of the English style when I came back, and so china and the like, which used to be reserved for special occasions, became common household items.My "reform" was the icing on the cake.I advocate eating oatmeal, from cocoa instead of tea and coffee, actually adding cocoa to tea and coffee.Leather boots and leather shoes have long been available, but I added suits to make the Europeanization more thorough. The overhead thus increases.Fresh stuff is added every day.We have tied a white elephant to the gate at last, but what shall we feed it?Tickets, practicing law in Rajkot, must be a joke.I don't even have the knowledge of a qualified lawyer, yet I expect to earn ten times that!No such stupid litigator will come to me.Even with such people, can I add arrogance and deceit to ignorance, so as to increase my debt to the world?

My friends advised me to go to Bombay and live for a while, in order to gain some experience in the High Court, to study Indian law, and to draw as much as I could. I took this advice and went to Bombay.I started a house in Bombay, employing a cook as incompetent as myself.He is a Brahmin, and I treat him not as a servant, but as a family.He sometimes washed his body with water, but he never washed his body seriously. The "floor mopping" he wore was dirty, and the holy silk he wore was also dirty. He also knew nothing about Hindu scriptures.But how can I find a better cook? "So, Lovi Shankar (that's his name)," I sometimes asked him, "it's understandable that you don't know how to cook, but you should know the daily prayers, right?"

"Prayer, sir! The plow is our prayer, and the shovel is our daily ritual. I am such a Brahmin. I live on your charity, otherwise I would have to plow the fields." So I had to be a teacher of Lovi Shangka.I have plenty of time.I set out to cook a meal myself and use the experience of British vegetarian cooking.I bought a stove and started running around the kitchen with Lovi Shankar.I myself have no taboo not to eat with people of different castes, and I am not bound by such stereotypes, so we can live together without restraint.The only obstacle among us is that Luo Weishanka has been unable to change his dirty habits, and his diet can't be cleaned up!

However, with no income to support the ever-increasing expenses, I could only live in Mumbai for four or five months at most. That's how I started life.I found that being a lawyer was a chore—a job in name but not reality.I feel that my responsibility is too great.