Chapter 31 Chapter Thirty

"Did you know? Zhang Min's brain is sick." At noon in the second day of junior high school, the girl sitting on the right suddenly covered her mouth with her left hand, her eyes rolled around, and she said such a sentence inexplicably. Ye Zhanyan raised her head and was stunned. After a while, she swallowed the scrambled egg with tomato stuffed in her mouth. "What's the meaning?" "Why are you always so slow?!" Ye Zhanyan lowered his head and did not argue.She has long been used to it.This girl is my friend—in fact, Ye Zhanyan doesn’t know what a friend is. Anyway, this girl was his deskmate when he transferred to another school. She pointed out the location of the women’s toilet and called him every time he went to the toilet. She was the one who introduced the names of most of the students in the class to her, but incidentally explained their gossip and embarrassment after their names, and she was the one who ate together at noon.It was her, it was her, it was she who "saved" the withdrawn and dull transfer student Ye Zhanyan.

Ye Zhanyan doesn't like her. People like her are just the majority of girls in every class. She doesn't have much brains, follows the trend, is a little vicious but not too outrageous, has no personality and gossips. However, he is self-proclaimed and lofty in his heart, and he is not willing to be out of the crowd, so he "humanizes" the people around him, such as Ye Zhanyan. Ye Zhanyan, you are so dumb, Ye Zhanyan, you can’t even do this kind of question, Ye Zhanyan, why are you always so dawdling?Ye Zhanyan, you don't even know who Stefanie Sun is? But others say that she is their good friend, because more often she will say, Ye Zhanyan, I will go to the toilet, will you go?Ye Zhanyan, I'm here, do you have a sanitary napkin?Ye Zhanyan, did you watch the music festival awards ceremony last night?Ye Zhanyan, did you forget to bring your shoe covers again? Computer class again today...

The biggest crisis of their friendship came when Ye Zhanyan put on the light blue dress that her father's colleague gave her instead of school uniform, and she didn't use that tacky little red star hairpin to pin her bangs to the side like a silly girl , but let them lie on the forehead casually - so the boy in the front row who looks like a hippopotamus and likes to bicker with Ye Zhanyan's deskmate looked at her unnaturally when he turned around to borrow an eraser . These two eyes made the sensitive tablemate very upset, and there was a little more contempt in the eyes of "you just like to show off" when looking at Ye Zhanyan.In the afternoon, Ye Zhanyan put her hair back on again, and Hippo boldly asked her, your hair looks better with loose hair—Ye Zhanyan glanced at the tablemate in confusion, and said, "No, no, no, it's better to wear it, it's better to wear it."

The aesthetics of junior high school students is nothing more than that. With dull eyes, girls who dare to loosen their long hair, girls who dare to take off their school uniforms when the class teacher is not around, girls who dare to hang a lot of plush toys on the outside of their schoolbags Girls, the first girls who dare to paint their nails... Such girls are beauties. As for the figure, as for the appearance, none of these overwhelming external conditions attract people's attention. So Ye Zhanyan was not a beauty at that time. No one will seriously look at whether her smooth forehead and long slightly curled eyelashes show signs of a potential beauty.

When Ye Zhanyan was distracted, she noticed that the eyes of her deskmate were already impatient, and she quickly asked in a flattering way: "I really don't understand, why do you say that she has... sickness in her brain? Zhang Min's grades are so good, she always comes first in the exam .” "This thing has nothing to do with whether you are smart or not, okay? Today we went to the language office to check our grades, and it happened that her mother was talking to the teacher. They stopped talking when we were in the house, so after we went out I just stayed at the door and listened for a while, and guess what?"

It was only then that Ye Zhanyan realized that the same table and a few girls had been passing notes during class, and also seized all the time after class to chirp with others excitedly, wondering what they were gossiping about—it turned out to be this. Not wanting to spoil the interest of her tablemate, she pretended to want to know and asked: "What's the matter, could it be that Zhang Min's mother said she was mentally ill?" "That's why you're mentally ill, okay? Whose mother would say that about her daughter?" The corner of the tablemate's mouth twitched, and Ye Zhanyan was suddenly a little angry—indeed, no mother would say that about her daughter.

Only you wicked eighth wives would say that. "What is that for?" "Her mother complained to the teacher, saying that Zhang Min's father could no longer stay at home, and the neighbors couldn't stand the disturbance, and always ran to the street..." The deskmate suddenly looked at him seriously. He glanced around, then lowered his voice and said, "I didn't even have any clothes on, so I ran to the street! My family finally found and tied me back. I was just sent to a mental hospital a few days ago, otherwise Zhang Min would have died." She is about to be beaten to death—her father is a madman Wu, who beats anyone caught at home. Her mother said that she is a nurse and always has to work night shifts. Min is promising and can be admitted to Zhenhua."

The tablemate himself was talking happily, and he was in the middle of his excitement. He didn't notice that Ye Zhanyan had stopped eating, and silently closed the lid of the lunch box. "Dad is mentally ill, she is so pitiful. What's the use of good grades?" said the tablemate dryly, and at the same time picked out the coriander in the lunch box with chopsticks and piled it on the lunch box lid. "What does this have to do with Zhang Min's mental illness?" The deskmate turned his head and looked at Ye Zhanyan like a fool: "You idiot! Don't you know that this disease is hereditary? She will go crazy sooner or later!"

Just after the tablemate finished saying this, Ye Zhanyan stood up with a "huh" and said blankly, "I'm going to the bathroom." The tablemate hurriedly took two mouthfuls of rice and said, "Wait a minute, I have to go to the toilet too." Ye Zhanyan walked straight to the door as if he had never heard of it, ignoring the surprised sentence from the deskmate behind him: "Did you take the wrong medicine?" Ye Zhanyan never took medicine. She used to feed her mother medicine, but now she doesn't have to. Last year her mother jumped off the building and died.

At that time, Ye Zhanyan looked out from the high window, stood there watching silently, imagining that the blood was slowly overflowing, overflowing—it could only be imagined.In the story, a river of blood flows from the body of the person who jumped off the building, and fiery red flowers will bloom.However, standing at the height of the fifteenth floor and looking down, I couldn't see anything clearly. But she thought in her heart, there will always be such a day, and as expected, such a day will finally come. It was not she who called the police, but a passerby, one of the onlookers who wrapped up her mother's body layer by layer.

The relief of this woman who fell from the sky surprised passers-by even more than her own daughter. She explained to her former classmates that her mother accidentally fell from upstairs while cleaning the glass.Then it turned into a car accident. She didn't understand what she wanted to cover up, but it was right to cover up - seeing the students whispering, she knew that it was always right to cover up. Later, her father kindly helped her transfer to a new junior high school so far away.This time she never said anything about her mother to anyone. So this time, her mother did not die. They can say that Zhang Min is mentally ill, that mental illness is hereditary, and that they can't even tell the difference between mental illness and neurosis—but no one can say that it is her head. Knowing that Ye Zhanyan found himself so naive.In the small city in the north, the relationship between people was like a cobweb of thousands of threads, which bound her tightly, making her unable to move. After she saw the parent meeting, her father was greeting Zhang Min's mother.Zhang Min's mother's high cheekbones and thin cheeks filled Ye Zhanyan's field of vision. Before her brain could react, her legs went limp all of a sudden. On the day her mother jumped, she never felt so scared and sad. A few years ago, in the poorly ventilated visiting room of the nursing home, she knelt on a chair and looked out from the iron fence into a large room. The opponent's hand had a painful expression on his face, and tears flowed down the deep nasolabial folds. "You don't know how much I paid for this price. I couldn't sleep at all, and my hair fell out in handfuls. You said, why didn't the Buddha save me? I read it a dozen times as you said... ..." The man's bumpy face kept twitching. I don't know if it was because of the drug's effect. Every time he said a word, his neck twisted to the side, which made her shudder. The door opened, and she saw Zhang Min's mother, who was still short-haired at that time, walk in. It turned out that the man was her lover. The things that Ye Zhanyan can't avoid are things that adults don't want to be depressed in their hearts.She watched her father standing gracefully at the door of the classroom, comforting Zhang Min's mother, who had all the sadness on her face, but what came to mind was the disgusting face of her deskmate. It turned out to be her, they knew each other.She's screwed. Ye Zhanyan retreated step by step from the crowd at the door of the classroom, and fled in despair. "I was sick for two days. When I returned to school, I thought the sky was falling, but I found that nothing happened. Zhang Min's mother's big mouth, Zhang Min naturally knew everything. She came to me to complain, and I was scared to hide. From a distance, I turned around and started worrying that she would be angry with me and spread the word about my mother. But she didn't say anything." Luo Zhi suddenly remembered that when the liberal arts class was first established, there were days when the boys were not doing well, and Zhang Min did the work alone. Ye Zhanyan once fought against injustices and brought back a few boys who had run away and played basketball. Perhaps a negligible return. "But why did you specifically tell me this? Jiang Min never told me." Although it is really strange to hear such a past that has nothing to do with her and Sheng Huainan after enduring the aimless chatter for a long time, if it is worried that Jiang Min had a good relationship with her and leaked these , Then why speak it out without reservation at this moment. However, the way Luo Zhi looked at her still felt much softer.What moved her was not the past, but Ye Zhanyan's posture when telling the story, no longer surrounded by a frivolous atmosphere, and her deep voice was like a stream, which somehow washed away the guard in her heart. "You won't pity me, will you?" After she finished telling the past, she began to laugh again. "No." "I didn't tell Sheng Huainan about some things. But I hope you know." "You let me know that these are meaningless," Luo Zhi subconsciously refused, "I can neither enlighten you nor help you do anything." "Don't be so wary of me, are you such a lack of self-confidence?" She paused, and then said calmly, "Actually, Sheng Huainan and I have long been impossible." Luo Zhi heard crackling noises, wondering if it was the static electricity in winter, she stroked her sweater. "I originally chose to study French in Beijing, and then go to France after a year. But after seeing the situation later, I felt that it was better to leave. So I didn't tell him the truth after all." "The truth? You mean the ones just now?" Luo Zhi frowned. "Of course not, what did that have to do with him?" You know it yourself, Luo Zhi sighed inwardly. It turned out that Sheng Huainan underestimated his mother.Her mother had already investigated Ye Zhanyan's family background clearly, not only the mentally ill mother who jumped off the building, but also the father who left the Academy of Fine Arts in a hurry. "I don't like my mother at all. Yes, she gave birth to me, but who wouldn't give birth to a child?" Ye Zhanyan laughed jokingly, "Since I can remember, she has had mental problems. There is still an indelible scar at the waist, which was burned by her." "My dad is also a bastard. He ran away to Beijing and threw me to my grandmother. My mother went crazy every day, and my grandmother scolded people every day. He raised me like a wolf cub that no one wanted." "You said that you were envious of the spotlight behind the crystal. Isn't that right, Luo Zhi? This is the sentence that Ding Shuijing relayed, and I remember it most clearly." "I'm envious, you really look down on me, I can see it." "Everything about me is made by myself. Including me, I also squeezed it out of my father. I used to be unable to do it." Luo Zhi didn't know exactly how she gritted her teeth and became a cheerful girl who was radiant in everyone's eyes, clear as crystal. Ye Zhanyan's junior high school deskmate may have a better say on this. "When I was in the second grade of elementary school, my dad was teaching Chinese painting in an art academy in Beijing. He got together with a female classmate and lied to him that he was widowed. When the news came here, my grandma thought he was going to kill his crazy daughter and granddaughter. Throwing her alone, she was so angry that she went straight to Beijing and messed up everything. The female student dropped out of school with a big belly, and my father resigned from the Academy of Fine Arts in despair." Ye Zhanyan didn't notice Luo Zhi's face suddenly turned gray. "But he stayed in Beijing and got better and better. Indeed, for an artist, what's the point of sleeping with a female student?" "But do you know who that female student is?" Ye Zhanyan suddenly moved closer to Luo Zhi, and Luo Zhi could even see her own face in her pupils, and her heart began to beat violently. "That female classmate is actually Sheng Huainan's little aunt." Ye Zhanyan was very satisfied with Luo Zhi's shocked expression, and the trace of sadness in her smile became stronger and stronger. "Interesting? Huh? Interesting." Not all coincidences make people smile. However, Ye Zhanyan did not give in to Sheng Huainan's mother.She buried this matter in her heart, and sweetened with him seriously and with a smile on her face. Naturally, they broke up and had nothing to do with this matter. "Do you remember, at the class reunion, you told me that you want me not to feel too sad about the separation, that I am free and easy, and Sheng Huainan likes me like that." Ye Zhanyan raised her head slightly, her chin raised It was full of hatred for Luo Zhi. And Luo Zhi finally understood.Sheng Huainan had never understood Ye Zhanyan, so when the two places were separated, he said simply, "Okay," to her nonsense about breaking up with her when the two places were separated. In fact, Sheng Huainan realized it himself. On the plane, he said to himself, Ye Zhanyan's appearance blurred into a piece of contradictory fragments. Luo Zhi had also heard about the reason why Sheng Huainan and Ye Zhanyan broke up. Although she hadn't asked Sheng Huainan personally, she could easily see some clues from the various online logs of her high school classmates—that is, there was no reason. Too immature romance, underestimation of distance, different situations, less and less common topics, like all lovers who die without a problem. Of course, these clues are all hidden in the regrets, regrets, and comments of "disappointed in love" from passers-by, but the parties never spoke about it. "I acted too much in front of him. I swore that I would never be a vulgar girl, so I never did threats of breaking up, jealousy, jealousy, and temptation, at least I never let him In the end, I was vulnerable once, and he thought I was really free and easy." "But why don't you let him know you?" "Why don't you let him know you?" She knew what Ye Zhanyan was talking about, and was choked speechless. "So you went to Beijing to find him because you wanted to tell him about it?" "I want him to know what I bear alone. I said break up, but he didn't even make it up. Do you think I'm reluctant? I really haven't contacted him once, not once." She was as proud as a child waiting for praise from others. "But now I've figured it out, I'm not interested in bearing the burden of humiliation, I really figured it out, I want him to feel bad. Why should I let him go to someone else?" "So frame me just by the way." "Of course, how important do you think you are?" Ye Zhanyan smiled again, "Besides, it's not the first time." "Not the first time?" "When it was over, you all cried miserably. I saw you sitting on the window sill in the corridor with him, and he stared at you for a long time. Somehow, I think it's very annoying to see your virtue , I instigated Ding Shuijing to quarrel with you when I got back to work." It turned out to be about playing volleyball. Ye Zhanyan smiled evilly, as if he didn't feel that he had done anything bad. Luo Zhi didn't care about it, and reminded her not to digress: "So, did you tell him later?" Ye Zhanyan stopped suddenly, took out a pack of cigarettes from the bag, took out one and lit it, took a puff, and then said casually while exhaling smoke rings: "You don't mind?" Luo Zhi could only shake her head, but opened the window on her side. Ye Zhanyan smiled sarcastically. "I didn't say anything. Ding Shuijing told him the story we made up in advance. He asked for some details, and then didn't reply to her again. I pretended that I just found out about it. It's been almost a year, and I finally called him. First call." "He said that he would investigate clearly. He didn't even ask me what the reason for the breakup written in the letter you didn't hand over was what I said. " "So you didn't say anything when you went to Beijing?" "Why don't you understand? Don't pretend to be stupid. With his attitude, what can I do if I go up and say these things? After talking, I can only make myself look like a fool." Ye Zhanyan took a leisurely breath, and slowly exhaled the dense white smoke.The slender smoke was burning little by little between her white fingers, which was so beautiful. "What is there to say?" The wind blew the white smoke from Ye Zhanyan to the unreachable window at the other end of the corridor, "He doesn't know anything about me. The more he likes me like that, the more I act like that." Show him that everyone likes me like that, and over time, I will really be that kind of person." "It's too late to say anything now. What's there to say? What's more, his heart is towards you. What's the meaning of his true intentions to me? Do you think I just want him to uphold justice?" So what is there to say. Uphold justice?Where do you have justice?Luo Zhi frowned. Tears flashed in Ye Zhanyan's eyes, but they did not fall. It might be Sunshine's prank.Luo Zhi saw it in her eyes, but she still didn't say anything sarcastic after all. "Can you give these to Huainan for me? I can't even say it myself." Her voice trembled, and the cigarette ash fell to the ground with a slow motion beauty. "I?" "to you." "No," Luo Zhi shook her head, "If what you said is true, you can tell Sheng Huainan yourself. I can't forgive you for everything you want to say." Ye Zhanyan squinted her eyes to look at her, like a cat whose eyes were dazzled by the midday sun. "Well, promise me, you will never tell him that we met, you can't reveal any word I said to you, I will go and tell him myself, how about it? Promise me. " Luo Zhi thought for a while, then sighed: "Okay." For some reason, she wasn't worried at all that Ye Zhanyan would confide her heart to Sheng Huainan. So Luo Zhi didn't ask her what happened to Faith's meeting that day, and how the lie she and Ding Shuijing made up was finally seen through. It doesn't make sense to know more.Sheng Huainan didn't want her to ask, maybe because he couldn't tell, or maybe he was just saving face for Ye Zhanyan. Sheng Huainan's gentleness. And when Ye Zhanyan stepped on her high heels and walked forcefully away in the corridor, the sun shone on her red coat particularly dazzlingly. She is neither a crystal nor a sun. Luo Zhi didn't know what she was, so she didn't have time to understand. "Ye Zhanyan likes me like a designer bag." Sheng Huainan once said when he was in a hurry. She and Ye Zhanyan may never have a chance to talk about why they like the same boy, and she will never know whether Ye Zhanyan loves Sheng Huainan more than he loves designer bags.But if she loves him like crystals fall in love with sunshine; then he loves her like falling in love with a book with a beautiful cover. But never opened it. The sound of the high heels stopped suddenly, and she saw Ye Zhanyan who had already reached the stairs turned around and looked at her with an expression she didn't know. Maybe he laughed again, Luo Zhi thought to himself.