Chapter 10 chapter Ten

Ling Yang remembered that in the fall of that year, she passed the hell again. When the mind is completely awake and able to sit up and eat normally, I am afraid it will be after the "Lidong".Early one morning, it was Lian Qiao who came to her bedside to change her dressing. For a while, she couldn't remember what year and month she was in, but the pain of changing the dressing made her forget about it for a moment.She gritted her teeth and endured it, not wanting to look down at her injury—although many things were still in confusion in her head, she still remembered the horror of that arm.She wanted to ask if that arm was still there, but she found that there were beads of sweat on the tip of Lianqiao's nose. She hadn't heard her own voice for many days, and when she blurted it out suddenly, she scared herself , she said hoarsely: "Are you back?" Lianqiao's shoulders seemed to shake heavily, she stopped what she was doing, and looked at her carefully, tears flowed down quietly, Lianqiao Said: "Madam finally woke up."

Then she found out that Lianqiao came in with Dr. Luo every day during her comatose more than a month, and Lianqiao was worried about others, so she had to change her medicine by herself.In the most dangerous days, as in the past, I served day and night in front of the hospital bed.At first, Dr. Luo really thought that Xiaoru sent someone to invite him, but it was just another ordinary consultation—until, like everyone else, his knees became weak from Xiaoru's heart-piercing screams.He also didn't think carefully about why Xiaoru took out the hemostatic medicine that was treasured in the mansion so quickly and gave him every scene in that early morning, so that Dr. Luo still felt a kind of pride when he recalled it. At least he stopped the bleeding quickly and calmly, and decisively gouged out the unsuitable meat.It doesn't matter how much the Tang family promises to pay, he will do his best to save her life. He has practiced medicine for so many years, and such times are rare—it can make him feel very important, as if he is facing thousands of troops alone.He dug out the medical books and dust-laden prescriptions that he had collected for many years, and went to visit familiar colleagues in the past and expert people who heard about him, day and night.In the meantime, Ling Yang had a high fever, and was tortured by the chills like a pendulum, shaking his whole body, and the wound kept oozing frightening pus and blood... He prescribed different decoctions one after another, and prepared good decoctions. Several kinds of plasters that he had never tried before were handed over to Forsythia, and every few days he would clean up the wounds and cut off the carrion—he regarded the stumped arm as a plant infested with insects, even though she was in a coma , People all over the house could also hear the wailing that seemed to be possessed by evil spirits.

Until the end, Dr. Luo didn't know that everything in front of him could be said to have happened because of him.Naturally, he didn't remember at all what his drunk self had said. Finally, the dawn of the rest of the catastrophe arrived.It came slowly and hard, and almost everyone could hear the sound of it pushing open the two heavy rusty doors. Ling Yang couldn't really chop off that left arm, a slender woman without that strength.But on the exposed bones, she did cut a few deep knife marks.She was lying under the quilt, staring at the original left arm - it had been wrapped into a white stick, and she vaguely felt that her fingers were still inside.When she was finally convinced that she was alive and was going to live, for some reason, all that came to her was anger.When Forsythia changed her dressing, no matter how painful it was, she endured it by force—but after she finished enduring it, it was Forsythia who was unlucky.She would coldly say to Lianqiao: "Get out." Lianqiao said without changing her expression, "Madam wants to rest, so I'll go out first." But when it was time to change the dressing the next day, she would Showed up on time.Sometimes Ling Yang had no choice but to add another sentence: "Get out, let your master get out with you."—Even though she was already filled with hatred, her tone of speech was always indifferent, for no other reason, she really I don't have the energy to yell at anyone.Lian Qiao still said unhurriedly: "Let's get out now. But madam, don't forget, without him, madam may not be able to lie here and lose her temper with me right now."

Sure enough, after losing an arm, everyone dared to bully her.Thinking of it like this made her feel sad, and it wasn't until this moment that she realized what she had done.She wrongedly said to Niang Hui: "Let Forsythia go, I don't want to see her again." But Niang Hui just looked at her tenderly, gently stroking the hair scattered on her face: "I know Madam was flustered, but when the accident happened, Lianqiao immediately came back to take care of Madam, her clothes were untied, and when Madam talked nonsense and couldn't swallow the medicine, Lianqiao would put it into Madam's mouth one by one. What?" Ling Yang dodged Hui Niang's fingers irritably, it was true, everyone joined together, she complained indiscriminately: "What else are you serving, what are you doing to save me, let me go down to accompany the master No." Hui Niang actually smiled: "Madam, tell me what to say..."

After a long time, she asked in a daze, "Has Mr. Xie gone home yet?" It was already the time when all sides were besieged, so she missed her only ally very much. "Madam has been injured for almost two months, how could Mr. Xie have any reason for not leaving?" Hui Niang patiently explained, "However, he did not leave until he heard from Dr. Luo that Madam's life was safe. Before leaving, he also told me that when Madam is well, he will choose a day to send someone to formally propose marriage to our sister Wei." One day, when the dressing was changed, she suddenly felt less pain, at least she didn't have to bite her lip to endure it desperately—she thought maybe it was because the pain was so long that she was dead.As winter came, Xiaoru had already built a charcoal brazier in the house, and put a small heater on her bed.Forsythia came less frequently—not because she really listened to her advice and got out, but because she no longer needed to change her medicine every day. "Ma'am, it's raining outside today, with some snowflakes here and there." Lian Qiao spoke to her in a leisurely tone while inspecting the wound.Ling Yang suddenly asked in a low voice: "Do you know anyone? Have you ever seen that kind of snow? Is it the kind of snow inside?" Forsythia's eyelashes flickered like the wings of a disturbed butterfly: "No Ma'am, although I said I was in the north with my mother when I was young, but I don't remember anything at that time." "Mr. Xie must have seen it." Ling Yang said enviously. "Of course. Mr. Xie has traveled far and wide, even among men, he is considered well-informed." Lian Qiao laughed.Ling Yang suddenly realized that he was talking about Xue with Lianqiao just like this, and immediately closed his eyes gently as if trying to cover up something.I secretly scolded myself for being so unlucky.

Lan Xin and the third girl came to see her almost every day.But the two of them sat there, crying every now and then, which Ling Yang never got tired of watching.Then one day, Lan Xin came in alone, sat down by the bed in silence, no longer weeping, just sat in a daze, so Ling Yang knew that the third girl was taken back by her uncle after all. "Madam is so stupid." Lan Xin said. Ling Yang smiled feebly: "I also want to be smart." "Ma'am, by doing this, not only hurt my body, but also hurt everyone's hearts." The resentment on Lan Xin's face is always just right. If Master Chuan can appreciate it, it will be the most nuanced, "Third Miss, too. She always told me that in this way, she would never dare to see Madam again in her life, and she would always feel that she owed Madam."

"I don't hold grudges with my aunt, so let her rest assured." Ling Yang wanted to sneer, but after all, she felt that it was too labor-intensive. Even if she died, for Lan Xin, the first thing to remember was Or would her death put the third girl in an embarrassing situation - Lan Xin always loved the third girl the most, it was not her fault, it just made Ling Yang feel more lonely. But she said that she didn't hold grudges against my uncle, which was true.Anyway, she had to find a way to stop those rumors, but she lacked an opportunity, and this incomprehensible son-in-law was an opportunity given to her by heaven.Since her left arm was crippled, she has been able to understand Uncle better—in fact, in the final analysis, he is just a little handicapped.The earth-shattering sound of firecrackers outside made her tremble with fear. I heard that on the second day of the Lunar New Year, my uncle and the third girl came to pay New Year's greetings together. They also came with the third girl's father-in-law, the former magistrate of Wu County, who is now the new prefect of Qingzhou.

It is said that the money borrowed from the Tang family was put to some use after all, and the injustice case of Wuzhi County reached the ears of the Shandong chief envoy.In that year, for the matter of raising horses, the "East Three Mansions" and "West Three Mansions" fought again in Shandong.The chief envoy is in a state of desperation, and has long been suspicious of the prefect of Qingzhou.Qingzhou was originally rich, but the magistrate was greedy and didn't know how to advance or retreat.In the dispute with Dongsan Mansion, he often couldn't understand the hints from the chief secretary, which made everyone embarrassed.This time, the unjust cases of several Huizhou merchants in Qingzhou Prefecture were simply a gift from heaven. The Chief Secretary took the money and naturally wanted to avenge Wu Zhixian.Zhaoxue was unjustly imprisoned in Wuzhi County, and was promoted from "Tongzhi of the Fu" to the magistrate.However, only 20% to 30% of the silver taels and goods confiscated by those Huizhou merchants were recovered, and the whereabouts of the rest is unknown.As for the wrestling between the former prefect and the chief secretary in the capital, probably even the prefect of Wu—no, prefect Wu himself is not completely clear.

This time, Prefect Wu brought his son and daughter-in-law to the door to thank him. As for the misfortune his own son had caused, Prefect Wu never mentioned it, and Master Chuan tacitly did not mention it either.Wu Zhifu only said that the Tang family has such a virtuous woman as his wife in charge, and Master Chuan's character and character are absolutely unmistakable.As long as Master Chuan passes the upcoming examination, Prefect Wu will definitely do his best to help Master Chuan—now Prefect Wu is already the Chief Secretary’s confidant, his foundation in the capital is different from the past, and his speech has become reserved Get up and be more confident.Master Chuan is not stupid, knowing that the prefect Wu is also apologizing in this way, one of his wife's arms has bought back Qing Yu for herself, and unexpectedly added a layer of guarantee to Master Chuan's future——Master Chuan said Don't say it, but I feel it's a good deal in my heart.So he responded to Wu Zhixian with a modest smile. It was because his wife was too stubborn, so she didn't need to care about those rumors that were purely slanderous.Over a cup of tea, everyone talked and laughed happily, and all the problems between the men were resolved. Of course, Ling Yang was still lying on the sickbed in the bedroom at that time.

When spring came, Ling Yang was finally able to remove all the bandages and took a closer look at his left arm.Although it wasn't cut off, it couldn't be lifted at all.From under the elbow to the wrist, there are five or six shocking depressions in this short section, as if the skin and flesh have collapsed inexplicably, and a good section of the arm has become cracked in the dry season. The miserable river bed.Fortunately, it can be hidden in the sleeve on weekdays, but it won't scare others.The hands exposed outside the sleeves looked fine at first glance, but there were only one or two fingers left that could barely feel the warmth.When Ling Yang stood in the courtyard again, letting the watery sunlight shine on her body, she couldn't believe that her body, like being tied to a weight, would involuntarily tilt to the right.For some reason, the unconscious left arm seemed to make the left half of her body light, like a kite that could be lifted three feet from the ground in the wind, while the body on the right became the person who released the paper kite—no need to be reminded, she I also know that when she walks now, she must look like a cripple.

She no longer goes to Lanxin's room to practice calligraphy, and rarely goes to Yunqiao's room to chat.She hardly left her room, wishing that everyone in the Tang family mansion could forget her when they were busy with their duties.In this way, she is no longer sensitive to the passage of time, she is just living towards death, so why bother to figure out which year and which solar term she is living in.But she didn't know, maybe it was because she didn't care so thoroughly that her appearance hadn't changed for many years.Until one day, Xie Shunhui sat in the master's study again and said to her: "This year, the old lady is not in good health. In my opinion, it is better to change the banquet for the widows held by the house to the lady's birthday." She smiled lightly, noncommittal .Xie Shunhui said again: "There is nothing inappropriate. Madam is thirty years old, and it is also a big birthday. It is worth doing well." She was startled: "On the 24th of June this year, am I going to be 30 years old?" Xie Shunhui smiled: "Exactly. I don't know Ma'am, in some places in Jiangsu and Zhejiang, June 24th is the birthday of lotus." She smiled sadly: "It's really the first time I've heard of it, what a coincidence?" At that time, to be precise, it was the autumn of the twenty-sixth year of Wanli.Ling Yang was still struggling, and Hui Niang didn't know if she should start sending people to contact the coffin master again.The people in the whole mansion lived in an atmosphere of awe, what Ling Yang did was like ringing a huge bell vigorously in the sky above the mansion.After the ringing of the bell, the reverberation of "buzzing" faintly shook everyone's ears—they all tacitly thought: If the wife really died, it would not be their fault, and they just chatted with someone they trusted. Those gossips are nothing more than human nature, even if the wife becomes a ghost, she should be able to understand it.These thoughts were all in their hearts, they just sighed in unison, and exchanged glances that they thought they had never dodged: "Madam is a poor person." The more times this kind of sighs, the more inexplicably there is a little comfort : Clothes and food are really useless sometimes, God has decided to make you suffer, there is always a way. It was on such a night that Hui Niang sat alone in the conference room.All the accountants who have gone back to their work have already gone to sleep, and all the account books that should be read have been read, but she doesn't want to move.Limbs melted into the chair, more at ease than when she was in her own bedroom.Of course she heard the door being gently pushed open, but she remained motionless.Following her, she raised her face and looked at Hou Wu. After hesitating for a moment, she still smiled: "How do I feel? I haven't seen you for a while." In fact, she told him to do things every day, and every morning Hou Wu was the first one. A person waiting outside the conference room with his hands down.He also understood what she meant, she meant that he hadn't been alone with her like this for a long time, when everyone couldn't see him. "How are you doing with Wisteria?" She asked quietly, "Wisteria is a kind-hearted person. If she has been wronged, she will never tell me. You must treat her well." He didn't answer, as if she didn't either. Wait for his answer.She suddenly smiled slightly: "Hou Wu, do you think it's strange? I know that after Madam cut off her own arm, her first thought was: Madam must not die. The house is really tight right now. I have a place to go, and I just asked Mr. Xie to borrow three hundred taels, but I couldn't afford the funeral expenses. When the master returned to the west, the clan helped me, but the wife's funeral can no longer be relied on by the clan. There is no such rule. But we have to talk about ostentation, everything is missing... Tell me, am I a housekeeper who has lost my heart? But I don't want to think about these things, someone has to think about them, right?" Hou Wu silently walked in front of her chair, and suddenly knelt down.He put his arms around her waist and pressed his face against her chest.In the astonishment, she felt his body trembling, and her fingers gently stroked his neck, she sighed a long time: "You miss me, but this?" He made up his mind to stare at her face: "I killed Madam. I was the one who spread the gossip. I got Dr. Luo drunk. He has no capacity for alcohol. I don't even know that I said it..." He was incoherent , but she still understood. "Aunt Hui, please drive me away. I'm the son of the accountant. That's the one, the accountant who was forced to death by the master. I came to the mansion. At first I wanted to seek revenge, but the master died and the old lady went crazy. At first I just wanted to shame the mansion, but I didn't expect Madam to be like this... I don't have the face to stay in the mansion any longer, and to be favored by Aunt Hui every day. If something really happens to Madam, you will have someone tie me up Go to the official, I never thought of harming my wife..." Seeing her looking at him calmly, he finally calmed down. "Let me ask you," Hui Niang bent down and cupped his face, "Back then, you...was it just to shame the mansion?" Hou Wu shook his head vigorously, his eyes felt warm. "Of course you want to say no." Hui Niang smiled, "If I were you, at a time like this, you would have to bite to death and say no." He kisses her. She stumbled from the chair and stood up, and he also stood up from the ground, and they staggered and burned together.He pushed her forward until her back touched the cold wall.Her lips caught his tears.She hugged his back tightly, turned her head hard, and then turned back to stare into his eyes. She whispered, but it was very clear: "I believe you. I will not mention this to anyone. God knows I know. You are not allowed to go anywhere, I will not allow you to go - if you stay here, this home can belong to you and me. No, there is wisteria, it belongs to the three of us, you..." Hui Niang He smiled bitterly, "Are you stupid? Even if your enemy is the master, even if you hate him—I've already slept in your arms, isn't that enough? You have already humiliated him, why bother to plot against him?" Madam? You are not the kind of person who is really cruel, why do you have to embarrass yourself? " He remained silent and began to tear her clothes skillfully. There was no way he could explain this to her.Every time he entered her body, he never had the idea of ​​humiliating the master—because the bliss she gave him always made him feel that he had come to the boundary between heaven and earth, and made him look forward to it with shame. , Live and die with her at that moment.He knew he shouldn't have this dream, she just looked up and found him in years of loneliness, so he hated, so he wanted to do something bad when he hated, so he would never let her know that he had been like this Seriously hated it. When it was almost the second watch, she wrapped her jacket tightly around her chest, and said with a coquettish smile, "Go back, Wisteria is still waiting." He smiled strangely, and said seriously: "Aunt Hui, I promised Wisteria , this is the last time." As soon as the words were out of his mouth, there was a wave of despair in his heart, and he knew he was fulfilling his promise—he knew he couldn't.Her eyes seemed to be filled with tears: "Okay. I understand. You and Wisteria can live a good life."——She also knew that of course he would come back. At dawn, Xiaoru got up and went to the toilet to empty the toilet.It is reasonable to say that this should be the work of the little maid, but now everyone in the seedling house is so busy that the division of labor between the personal maid and the little maid is not as clear as usual.On the way back to the room, he bumped into Hou Wu who was dressed neatly.Xiaoru only said that Housekeeper Hou Wu got up earlier than anyone else, but he didn't know that he didn't sleep all night.A few stone slabs away from the road, Hou Wu stopped Xiaoru who was passing by with her head down: "Is Madam okay?" Xiaoru raised her eyes anxiously, then lowered her head again: "I don't know Well, the fever has not subsided, Dr. Luo said it will take a few days. Sister Lianqiao has to cut off the bad meat every day when changing the dressing, I dare not look at it..." She felt that she was talking too much But the head was already hanging down, and it couldn't be lowered anywhere else, so I had to stop my mouth in embarrassment and didn't make any movement. She heard Hou Wu's voice coming over firmly: "You go, so that you can serve Madam. You just remember that in the future, any matter in Madam's room will require any manpower, or Madam herself has any errands, so that it is inconvenient to let too many people I know, I need to send someone who is more considerate... You just come to me. I will take care of Madam's affairs as the first in the whole house." After a short pause, he added, "Madam is really not easy, As servants, we have to understand her difficulties, don't you think?" Xiao Ru didn't think about why Hou Wu suddenly said such strange words - could it be that according to the order in the mansion, besides the old lady, the madam's affairs should not be the top priority - why bother to come here and treat it as a major matter Preach like that?But Xiaoru didn't have time to think so much, just agreed with a blushing heart, remembering the toilet still in his hand, so embarrassed that he wished he could turn into moss between the stone slabs, so that he could go into the ground with them. Ling Yang still didn't know that he now had a real confidant. In the twenty-ninth year of Wanli, three full years have passed since Lingyang mutilated his left arm. Xie Shunhui sat in the study of his house, waiting for Master Chuan.Two years ago, Young Master Chuan failed the exam - this is not a surprise. Since then, he has always come to Biyang Academy in Shexian County, staying for at least half a month to learn from the gentlemen here During the sparring sessions, I also had fun with the students here, during which time I often visited Xie's house. Although I failed the Jinshi exam, my life became more and more comfortable, and it was much more lively than when I was always at home.At first, Hui Niang was worried that Master Chuan would follow Xie Shunhui to indulge in the fun, but later she realized that Master Chuan might be aloof and her interest in wine and sex has always been limited, just for fun, never too much, so she was relieved.Looking at his own room again, Lan Xin lived a life of innocence and asceticism all day long, only holding the title of "young mistress" alone in the empty boudoir; and Mei Xiang, who made the decision to take the house for him, was also a She is pretty, but since the birth of his little brother, Master Chuan seems to feel that the mission of continuing the incense has been fulfilled, so he has become indifferent towards Mei Xiang, and it is rare to go to her room once or twice a month—— Mei Xiang was born with the bones of a concubine, so of course it is not a fuel-efficient lamp. At first, she thought that mother and son could compete for favor, but later found that the life of the Tang family was indeed leisurely, and there was no need to compete for favor, because anyway, Master Chuan was right. No one is indifferent.She made a fuss, cried, and tried to live and die, but later found that it was useless and meaningless. Since then, the interest in telling stories has diminished a lot, or rather, she has become discouraged. Xie Shunhui watched him step over the threshold, and for a moment had mixed feelings that he couldn't describe.The boy who was as handsome as a girl many years ago has grown up. Although he is still handsome, he has completely lost the cold and thinness of that year.He learned to show Mr. Xie a social smile, and learned to fold his hands skillfully like a man. Even when he opened and closed the folding fan in his hand, his fingers had a power that was not there before.Master Chuan's status in the Tang family's mansion is indeed different - in the past, even though he was the only young master who established a household, after all, it was talked about by everyone.But since winning Juren, the surrounding country gentry have flocked to please him, and what they value is nothing more than the fact that Juren doesn't have to pay taxes.Outside the clan, more than a dozen families are willing to allocate part of their own land to the Tang family. Master Chuan saves them taxes, and the land rent they collect every year will naturally go to the Tang family.As a result, the economy of the Tang family mansion was suddenly well off.The first Hui Niang already had a little fear when she treated Young Master Chuan, so the servants didn't need to mention it.The so-called spring breeze refers to Master Chuan. In recent years, he has become more open-minded and heroic in every gesture, and his appetite has increased accordingly.Once a person gains weight, he will lose his spirituality. Of course, this is just Xie Shunhui's vision--Master Chuan is not actually fat, but he is stronger than before. In the eyes of many women, he is just now. Well, when he was a boy, he seemed too unworldly, but now he has a lot of worldly things mixed into his whole body. What women like is always a proper kind of dirty. After all, he has also reached his thirties.Xie Shunhui stood up to greet him, not knowing that there was still a little loneliness on his face. "Why didn't Mr. Xie come to our house?" Young Master Chuan sat down and complained with a smile, "It's been several months, please can't invite me." Xie Shunhui smiled wryly and said: "It's not because I offended your wife, she lost her temper, how dare I come to the door casually to make things worse." Young Master Chuan said with a leisurely smile: "Since Madam broke her arm, her temperament has become more and more eccentric. Mister is clearly thinking of her for her sake, but she has become angry instead." Xie Shunhui said: "Forget it. In a few days, Madam will figure it out by herself, and she will ask Hui Niang to write to me." Master Chuan stared at him deeply, and sighed: "If you want me to say, a woman who has been widowed for many years is really pitiful. Look at Madam, she is not yet thirty years old, and her temper is becoming more and more like an old woman, with a domineering and domineering--Mr. I also know that Madam's self-mutilation has given her a great reputation in the clan, and even elders like Liugong and Eleven give her a bit." Master Chuan shook his head, "I remember that when the old lady was not sick, she would not be sick. Like her." Xie Shunhui remained calm, in fact, he was very unwilling for anyone to say that about Ling Yang, he said flatly: "Actually, Madam is also doing it for my own good, and I am doing it for your Miss Wei's. " The cause of the incident was as follows. A year ago, Xie Shunhui's youngest son, who was married to Sister Hu, contracted typhoid and passed away.It took only seven or eight days for a child who was only ten years old to die from illness.This made Xie Shunhui's hair gray a lot within a month.After the great grief, the first thing she did when she woke up was to ask someone to go to the Tang family to propose a divorce.Master Chuan has already come forward to agree, but Ling Yang is not sure, insisting that there is no reason for a daughter to marry two husbands' families, and she must still join Xie's family with her spiritual position when she reaches her age.The toughness of the attitude made everyone at a loss.Since Madam disagreed, Master Chuan couldn't make the decision by force.A few days later, Xie Shunhui came to the door in person and brought up the matter of retiring, but Ling Yang lost his temper. On the dining table, a bowl of boiling hot soup was thrown at Master Chuan. When he got to the little servant girl who was serving beside him, he burned a string of blisters on the little girl's hand, and then walked away angrily. Master Chuan sneered softly, this sneer was his favorite expression in the past, a cold light flashed in his deep pool-like eyes, and he has fascinated many women in the brothel over the years: "Sir, there is no need to persuade her anymore, she insists If you want to let Sister Wei get married, it is better to follow her wishes. She is just afraid that if Sister Wei refuses to guard the family, and everyone has gossip, her reputation will be ruined—she has not done so now. The extra arm can be cut off, of course you have to be careful. In my opinion, she thinks about the memorial arch way too much. In fact, as long as she lives in peace until she is fifty years old, how can she not give it to her? It is all her own imagination. There are so many cutscenes..." "Don't talk about this, we'll discuss it later." Xie Shunhui's expression was still calm, but his heart was already full of boredom. "Next year in February, we will have another exam. If we win this time, everyone will be happy." "Speaking of which, Madam is so bewildered that she wants the memorial archway, I'm afraid that sir is also contributing to the flames?" Master Chuan didn't intend to change the subject at all, "I went to Eleventh Duke's mansion on the night when the incident happened, and Eleventh Duke sent Mrs. Show me the letter from Shi Shigong. The old man likes to see such a woman the most, and he doesn't think about anything other than admiration. However, the handwriting of that letter, I can tell at a cursory glance that it belongs to Mr. My family Madame definitely doesn’t have this literary talent—I just wonder why Mr. is so enthusiastic about a woman’s archway.” "You don't understand." Xie Shunhui smiled faintly, he actually felt offended, "I respect your wife." "Sir is a well-known weirdo, I know it. It's just curiosity, nothing else." Master Chuan straightened his clothes, squinted at his shoulders, and opened the gap between his chin and shoulders. An elegant distance, "Originally, I wanted to tell my husband today that a friend in the academy celebrated his birthday and invited us to have a drink. He specifically said that he wanted to invite him over. In the evening three days later, I don't know if he will show his face. ?” "I will go." "That couldn't be better." Young Master Chuan's smile deepened, and there was a subtle vortex in his eyes, "Also, that friend specifically asked me to tell Mr. that there are no girls at his birthday party. He called an actor who is familiar with him. If an actor comes to sing, he is not afraid that no one will help him. Sir, you can also invite your Qimen Xiaodan from the South Hall. Don’t worry, sir, my friend knows that he is the treasure of sir. He is just invited to have a drink, and no one will neglect him. I also heard that a new kid named Li Yu who got up in the south hall recently is very good, and his face is like a lotus in water. Can you please come? I want to see and see, anyway, I am tired of women, one by one, they want me to accompany them to act as a concubine, to live and die together, I am still alive..." Xie Shunhui stood up, and said coldly, "Go ahead. I won't drink your friend's birthday wine. I'm not feeling well today, so forgive me for not giving it away." After finishing speaking, he turned around and looked out the window , ignoring the terrified little book boy next to him—the little book boy was not sure if it was really time to see off the guests. He just thought desolately: Where did that child who was as clean as a powder makeup and jade carving go?The child's expression was cold, as if all the emotions and desires in the world would stain his soul... Where did he go?Why is all the cleanliness gone, but only the soiled ruthlessness remains? In the thirty-first year of Wanli, the year has passed, but Mr. Ling Yang still asked Xiaoru what year it is.Xiaoru patiently answers every time: "It's the Year of the Rabbit, madam." After answering, Xiaoru himself will be suspicious, is it true that madam's memory has deteriorated?But apart from the year, I don't think she forgot anything else.In fact, Ling Yang didn't really forget, she was just confused from time to time - her sense of time became more and more chaotic, sometimes it felt like time flies, and sometimes it felt that a day and night were as long as a lifetime.In short, it has been so long, why is it still the Year of the Rabbit. Sometimes Xiaoru would worry and say: "I'll go to Mrs. Chuan's house and borrow some books for my wife to read, okay?" She shook her head and smiled lightly: "Forget it, I get a headache from reading too many words." But Xiaoru really can't think of anything other than reading that can be done without two arms.Ling Yang was used to spending several hours in a daze, and his whole figure seemed to freeze.But later, Xiaoru finally found a job for her, she helped Xiaoru trace the embroidered flowers.After practicing for a while, one arm is enough.Xiao Ru will deliberately find those very cumbersome and complicated drawings for her, and she will do it bit by bit slowly. Often, after drawing a delicate peony, she feels that the world outside the window must have passed a thousand years. "Ma'am, a few days ago my sister took me to a play, but I only watched the first half of it. It was very good...Madam, have you ever heard of it? It's called "Embroidered Jade Pavilion"." He squinted his eyes and quietly looked at her focused profile.Xiaoru's mother fell ill a few days ago, so Ling Yang gave Xiaoru a vacation to go back and have a look-the theater should be during the days when she was at home. Ling Yang shook his head seriously.Naturally, she didn't know that in the past six months, a new Qingyang Opera play suddenly became popular all over Huizhou.Whether it is the grass troupe of temple fairs or the domestic troupe of rich families, "Xiuyu Pavilion" has been performed everywhere. Xiao Ru enthusiastically told her about the plot, and she listened to each other, but in fact, many of the stories in the play have a similar pattern, but for some reason, as long as this familiar routine unfolds gradually, no matter how you say it, it still makes people feel uncomfortable. People have a faint excitement.He said that he had expected it to be really boring, but he still wouldn't be so boring that he left the scene and didn't watch it.From the confusing description since she was young, she roughly understood that this play is about a woman named Wenxiu, who was originally the daughter of a small family. On a snowy night, the girl and her father generously and kindly received a poor man. A sickly heroic man.Like all plots in the play, this man named Shangguanyu is just a son in distress. After returning to his previous life, thinking of the old kindness, he married Wenxiu.In this way, Wenxiu became the general's wife.The husband led the soldiers to fight, and then Wenxiu could only think about how the two of them were inseparable on weekdays.But one day, a battle report came from the frontier, and Shangguanyu died. "The way I see it, since it's a war, maybe this Shangguanyu didn't die at all, he was injured and disappeared. At the end of this play, Shangguanyu will come back, so everyone is happy. It's been a full moon, but it's like this?" Ling Yang asked. "This..." Xiao Ru frowned distressedly, "It doesn't seem to be the case, but I don't know what will happen in the end." 她以为小如的话音落了以后，这屋里的寂静不过是再寻常不过的，可是却突然听得小如的呼吸声似乎紧张了起来，然后慌忙道：“哎呀夫人，是巧姨娘来了。”然后慌忙地起身，招呼小丫鬟搬凳子，自己再急着去泡茶。令秧听见云巧说：“不用忙了，说两句话儿就走。” 那声音里没有一丝一毫的笑意。 令秧继续盯着手底下那只描了一半的蝴蝶，没有抬头去看云巧的脸。她并不是真的冷淡古怪，只不过是自惭形秽。如今，她只消轻轻一转身，便感觉得出左边身子那种恶作剧一般的轻盈，然后身体就会如趔趄一样往右边重重地一偏，她能从对面人的眼睛里看见一闪而过的惊异与怜悯。她也讨厌那个如不倒翁一般的自己，所以，她只好让自己看起来不近人情，看起来无动于衷。 “你别总站着。”她并没有听见椅子的声响，因此这么说。 “站着就好。”云巧轻轻地翘起嘴角，“我只想问问夫人，夫人为何这么恨溦姐儿这个苦命的孩子？” “你这话是怎么说的。”令秧笑了，终于仰起脸，她早就知道，会有云巧来向她兴师问罪的一天。 “我知道夫人跟溦姐儿不亲，这里头也有我的不是，溦姐儿刚出生的时候不足月，谁都担心养不活——夫人那时候刚从鬼门关回来，身子那么虚，我便把这孩子抱回我屋里跟当归养在一处。这么多年，她吃什么，喝什么，穿什么玩儿什么病了吃什么药，操心的也全都是我。我疼她就像疼当归一样，他们小的时候，拌嘴打架了我都要当归让着她——因为我念着她出生不易，念着她是夫人的骨肉。也可能是一直跟着我，她对夫人生疏畏惧些；而夫人更在乎当归是老爷留下的唯一香火，偏疼当归一点，都是自然的……只是我怎么也没想到，夫人可以真的不顾溦姐儿的死活，如果不是恨她，夫人如何舍得把她往火坑里推，葬送她的一辈子？”云巧的手指伸到脸上，恶狠狠地抹了一把眼泪。她脸上此刻的惨淡，令秧似乎只在老爷病危的时候才看见过。 令秧感觉一阵寒气从脊背直冲到脸上，她心里一凛，脊背立刻挺直了：“你这话从何说起，我还真不明白。咱们家和谢家的婚约定下的时候，人人都觉得这是好事。天灾人祸，谁也不能预料。咱们家是什么人家，这么大的事情又怎么能出尔反尔？何况，哪有一家女儿许两个夫家的道理？你们都说不愿意溦姐儿还没出嫁就已经守寡，可是你看看三姑娘，倒是夫君还活着，她过得比守寡又强到哪里去了？谢先生不是旁人，把溦姐儿送到谢先生家里，谢家富甲一方不说，她也会被人家当成亲女儿来看待，又保住了名节，这究竟哪里不好，你倒说与我听听？” “夫人说得句句都对，云巧人微言轻，一句也反驳不了夫人的道理。可是夫人对溦姐儿这孩子，除了道理，真的就什么都没了么？云巧想跟夫人理论的，是夫人的心。溦姐儿的心也是夫人给的呀，难道夫人眼里，除却名声跟贞节牌坊，再没有第二件事了么？” 一阵哀伤像场狂风那样，重重地把令秧卷了进去。忍耐它的时候让她不得已就走了神，听不清云巧后面的话究竟说什么。令秧在心里嘲讽地对自己笑笑，也许她已经真的笑出来了，笑给云巧看了：所有的人都有资格来指责她，说她薄情，说她狠心——她知道蕙娘虽然嘴上什么也不说，但心里却站在云巧这一边，好像她们都可以装作不记得溦姐儿这孩子是怎么来的，好像她们都已经真的忘了这孩子身上背着她的多少屈辱和恐惧。这说到底其实也只是她一个人的事情，如今，她们都可以事不关己地变成圣人，没有障碍地心疼那个苦命的孩子，任何一个故事里总得有个恶人才能叫故事，原来那陷阱就在这儿等着她。 云巧终于在对面的那把椅子上坐了下来，身子略略前倾，感觉她的眼神柔软地剜了过来：“夫人，不管你怎么嫌弃溦姐儿，只求你念着一件事。这孩子，她救过你的命。” “你这是同谁说话？”令秧尽力不让自己的声音发抖。 “我知道我冒犯夫人了，我跪下掌嘴可好？” 令秧用力地站起身子，冲着门旁喊道：“小如，送巧姨娘出去。” “夫人不用这么客气。”云巧恭敬地起来后退了几步，才转身扬长而去。她最后的眼神里，盛满着炫耀一般的恶意。 这一年的“百孀宴”那天，令秧就三十岁了。这件事还是谢舜珲告诉她的。 虽说当日为着退婚的事情，他们大吵过一场——不，准确地说，是令秧一个人同谢舜珲怄了好久的气，可是过一阵子，见也没人再来同她提退婚的事情，又觉得没意思起来，在某天装作若无其事地问蕙娘，谢先生这么久没来了，可是家里有什么事情？ 在这个家里，现今人人都敬着她，她只要一出现，无论主子还是奴才，原本聚在一起的人们都会自动散开，在她手臂尚且完好的时候，她从未感受过这种，因为她才会弥漫周遭的寂静。这种寂静不像是只剩蝉鸣的夜晚，也不像是晨露兀自滚动的清晨，这种寂静让人觉得危机四伏。总会有那么一个人先把这短暂的寂静打破，率先垂下手叫一声：“夫人。”然后其他人就像是如释重负，先后行礼。她若是觉得某日的饭菜不合口，哪次的茶有些凉了，或者是中堂里某个瓶子似乎没摆在对的位置上……所有的人都会立即说：“夫人别恼。”随后马上按她的意思办了，她起初还想说：“我又没有恼。”但是后来她发现，人们宁愿用这种小心翼翼的方式打发她，他们就在那个瞬间里同仇敌忾，把她一个人扔在对岸，她没有什么话好说，只能保持沉默，顺便提醒自己，不要在这种时候又歪了身子。 只有对着谢舜珲，好像她才能想高兴便高兴，想伤心便伤心，想生气就摔杯子——因为只有他并不觉得，残了一条手臂的令秧跟往昔有任何的不同。不知不觉间，他们二人也已经相识了快要十四年。虽然谢舜珲年纪已近半百，在令秧眼里，他依然是那个潇洒倜傥，没有正形的浪荡公子——他头发已经灰白，她却视而不见。 “夫人三十岁了，我有份大礼要送给夫人。”谢舜珲不慌不忙地卖着关子。 “准又是憋着什么坏。”她抿着嘴笑。 “夫人到了日子自然就知道了。” 怕是这辈子都忘不了，前年，在她自己都差点忘记她的生日的时候，谢舜珲到唐家来拜访，在老爷的书房中，送给她一个精致的墨绿色锦盒。她打开，见盒子里面也是一本跟盒面一样，墨绿色缎面的册子。她心里一面叹着这书好精致，一面翻开——起初还不明就里，两三页之后，她难以置信地把它丢出去，好像烫手。不经意间再往那锦盒里一瞥，却见盒里还有一本《绣榻野史》，更加乱了方寸。谢舜珲微笑地看着她道：“慌什么，这也是人家送我的，放心，我还没打开过，特别为了避嫌。”她面红耳赤，瞬间又成了小女孩的模样：“拿走拿走，什么脏东西，亏我还当你是个正经人。”谢舜珲一脸胸有成竹的表情：“夫人这话可就岔了，饮食男女，不过是人之常情。对夫人而言，私下里偶尔看看，权当取乐，不让人知道便好——守节这回事，本意为的是尊重亡人，只是太多糊涂人曲解了这本意，以为守节必定是得从心里灭掉人之常情的念想，夫人看看这个尚能排解些杂念，最终为的还是成全夫人的大节。不是两全其美？”令秧大惊失色，是因为明知道这全是歪理，可是这歪理由他嘴里说出来，不知为何还有些道理。谢舜珲笑了：“夫人若实在觉得为难，看几日便还给我就是了，就当是我借给夫人的。”令秧怒目圆睁道：“你做梦！若我看过了再拿给你看，那才是真正的淫乱。”谢舜珲开怀大笑了起来：“好好好，我早已说过了为了避嫌我动都没动过，夫人还是自己好生收着吧。”令秧悻悻然道：“我才不看这脏东西，我拿去烧了。” 她当然没有把那本春宫图册烧了，她趁小如不在的时候把那盒子藏在了一个只有她自己才有钥匙的匣子里。锁上匣子的时候她听见自己的心在“突突”地跳，她拍拍胸口安慰自己道：“只是偶尔看看，应该不打紧的。” 她自己并不知道，在所有参加“百孀宴”的宾客眼里，此刻的她才更像一个孀妇。她的左臂藏在了袖子里，她的衣服都特意将左边的袖子做得更长一些，便于掩盖那只僵硬，萎缩，三个手指难堪地蜷曲的左手。她的脸色更白，神情肃杀。也不知是不是巨大的创伤损害了身体的元气，她的嘴唇看起来也没有前些年那么有血色。走路的步态也僵硬了好多——只是，席间的孀妇们真的很想在心里说：唐夫人还是老了；却转念又觉得这话讲得底气不足。她的脸依旧光洁如玉，眼角也依旧整齐得像是少女，所有伤痛的痕迹都明白地写在她脸上，却没有令她变得苍老。沉淀在一颦一笑间，那种坚硬的痛苦让人无法把目光从她脸上移开。她整个人像是凝成了冰——其实冰层并不结实，往日的鲜活，往日的柔情，都还在冰层下面隐隐地流淌着。 令秧自己却浑然不觉，她只知道，她努力让自己端正地走出来，坐下，站起来，再坐下——她唯一想做到的便是不让自己的身体因为失去平衡而羞耻地倾斜。她不知道为何众人印在她身上的目光都变得犹疑；她也不知道为何那几个算是长辈的孀妇同她讲话的语气也变得有些逢迎，全然没了前几年的挑剔；虽说不知道，可她已经习惯了。 今天的戏，就是那出小如跟她讲过的《绣玉阁》。 文绣接到了上官玉的死讯，肝肠寸断——自然又赢得了不少在座孀妇的热泪。从此，文绣矢志守节，终日缟素，打算将人生剩下来的时光都用来冰清玉洁地等待，等待终有一天去往阴间和上官玉团聚。可惜这人间总是不能让人如愿的——若所有事都如了愿也就没人愿意看戏了。文绣的公婆原本就嫌弃文绣出身寒微，上官玉一死，找了借口将文绣赶出大宅，安置在偏远地方一座破旧房子里，只剩一个贴身的小丫鬟跟她相依为命。可是文绣不在乎日子过得苦，她还把这破房子起名为“绣玉阁”，在文绣眼里，这里才是她和上官玉的家。一日文绣带着小丫鬟去破房子旁边的庙里进香祈福，厄运就来了。一个纨绔子弟偶遇她们，惊讶于文绣的美貌。为了接近文绣，专门挑了冬至大雪的夜晚，装成路过的染病旅人去敲门。文绣也知道为陌生男人开门不妥，可是她毕竟善良，叫小丫鬟放男子进来，做热饭热汤给他吃。男子感激不尽，临走时，突然拿出一只翠镯，冷不丁地套在文绣手腕上。说是表示感谢，说他还会再来。文绣知道自己上了当，她恨这人利用了她善良的柔软，她也恨自己以为每一个求助的旅人都能如她的夫君一般是个君子……羞愤之余，她用力地想要摘下腕上的镯子，这镯子却是怎样都摘不下来。于是，文绣毫不犹豫地挥起小丫鬟平日里砍柴的柴刀，斩断了这只左臂。 ... 所有人的目光都印在了令秧身上，她们的眼睛集体把正旦孤零零地抛在了戏台上。只有令秧一个人，难以置信地盯着那戏里的文绣。文绣还在那里一唱三叹着，如泣如诉地对她阴间的夫君说话： 令秧艰难地站了起来，转过身便离了席，径直往后头走去，小如赶上来想搀扶她，也被她推开。她疾速走着的时候那姿势便愈加狼狈，但她不在乎了。 她用力推开了老爷书房的两扇门，谢舜珲安然地坐在那里等着她：“夫人为何这么早就离席了？戏还没演完吧。” “这出《绣玉阁》，是你写的？”她的眼睛很久没有如此刻这样，刹那间被点燃了。 “我说过，今年有一个大礼要送给夫人。” “为什么，你为什么把我写进戏里？”令秧的脑袋里乱糟糟的，她遇上了一件完全无法理解的事情。 “完全没有轻薄夫人的意思。现在整个徽州的人都知道了，休宁有个贞烈的妇人就如文绣一般；也可以说，整个徽州的人都以为，文绣就是夫人；还可以说，文绣令他们想起夫人。这戏已经演到了徽州知府大人那里，知府对夫人早有耳闻，看过这戏以后，更是钦佩夫人。夫人可还记得我那个写过的朋友汤先生？”谢舜珲不好意思地笑笑，“我的文笔自然不好，青阳腔的辞藻也比较俗。我把这本子送给汤先生看过了，他很喜欢这故事——他答应我，把《绣玉阁》改写成一出昆腔，修饰得雅致一些，汤先生虽说已经不在朝中为官，可是在礼部还是有很多故交。这《绣玉阁》只要能演到京城去让汤先生的这些旧同僚看到……” “会怎么样？”令秧似乎想到了什么，可她不敢相信自己想到的事情。 “谢某也不敢保证——只能说，徽州知府愿意把夫人的事情呈报给南直隶总督，再呈给礼部——若礼部的人也有知道《绣玉阁》和夫人的……也许夫人的牌坊，用不着等到五十岁了。” “早前你跟我说，该怎么让朝廷知道我的事情，你来想办法，这便是你的办法，对不对？”令秧重重地深呼吸，眼泪涌了上来，“可是戏里那个文绣，她不是我啊，我没有文绣那么好。”承认这个，突然让她很难过。 “夫人不必非得是文绣不可。夫人只需记得，没有夫人，便没有文绣。”谢舜珲耐心地注视着她，“谢某不才，一生碌碌无为，除了写点不入流的东西也全无所长……” “你不是碌碌无为。”令秧清晰地打断了他，“你成全了我。” 那个夜晚，令秧梦见了自己的死。她看见了自己的身子变成一缕青烟，飞出了唐家大宅，柔若无骨地，飞到了油菜花盛放的田野。田野尽头矗立着几座贞节牌坊，其中有一座是她的。但是在梦里，她怎么也看不清那牌坊的样子。也许是，她本来就不知道那牌坊究竟长什么样吧。——下次去给老爷上坟路过的时候，一定要好好看看。她在心里愉快地对自己说。她也分不清是说给梦里的自己，还是醒着的自己。也不知道这一次，会不会真能如谢舜珲所说，当《绣玉阁》演至京城的时候，便拿得到牌坊。其实，不重要了。令秧此刻才明白，她真正想要的，也许不是那个标志贞节的至高荣耀；她想要的，无非是“传奇”而已。 那缕青烟缱绻地飘到了田野的另一头。满心的柔情让令秧屏住了呼吸。她看到了一条碧绿妩媚的江水。她这才想起，其实她从小是在这条江边长大的，但是她一生去过的最远的地方，也没能让她抵达这条江边。只有在魂飞魄散之前，她才能好好看看它。 那便是新安江。