When I was young, I was a child who was sensitive to some morbidity. On the one hand, this kind of personality made me pay close attention to my inner feelings, and on the other hand, I was clumsy in dealing with the external world, and I was afraid and guarded against it.The former led me to increasingly immerse myself in an intellectual life dominated by reading and writing and an emotional life dominated by sex and parent-child love, from which I obtained the most important pleasure in life, and the latter naturally developed into Indifferent attitude towards external utilitarianism.It may be said that my aloofness stems from my incompetence, but I am content with my incompetence in this regard.