They said it was unscathed, so I did it out of curiosity and gave it a try, but my self-esteem was still hurt. Pay me back!Pay me back! !Give me back my pride! ! ! I know that Sano will not return my pride.Besides, self-esteem is not something that is rewarded to you by others, but you have to rely on yourself to find it back. Speaking of it, it is always wrong to do that with someone you don't like, no matter what form it is or what kind of curiosity it is out of. Sano is just a guy who doesn't feel anything to me at all.He is neither my good friend, nor has he said that he likes me, he is not even in the same class, nor in the same interest group, and he is not in the same circle when he usually plays, but he is just in the same school. Akihiko Sano, how did I have such a bad thing happen to him?

Is it because of alcohol? It's easy to blame alcohol for everything, but it's not.It's not morally, ethically wrong, it's just, that's not true love at all. Actually, I just did it out of a little curiosity. It's terrible!I vowed to persuade all my friends and classmates not to follow my example.This Akihiko Sano is simply an asshole! Akihiko Sano must have been poisoned by watching that kind of film, so he imitated the actions in those scenes, how abominable! I left Sano Akihiko behind, grabbed my schoolbag, opened the door and escaped from the hotel. I won't go to school tomorrow.But in that case, it seems to be escaping from something, which makes people feel chest tight.

Still go to school.I don't like to escape. That being said, in fact, am I not just escaping?Escape, escape, in order to escape, he and Sano finally fled to a love hotel, and then such a terrible thing with unknown motives happened. Is not it?Cough, I'm the worst big asshole ever. In this world, there are definitely many people who are lovelorn.Many of them must have had that kind of relationship with people they didn't like. I once heard my brother say that most of the income of the video rental store comes from third-level movies.In other words, there are many, many people like Sano who learn about sex through pornography.It's just too scary for these guys to deceive little girls' feelings.

I, too, came very close to this dreadful state.It was close, but it was almost a dire situation.I can't help but pity myself.But no matter how you pity yourself, it is self-inflicted, and there is no cure for it.I thought no one would come to my rescue. So, I can only save myself. How can I save myself?Self-pity must first be left behind. I remember my brother once said: "Self-pity is the most useless thing, because it won't make you any progress forward." At that time, I also echoed: "People who appreciate themselves are similar. For example, the actress Miki Imai always says that she wants to fulfill herself and live for herself. This kind of person can't listen to other people's opinions, and will eventually make her own. Harm yourself. Anyway, people who talk about themselves and keep their mouths shut, no matter who they are, they are not good people."

I have neither met Miki Imai nor talked to Miki Imai, but I am self righteous and express my opinion. I don't want to think about myself anymore now.So what to do? In any case, the body had to be washed first, for it was filthy with unexplained sweat and filth.Go take a shower go take a shower!It takes only 15 minutes to get to Chofu by express train from Shinjuku, but I feel that the time is very long. After finally getting home, I quickly turned on the shower head in the bathroom and started rinsing.After washing it again, I still felt that the stains on my body were not washed away, so I turned on the water heater again, and simply soaked in the bathtub.Suddenly, as if thinking of something, he climbed out of the bathtub, wrapped his body with a towel, ran to his room on the second floor, took out Body Shop brand bath soap, went back to the bathroom, and soaked the green spherical soap in the bathtub.As a result, the entire bathroom was filled with a strong aroma of lavender, which almost choked me out of breath.

I finally finished my shower. I don't usually like baths and the aroma of lavender, but when I'm depressed, I can experience a fashionable and western feeling with it. This is also my latest self-spiritual therapy, which is very effective. At this moment, I seem to have become my favorite Xia Siting again, a high school girl who went to study in the United States from Sweden—— Brother Uller wrote from the countryside from time to time, asking how Shastin was living alone in Boston, and told how hard it was for him to herd sheep in the countryside of Hadbra. When I went to see a crocodile in the zoo, I said, "I have never seen a crocodile when it grows so big."

Xia Siting came to study in the United States from Sweden alone across mountains and rivers, but she was not afraid and lived in her own way.This girl has no inferiority complex from the countryside at all. She not only maintains the simplicity of Hadbra's countryside, but also learns the fashion of Boston's big city. The two temperaments coexist harmoniously in her. Xia Siting is not the kind of person who is particularly competitive, and she has a bright personality, so she is easy to get along with.Her friends are all kinds, both girls and quite a few boys.Everyone saw that she was stable and enthusiastic, so they always asked her for advice on emotional matters.No matter who it is, bumps and bumps will happen in love, and some people like to deal with them by themselves, and whenever this happens, Xia Siting will always give some suggestions enthusiastically.

For me, Aiko Katsura, a high school girl in Tokyo, Japan, Xia Siting also helped me analyze it generously. She said: "Aiko, being with someone you don't like will only aggravate your loneliness and confusion. Unreal feelings, even if they feel warm on the outside, will only make Aiko's heart feel colder. .Pursue unreal feelings, and you will be farther and farther away from the real world.” I said, "Well, no wonder I feel that the world is getting farther and farther away from me." She said: "But Aizi, you don't have to think about it. Your future life path is the real thing, and the so-called distance is just a vague concept, which is illusory and unreliable."

I said: "Life is still very long, distance is just a vague concept?" She said, "Yes, Aiko. If you keep thinking about distance, you might commit suicide by jumping off a building like Noguchi or Hasumi, or you'd kill cats and dogs like a madman insane, or even kill people nearby. The triplets who are less than one year old will also be taken away, and they will be killed by the river and then dismembered." I said, "But I'm not crazy." "Okay, let's not talk about whether you are crazy or not. Hey, does Aiko have someone he likes?" "..."

If the face and name that first popped up in my mind were my favorite person when I was suddenly asked "who do I like", then I think I like Sekiguchi-senpai the most. "Sekiguchi-senpai is just your conditioned reflex. Aiko must have admired Sekiguchi-senpai too much when she was in junior high school." "But Senior Sekiguchi is indeed very handsome." "I don't care whether he is handsome or not. After entering high school, Sekiguchi suddenly stopped practicing kendo and joined the tennis club, but he only knew about dating all day long. He didn't do anything except dating. In the end, he didn't even go to school. I don't know where to go. Where did it go. Isn't this a big fool? You don't think such a person is handsome, do you? He disappoints you? Don't think about it anymore. Who is the person you really like?"

"Liver? Phoenix." "Isn't he already dead? Besides, you don't know Livu at all, but you just have a little affection for him after hearing the story of him being with children." "But who would know the real story of an actor?" "I won't talk about him as an actor. Is there anyone around Aiko that you like?" "Probably Kasami." "But it's only been two months." "Mr. Stone Mountain." "He's only interested in that kind of thing. You guys haven't talked about being friends at all." "Then it's Nakagawa." "I'm surprised you say that, Aiko. You're talking about the past tense. There must be now, right? Who do you like now? Don't keep talking about the past, okay?" "Sagara-kun?" "Oh, Sagara?" "I think I really like Sagara. There are times when I really want to see Sagara." "But, Aiko, did you hesitate when you said Sagara's name? Aiko, if you ask someone you like, you can't hesitate. Anyone who hesitates to say it means that it's not your true love." The person you like. Love is absolutely unquestionable. Don’t think about who likes you. There is only one answer to the person you like. This is a very clear thing. Aiko, in fact, you have liked before Sekiguchi-senpai Kasami-kun, Shishan-kun, Nakagawa-kun, Sano-kun, etc., can’t replace him, can they?” Xia Siting, no more words! Yes, I'm so sorry. In fact, I didn’t feel sorry for anyone, so I’m sorry for myself?It makes everyone impatient, not just myself, it's really boring. To be honest, I like Yoji Kaneda, my classmate in elementary school. I have had a crush on him since the sixth grade of elementary school. He is my first love.I still like him till now.sorry. Heck, it's no use saying sorry. I buried my body deeply in the bathtub and sighed.The bath bubbles in front of me were blown to pieces by me, and dirty water appeared under the broken bubbles.I could see my belly in the tub, my legs, and that secret place. It's unbelievable that my place was violated by that bastard Sano today. Emotions remain low. At this time, Xia Siting appeared again: "Don't be depressed by this matter, Aizi! There are people in life who are more unlucky than you, it's nothing, maybe you may encounter even more unlucky things. " Right, really. Hastings is amazing.She can say what is on my mind. I almost had worse luck.I wouldn't even want to conceive a bastard's child like Sano.If that's the case, I will definitely tell Sano to die, and then raise the child alone.Of course it is inside the high walls, that is, inside the prison. I will probably be sent to the Amazon jungle? I think I will become an "angel in prison", fighting other female prisoners and guards, and raising my children well.But this is the worst possible outcome. I don't want to go to prison, I don't want to be an angel in prison, and I don't want to raise my precious child in that kind of place. I should really be glad that I didn't encounter such unfortunate things. In this world, how many people have encountered all kinds of unlucky things. I must not be the only stupid girl who has that kind of thing with a boy she doesn't like, and there are many more than I imagined.Among them, there are quite a few who have been defiled on their faces, mouths, and bodies, or who have become "angels in prison".Oh, "Angels in Prison" maybe not.Anyway, I was just unlucky enough, but not the worst. I'm fine. If you think about it this way, it may be unfair to those "angels in prison". I will definitely reflect on myself and never do that kind of thing with someone I don't like again.I want to like someone worthy of my liking, and I want to find someone else who really likes me. After introspecting countless times, the new person I really like still doesn't appear.Even then, I wouldn't have anything to do with a guy I had no feelings for.One cannot live in reflection all the time.Really, I will never make the same mistake again. "Ah... If Yoji wants me to do it..." As I thought about it, I couldn't help but say it softly.The subconscious voice echoed in the bathroom.I was so ashamed that I buried myself in the water up to my shoulders, my face in the bubbles. "Ah, I really want to talk to Yang Zhi..." These words were stuck in the bubble.