Chapter 5 Unforgettable Building One

One Sunday many years ago, a friend invited me to her house for lunch.Her home is behind the Beijing Foreign Languages ​​Institute in Weigong Village in the western suburbs.It was past two o'clock in the afternoon when I took my farewell after dinner.The overcast sky in the morning began to drizzle intermittently.It was late spring, and I was walking alone on a wet country road, my thoughts were easily nostalgic and sad.At that time, taxis in Beijing were not very popular, so I decided to go in through the west gate of the East Campus of the School of Foreign Languages, pass through the East Campus and exit through the east gate, and go to the main road of Weigong Village to catch a taxi.That is the campus I am most familiar with, and I have spent seventeen years of youth here.When you enter the door and turn right, the first thing you will see is the unforgettable No. 1 dormitory building.maybe after lunch people

I was resting, maybe the weather made people too lazy to go out, and there was no one on the campus at this time.I walked to the corner of the first floor and stopped involuntarily, looking at the second window on the west first floor of the "Work" building, so many past events came to my mind at once.I don't remember how many years I lived in the dormitory of about twelve square meters in this window.But I clearly remember that I worked hard in this small room to prepare lessons, correct students' homework, study hard, and hope to become an excellent English teacher. In the future, I will work hard in the field of English and American literature research. land.

I certainly remember more the misery I experienced in this small room. In August 1966, shortly after the "unprecedented" "Cultural Revolution" began, I was "caught out" on the third day after I returned to school from a temporary translation job for the "Emergency Conference of Asian-African Writers".I cannot forget the horrible experience that afternoon.I study documents with other teachers in the teaching and research group in a classroom on the third floor of the teaching building of the West Campus.At that time, I knew very well that bad luck was about to come to me, because when I returned to school, I saw that several posters had already named me, saying that I was a "gangster minion", "revisionist Miaozi", and most of the colleagues who used to get along day and night ignored me.Some friends only dare to say hello to me when no one is around.That taste is probably never to be forgotten.A heart hangs in the air, and at some point, the catastrophe will come.This afternoon, disaster finally struck.Sitting in the classroom, I heard chaotic footsteps running up the stairs, and there were always more than ten people listening to the sound.My heart tightened all of a sudden, my heartbeat accelerated, and I didn't know who was about to be picked out again.This person happens to be me!Those former students of mine rushed to the door of the classroom where the meeting was held, shouted my name, and asked me to stand up.At that time, the "revolutionaries" among the teachers were already prepared and immediately shouted slogans in cooperation.My legs were weak and I stood at the door.A live criticism meeting began.At that time, I was really frightened, my head was buzzing, I couldn't hear what they were saying.After the criticism meeting, I was expelled from the classroom where the meeting was held, because I had been declared a "gangster black line figure" and was not qualified to hold meetings with the revolutionary masses.I was escorted back to this small dormitory in Building 1.When I arrived at the door of my room, I immediately saw that the walls on both sides of my room were covered with big-character posters scolding me in various insulting languages.On both sides of the door is a pair of couplets, to the effect that I jump up and down for the gangsters, matchmaking.Just at the door of this dormitory, I accepted another criticism, and then I was asked to go back to the room to reflect and write an "account".

The past is like smoke, and when the smog clears, I am glad that I can still stand outside this small window and pay tribute to the past years.This cannot but be said to be a kind of luck.My gaze now turned to the first window next to me.It reminds me of the camaraderie and caring I still experience even in those brutal years.I remember that after I was "caught out", I was really scared and panicked, and I also felt a kind of indescribable despair.My lofty ideals that I cherished very much since I joined the Communist Youth League in 1952 and the Communist Party of China in 1957, and the ivory tower that I loved to study and learn since I entered the School of Foreign Languages ​​in 1953, collapsed in an instant , There was darkness in front of my eyes. The "revolutionaries" finally confiscated my books in the control clauses announced against me, saying that this was a hotbed for me to spread revisionism, and also confiscated my bicycle, saying that it was a tool for me to carry out counter-revolutionary cascades!When the rowdy crowd dispersed from my door, I curled up on my little bed, wanting to cry!It was getting dark, and I didn't dare to go to the dining room to eat, for fear of being criticized again and meeting acquaintances.I didn't even have the courage to read those big-character posters, because I really couldn't figure out how a young intellectual party member who had just turned thirty and was full of enthusiasm became a "gangster minion" overnight and became a member of the "enemy camp". people? !The teachers in the same room may also have sympathy for me, but they dare not talk to me too much.That night, I tossed and turned, unable to sleep, tears finally kept streaming down.The next morning, I was still afraid to go to the dining room. Fear and anxiety made me forget my hunger.At this time, shortly after my roommate went to the dining room to have breakfast, the door of my room was gently pushed open.My next-door neighbor, the owner of the room with the first window, Zhang Youyun, a young teacher from the English Department, and her husband, Song Mingjiang, a teacher from the Language Institute, quietly entered the room.They hurriedly handed me a jar of yogurt, two hard-boiled eggs, and said to me: "We heard you cry all night (because there is a wall shelf between the two rooms, so it is really just a board Don’t do this, you must take care of your health. Why don’t you eat? Just do whatever you want. Eat this breakfast quickly.” They said that the teachers in the room in the corridor had eaten, and they took the opportunity to secretly give me Send these food, but can't stay for a long time, for fear of being seen.After that, he hurried back to the room.

To this day, I believe that this can of yogurt and two eggs prompted me to calm down and think about the situation I faced.They make me believe that I am not alone, that not everyone sees me as an enemy, that my friends are still all around me.The thin rain began to flutter down again.I looked around and saw that the green space between Building No. 1 and the main building was lush again.Nature is amazing!Nearly twenty years have passed since I left this campus.That was the growth time of a generation, and the scenery here is actually the same as when I left it.Recalling that when I entered the School of Foreign Languages ​​in 1953, I had just turned eighteen!We young people have rosy fantasies about life and blue expectations for future career,

Entering this school, I am full of energy and confidence.More than thirty years of relentless years have passed.Of these carefree young people back then, which one didn't leave scars and tears on the track of life.Probably none of the previous owners of this building is gone.Some friends have finally become the pillars of the foreign language teaching circle; some friends have crossed the ocean due to various reasons, and now live on the other side of the ocean.A few years ago, I went to the United States and took the time to stay at Wu Qianzhi's home in Portland, Ohio for a few days.Wu Qianzhi and I are partners on stage.We once had a moment of brilliance on the stage of English drama in the School of Foreign Languages.We did Oscar Wilde's The Importance of Being Earnest.We also had the audacity to play Shakespeare's Othello in its entirety, with Karen Wu as Othello and me as Destamona.Qian Zhi is a very talented young teacher, especially in pronunciation teaching.However, a "Cultural Revolution" almost destroyed him.I never asked him why he stayed in a foreign country, but I think the scar was too deep, and he didn't want to touch it again!A few years ago, I seriously wanted to select some fragments of these two scripts and rehearse them with the original crew.I really, really want to.I never want to forget the beautiful dream of my youth. I always want to hold on to it, even if it is held for a short while, it can comfort my wounded heart.Unfortunately, this dream is hard to come true.Today, not only are the actors at that time separated from each other, but some of them have left this nostalgic and sad world forever.I stared at the gate of Building No. 1, and it seemed that the prosperous scene of us going in and out of this gate in twos and threes appeared before my eyes, and the lively laughter of many young teachers in the English Department at that time sounded in my ears.But this scene can never be repeated again.I am powerless to hold back history, let alone turn back time.

I think of our classmate and colleague Wu Pu.She also lived on the first floor of Building No. 1. She died a terrible death!It was the winter of 1967, which was thirty years ago.That year, after the two factions fought for more than a year, the higher-ups sent the Navy’s military propaganda team and the Beijing Fifth Construction Company’s workers’ propaganda team.It was the absurdity of the most absurd years.These soldiers and workers knew nothing about higher education, but they dominated the school as soon as they entered the school.They issued orders, and shortly after entering the school, they publicly expressed their support for one faction and beat the other faction.So, my friends and I suffered again.And this one seemed to go deeper than the shock of the summer of 1966.I was semi-isolated in the student's dormitory, "explaining" the so-called "February Countercurrent" and "Litong foreign countries" issues.This hat is much more serious than "Mob Minions". "Litong foreign countries" will be imprisoned!At that time, Wu Qianzhi was also guilty of "connecting with foreign countries".Qianzhi, Wu Pu, Zheng Gang, Mei Renyi and others suffered worse luck than me, and they were completely isolated.They were locked up for about three months. After the military propaganda team and the worker propaganda team extracted the so-called "revealing and confessing" materials by means of forced confessions, they were released one by one.On the day Wu Pu was released from isolation, when she went to the city to go home to see her elderly parents and young children and then returned to school, she did not enter the school gate, but went to the canal behind the school.It was the season of early winter.Wu Pu resolutely jumped into the icy cold canal!

Wu Pu is my classmate.She is a student with excellent character and academics. She graduated from the well-known Girls High School Attached to Beijing Normal University.I remember that she joined the party shortly after entering school and began to serve as the secretary of the Youth League branch.Before graduating, he stayed in school in advance to serve as the deputy secretary of the party branch of the English Department.Wu Pu is a very "orthodox" party member student cadre.Every political movement is a leader.But it was this "unprecedented" "Cultural Revolution" that forced a loyal party cadre like her into the arms of death.

I remember that the day Wu Pu threw himself into the river was a celebration day.At that time, whenever Chairman Mao's "latest directive" was announced, all the people would be dispatched, beating gongs and drums, and parading to celebrate.That night, maybe another Chairman Mao’s latest instruction was released, and I vaguely remember that another artificial satellite was launched into the sky. In short, all the teachers, students and staff of the school gathered to celebrate.I was confined in a student dormitory.The students were all going to the parade, so they had to take me with them.I remember that the winter night came early, at about eight o’clock, someone hurried to our team and called away a few tall male students in the class.I saw the tense expressions of the Red Guards, and they left after whispering for a while. I only heard them say that they would bring some long bamboo poles.I expected something big to happen, but I never thought it was Wu Pu!

Back in the student dormitory building, I saw some students discussing something in groups.When I saw me, I stopped talking.The next day, I still felt a tense atmosphere hanging over the dormitory building.All of a sudden, before dinner that day, the building was filled with new big-character posters, accusing Wu Pu of "cutting himself off from the people and from the party."I was stunned in front of the big-character poster, and stood there in a daze, unable to believe that Wu Pu really committed suicide.We have been classmates for four years, in the same classroom and in the same dormitory.Then we worked together for ten years!Why would she be so desperate and commit suicide?My heart wept for Wu Pu, but not only could I not show my sadness in front of people, but I was also forced to express my stance to "condemn" Wu Pu for "severing himself from the people" in subsequent meetings.what a crazy