Chapter 10 not the end of the end

It's been a sleepless night.The four good friends stayed under the four roofs, but they tossed and turned all night, with lingering feelings. Chen Yu slipped out of the house like a thief that night, dug a deep hole on the lawn of the community, and buried the sand painting of a mirage.The sand painting that went back and forth was not displayed in the cabinet like the collections that she had traveled all over the world to search for, but was buried deep in the ground. She burst into tears and thought: In this life, she will never have such a beautiful and pure love again.Her love has been buried underground, and what walks in the world is just a body without emotion.

She finally ended the most pure love in her life with her own hands. She flew to Dunhuang to find her love like a moth to a flame. She thought she was going to accomplish it, but it turned out that she just buried it with her own hands. And Mi'er was lying in the guest room listening to the sound of Li Jia's footsteps walking up and down next door, and felt pain in her heart, as if every step he took was on her heart.She finally found out that she was really in love with Li Jia. The so-called love means caring about the other party to every footstep, right? However, at the same time, she found desperately that the more she loves Li Jia, the more clearly she perceives Huihui's existence.It was as if Hui Hui reunited with Li Jia through her body, and she couldn't resist the feeling of returning from a dead body. She was almost crazy by emotion and reason, as if she was in a vortex between the two realms of darkness, knowing that she was about to die, but she couldn't break free. .

She thought suffocatingly: Unless she broke up with Li Jia, otherwise, it would be impossible for her to shed the dual identity of "murderer" and "stand-in". There is also Lu Yu who has dual identities. Those who can heal do not heal themselves. She learned psychology in vain, but accidentally let herself fall into the gap between melon fields and plums, and she couldn't even face herself. In a few months, Tong Gang will be released from the labor camp. She has waited for so long to wait for this long-lost reunion day.However, why is she hesitant when she is more timid near the hometown?Fleeing in Xi'an, the foot injury is certainly an objective reason, but is it also an excuse for her to avoid meeting Tong Gang?After five years of separation, she and Tong Gang are already people in two worlds. Is it possible to get along well?

Uncontrollable emotions are the product of this kind of mentality of worrying about gains and losses, right?When people are unable to make a decision on a certain proposition, they often arouse extraordinary emotions, and use new troubles to cover up the previous troubles, as a way to decompress and escape.Therefore, the more passionate people are, the more merciful they are, and the more unlucky people are, the more they run into walls everywhere.The original intention of self-seeking troubles is to avoid troubles, which is a subconscious way of decompression, that is, trouble replacement.

Sadly, Lu Yu, a good psychology student, chooses one of the most failed alternative ways to relieve stress: falling in love with her friend's husband. Yue Keyi truly recorded the troubles and problems of the four good friends in her new work, but she couldn't give the story a perfect ending.One word echoed in her head all night, forming an echo that grew stronger: Divorce, divorce, divorce! This story started with Mi'er's marriage, is it going to end with her own divorce now?It was accidental and inevitable that her husband fell in love with her good friend.Because even if it wasn't Lu Yu, it could be anyone, anytime, anywhere, and for any reason, Professor Qian fell in love with another woman, thus putting himself aside.

Keyi doesn't hate Lu Yu, and she's not even angry with Professor Qian, because she understands clearly with the empathy of a writer: this is just a temporary ambiguity, without any actual actions, and there will never be any results.There is not even a question of fulfillment and abandonment here. Even if they divorce themselves, Professor Qian and Lu Yu will not get together, but will only avoid them. But she still mourns the instability of emotion, and the fragility and hypocrisy of marriage.She reluctantly maintains this tasteless marriage, the only reason is the true relationship they once had, and now, even this is not sure, so what is the meaning of her marriage to continue to exist?

Every woman is lonely, every housewife is desperate, every marriage is helpless, and every story has an answer.Only the knots in the hearts of these four young women could not be opened. But it doesn't matter, their friendship has stood the test of time, and they are planning to meet once on December 31 to count the bells and pray together.At that time, they will sit down, get together, and be open and honest, so that all questions can be answered.That day will come. However, when all the truth comes to light, will there be a solution to their entangled emotional questions? Xiling Snow

Sunday, December 11, 2005 in Xi'an Baliu Ecological Park