Chapter 9 4. Do I have a childhood (2)

One of the important reasons why I like watching Lao She's drama "Longxugou" is that the protagonist Cheng Crazy, played by Yu Yu, can yell in a very authentic voice: "Sell it big, Jin (Jin) Yuyu, sell it thin Oh (little) Jin (gold) fish Yula ai (come) ai..." The "Xiao (small)" here is the key point of the whole sentence, it must be drawn long enough to clearly convey all the compound finals features.But I am also dissatisfied. In my memory, in the spring of Beijing, except for small goldfish, that is to say, all goldfish sellers also sell "Datian snails". Why did Madman Cheng forget to drink Datian snails?

My sister is only one and a half years older than me. I was influenced by her and her classmates’ play styles, and I played many girls’ games since I was a child: hopscotch, shuttlecock kicking, catching seeds (peach pits and glass balls), tying them with silk thread Sachets (small rice dumplings), and skipping rope.But then I started to be rejected by girls, and I also felt bored. For a few days I was obsessed with building a movie projector myself, because I knew how movies work and what visual traces do.What I want is to draw the animation by myself, bind it into a book, flip through the book quickly, and achieve the effect of watching a movie.Tried a lot without much success.

After all, I am a boy, so I slowly developed a wild way of playing, playing war on the wall, making pistols endlessly every day, and sometimes fantasizing that I would take advantage of a pistol that looked like a real gun and shout "Don't move!" !" Ga-gu, shot the "enemy" at his feet. But my bouncing game just didn't hold up.In the second semester of my junior high school, I went to Xishiku No. 4 Middle School to watch the baseball game between our school and No. 4 Middle School.The boys all took shortcuts and jumped off a wall. I hesitated, and when I got on the top of the wall, I wanted to jump but stopped. When I went down, my right ankle was twisted, and the pain was unbearable.As a result, I suffered a bone fracture in my ankle, and it took me more than a month, which affected my class. In the only semester, I didn't get in the exam.I tasted the taste of frustration. I saw my excellent grades clearly in my dream, but I saw failure on the report card.In the dream, I kept asking, is this real or a dream?The answer in the dream was, no, this is not a dream, it is real, that is, I did well in the exam even though my bones were broken.Such confidence was the source of my immense sense of humiliation: the more I believed in myself, the more humiliated I felt.

To put it bluntly, my childhood was still too timid.A friend of my father once gave me an eagle-shaped kite. I tried several times but still couldn’t fly it. When I read Lu Xun’s book, I felt that I was more pitiful than the younger brother and elder brother in the article. With brutal destruction, I have never been oppressed by the feudal cannibalism culture. First, I was timid, jumping off the wall, flying a kite and falling to the ground, unable to fight back, no need to be bullied by others, and it is impossible to defeat anyone... The past is gone, and today's Beijing is no longer the city it used to be, and it is impossible for all childhood memories to reappear in front of us.The sound of water at the back gate of Beihai Park is still the same, but the species of poplar forests have been updated, and there is no such rushing sound anymore.There is a lot of traffic and high-rise buildings everywhere, who can pull out a wooden pistol on the wall and shout "Don't move"?There are no more fireflies fluttering in the summer night, no flocks of black crows flying by in the winter sky, no orioles in spring, and no crickets in autumn.

In Xinjiang, my second son, Wang Shi, often makes kites by himself and puts them in the middle of the sky as soon as they are released.Some wishes are not fulfilled in my own generation, but the next generation is fulfilled, which is also happiness. On my 68th birthday, Master Hao Junqing, the driver of the Ministry of Culture, gave me a big centipede kite, saying that he read my article about kite flying, and he thought, isn’t it easy?Later, we had the experience of flying kites into the sky several times together.After all, all hope is in the world, and all human hopes are likely to be realized, although it may not be realized in sixty years.