Chapter 30 Toshiro Diary (28)

May 3rd. Ten p.m.We were ordered to return to the squadron and head towards Xinzhuang Village.It was a dimly lit night, and there was a quiet wind blowing in the wheat field. Compared with the fierce gunfire during the day, how peaceful this moment was!It seems that everything has fallen into a deep sleep. In this quiet world, it is unimaginable that there will be murderous people waiting for the opportunity to play with murderers. Stillness and movement, isn't this just a dreamlike change?It is unimaginable that this peace and silence is actually a battlefield for bloodthirsty demons to jump beams.The warm wind gently blows the ears of wheat, and until two hours ago, the sound of earth-shattering shells was still ringing non-stop.Like the last breath of a man who returns to the light, fades away and returns suddenly to silence, like a dream, like a lie, but, oh, oh, never thought of the peace and silence of the night of the third of May, It should be a night of regret and regret that I will never forget!

We were walking on a somewhat low-lying, almost dry riverbed.There is a road along the hollow.Where the concave land turns right, the road extends towards Xinzhuang Village. We arrived at Xinzhuang quietly and quickly.Xinzhuang is located about 1,500 meters away from the brigade headquarters.There are also towering trees in the village. Almost the whole squadron was at the front of the village, and our detachment became a reserve, staying in a deep natural trench.The ditch is a dry ditch.It is said that during the day the squadron wiped out the enemy soldiers who were going to retake Xinzhuang, and captured two enemy machine guns.The soldiers told me that they defeated the enemy just like the Fifth Squadron was beaten back then, and avenged the Fifth Squadron.

I left the team members behind and followed the squadron leader to scout the position. Almost all the people in the squadron were located in front of the village.Behind the village, there was only one detachment where I had been ordered to guard.When the squadron leader and I checked the sentry, the enemy bombs flew over the village "whoosh-whoosh--" and landed in the dark wheat field.We lay down and discussed the security deployment. "Dong, the enemy is in front of the village. This is the back of the village, the enemy is unlikely to come!" The squadron leader whispered.He went on to say: "This road is the road you came from just now, leading to the headquarters of the brigade. Sentry fortifications must be built on the right, front, and left sides of the road! Be vigilant in three directions!"

"Yes! I see!" Ten minutes later, I explained the security area to the team members. "The enemy is in front of the village, here is the rear. Seventy meters to the right, a detachment sent by the small team is on guard, and sixty to seventy meters to the left, the Xinchuan detachment sent by the second team is there. We must The middle ground, where we are, is being guarded." "This is the road we came from just now, leading to the headquarters of the brigade. The squadron leader ordered us to take this road as the center and guard the right, front and left sides."

"The vast rear of such a large village is guarded by such a small number of people? I feel that this place is very scary..." Noguchi muttered.He is a worker at the Kawasaki Shipyard. He has a bad stomach because of gluttony.He is a reserve soldier. Whenever someone had to stay in the rear, he was often the first to stay, with little desire to go to the front.Even if they went to the front line, they would only do some work to monitor the coolies.His backpack was always stuffed with trophies, snacks and cigarettes.During the Battle of Nanjing, he hurt his stomach because he ate too much rice cakes and red bean porridge, so he was left behind, but he didn't seem to think it was disgraceful at all.

He is a little clever, especially in terms of machinery. Once he wants to dig a trench that involves his own safety, he will dig it seriously and beautifully, which is admirable. He said "very scary", in fact, everyone is like this.Battles that cost a great deal of sacrifice are repeated every day.In this battle of Taierzhuang, the enemy's large army was larger than ours, and they kept attacking day and night. It was really a particularly nervous and restless battle. "Noguchi and Takiguchi are guarding the right side of the road!" I said, indicating the location of the roadside.

Noguchi and Takiguchi put down their backpacks. I ordered: "Take out the round shovel and dig the trench!" After graduating from Sonobe Middle School, Takiguchi entered Tohoku University in Sendai from Kanazawa Fourth High School. He is an intellectual.He was a college student who enlisted as an active duty soldier after his military service grace period expired.He is twenty-seven years old, a thin man who walks with short steps.In my opinion, he is not a very brave man.I have a good relationship with him, and considering that he is still in college, I don't want to ruin him even if it happens, so I try to arrange him in a safe position.This time, put him in the last position.But the marvelous and ironic thing about fate finally came to me clearly two hours later, in the form of the most memorable and saddest lamentation, before my eyes.Is fate something that people have to bear immediately after they are born?What exactly is fate?Is it "Daguan"?No matter what happens, "it is fate", people use this sentence to seek "philosophy".Everyone on the battlefield has become a fatalist.On the battlefield, sometimes what could have been avoided turned out to be unavoidable, and sometimes the opposite happened.The possible becomes impossible, and the impossible becomes possible.In this unpredictable mystery, we all feel the existence of fate inexplicably.

I ordered Kumano and Shimosaka to serve as guard on the left, and myself, Tanaka, and Takehashi to be in front to serve as guard in the front.It was the enemy position that Noguchi first discovered.The land in the area of ​​"Yangyi" is soft sandy soil in case of depression. We arrived here after nightfall, so we couldn't know the exact terrain. The night was dark, and an eerie silence enveloped us like death. Our nerves are strained by the endless attacks of the enemy over the past few days. As we went on and on, we carefully pricked up our ears to the breeze over the wheat fields, the footsteps of the dogs, the barking of the dogs, and every other sound.

The three of us at the front dug a trench big enough for us to stand.The others hadn't finished digging yet, so the three of us each stood guard for ten minutes. Let Tanaka stand guard in the trench first, while Zhuqiao and I hunched over and smoked in the trench.We had to smoke secretly, keeping the flame of the cigarettes in our hands so that it wouldn't leak out.This smoke is really fragrant. In the darkness and silence, the sound of digging trenches was faintly heard. Suddenly, intense gunshots and noises sounded in the dark distance.It seems that the brigade headquarters was attacked at night.

Tracer bullets arced in the night, bullets shattered the silence, and noises and shouts echoed everywhere. But after about 20 minutes, he returned to the original silent dark world again. I don't know if it's because the place where Noguchi and Kumano dug the fortification is so hard that they can't finish it.I took out the compressed biscuits and chewed them "crackling". "Who is that?" Noguchi's voice came suddenly.Startled, I looked up.Noguchi shouted again: "Who is that? Who is that?" I asked, "Noguchi, what's going on?" "There is someone under the big tree in front of the road!" Noguchi replied and asked, "Who is it? Who is it?" There was no reply. "Shoot!" I ordered Noguchi.

Noguchi "pang pong pong" fired three shots in a row. "Stop shooting!" I yelled, scouting the situation. We concentrate, mobilizing our ears and eyes to focus on the front. There was no sound at all.There was a piece of weeds in front of my position, and I couldn't see the front, so I climbed out. I am the team leader, and I must find out whether the suspect is an enemy soldier or something else, and I must deal with it properly. I stooped slightly and moved forward quietly, holding a bayonet-mounted gun tightly in my hand, ready to assassinate the enemy at any time. There is a depression next to the weeds on the left side of the road, so I use the depression to move forward quietly. There are jujube trees and some dead wood at about 25 meters.The suspicious ones are there. There were no weeds there, and I could see clearly, so I leaned against a fallen tree, set up my gun, lay down on the ground, and searched hard in the dark.Still no enemy. So I leaned over to the road to check.About five meters ahead of the road, there was a black shadow squatting on the edge of the wheat field on the right.I couldn't tell if it was a person or a big rock, or something else, just staring.At this time, Takiguchi asked in a low voice: "Old Dong, where are you? Where are you?" He came to my left. "It's Takiguchi, hey, do you see that black figure on the opposite side is not an enemy soldier?" "Where?...Where?" Takiguchi asked nonchalantly.I leaned forward and pulled him close to me. "Well, it looks like an enemy," Takiguchi whispered. "Takiguchi, you didn't bring a gun. I'm here to question you. If you are the enemy, you should back away quickly! Do you hear me?" I whispered to him, and shouted, "Who? Who?" There was no response. . "Who is there?" I yelled again, and the black shadow moved violently and said something.What he said was exactly the same as what we encountered and heard familiarly during the night raid in Bakumeng (place name, here is the transliteration.) in northern China.I immediately realized that this was the enemy, "Takiguchi retreat!" I shouted the order and fired at the shadow. Takiguchi quickly dodges and retreats. one shot.two shots.The shadow disappeared into the wheat field.I have an intuition that there must be a large army behind this enemy, and this person is a scout or something. I felt that it was very dangerous, and I should go back to the position to resist, so I ran across the long depression beside the weeds, and shouted: "There are enemies! Shoot to the front of the road!" I shouted repeatedly while running.When I rushed to my position, Tanaka stood up in a panic, preparing to rush out of the trench. "Ahead of the road! Shoot!" I yelled at Tanaka as I kept firing from my position into the dark ahead.Tanaka hurriedly fired at nowhere. "The road ahead is this way!" I shouted to Tanaka again.In order to indicate the direction of shooting, I fired again and again.Tanaka was completely panicked.I was shooting fiercely near the jujube tree, when Noguchi's voice suddenly came from behind: "Where's Takiguchi? Where's Takiguchi?" I felt very strange, thinking that Takiguchi should have returned to the position before me. What's going on? ?Then he asked Noguchi who was looking for it: "What's going on?" The answer was that Takiguchi was not there. what!What about Takiguchi?what happened?I shouted in surprise, "Takiguchi! Takiguchi!" There was no response.I searched the road and found a dark figure lying on the road behind our position.I ran over in surprise and took a look: ah!It's Takiguchi! "Takiguchi! Takiguchi!" I yelled desperately, holding onto him tightly.I stared fixedly at Takiguchi's face.Takiguchi leaned weakly against my arm, groaning in agony before dying.In the darkness, black blood could also be seen flowing from his head and flowing on the ground.Grief pricks my heart. "How did this happen! How did this happen! Takiguchi! Takiguchi!" I cried and hugged him tightly. At this moment, I intuitively felt that it was a shot fired by Tanaka in panic... I gently put down Takiguchi, ran to Tanaka's side, grabbed his arms suddenly, and shot him with all my strength without saying a word. He slapped.Tanaka trembled, and argued: "You blame me, but how can you figure it out!" He meant that the ghost knows who fired the bullet.I didn't say "Your bullet killed him", the hand I slapped said it. I asked myself, what's the use of asking Tanaka to find out the truth now?So she went back to Takiguchi again, hugged him tightly and cried and cried, what a tragedy! I forgot myself, I forgot my enemies, I forgot everything, and I just howled and wailed over this grief, sorrow, misery, and kept shouting, "Takiguchi! Takiguchi!" Takiguchi was in my arms Moaning in pain, he struggled to hold his last breath for twenty-seven years. what!Dear Takiguchi!And his death was haunted by demons. "Huh-hum--" A heavy and extremely painful hell groan came out of his mouth, and purple-black blood flowed stickily.All my body and mind were taken away by intense grief, and I hugged him as if I had a fever, calling his name. Just at Takiguchi who was still full of energy just now! His hand holding the pen—the hand holding the gun trembled slightly.what!It's all over! Hot tears and inseparable feelings welled up in my heart. "Water! Water!" Hearing Kumano's voice, I suddenly remembered—that's right!He hurried to get the water bottle and dripped water into Takiguchi's groaning mouth.However, the water just overflowed ineffectively.It made me sadder and sadder. Seeing me immersed in lamentation and crying, Kumano greeted me and said, "It doesn't help if you are so sad. You have to report to the squadron leader and the medical guard." He persuaded me.Yes!I changed my mind and said, "Kumano-kun, run to the headquarters!" Kumano ran away, and soon the squadron leader and Sergeant Araki ran over. "Takiguchi, hold on!" The squadron leader ran up to me.The health guards are here. "Squadron leader, he's already dying." The health soldier said straightly. "It can't be done..." Yes, it can't be done anymore.Takiguchi was hit in the head! The words "I can't do it" came to my mind and spread. "Dong!" The squadron leader's calm voice shook my eardrums. "Have!" "How's the situation?" "Yes!" I gave a detailed report on the situation until Takiguchi was hit, but I mixed the biggest lie in this report, intending to hide the most important content and muddle through. "It can't be done", this sentence broke my heart again, I burst into tears, and my sense of responsibility whipped me violently. "If the enemy was in the front, then Takiguchi was shot on the way back, and the bullet should have shot forward from behind, but in fact it passed from the side. So where did the bullet come from?" I heard The squadron leader's accusing voice made me extremely depressed.If I tell the truth here now, what will happen to Tanaka? Everything is the responsibility of my team leader.I desperately said: "Bullets... When you came to check with the squadron leader, bullets flew from there. Similarly, after that, there were also bullets, so I think it was hit by that bullet." This lie, I am exhausted, "Squadron leader, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Everything is my fault, I'm sorry!" After I finished telling the lie, I burst into tears. "Medical soldier, bring Takiguchi to the squadron headquarters immediately!" The squadron leader ordered and fell silent.The painful silence continued.Mr. Morisaki Cho is here. "You said you didn't know that Takiguchi was shot?" The squadron leader's voice beat my heart mercilessly. "Yes! As soon as I spotted the enemy, I immediately told Takiguchi to retreat, and I retreated while shooting, so I thought that Takiguchi who retreated first must have returned to his position." "Then how do you know that Takiguchi was shot?" "Noguchima in the rear position: Where is Takiguchi? Takiguchi is not here, I feel strange, I think it's strange, I let him come back first, looking around, I found Takiguchi moaning on the road." "Where is Takiguchi's position?" "Over there. The same camp as Noguchi, the last one." "What order did you give?" The squadron leader's stern questioning mercilessly whipped my heart full of frustration and self-blame. "Shoot the road ahead!" "Did you shoot after you got into position?" "Yes, six shots were fired." "Did you shoot at the position of the enemy you found?" "That's it. Towards the jujube tree over there." "Shoot up the road, is that the right order? Think about it!" "yes!" The squadron leader seemed to feel that Takiguchi's death was an abnormal death.After looking at Takiguchi's wound, Morisaki Caozhang shouted: "The wound is huge, and the bullets are very close!" Ah, I can't hide it anymore.I feel endless blame. "Oh, I was shot in the foot too!" Cao Chang's loud voice shocked me, as if he was beating me hard.foot? ...I can't help but look back.It was unexpected.Whose gun hit it?I was completely overwhelmed by a feeling of helplessness. Was it wrong to order to shoot down the road?I felt such a deep sense of guilt that I even wanted to die in apology.How to meet the squadron leader, how to meet Takiguchi's parents!Infinite laments and self-blame tormented me. Takiguchi!I was a stupid squad leader, so the command was wrong, which led to your death.How can I apologize to you?Sorry!Sorry!I repent in my heart. "Dong!" The squadron leader suddenly called my name. "Send a sentry to the jujube tree in front of the weeds. There are weeds blocking the view, it is very dangerous... Six people are not enough. Okay, let's add a Czech machine gun captured during the day... oh , and, Dong, Takiguchi...what is it called Takiguchi?" "Mitsuo Takiguchi." "What!" said the squadron leader in surprise. "It's Mitsuo Takiguchi?...Is that so! I thought it was—" The squadron leader lowered his voice, looking very surprised, and lowered his tone as if he had something to say. "I... thought it was—" he then whispered to himself again. "Tou! It's such a pity that he was beaten to death!" He sighed deeply, "To be honest, although I can't tell people, I don't want Mitsuo Takiguchi to let him die. I think, It would be better...of course it doesn't mean anyone can do it, but...when Guangfu left the alliance, the captain of the alliance was asking whether he should take this kid with him, because this kid is still a college student! But Guangfu said let me go to the expedition Well, that's why I brought it here... His parents have entrusted him again and again... Finally he died..." The squadron leader said to me regretfully. "I'm really sorry, I'm sorry!" "Oh, no way." The squadron leader said. "Strengthen vigilance!" The squadron leader added this sentence and left. After listening to the squadron leader's words, my heart full of sorrow was more deeply immersed in tears.I ordered Tanaka to stand guard under the jujube tree. "Bamboo Bridge, please dig a trench for sentries." The two left the trench and walked away.I was alone in the trenches, brooding.Is my command to "shoot the road ahead" inappropriate?For the person on the left side of the road, the right side of the road and the extension of the road are all "the front of the road". For the people in the A position and the B position, both A and B are in front of the road. Therefore, Noguchi, who is located at the B position, faces the direction of A Tanaka, who was in position A, fired in the direction of B. If this order is inappropriate, then it should be What should I order?At night, the terrain is unfamiliar, and no one knows what will be there, whether there are jujube trees, not to mention that this is a highly tense night.Should I say: "enemy in the road"?But that doesn't work, because it will mistake our own people who have withdrawn from the road as enemies.But the phrase "the enemy far away from the road" is also quite different.All in all, the soldiers on the battlefield, especially Tanaka and Noguchi, already knew that Takiguchi and I had left the battlefield, shouldn't they make a careful judgment?Shouldn't Noguchi shoot after confirming that it's not Takiguchi?Shouldn't Tanaka judge where the road ahead points? I can't think of a very precise call to action in this case.Takehashi-kun said that Takiguchi was knocked down at the same time that Tanaka-kun shot.Shimosaka said it was not clear whether it was Tanaka or Noguchi who shot, because Noguchi also shot.So maybe Noguchi suddenly remembered and asked himself, "Where's Takiguchi? Where's Takiguchi?" I didn't know about Noguchi's shooting until Shimosaka told me.Takiguchi was hit about three meters away from his position, Noguchi's position.Noguchi must have hit the foot, and Tanaka the head. But all the crimes will be borne by me!I'm the squad leader.Am I overly nervous and panicking?Isn't there a more appropriate way to deal with it? The sound of trenches being dug from the side of the jujube tree came indistinctly.I crouched down at the bottom of the trench and lightly lit a cigarette.He looked at his watch by the light of the cigarette.The time is 1:10 am, 1:10 am on May 4th.Unforgettable May 4th at 1:10 am. Should I quietly withdraw to the position after discovering the enemy, report the situation to the team members, and then indicate the direction of shooting, and carry out practical and accurate combat? However, we are tasked with being scouts and outposts.The enemy is right in front of you, how can there be such ample time!When the frontline soldiers learn of the enemy's attack, they should shout from their position: "Attention! One hundred meters!" while running back. This is how I was educated during active service. This time I yelled: "There are enemies! Shoot to the front of the road!" while retreating. When I found an enemy, I also had a premonition that there was a large army of enemies lurking behind him.Because even if he is just a scout, he will not be alone; if it is a surprise attack, he will not be alone, and I also suspect that it may be the enemy who attacked the headquarters of the brigade in the middle of the night last night. The enemy twenty-five meters in front of our position cannot be treated calmly.If the enemy is determined to rush over, the distance of twenty-five meters will only take a few seconds. Moreover, there is always a wariness about grenades lurking in each of our minds. So far we have always had to worry about dealing with the enemy's grenades.Enemies have a large number of grenades and use them frequently. At that moment just now, the "grenade" also existed in my mind. Throw in a few grenades, and it's all over. Still can't imagine having enough time. We were under fire day and night, confronted with a defiant enemy - confronted with a defiant enemy only a thousand meters away.In my mind, which tenses every nerve, I have to listen to the whisper of the breeze, I have to watch the bark of the dog, and I have to be extremely tense and alert to any sound, any sign, or any slight change. Note, the whole body of five feet and five inches has turned into a nerve - this is me, after spotting an approaching enemy in the dark, I want to retreat quietly, and then report to my comrades, this can be done ? Am I taking the right steps? Is it only the pointing method to shoot the target that is wrong? After that, the enemy soldiers fell silent and did not come to attack.Could it be that the enemy is really just one person? If so, my instincts are wrong.Am I too timid? But if, as I expected, there was an ambush and we were attacked after that, I would be quite right. Either the enemy was an army, but he gave up attacking and retreated because he thought we had a large number of people; or he was really only one person, and did not attack after that. Whether the measures I have taken are right or wrong will depend on my judgment as to whether the enemy is an army or a person. I think about it, think about it carefully The bamboo bridge that "creaked" dug the trench is back. "Old Dong!" "What's up?" "Maybe something big will happen, Tanaka-kun..." "Tanaka-kun?..." "Maybe suicide." "What!" I was shocked. "Tanaka-kun trembled all over, and said to himself: Suicide, but now is not the time. Now is the time when troops are needed, even if there is one more person. Or just forget it now? What should I do? Anyway He was shaking all the time, berating himself." Sure enough!I was heartbroken and deeply afraid of karma. Now if Tanaka commits suicide, then I will really have no face to see the squadron leader.I also have to follow them and go to apologize. Considering that Tanaka could not be left there alone, I ordered Shimosaka to change the whistle. While I was explaining the reason to Shimosaka and Kumano, a gunshot rang out in front of me. "Did it really work?" I was taken aback and my heart palpited. "Shimosaka, come on! Come on!" I urged. Finally, Tanaka, who staggered like a demon possessed and immersed in severe self-blame, returned to me who was heartbroken.Seeing him alive and well despite his stagger, a soft relief surged in my heart. "Takehashi-kun, treat yourself as a snack!" I handed Tanaka over to Takehashi, and then went to check. Pass through the short weeds and come under the jujube tree.Shimosaka stood there.In front of my eyes, the darkness spreads endlessly, only a path of self-confession is vaguely discernible.This place is twenty-five meters away from the position, which seems a little too far away. "Shimosaka, how do you feel?" I asked softly. "It feels a little dangerous," "Really? Move the sentry point down a bit! I think it's too dangerous to set up a sentry here." I took Shimosaka back about ten meters, halfway on the weed road. "Shimosaka, come and dig a kneeling and shooting trench, and serve as a guard in this trench! I'll cut down the weeds so we can keep an eye out. " The first class soldier in Shimosaka hurriedly dug trenches.I went to Noguchi to borrow a Navy knife.That was the position where Takiguchi had been about an hour and a half ago, and it was now guarded by Private Iyakura from the 1st Division armed with captured Czech machine guns.When Noguchi was fumbling for the knife in his backpack, Shimosaka's interrogation suddenly came: "Who? Who? Who!" here we go again?I opened my eyes wide.Then, two shots pierced the darkness. Shimosaka is located in front of the position.I thought I couldn't repeat Takiguchi's mistakes, so I immediately ordered: "Shimosaka, retreat quickly!" Shimosaka ran quickly and withdrew. "How about it?" "Don't be careless. The enemy is entangled endlessly. When I was digging the trench, the soil from the round shovel got on the gun. I wanted to dust off the soil on the gun. When I suddenly looked up, I found a guy who was touching me and walked away from me. It's only about two feet away. If I know a little later, I might let him kill me! It's really chilling!" "What happened to the enemy soldier after you shot?" "Hide across the road, here! It's in the wheat field over there. It must still be there." It has been more than an hour and a half since the Takiguchi incident. We opened fire and made a fuss for a while, but the enemy did not seem to retreat, and was still stubbornly approaching.If there was only one enemy, he wouldn't have taken such a bold move!It's troops!It must be a single enemy soldier with a military background staring at Shimosaka at a distance of ten meters. The enemy soldier spent more than an hour slowly approaching us. The situation is serious.it is good! ? "Target! Rye field ahead! Shoot!" I commanded the Jaycan machine gunner with a Czech machine gun. Machine guns fired like a gust of fire at the wheat fields immersed in deathly silence.When I looked carefully, I found that the bullets hit the road two or three meters away, and then ricocheted into the wheat field. "Impact too close! Adjust distance!" The machine gunner immediately raised the muzzle and corrected the bullet point.The Czech light machine gun swept across the wheat field. "Stop shooting!" The original deathly silence returned. "What do you think? I think the enemy ahead is very stubborn. It seems to be a fairly large force. It is difficult for the seven of us to defend. So I want to ask for reinforcements..." I asked the team members for their opinions. "I think so too. Seven people can't completely defend the rear of this big village. Maybe the enemy will attack soon. Ask for reinforcements!" Shimosaka replied. "Is that how you see it? I feel that the situation is very urgent. Hey! Kumano-kun! Go and report the situation to the squadron leader and ask for reinforcements!" I ordered that to Kumano, but Kumano didn't want to move. "Is there anyone else who can go?" No one wants to go.From here to the squadron headquarters in front of the village, you have to pass through a dark and silent road.Moreover, the towering tree must pass under the tree.Without a friendly army, it was indeed a terrible journey.At this time, even if a person stays in a very dangerous place, as long as he has company, he will not want to leave there.Now that we have been exposed to the enemy and constantly threatened, the way to the squadron headquarters may be somewhat dangerous, but it is much safer than here, but the team members may feel that it is more dangerous to act alone, so no one is willing to undertake this task . "Then let me go. Shimosaka! You will act as the team leader. If you encounter an enemy attack, don't stay here and retreat while fighting! Everyone throw away your backpacks and everything else! So everyone, put your backpacks first. Bury it at the bottom of the trench, and come back to get it after the enemy has been beaten back! Did you hear me?It's all up to you!I'm gone, there are only six people left! " After I finished speaking, I ran to the squadron headquarters.Drilled through the dark bushes, passed the earth wall, crossed the square, there was no danger on the road, and arrived at the headquarters safely.The squadron leader fell asleep in a house that was about to collapse.I state all the circumstances and call for reinforcements. "Murashita is here, go and tell him to take the Zhujian unit!" The squadron leader said to me in the darkness. "Yes!" I saluted in the dark, and turned back out the door.A sentry stood outside the door. "Hey! Where is Captain Murashita?" "In that house. Did something happen? Takiguchi died about two hours later." The sentry pointed me to the room where the squad leader stayed and told me about Takiguchi's death. "That's right, Takiguchi is dead! But he still lived for two hours!" I prayed in my heart, holding the gun tightly in my right hand, and walked towards the captain's house. Sentinels stood there, too. "Is the captain there?" "He's falling asleep in fear, under the bed." "In bed?" "Under the bed! At the beginning, he said that we had to be on the bed to fall asleep, and let us find a bed, move in, and fall asleep warmly, but after hearing that Takiguchi was hit, he quickly crawled under the bed" Slept. The soldiers were sleeping on the ground, and they all said they wanted that bed, and thought it was a pity." "Perhaps the bed is easy to be shot?" "Maybe." I sneered and entered the room. "Squad leader, please lend me the bamboo unit! I told the squadron leader as well." I finished speaking to the squad leader under the bed and reported the dangerous situation. "That's right! I asked them to go for reinforcements. When Takiguchi was attacked, I wanted to go too, but because I hurt my eyes at the 250 heights, I couldn't see clearly at night, so I didn't go. Send reinforcements immediately !" The captain sat down on the bed, and excused himself for not even going to Takiguchi's deathbed.I sneered at him inwardly. "I'm going back." I went out angrily.Six lonely comrades in arms are waiting for me to go back.I quickened my pace. On the side of the silent village, comrades are guarding with high tension.safe and sound.I am relieved. "I'm off to call for reinforcements. They'll be here soon!" After I conveyed it to everyone, I wanted to scold the squad leader for his nasty appearance.Since Second Lieutenant Murashita was assigned to our third team, he ate and lived with my first team, and was very close to the members of our first team.And he has a good relationship with Takiguchi, and they often talk to each other.But in the end, all the other cadres of the squadron came, but the second lieutenant Murashita, who was the team leader, did not come. The squad leader, who pretended to be deaf and dumb to the death of his own squad, was so afraid of coming here!After hearing the news of Takiguchi's death, I wanted to spit on him for being able to get under the bed.Although I am not used to fighting yet, I should maintain the restraint of the squad leader! The true value of a person is reflected in extraordinary moments. "The captain nestled under the bed and fell asleep in fear." After I finished speaking, I entered the trench where Tanaka and Zhuqiao were located. "Takehashi-kun, are you hungry? Eat compressed biscuits!" After I finished speaking, I took out a bag of compressed biscuits from the backpack at the bottom of the trench.Tanaka to my right was silent. The sound of "Gaba Gaba" chewing compressed biscuits interspersed in the trenches.A slight tremor spread to my right arm.I stared at the ground.The tremors continued. It was Tanaka who was trembling! Was he listening to Takiguchi's groans and curses? Is he trembling with fear of the greatest wrong, and weeping with the bitterness of self-reproach?In this lonely dark trench! I felt that Tanaka was trembling out of self-blame, but I didn't say a word to ease his anxiety or comfort his mood. Instead, I deliberately kept silent, with a bit of hatred in my heart: "Although Tanaka blames himself Well, it can be regarded as praying for Takiguchi's blessing." Five minutes, ten minutes, the time passed bit by bit, and Tanaka's trembling was still coming from his right arm.The unbearable passage of time! As soon as the sun rises over the wheat fields, there will be a stormy battle, and now the night of the earth lies in a cold sleep.I said in my heart again: "Tanaka just blame yourself!" My intentionally bad heart showed no sympathy for his wailing in the abyss of pain.My silent oppression tormented his heart.He lost his sense of superiority, self-confidence and reserve, and fell into embarrassment and self-blame. Tanaka trembled and trembled, like a dead man who couldn't even cry, pain, and sigh, a man who couldn't think, couldn't speak, and trembled numbly with fear, a seriously ill old man. The cold night air crept silently into the trenches.I reached into the zip cookie bag again. The sound of "Gaba Gaba" gnawing biscuits sounded again.My heart seemed to be saved by the sound of crackers being chewed, somewhat brightened. I stooped to light a cigarette, and in an instant, the trenches lit up. Tanaka's shoes and calves were trembling. "Tanaka-kun!" I couldn't help pressing his leg with my right hand, and greeted him quietly. Poor Tanaka.This is a battlefield, accidentally injuring one's own people, wrong shots, and unexpected things are common.Tanaka is not to blame.Poor Tanaka—I thought about it. "Tanaka-kun, don't you want compressed biscuits? Are you hungry? Eat!" "Oh..." His voice faded away weakly. "How about some food?" "Oh..." a weak voice full of sadness. I handed him the cookie bag.His dazed and weak hands trembled to grab the biscuits, but the palms of his hands only kept shaking randomly in the biscuit bag, and he couldn't grab a single biscuit. His hands that lost their grip could only move the biscuits slightly. "Old Dong!" came his timid voice. "What's the matter? Tanaka-kun." Only trembling was felt, and there was no sound other than that.Silence lasted for a few seconds. "Old Dong!" Like a child pleading after being scolded, his timid voice came from the darkness. "Don't worry, Tanaka-kun!" I replied to the voice in the darkness. "Old Dong!" Again, that cowardly, pleading voice echoed in the trenches. I can fully deduce what he wants to say.He wanted to beg: "Please don't say that I killed you, okay?" "Tanaka-kun!" I shouted in an encouraging tone, "There is nothing to worry about. Whether it was your bullet, or whose bullet it was, is unclear.These are commonplace on the battlefield.无论发生什么事，就是嘴烂了我也绝对不会对任何人说的，所以请你放心。中队长什么都不知道。I didn't say anything.相信我，放心吧！ " 听我这么一说，田中一直恐惧颤抖的手在黑暗中紧紧握住了我的手。我的手都快给攥疼了。 "对不起！谢谢！"声音不高，却充满了信赖、感谢和喜悦。 "就什么也别想了，打起精神，吃压缩饼干吧！"我说完，心情不由得欢快起来，有滋有味地抽起了烟。 漫长的夜晚终于逃往西边了。东边宽阔麦田的穗尖上，太阳金光闪闪，大地呼吸着苏醒过来。我们像从噩梦中醒来一般放下心来，向着朝阳张开双臂，振臂深深地呼吸，为这生的喜悦大声打着呵欠。 太阳彻底照亮了大地，连壕底也亮起来了。我们从土里挖出背包，离开了战壕。麦穗尖被露水打湿了，清冷澄净的晨风吹过。 没有枪炮声，完全是个和平宁静的早晨。很难想象这里是杀戮的战场。枣树拖着长长的影子子然挺立着。似乎昨天晚上什么也没发生过。 我回忆起昨晚的事，起身去调查地形。路上，看见朝阳照射下的一摊黑乎乎的血，这是泷口的血。昨晚的惨景再次清晰地浮现在眼前。村下小队长来了。他是因为我请求增援，才无可奈何地从床底下爬出来，把竹间分队带了来的。 "东！敌人在哪里来着？" 我不大高兴，指着前面说了声"在那边树下"，便没再多言。我不想跟他说什么。"这是泷口的血。"我说完这句，便带着队员回总部了。 中队长命令我将拢口火葬，又补充说： "只是火葬时要想办法不能冒烟，因为烟是敌人炮击的目标。" 我被这苛刻的要求难住了。本需很多木材，要烧几个小时的，可不让冒烟，真是件困难的事。不过我还是想尽量做到，便到处物色火葬的场所。 我选定了某户大宅子的里院。宅外围着高高的砖墙。我们在围墙边挖了长方形的壕沟，沟底垫上桌子、衣橱、椅子等家具以及拆房子得来的柱子等等，让泷口穿着军装躺在上面。 我凝视着沈口安息的脸庞，合掌为他祷告。不断涌出的泪水打湿了我的双颊，悲哀涌上来，直堵得我心慌。 战友们在尸体上铺上稻草，又高高地堆了些树枝。 我拿着一束稻草，用来点火的一束稻草。 那么长的时间里，一直"老东氨、"泷口氨这样叫来叫去的战友！ 同甘共苦的战友！ 啊，直到昨天为止，共同跨越了死亡之线的战友！ 无常的人生！ 我被强烈的感情冲击着，放声大哭，一边哭一边点着了稻草。 燃成一片灰烬的泷口啊！ 火红彤彤地燃烧起来。火苗从稻草到木头、从木头到木头移动着，将我最亲爱的战友包围了。 我只是莫名地悲伤。 下午捡起尸骨，装进田中做的盒子里，将另一片尸骨埋在他战死的地方，又削了一段高三尺左右的圆木头，用铅笔写上我完全能推知他想说的话。他是想哀求："请你千万别说出去是我杀的好吗？" "田中君！"我用鼓励的口气用力喊道，"没什么可担心的。 是因你的子弹而死，还是因谁的子弹而死都不清楚。这些都是战场的常事。无论发生什么事，就是嘴烂了我也绝对不会对任何人说的，所以请你放心。中队长什么都不知道。I didn't say anything.相信我，放心吧！ " 听我这么一说，田中一直恐惧颤抖的手在黑暗中紧紧握住了我的手。我的手都快给攥疼了。 "对不起！谢谢！"声音不高，却充满了信赖、感谢和喜悦。 "就什么也别想了，打起精神，吃压缩饼干吧！"我说完，心情不由得欢快起来，有滋有味地抽起了烟。 漫长的夜晚终于逃往西边了。东边宽阔麦田的穗尖上，太阳金光闪闪，大地呼吸着苏醒过来。我们像从噩梦中醒来一般放下心来，向着朝阳张开双臂，振臂深深地呼吸，为这生的喜悦大声打着呵欠。 太阳彻底照亮了大地，连壕底也亮起来了。我们从土里挖出背包，离开了战壕。麦穗尖被露水打湿了，清冷澄净的晨风吹过。 没有枪炮声，完全是个和平宁静的早晨。很难想象这里是杀戮的战常枣树拖着长长的影子子然挺立着。似乎昨天晚上什么也没发生过。 我回忆起昨晚的事，起身去调查地形。路上，看见朝阳照射下的一摊黑乎乎的血。这是泷口的血。昨晚的惨景再次清晰地浮现在眼前。村下小队长来了。他是因为我请求增援，才无可奈何地从床底下爬出来，把竹间分队带了来的。 "东！敌人在哪里来着？" 我不大高兴，指着前面说了声"在那边树下"，便没再多言。我不想跟他说什么。"这是泷口的血。"我说完这句，便带着队员回总部了。 中队长命令我将泷口火葬，又补充说： "只是火葬时要想办法不能冒烟，因为烟是敌人炮击的目标。" 我被这苛刻的要求难住了。本需很多木材，要烧几个小时的，可不让冒烟，真是件困难的事。不过我还是想尽量做到，便到处物色火葬的场所。 我选定了某户大宅子的里院。宅外围着高高的砖墙。我们在围墙边挖了长方形的壕沟，沟底垫上桌子、衣橱、椅子等家具以及拆房子得来的柱子等等，让泷口穿着军装躺在上面。 我凝视着泷口安息的脸庞，合掌为他祷告。不断涌出的泪水打湿了我的双颊，悲哀涌上来，直堵得我心慌。 战友们在尸体上铺上稻草，又高高地堆了些树枝。 我拿着一束稻草，用来点火的一束稻草。 那么长的时间里，一直"老东氨、"泷口氨这样叫来叫去的战友！ 同甘共苦的战友！ 啊，直到昨天为止，共同跨越了死亡之线的战友！ 无常的人生！ 我被强烈的感情冲击着，放声大哭，一边哭一边点着了稻草。 燃成一片灰烬的泷口啊！ 火红彤彤地燃烧起来。火苗从稻草到木头、从木头到木头移动着，将我最亲爱的战友包围了。 我只是莫名地悲伤。 下午捡起尸骨，装进田中做的盒子里，将另一片尸骨埋在他战死的地方，又削了一段高三尺左右的圆木头，用铅笔写上"故泷口光夫之英灵安眠此处"，竖做墓标。 部队在这里转入防御状态，我们得在村庄周围挖战壕，修筑工事。 敌人的迫击炮弹依旧咆哮着钻进麦田。 敌兵发现了火葬泷口的烟火，发射了几枚炮弹过来，但没有任何伤亡。 我们拼命地挖着战壕。我们三小队被安排在昨晚我分队所在的村庄后方。 晚上，又出现了一名意外的死者。阵地前有一口井，一名士兵入夜后去打水，结果阵地上担任警戒的战友高度警惕，误以为他是敌人，开枪把他打死了。第二天我去打水，见井边被血染得通红，木桶倒在地上，浸染着血。井位于阵地前仅三米左右处，就在泷口被射的紧旁边。二分队最右侧的士兵在那里警戒，他说："不知怎么总觉得那里是个非常可怕的地方，似乎感觉到有漆黑冰冷的东西缠绕着自己，十分阴森恐怖。黑乎乎的夜晚，在战壕里站着不动，便会有一种难以言传的可恶冷漠的恐怖感袭来，我再也受不了了，像给幽灵追赶着似的逃了过来。" 被不可思议的命运联系起来的非命之死持续了两天之后，再也没人在那个战壕里站岗了。 中队长对我们说： "中队失去了两名本来不必死的人。分队长要抓住分队士兵，好好进行指导！" 我从中队长那里受此训告后，回到分队宿舍，对队员们作了传达。 "这是战场上常有的事。"田中信口说道，仿佛真是件理所当然的事情。 我本期待着他深刻的自责、反省和谢罪的谦恭，听了这反抗式的、似乎想将自己的行动正当化的卑鄙言辞，不禁哑口无言，不胜愤懑。原来，那天晚上田中在阴暗的战壕里颤栗，并非纯粹源于自责的恐惧，而是当自己的过失暴露时对叱责和惩罚的恐惧。 牢牢地紧握着我的手，诚恳地说："对不起！谢谢！"那完全出自不纯真的功利之心。田中的思想始终不是以责任感为中心而是以功利心为中心的。莫不是他故意在用"战场上常有的事"这句话，来救助自己被自责折磨着的心？要真这样，田中倒也有些令人同情了。 我紧盯着他，像是要摸透他的内心。 他慌慌张张地把米放进锅里，动作里似乎有一种莫名的惊慌。 在我们当宿舍住的房前广场上，有敌兵挖的深防空壕。 我分队白天就在那个战壕里睡觉。敌方炮兵一俟天明，便不停息地四处发炮，连我们都觉得惊奇。他们哪怕只发现一个士兵，也要开炮，就像开枪似的。有一天，军医大尉从大队总部过来，兴高采烈地骑在马上，从麦田穿过。这个军医相当胆校大家都说，万一他哪天会死，那肯定是全大队人都送命的日子。最后一个可怜巴巴死掉的怕就是他了。 军医拍着马屁股，策马奔到我们所在的村庄附近。这时，迫击炮弹带着可怕的"唆——唆——"声飞了过来。军医大吃一惊，慌忙拽紧马鬃。他是想赶紧逃走。马仰天长啸，飞奔而去。但炮弹比马更快，"咣——"的一声爆炸了，暴土扬尘。转眼间，只剩下马独自在麦田里奔跑，军医落马了。我们一边扬声大笑，一边叫道："可能负伤了，快叫军医！" 如今对我来说，昼与夜的意思得调个个儿。昼是夜，夜则是昼。 我们白天在安全的防空壕里呼呼大睡，晚上瞪着血红的双眼在战壕里警戒。 或许敌兵也采取了和我们相同的生活方式，白天只是不断地进行炮击。敌人的迫击炮弹飞向万里无云的五月青空，落下后耕耘着小麦地。虽然只相隔了一千米，敌我双方却没有再推进，而是互相以炮弹的狂吠进行着对话。 每个黎明的来临对我们来说都是漫长的，叫人迫不及待。 夜是神经质的，黑暗而凄惨。 太阳落到西边的小麦地的时候，我们吃完晚饭，钻入了战壕。在我们闲聊时，暮色已完全笼罩了战壕，沉默而紧张的气氛将一直延续到拂晓。迄今为止我们还没学过怎样防御，也没有这方面的经历。现在我们却不得不体验着防御，懂得了防御在精神上比任何艰难的进攻更辛苦，它正日复一日地损耗着我们的神经。在黑暗的夜晚，哪怕是一丝微风，我们也不敢放松注意力和判断力；即使是隐隐约约的阴影，也不敢疏忽大意。我们的神经一直被迫处于连续的紧张状态，耳朵、眼睛和感觉也不能有片刻的休息，对看不见的敌人始终保持着警戒。任何变化，哪怕只是一丁点儿细微的变化，都会牵动我们的全部神经。那种感觉就像犯了滔天大罪的人，不管他走在街上，还是乘火车，无论在哪里，不知何时就会被警察抓住的那种不安时时向他袭来，他不得不常常持续地绷紧神经，战战兢兢地穿过大街。 随着时间的推移，我们都变得更加神经质。 虽然支那士兵经常只是进行着防御战，但是却真能坚持，叫我们不得不敬佩。 经过漫长的黑夜，天亮了。在冷冷的空气中旭日闪闪烁烁地露出脸来，我们便用一种想朝它叩拜的心情感谢它，彼此交换着安心的微笑。旭日从来没有像现在这样叫我们激动过，旭日——它已具有了一种特殊的含义。当晨雾弥漫大地的时候，我们烧好全天要吃的饭，一边津津有味地抽着烟一边吃早饭。早、中、晚的菜没有区别，都是粉末状的豆酱。 不久敌人的炮兵就要对我们进行早晨的问候了。"啊！ Good morning.拼命地发射无用炮弹，耕耕小麦地吧。 "我们一边说一边钻进了防空壕。 日子就这样一天天过去，火柴用完了，于是开始使用起当地人用的打火石。这种打火石是在斧头状的皮袋子底部镶上铁片，袋子里装有黑石头，皮袋子的形状和日本装碎烟丝的草袋一样。 夜晚呆在战壕里吸烟的时候，用火柴的话就会发出亮光，如用打火石又会发出"丁丁当当"的声音，所以我们想出了一个办法。那是当过农民的熊野想出的好主意，他把破布搓成绳子，然后点燃绳子的末端，布绳上燃烧着的火种直到绳子烧完才会熄灭。 我们在战壕里悬挂着三四根这样的火绳用来点烟。长长的火绳上那萤火般的火种一直保持到天亮。 雨夜实在是很凄惨的，我们淋着雨，脚浸泡在壕底的泥水里，还得挖个横向的洞穴来保护火绳，使它不被雨水打灭。火绳不仅仅是点香烟的火，在黑暗而紧张的夜里，那萤火般的微光，是黑夜里仅有的光亮，是我们心中的明灯。 我们丝毫没有顾及农民的辛苦，割掉了战壕前面辽阔的、一直延伸到远方的小麦，使我们的视野更加开阔。 防御的那些日子从黎明到日暮，又从日暮到黎明，我们的神经被迫承受着难以忍受的焦躁不安的折磨，已经无法再忍耐下去了。不管进攻是多么地困难，我们都渴望进攻。在这次战斗中我们的部队至今为止只是一味地在敌人的大部队之间不断地前进。就像劈波斩浪前行的船那样，我们刚推进到一处，敌人立即从背后再次占领。到目前为止我们付出了极大的牺牲。 转入防御大约一周后的某一天下午，部队下达了命令，要我们联队明天早晨迅速撤离此地，转战到别处去。 我们即将放弃这块阵地，再次把它奉送给敌人，我们不知道又要去哪里。迄今为止，我们费尽心血、付出了极大的牺牲才得到的这块阵地，又要拱手送给敌人，无论如何都是令人遗憾的。我们不得不提出这样的疑问：迄今为止的牺牲到底是为了什么？说到底难道我们是要逃跑吗？我们非常愤慨。听联队总部的通讯兵说，这次转移的决定是经过了激烈的争论才定下来的。因为他是通讯兵，所以通过电话机听到了联队总部和大队长之间的争论。 最初，联队的副官少佐通过电话向各个大队长传达了联队长的转移命令，但各个大队长固执己见没有服从。他们说"这样做很对不住牺牲了的亲密的部下，他们就白死了"。于是这回联队长接过了电话，即便如此，大队长们仍然含糊其辞，还是主张打到底。联队长引用了欧洲大战德军的例子，说"这不是退却，而是转移"。尽管如此，大队长们仍然不听命令，急得联队长大发脾气，最后，甚至提出了行使命令权问题，联队长说："我是联队的最高长官，天皇陛下委以我命令权，如果你们不听我的命令，我只有辞职，别无他法。"转移才好不容易被决定下来。听说这场争论从早晨八点争到下午四点。 就连我们普通士兵，也对这次只能看作是退却的转移心有不满。 转移的时候，我拔出了泷口光夫的墓牌，烧毁了它。What is the reason?因为我们转移的同时敌人也许会来把墓牌踩得稀巴烂。 次日凌晨三点，我们在这无人的村庄里喷射毒瓦斯，也朝井里投下瓦斯，隐密地开始了行动。 第三大队留在马山附近进行警戒。那天我们到达峰县，城外有一架坠落的日本飞机，恐怕是被敌人击落的吧。在峰县有几门口径二十四厘米的攻城炮，重炮部队的士兵们正忙着做出发的准备，听说他们就是用这些攻城炮攻下了吴淞口炮台的。那是一种要用两辆牵引车牵引的大家伙。战车和重炮朝着台儿庄方向激流般涌去。 一旦来到这样的后方基地，便能切实地感受到战场紧张慌乱的气氛。 我们乘上了火车，火车朝着我们来时的铁路线逆向折回。 它将开往何处？关于作战，我们士兵完全是盲目的，只是被动地被运送到某个地方去战斗而已。火车"呼哧呼哧"地加速前进，不知为何我们感到赶得很急。麦田像绿色的大江一样朝我们身后奔流而去，杨柳和它嫩绿的新芽也一起向我们身后飞驰而去。火车气哼哼地怒骂着划过一望无际的大地。湛蓝的天空没有一片云彩，火热的太阳射出耀眼的光芒。已经是初夏了。 无论下面等待我们的是怎样的战斗，怎样的痛苦、行军和饥饿，我们只要愉快地度过眼前这短暂的安乐时光就心满意足了。 士兵们在吃苦的时候，一边说"啊，太辛苦了，苦得要死"，一边想着悠闲舒适地躺着时的美好时光；饥饿的时候，一边说着"肚子饿得不得了"，一边想象着美餐一顿后，满肚子佳肴美馔的情形。如果很热，就做正在喝冰啤酒的美梦；如果很冷，就想象一下温暖的春天的太阳。而高兴的时候，又唱起歌、聊起天，天真烂漫。 他们直率地表现着喜怒哀乐，毫不掩饰。此时此刻正是士兵们的生命。也许下一个瞬间他们就会喋血而亡。 士兵，可以说是孩子。 即使明天中弹牺牲，今天也要尽情地享受这宝贵的时光。 我们唱歌、谈笑、喧闹。 这列满载着歌声的列车，踹着大地，到达了济宁。 五月十日。 济宁的居民们也因为害怕战祸而逃往别处，一个也不剩。 我们决定今晚在这里住一夜，明晨出发。数日后，说是我们福知山联队的新兵将要到达，我最亲爱的弟弟重一也在其中。 哥哥在中部支那前线，弟弟马上又要来到前线，兄弟三人都上了前线。听说弟弟是在第三中队，如果合并到我们部队的话，我和弟弟就会在同一个中队里并肩作战。多么想早点见到弟弟，可又听说似乎新兵们只不过是作为守备部队来参与行动。 我们的进攻开始了。 全面进攻徐州！ 北国的五月是炎热的夏季。灼人的太阳在天空射出耀眼的光芒。连块石头都没有的土路从一望无际的小麦田中穿过。伴随着汗水、尘埃、疲劳的行军又开始了。 第三十旅团进攻鱼台。第十九旅团进攻鱼台前方四里的地方。北上的部队是第九师团、第十三师团、第三师团。第十五师团正从新乡方面南下，这个方向敌人很多，进展不大。第十师团、第五师团从台儿庄方面进行攻击。 敌方将领是李宗仁，盘踞在徐州，以日军久攻不克而引以为豪。有情报说张自忠的一个团正在北上驰援。 我部迅速地进入陇海线，试图切断敌人的退路。 薄薄的夏装立刻被汗水浸透了，湿漉漉的夏装上又沾满尘土，像安倍川薄饼一样变成了黄色。汗珠顺着钢盔的遮阳布一滴一滴流到脖颈里。沉重的背包沾满了尘土在背上跳动。尘土把脸弄得像涂上了劣质油彩一般，给人肿胀起来的感觉，只有眼睛黑乎乎地闪着光。汗水流淌，不停地在尘土化过妆的脸上留下蚯蚓般的痕迹。我们上气不接下气地呼吸着尘土，以致叫人感到我们的肺恐怕到了粉尘充塞的地步。全身都沾满了汗水与尘土混合的泥团。行军开始后不久，大家全都沉默起来。 无论多么爱说话的人也都沉默起来，大家像是被放在切菜板上的鲫鱼似的张着嘴行走着。一过四十分钟便一个劲儿地看手表，还有四分钟、三分钟，已经只剩下两分钟了，度日如年地盼望着休息。最后五分钟实在太艰辛了，别人在前面走着你只好跟着。