Chapter 16 Chapter 5 Going out with the Army

Some people always say that when you get old and have nothing, you will chew on memories to live.However, not all memories in a person's life are beautiful and worth recalling.Maybe when you look back on the past, you will realize that all the encounters and all the possessions are so worthless.I even feel a kind of helplessness and sadness, like a piece of clean white paper being splashed with ink, no matter the ink marks are beautiful and vivid, or incomplete and sentimental, I want to find one that can erase the past. eraser to erase all.Maybe this is the only way to leave a blank, even if there is a little regret and a little loneliness, it is better than being immersed in the torrent of the past and being choked again and again.

Everyone's thoughts are different, so the life they pursue is also different, and the stories that happen will not be the same.Some people can drink all the flavors of life in a glass of boiled water, and some people feel tasteless even if they mix the ups and downs together.It is said that people who have gone through the years will have less love and less sorrow, but in fact, our love and sorrow, love and resentment, are all paid to the years in the process of walking.Nalan is a person who willfully indulges his emotions. His youth and talent make it impossible for him to throw away his love early.

Because of his frail health, Kangxi granted Nalan a leave of absence and stayed at home for a few months.These days, he didn't have to choose horses and saddles for Kangxi, he didn't have to work hard, he didn't have to go out early and return late, and he went back and forth on the golden palace and jade steps, living a boring life.Although it was only a temporary leisure, it also gave him great relief.Just like a hibernating ant, seeing the first ray of spring sun, my heart is very happy.It is also like a canary that has been imprisoned for many years, and the cage that imprisoned it is accidentally opened, and the feeling of freedom is unparalleled.

Every day, Nalan felt that he didn't have enough time to spend, and he didn't want to squander it like he was when he was young.Nalan gathered with many friends in Lushui Pavilion, made wine and tea, and talked about the past and the present.In his spare time, he searched for scriptures and history, intending to compile the vast five thousand years of culture into "Miscellaneous Knowledge of Lushui Pavilion".Together with his wife, he collected the scattered poems over the years and planned to compile a collection of poems.He cherishes this process very much, just like cleaning up the past mood.What happened in the past is replayed in the words, and the memory that was thought to be faded by time has accumulated more deeply.

We always think that forgetting is a kind of betrayal, so many times, we try our best to search for the stories that are about to be forgotten, and remind ourselves over and over again of what we once owned and lost.But I don't know that some things, forgotten or covered with dust, will have an ancient beauty.Wiping it hard makes the old memories that have been treasured for many years look frivolous and lose their proper taste.Just like a jar of wine that has been sealed for many years, if you open it from time to time, the rich aroma of the wine will evaporate in the air, and what you taste in the end is just a glass of fresh water.So many years of dust and waiting have become futile.Therefore, life is full of choices, it depends on how you and I grasp and choose.

As long as he has free time, Nalan will accompany his beloved wife to play in the garden, or go boating on the pond, or play among the flowers, or read under the moon, or draw water to plant plums, or fold willows to cherish.It seemed as if they wanted to live a year as if it were a day, lest they would have to endure a long parting if the emperor called.So that in the end, Nalan lost his beloved wife forever, and he could only miss her by recalling the good things he had. "In the flower path, play hide-and-seek, once provoked Xiao Xiaojing Wuye. Do you remember the light fan, and it was cool and hot again." , Yan wax chicken shreds."

What a warm scene, if it is a painting, there are flowing images; if it is a word, there is a gentle singing; if it is a song, there are silent clouds; It is a curtain of dreams, but there is a touchable temperature in it.However, for all these images, when a person passes away, the old dreams can only be revisited in memory.All fate is derived from cause and effect, and the length of fate cannot be increased or decreased by you or me.Just like a person's lifespan, at the time of birth, it is doomed how far it will go.Going to that hurdle, no matter how manpower can save it, it will not help.Therefore, we should use our limited life to try our best to do what we can and want to do, and leave a period of no regrets in our life.

It seems that many people will say this sentence: Everyone falls into the world to suffer.The person who says this is not necessarily a negative person.Indeed, dust comes and goes, and in this short life, we have to experience far more suffering than enjoying happy time.Of course, these also depend on a person's mentality. If one's heart is bitter, everything will be miserable, and if one's heart is happy, everything will be happy.Not all sunshine can make people happy, and not all misty rain can bring people sorrow.When we have it, we must know how to cherish it, and when we lose it, we must believe in resignation.Maybe only in this way can life be less painful and more joyful.

When we have a deep understanding of a person's past, we will understand that there are reasons for his sorrows and joys, his joys and sorrows.Just like Nalan, his words are mostly works of parting and sadness, and these emotions are not all inexplicable.After a few months of unemployment, Nalan received an imperial decree from Kangxi ordering him to go on an expedition with the army before he woke up from his dream.Perhaps it was to test his ability in martial arts, perhaps it was to temper the poetic soul and courage of this romantic talent, and perhaps it was to achieve the military splendor of a passionate man. In short, Kangxi gave him such a chance, but his profession is Although the bodyguard is an officer, he does not command the army. He is just a dispensable pawn in the Chuhe Han world.It's like that although he is a close minister of the emperor, he doesn't participate in politics. He is just a most elegant scenery in the Golden Palace.For so many years of official career, Nalan has always kept a distance from state affairs and military affairs, which is a ditch that he will never be able to cross.

The night before the farewell, Yimei snuggled into Nalan's arms, she was full of reluctance in her heart, but she kept smiling at each other.She will always be like this, hiding her sorrow deeply and giving Nalan warmth.She cherishes every day with Nalan, because when she was very young, her mother asked a fortune teller to tell her fortune. When she was nineteen years old, there was a life-and-death gateway. Life is over.Charlatan warlocks are always like this, judging a person's life to two outcomes, like a bet, winning and losing half, so he will never be a loser.Lose is won, win is won.Since Yimei was sensible, she has believed in such a little bit of fate. She once made a wish before the Buddha, willing to exchange her short life for a man of peerless beauty.

Later, the Buddha made her perfect, but she was always worried that what the fortune teller said would come true.This is a secret, she will hide it in her heart until she dies.This farewell made her feel even more dignified, but God still missed her and gave her an unexpected surprise.When Nalan learned that his beloved wife was pregnant, the surprise was beyond words.In fact, in his life, there have always been more surprises than sorrows, but many joys were not what he wanted.But this time, this young new life brought him shock.Because he felt that everything about him would be continued in another little life. Nalan took his beloved wife into his arms and promised that he would definitely come back before the child was born.He will accompany her, looking forward to that little life coming to the world.Although this world full of prosperity always gives him a lot of loneliness, he hopes that the flesh and blood of his closest relatives can surpass him.After all, Nalan is just like us, a mortal with flesh and blood, love and hate, joy and sorrow, evil and good.His sorrow is our sorrow; his pain is our pain; his joy is our joy; his happiness is our happiness.People in the world are connected. Among thousands of people, there must be one you and one me.We may meet each other one day, and we may always be strangers, living our own lives in our own lives.Can't meet, live in peace. The melancholy colorful clouds fly, what does the blue sky know? Shaking hands with West Wind and tears, I have been parting for many years. Riding the horse and raising the dust seems to be the way to say goodbye forever, leaving the wind and smoke all the way to others, and going on a more confused journey by yourself.In this vast and ethereal world, he is barren, so barren that only a few poems can express his heart.Maybe we were all actors in the previous life, but in this life, we're going back and forth to cover a drama destined to be sad.