Chapter 167 Known Fate No Reversal

Back at Cuimei Nunnery, I saw Master Miaochen looking at me anxiously at the entrance of the main hall, and when she saw me, she hurriedly greeted me. I hurriedly asked: "Is there any news from the palace?" She breathed a sigh of relief, smiled and looked at me helplessly: "It's not that there is news from the palace, it's because your child has been out for so long and hasn't said hello, so I'm really worried." After finishing speaking, she held my cold hand, Lianxi said: "Hurry up and go back to the house to warm up first, it will freeze to death."

Along the way, Master Miaochen took my hand, walked through the corridor, and followed me to my wing. The cold body was slowly melted by the warm fire, gradually warming up. Holding a warm cup of hot tea in my hand, I felt a numb pain. Mrs. Miaochen didn't ask me anything, she knew that if she wanted to say something, I would say it myself. I recovered from the long cold, looked at Mrs. Miaochen, and asked: "Master, do you think the carriage can still travel along the way?" The teacher looked at me intently: "You mean you want to go out in a carriage?" Looking at the expression of the teacher Miaochen, she actually knew where I was going in the carriage, but she didn't expose my words.

I nodded: "Yes, I want to get out of here." Master Miaochen replied: "It's not impossible, it's just that the snow is too deep, so there are certain difficulties and risks." "That's fine, let's leave today." I said calmly, and said the word "leave" very lightly. Mrs. Miaochen looked out of the window, turned her eyebrows and said to me: "It's getting late, and the snow is still falling. If there is any obstacle on the road, it will be very troublesome when it gets dark. I guess the snow It will stop at night, you can stay one more night, and I will send someone to take you away tomorrow. How about this, okay?"

I didn't want to go against Mrs. Miaochen's wishes, so I nodded lightly: "Okay, I will follow Mrs. Miaochen and leave tomorrow." Master Miaochen held my hand tightly, and said with concern: "Have you thought about everything?" I smiled and said, "Yes, I've thought it over, I'll go this time, there will be no future, please take care." I said the same words to Mrs. Miaochen, because I know that I won't come again. "Okay, as long as you decide, do it according to your own ideas. Back then, I was like this. I decided to stay in Cuimei Temple, and I will never leave again."

"Yes, you cherish it." I looked at her in front of me, this person who is my closest blood relative, I want to leave her and never see her again.I really wanted to ask her some things she remembered, those things in Dayan, but I gave up because I didn't want her to recall anything.She has already calmed down, so why should I stir up the waves in her heart. "Okay, you cherish it too." I could see that she had a lot to say to me, but just like me, she swallowed it in her heart.Because she also understands, whether we say it or not, we all know it deep in our hearts.She and I are not close friends in the mountains and rivers, but we are better than each other.

There is really no need to say anything, even though there is reluctance, we understand and respect each other. During the evening class, I went to the main hall and worshiped the Buddha with them. Thousands of lotus lamps illuminated the entire hall, as if the Buddha had cast a golden body, and the light hurt my eyes.The dense sandalwood lingers in the hall. I close my eyes and smell the pure sandalwood, feeling the tranquility of Zen. "Buddha, I don't give up. In fact, I don't give up here, I don't give up." I raised my eyebrows and looked at the Buddha, and said excitedly.

The Buddha looked at me with a smile: "I know, you still have reluctance in your heart, but you can only put your reluctance aside and choose the reluctance that you don't give up." "Reluctance to give up." I repeated, almost laughing, the Buddha actually wanted to make me happy, the so-called reluctance to give up is Chun Yi, the palace.He knew where I was going to leave Cuimei Temple. Buddha smiled peacefully: "Since the choice is made, go on, no matter what the ending is, go on according to your own choice." I nodded: "Well, I will." "I didn't expect that a woman with such wisdom as you really doesn't belong here in the end. After all, you are still tired of love and can't end everything." The Buddha sighed, with a hint of helplessness in his voice.

I smiled slightly: "Not all women with roots of wisdom end up here. I will not be tired of love, I am a cold person, my departure is not for love, not for righteousness, I just want to leave, Because I don't want to live my life in such a dull and peaceful way." The Buddha raised his eyebrows and smiled: "Yes, everyone has their own aspirations, and no one can force others. Leaving may not mean misfortune, and staying may not lead to happiness." I looked at the Buddha and asked, "Buddha, in fact, you knew my ending from the very beginning, didn't you?"

The Buddha didn't evade, just nodded: "Yes, I knew it from the beginning, because the Buddha knows everything." I looked at the Buddha proudly, and asked again: "Do you think fate can be changed?" The Buddha's eyes were deep, and he replied: "There is no turning back in the river, and it takes a lot of human resources to deal with it. The destiny is not that it cannot be changed, but it depends on how you change it and how to reverse it. During this process, you have to pay a price that is difficult for ordinary people. Many Sometimes, even if you pay the price, in the end, nothing can be changed. Therefore, the only thing you can try to change is the process, and it is too difficult to change the ending."

"Buddha, what about you? Can you change? You have boundless magic power, and you should be able to change people's fate." I was still asking, I don't know what the reason for this persistence is. Buddha said: "I can, if I go against the sky, of course I can, but do you know the price? You can't imagine, so I can't." "Change for me, do you dare? Are you willing?" I was actually joking tentatively, but my expression was serious, as if it was real. The Buddha may have stopped asking my sudden words, and before he had time to think about whether it was true or not, he frowned slightly, and then smiled again: "You child, you always make fun of Buddha, aren't you afraid?"

"What are you afraid of? Does the Buddha, who is merciful and smoky, punish a woman for making fun of her? Even if it's not a joke, would you punish her?" I was almost domineering, and the Buddha couldn't get angry. The Buddha looked at me calmly: "Yes, the Buddha will not punish anyone, the Buddha is merciful, and the Buddha will tolerate everything." "Then are you willing to change for me? Go against the law of heaven and change my fate. You know that I will leave this time and there will be no end of time. You know my ending, would you want to change anything for me?" I asked. Keep asking him, is so reluctant. The Buddha looked at me with a smile: "I have known you for several years, will I still not know your disposition? Even if I am willing to change for you and go against the law of nature, you will not want the ending like that. As proud as you, and How could you want my help? If you are as kind as you, why would you want me to pay the price for you?" The Buddha's words touched my heart, and it turned out that the Buddha was so clear to me. I pretended to be slightly annoyed: "Buddha, you didn't answer me, your answer was just to make excuses for yourself." The Buddha smiled peacefully: "This is your satisfactory answer, because you don't want to know the real answer. If I say I am willing, but you will not let me change anything, but leave with a heavy body. Free and easy like you , why would you want such an answer?" Every word and every word the Buddha said was in line with my heart. I smiled and said: "Just a few words, you praise me like this, you are proud and kind, this will be free and easy. If I am really like this, how can I have so many struggles? If I am really free and easy, And don't leave again." "Leaving does not mean that you are not free and easy, it is because of your compassion, your arrogance, all of these, only you understand best. What you want, only you understand." Buddha pointed directly at my heart, it seems that I think He has already seen through what he thought. "Okay, I understand, Buddha, thank you for your love to me, and thank you for your company over the past few years. Maybe I am not a woman with real wisdom, but I have realized a lot of truth in the artistic conception of Zen Buddha. flavor." I spoke sincerely, and every sentence came from the bottom of my heart. "It's my fault that I can't save you." The Buddha sighed, with pain and helplessness in his eyes. I shook my head slowly: "No, everything is my own choice. Since I have chosen, it is the best ending. I will save myself, and you don't have to blame yourself." It seems that we all understand in our hearts that this time I What kind of facts will you accept when you go to Zijin City? "But I still want to bless you." The Buddha looked at me with pity and reluctance in his eyes. "Okay, I accept your blessing. You once told me that Buddha is everywhere, so even if I go back, you will know everything about me, and you will be by my side, won't you?" "Yes, the Buddha is everywhere, and the Buddha will always be by your side." I kowtowed: "Okay, then bid farewell peacefully." Buddha nodded: "Okay, let's leave peacefully." "Treasure." I put my hands together. "Treasure." Buddha looked at me again. Back in the wing room, I ordered Hong Jian to pack up my clothes and leave tomorrow. That night, I went to bed early, and I said goodbye when I had to say goodbye, and my heart felt much more comfortable.After a while, I fell into a dream. In the dream, I returned to Zijin City, and everything was like the scene when I just entered the palace.Sitting in a sedan chair, surrounded by Luanyi guards and guards, I walked on the imperial street, turned around pavilions, and arrived at a large hall. I raised my eyebrows and looked at the big characters painted in gold on the plaque: Yueyang Palace.Such a familiar scene, such a familiar word, Chunyi inscribed it for me. Back then, I wrote a couplet for these three characters: Spring is cold and the willow is thin, and the moon is as small as the eyebrows.Now all this is happening again in the dream.I feel like this is a dream, not a dream, just a trance. When I was about to enter Yueyang Palace, none of the people who were with me just now were gone.Pushing open the door, the flowers and plants that used to be inside no longer exist, and there is a barrenness in front of my eyes.Going to the back room, the three big characters of Meiyuntang are still there, and the plum blossom in front of the hall is vigorous and powerful, without losing the style of the past. Go to Nuan Pavilion, enter the door, and see Chun Yi lying on my favorite pear wood chair.As soon as he saw me, he got up immediately, walked quickly, held my hand tightly, with a gentle face, but didn't say a word. No matter how I talk to him, he doesn't seem to hear, he just smiles at me gently. But in an instant, his face was pale, he coughed violently, spit out a big mouthful of blood, and then passed out. I was awakened by this sudden change, sat up suddenly, felt a sharp pain in my heart, and spit out a big mouthful of blood. Hong Jian panicked: "Miss, miss, what's wrong?" I shook my hand lightly: "It's okay, it's okay." "Well, why did you vomit blood again." She wiped the corner of her mouth for me. My heart beats faster, and I have an ominous feeling, Chun Yi, Chun Yi. Looking at the anxious Hongjian, I said in a low voice: "Don't disturb the teacher, I'm fine, I just had a nightmare, and it's just because of a moment of urgency." "Well, rest for a while, we have to hurry tomorrow." Hong Jian carefully pressed the corner of the quilt for me, and I lay down slowly. The snow outside the window has stopped, there is no sound of wind, it is so quiet, this kind of quiet is scary.Could it be that everything is really over like this, is it really necessary for me to have regrets, I hope my premonition was wrong, I thought, tomorrow I will return to Yueyang Palace, and it will be the same as before. I sighed in my heart, Chunyi, even if we can't do it all over again, I still want you, I really want you.