Chapter 5 1998 Summer Solstice · Warm Fog · Breaking Time

Time reverses into a red morning mist, day and night gradually equalize I started my lonely years in the world you have long forgotten, with my eyes closed and my ears covered cheering with tears Not seeing you means not seeing the whole world The darkness engulfed tens of billions of planets like a tide.Large areas of sunflowers withered.Migratory birds flocked to the funeral. One heavy voyage after another without seeing the way. Who waved his hand blankly, and then cut off the world What is silent is your reluctance.And your pale profile. The world never wakes up, it sleeps quietly under your shirt collar

The white horse is too late.The beard instantly pierced the skin of the lips.Youth is flying the banner to hunt and catch the wind. So you've grown up and become a king with a crown on your head But I was at a loss to think that you were still a pale little prince They say that as long as there is a little prince in the world, there will always be the fox who has been waiting for love When swallows rush back with green in their mouths in the coming year Are you still bowing your head under the camphor like in the summer when you were 17 then meet me In that long, psychedelic, never-ending summer.

At first, Fu Xiaosi didn't know that the days were so long. Every morning, he opened his eyes in the sun, and then walked towards the writing desk with his messy hair and flip-flops, and picked up a pen to cross out another day on the desk calendar. brush teeth.wash your face.Looking at the messy long hair in the mirror, I suddenly remembered that the summer vacation has passed for almost a month.Summer is always summer, and the temperature is astonishingly high. Even a city with such a high latitude as Asakawa still feels that the white light glowing from the concrete floor is enough to kill everyone's thoughts of going out.Watermelons are piled up in piles by the roadside to form a green ocean, and the occasional sound of flies stirring up restlessness in the air is annoying.Li Yanran still comes over to play every two days. He said it was just watching TV in the living room, because Xiao Si didn’t know how to play with girls at all. The things he likes to play are puzzles, reading books, listening to CDs, playing video games, etc. Wait, it should be boring and outdated in the eyes of girls, right?Xiao Si thought a little annoyed, after all, Lu Zhiang is more popular with girls, and he can't finish the conversation, unlike himself, after "Hey, I'm here", "Would you like to eat watermelon?" So I went to the bedroom alone to do puzzles.Fortunately, Li Yanran was used to such a low-key person, reticent and distracted, so the two of them didn't feel bored when they stayed at home quietly, and even showed a little warmth with some tacit understanding.Yan Ran is not annoying, this makes Xiao Si feel very good.Many girls chattered endlessly whenever they discussed something, and Fu Xiaosi felt a severe headache every time and couldn't do anything about them.For example, Lixia and Qiqi both seem to be very quiet, and they talk more than their mother.

A whole summer is still normal, there is nothing wrong with it.There are still many young boys and girls going swimming in groups, the bright sunlight reflected in a large swimming pool, young smiles and bubbling Coke with ice, how many young loves have been produced in midsummer.The air conditioner in the whole city is still fully turned on, and the movie theater can even make people catch a cold.The real estate uncle in the community still smiles brightly every day.All time passed silently.But what is it?Let this hot and incandescent summer vacation become slow and lengthy, with drowsy heat, crawling heavily from the eyelids.

weird idea.Can't figure it out.Fu Xiaosi waved his hand, trying to disperse the steaming steam in his mind as if trying to drive away mosquitoes.Later, when I opened the closet to look for clothes, I saw the white shirt that Lu Zhiang left at home because of the rain last time, and then I remembered it. It turned out that Lu Zhiang hadn't contacted me for a month.Fu Xiaosi thought of this the moment he opened the closet, so he opened his mouth slightly and made an expression of "ah" silently. Changed into a short-sleeved T-shirt and went out, rode a bicycle and drove out the door, followed by a downhill, then turned left, turned left,

Passing by a few street corners with mottled walls, several wanted notices on the walls have been posted for several months and there is still no movement.The camphor trees on the side of the road covered Fu Xiaosi's back with the shade as thick as splashed ink in summer, flickering brightly and darkly. Fu Xiaosi rode to the gate of Lu Zhiang's house, before he stopped the car, he saw Lu Zhiang pushing the bicycle out, he turned his head and saw Fu Xiaosi who was sitting on the bicycle beside the door, his expression was Then all kinds of weak and strong changes occurred on his face in an instant, but finally he returned to calm, opened his mouth and didn't speak for a long time, and finally said, what are you doing here?

What am I doing here.Xiao Si thought to himself, it really sounded like his usual tone of speech, and he was as expressionless as himself. Nothing, passing here.Just come to see you, have you been locked at home this month to build an atomic bomb?Fu Xiaosi angrily rang the bicycle bell back and forth, then looked up at Lu Zhiang in front of him.I don't know when this guy is half a head taller than him, and his teeth itch with hatred. Nothing...don't really want to come out at home. that's it? Well, that's it... Well then I'll go back first. In fact, Fu Xiaosi was a little angry.Because no matter what, it can be seen that Lu Zhiang has something on his mind, but he doesn't want to tell him.It seems that this kind of situation has never happened since childhood. The normal situation should be that Lu Zhiang blah blah blah blah blah blah, blah blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. How many CDs and which books did I buy in total in one month? If there is a slight setback in life, I will complain repeatedly with a mournful face.In general, Xiao Si just ignores him, looks around blankly, and occasionally sees him talking too excitedly, so he will "ah", "really?"And now...

The fire in my heart didn't come out, so I rode my bike desperately.The camphor is blurred into pieces of elongated green with furry edges, whizzing back from the side.Because he was so full of thoughts about the spectacular scene of beating that kid up and stepping on the ground to relieve his hatred, but he didn't notice that he almost bumped into someone when he turned the corner. Fu Xiaosi braked the car in embarrassment, then raised his head and saw a familiar face, which was almost exactly the same as the expressionless face he had seen just a few minutes ago. Ah, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it... Hey... Uncle Lu, why are you here?

The air in summer always makes people feel stuffy and suffocating.Fu Xiaosi has also been thinking about how to understand what Lu Zhiang's father said just now, "His mother is in Senchuan Hospital... terminal cancer".Fu Xiaosi even felt that after a long hibernation, he got up lazily, feeling powerless, and seemed to feel that there was still heavy snow outside the window, but when he opened his eyes, he would already be in a rage. There was a burning pain all over my body.Like something is burning from the skin.Fu Xiaosi thought about Lu Zhiang's expression as he passed in front of him just now.With a deadpan face and the back view of him riding away, the white shirt is like a windless banner.It must be very sad.But Lu Zhiang still looks very strong.Xiao Si felt faintly sad, he suddenly felt very sad, because he was afraid that Lu Zhiang would never show his teeth and laugh like before.Thinking of this, he panicked a little, so he said goodbye to Lu Zhiang's father, then turned around and rode towards Senchuan Hospital.

The world is silent, as quiet as water.It started when Lu Zhiang walked out of the gate of Senchuan Hospital with a metal insulated lunch box.He raised his head and saw Fu Xiaosi sitting on the side of the road at the gate of Senchuan Hospital, feeling a little sad in his heart.But so many words were stuck in his throat, and in the end, he only said "Do you want to go back? Together...". "Next semester, we will be divided into arts and sciences, have you thought about it?" ——Zhiang, will you separate from me? "I don't know, I haven't seriously thought about it yet, Xiao Si, you should study literature."

"En. There is an exhibition of Yan Bo's paintings at the Asakawa Art Museum this weekend, will you accompany me?" ——Go to any place to relax, let me accompany you, it will be very sad when you are alone. "...Xiao Si, you can go by yourself, I'm a little tired recently." "I met a very beautiful girl that day, but she was very proud. I will introduce you next time and see if you can handle it." ——Zhiang, you must be the same as before, you must laugh, you must be good at making girls happy, you must be happy, and don’t frown frequently like me, which is not good-looking. Fu Xiaosi was waiting for Lu Zhiang's answer, and by the way, he was racking his brains to think about the next question, even if it was just a casual chat, but it seemed difficult, and he couldn't remember how Lu Zhiang comforted him when he put on a bad face my own.Just as I was thinking about a bad question like "Let's go get my hair cut together", I just turned my head away, and then the world fell silent for a moment. Lu Zhiang was sitting in the middle of the road, his legs were too long and innocently bent and stretched in front of him, the setting sun was sinking from his back, and there was a layer of furry light on his back.There were no vehicles or pedestrians, only the tall camphor trees on both sides of the road exuded the strong smell of leaves.His head was lowered, his hair covered his clear eyebrows and eyes, but he could still see a drop of water suddenly smashed on the white concrete road.Fu Xiaosi's heart suddenly felt pain after fit, because in the crashing sound of the overlapping camphor leaves, in the rustling of the treetops like the sea tide, in thousands of clear or indistinct sounds Here, he heard Lu Zhiang's words that were so light that there was almost no trace, and he said slowly with a crying voice: "Xiao Si, in fact, I have seriously thought about how sad the road ahead will be." In the following time, Fu Xiaosi went to Lu Zhiang's house by bike every morning, and then went to the hospital with him.In the past, when he went to school, he would go downstairs to call him, but now it was reversed. Every morning, Fu Xiaosi even got up earlier than when he was in school, hurriedly brushed his teeth and washed his face, then quickly raised his throat to drink milk, and then grabbed As soon as he picked up the bread, he rushed downstairs.When biting bread on the road, the index finger and middle finger of the hand holding the faucet will fold together to pray, God please bless Zhiang with a happy mood today. There was always not much talking on the road, the sunlight swayed from the branches and leaves of the camphor and sprinkled on the two boys.In the second year of high school, he suddenly turned into a 17-year-old boy, his body gradually became slender and thin, and his muscles showed lines.The shoulder blades on the back are clearly outlined in the white shirt.But in the hospital, because of brain cancer, Lu Zhiang's mother had an operation on the head and a lot of stitches, plus chemotherapy, all her hair fell out.His mother was in a deep sleep most of the time, occasionally Lu Zhiang would bend over immediately when she woke up, and then she closed her eyes and fell asleep again.Fu Xiaosi didn't know what he should do. He spent most of his time reading on the bed next to him, and occasionally drew some patterns on the white paper.As for Lu Zhiang, his legs were curled up on the chair, his eyes were red and he was in a daze.Occasionally, Xiao Si would peel an apple and give him half of it. The days just passed away one by one, with the unique tranquility before death, huge and powerless.The world suddenly turned into a splendid fruit, but there was a worm in the core that was slowly nibbling away, bit by bit the empty core and flesh, gradually approaching the peel.Before the sharp bite that breaks through the peel, the world is still bright and shiny, only the rustling sound of gnawing slowly spreads out from the center of the world bit by bit. Every day, Xiao Si and Zhi Ang went back and forth on the concrete road with few passers-by, silent in the rising sun, and bowed their heads sadly in the setting sun.The carving knife of time is merciless, and Zhiyang's chin is already surrounded by blue stubble that is unique to teenagers.During the many evenings when he went home, Xiao Si was thinking, have we grown up like this? 17, 18, 19, growing past toward a long future.Then time stopped for an instant. It was a dusk when the sun was setting and the sky was full. Xiao Si and Zhi Ang raised their heads at the same time, and heard the long sound of the waveform returning to a straight line from the electrocardiograph. After Lixia got up, he crossed out another day on the calendar, and there were still seventeen days left for school to start.Li Xia also felt a little strange that the days passed so long.Sometimes I would go to Qiqi's house to chat with her, and I would talk about many things about Asakawa No. 1 Middle School. When chatting, I would always talk about Fu Xiaosi and Lu Zhiang, two students in Asakawa No. 1 Middle School that all the teachers in the school regard as treasures.There are many things to talk about, such as Lu Zhiang's never-changing blue backpack, Fu Xiaosi's usual white shirt, the coke that both of them love to drink, Lu Zhiang's lawless laughing up to the sky, and the perennial fog in Fu Xiaosi's eyes , the two desks in the classroom with patterned patterns, and the long black windbreaker in winter, when the year is about to pass, Li Xia recalled them all clearly in her heart. She thought, these two guys should become The legend of Asakawa No. 1 Middle School now and in the future. And every time Lixia talks about it, she feels a little sad in her heart.If I had known earlier, I wouldn't have left a call to the two of them, which made me so depressed now.I don't know what those two people are busy with. Many times when Li Xia accidentally sees the quiet phone at home, he will think, what is Xiao Si doing now, is he still frowning and drawing?And Lu Zhiang is still sleeping with his head covered next to him? And these things about Asakawa No. 1 Middle School can only be discussed with Qiqi, because in a small town like Muro County, those who can be admitted to Asakawa No. 1 Middle School People are as rare as students from other cities who have been admitted to the best universities.Li Xia was very careful not to mention Asakawa No. 1 Middle School when meeting with his junior high school classmates, let alone mentioning that he was in the top ten in school, otherwise there would always be people with red eyes and sour words.Li Xia is most afraid of these.But privately, I can also be a little angry.Who is to blame for not working hard at the beginning? I used to stay up late at night when you were sleeping in pain, but now I am jealous that I can go to the best middle school in the province.absurd. Lixia has been thinking about the division of arts and sciences throughout the summer vacation. Qiqi is a student of literature, so don't ask, but Lixia has two other people in his mind besides himself.Uneasy, even walking back and forth at home when thinking about this issue, just like an old man.And that day I called Xiao Si to ask about this matter, but in the end I heard about Lu Zhiang's mother. Li Xia clearly remembered that when he heard that sentence, the microphone in his hand dropped to the floor with a bang, and when he picked it up again it was already disconnected, but he didn't have the courage to call again.Li Xia turned her head to look at her mother who was busy in the kitchen, the setting sun was hitting her hair, her hair was slightly gray, and her back was arched with a slightly sour curve.Li Xia felt unstoppable sadness in his heart, and the circles of his eyes turned red in an instant. The entire courtyard was crowded with people coming and going, and the summer heat sank and accumulated near the surface, making the entire courtyard extremely hot, and countless white wreaths were placed outside the door.White chrysanthemums are scattered in every corner in piles.When Fu Xiaosi and his parents came, there were already crowds of people all around, with expressionless faces or whispering.Occasionally, he could hear something like "too poor, such a small child" clearly, and Fu Xiaosi frowned slightly. Uncle Lu has been busy greeting those who came to the funeral, he looks haggard, his eyes sunken deeply.It must have been several days without sleep.Xiao Si and Uncle Lu started to look for Lu Zhiang after saying hello, but they couldn't find him. There were a lot of people crowded around. After all, Lu's family is a well-known figure in Asakawa, so there are a lot of people here.While frowning, Xiao Si kept saying "Excuse me, excuse me" in a low voice while loosening the collar of his shirt. It was too hot, and his chest was sweating all the time.This black shirt was just bought by my mother, because I have never had all black clothes in my closet. Later, after those spiritual masters beating gongs and drums made a fuss, Fu Xiaosi saw Lu Zhiang sitting in the corner.A mess of hair and an unshaven lip, but he was still wearing a white shirt.Fu Xiaosi suddenly felt pain in his eyes, he thought in a trance, maybe the people around him were all black, in the whole black world, only Lu Zhiang showed pure white, that's why he felt the glare.And this weak and powerless white, in the entire dark and boundless world, is like a group of innocent and soft white catkins.Just as Fu Xiaosi was about to open his mouth to call him, the phone rang suddenly. Xiao Si took out his mobile phone from his pocket, and saw that it was Li Xia.Just after finishing two sentences, it was cut off abruptly.After hanging up the phone, Fu Xiaosi looked over to Lu Zhiang, just in time to meet Lu Zhiang's raised gaze. Lu Zhiang raised his head when he heard the same phone ringtone as himself, he knew it was Fu Xiaosi.Standing in front of him was Xiao Si, dressed in black, standing in the gradually darkening twilight, his eyes shining like a compassionate priest, and except for his bright eyes, his whole body seemed to melt into the night behind him Same here.Lu Zhiang's chest was a little tight, he was breathing In the gap of inhalation, I feel that the whole world is extremely turbulent like the moment before the torrential water bursts the embankment.This kind of emotion even made it too late for him to think about why Fu Xiaosi's eyes that were always blurred would become clear and bright like the brilliant North Star again. I will never forget the look Lu Zhiang looked at me when he raised his head that day. In the sound of drums and gongs from the spiritual master, Lu Zhiang's big hot tears rolled down his face.I can see that he wants to control his emotions, but the corners of his mouth still look very much like the expression he pulled down when he was bullied as a child.I remember seeing him cry almost every day when I was in kindergarten, because of my aunt’s scolding, for the candy that I couldn’t get, for fighting me on the carousel, for peeing my pants, and because I gave the glass beads to a beautiful girl. Give him... And when he grows up, Zhiang will always have a bright smile like the sun, a lively face when talking, a bright smiling face when he is happy, and when he is sad... When there is no sadness, he After I grew up, I never had a sad moment in front of me again. I thought I had forgotten his sad face, but when I saw his sad face again after such a long time, the shock was suddenly magnified ten times. Instantly turned me into an empty shell, like a broken flag hanging in the wind. In the thick night, among the noisy crowd around him, he is like a pure white and quiet sad shepherd boy.I really want to go over and help him straighten his long hair that is messy in the wind, and I also really want to sit down with him on the hot ground as if nothing had happened and say to him, well, let's go cut his hair someday.But a huge root system grew under my feet and pinned me to the ground, unable to move.Because I was afraid that if I walked over, he would see the messy tears on my face.I don't want him to see me cry, because I never cried in front of him again when I grew up. Lu Zhiang, mother will definitely go to heaven.You have to believe me. ——1996 Fu Xiaosi On the day of Lu Zhiang's mother's funeral, Lu Zhiang didn't say a word, he watched everything going on slowly like a silent movie, and the only thing he could know was that Fu Xiaosi stood beside him also silent.In the past, he always didn't understand why Xiao Si could talk so little, but now, he found that he could do it easily. The bodies were put into the incinerator.Mom's face disappeared into the narrow steel space.He remembered that when he was 5 years old, his mother could have left Asakawa to go to a big city for further studies, and when she came back half a year later, she could become a senior executive of the bank.And that day at the train station, Lu Zhiang watched his mother step onto the train, and suddenly burst into tears, and one minute before the train started, his mother ran off the train.And when Lu Zhiang grew up, she realized that the decision her mother made at the beginning was actually giving up her own life. She chose her mother and gave up her own career as a woman. ——Mom, I will never cry again, and I will never let you give up anything for me.You are free to live your own life. The flames were faintly red, and the heat increased in an instant.Lu Zhiang felt his eye sockets swell, he remembered the thing that he almost died of illness, it was when he was 10 years old, he had a sudden high fever, couldn't get a car at night, and it was pouring rain, his father was away on a business trip, so his mother hugged him alone It took almost three hours to get to the hospital.At that time his family did not live in the city Heart, the mountain road is full of mud, and my mother can't change hands while holding him. The two hands are almost exhausted, so they hold each other tightly and don't let go.Later, the doctor said that if the child arrived at the hospital a few hours late, it would not be possible to save the child.Zhiang remembered that his mother was crying loudly in the hospital, and he could feel her sadness even in his coma. ——Mom, I will never play outside all day and don’t know how to go home. I will never let you sit and wait for me in the living room. Mom, I will never go out to have fun with girls I forgot your birthday, mom, I will never cheat and force you to say that my paintings are better than Fu Xiaosi, mom, I will never say that your dishes are not delicious, mom, I will never Cry and make a fuss when sick. Black dust began to fly out of the chimney, and the tall chimney looked particularly bleak in the twilight.When Fu Xiaosi raised his head, it suddenly occurred to him that this dusty entrance and exit had taken away the sadness and longing of many people.In the evening sky, a flock of black birds flew silently.Zhiang remembered that a girl who liked him once went to his house, and his mother was very happy, because she was always worried that he would not find a wife for such a carefree personality.Mom was happy and even nervous to see the girl and a little overwhelmed.That day his mother chatted with them all the time, and Lu Zhiang knew that his mother was very happy.But the girl whispered in his ear, "Why isn't your mother leaving? I want to chat with you alone."Just because of this sentence he kicked the girl out.His mother scolded him for his bad temper.He didn't talk back at that time, thinking in his heart, he will definitely find the best wife in the world in the future to let her know that I am also a very good boy.But he didn't expect such a short time to do so many things... ——Mom, I will never get my clothes dirty again every day. Mom, I will never forget that you like red and buy the wrong green clothes for you. Mom, I will never give you to me again. The gift is left somewhere in the room under the excuse of not liking it, mom I will never forget your birthday again, mom... I will never cry again, mom I will be the best CPA ...Mom, you must go to the kingdom of heaven, and I will come when I die in the future. Don’t worry, I will definitely come to the kingdom of heaven, because you told me to be a strong and kind person.God will love me for sure, Mom...bye. Fu Xiaosi raised his head, the sky was so gray that he couldn't see clearly.He thought, this summer is finally coming to an end.There will never be a summer like this again. When Fu Xiaosi dragged Zeus home, many inexplicable emotions arose in his heart, and he couldn't even tell whether it was panic, anger, or deep sadness.It's just that when he thought that Lu Zhiang's mood had gradually improved, in fact everything was only getting worse.Standing in the courtyard of Lu Zhiang's house, he could only see Zeus squatting dirty beside the doghouse with an innocent expression on his face, and when he saw Fu Xiaosi walking into the courtyard, he would bark in a low voice. Like Lu Zhiang, Lu Zhiang's father is still in a sad mood.It's just that Lu Zhiang is more serious.Fu Xiaosi only found out after chatting with Uncle Lu that after his mother was buried, he hardly ever went home.Most of the time, he came back from outside in the early morning with a relaxed appearance, smelled of alcohol, and had red eyes. ——When I slapped him, he didn't make a sound, and the tears in his eyes didn't fall down.I can also hear his gritting his teeth patiently.I know my son better than anyone.Usually seems very easy-going appearance, in fact, personality is more Everyone is stubborn. When Fu Xiaosi said goodbye, he looked at the poor Zeus in the yard, and said, I will take Zeus home to raise him for a while, and no one here is in the mood to take care of him now. Fu Xiaosi tied Zeus to the railing at the entrance of the hypermarket, and then went in to buy dog ​​food.When I came out, I saw Zeus squatting on the side of the road in the twilight and watching the rushing cars. Many people around me cast curious glances at Zeus. How could such a big and beautiful shepherd dog be tied to the road so sloppily? side?Zeus lay on the ground intently, staring at the distance of the road, waiting quietly, while Fu Xiaosi looked at Zeus's back and suddenly felt sad for unknown reasons. On the way home, Fu Xiaosi remembered many things from the past.At that time, Zeus was still a very small dog. Zeus almost grew up with the two of them. From being so weak, he now stands taller than Xiao Si.Those past years all came back again, he and Lu Zhiang took Zeus to climb the mountains together, and dragged Zeus to swim in the river, bought all kinds of dog food, and changed three dog houses of different sizes , the last dog house was hammered out by him and Zhiang with wooden blocks and nails.Those past events surged from the depths of my heart to the top of my throat.Fu Xiaosi suddenly stopped and patted Zeus' head. Zeus obediently raised his head and licked Xiao Si's palm with his wet tongue, and then Xiao Si burst into tears.The noisy road in the twilight silently absorbed Fu Xiaosi's tears, and the hot ground accommodated his sorrow and quickly descended towards the depths of the earth.Xiao Si knelt down and hugged Zeus, then wiped away his tears, he thought, cry one last time, and never cry again. When Xiao Si stood up and was about to go home, Zeus suddenly called out loudly. Among the domineering boys in front, the most obvious one was a tall, thin man in a white shirt with an expressionless face, holding a beer bottle in his hand.The moment he saw Fu Xiaosi, the hand holding the wine bottle tightened suddenly, the knuckles turned white, and the slender knuckles could even be heard cracking. Fu Xiaosi's eyes were more unfocused than ever, with a cold expression on his face.He pulled the excited Zeus to stand motionless, and then said word by word, Lu Zhiang, when are you going to make trouble! Fu Xiaosi was very angry when he saw a group of rascals standing in front of him.Fu Xiaosi also knew some of them, because he was a problem student who was expelled when he was studying in the junior high school of Asakawa No. 1 Middle School.The person who hooked Lu Zhiang's shoulder was Wu Yue, and almost everyone hated him when he was in school. ——Have you been with this kind of...people these days? Originally, he wanted to say "this kind of bastard", but Fu Xiaosi still maintained some rationality.Because during this time, he didn't want to get angry with Lu Zhiang either. Lu Zhiang didn't speak, just sat down on the railing by the side of the road with his head down, holding the bottle in his hand and knocking unconsciously on the railing Rod, his hair hangs in front of his face, and there is no expression on his face. But Wu Yue came over and grabbed Fu Xiaosi's chin as soon as he raised his hand, "Speak clearly to me, what is this kind of person, what kind of person?! I know you are Fu Xiaosi, Fu Xiaosi is amazing! ?” Before Fu Xiaosi could react, he heard the muffled sound of bones hitting bones, and then a figure from behind flashed in front of him, Lu Zhiang punched Wu Yue's face forcefully, causing Wu Yue to wow in pain While barking, Lu Zhiang knocked the beer bottle on the railing, then pointed the sharp shards of the bottle at those who opened their mouths because of surprise, and said, I am in a bad mood, anyone who wants to fight, come here . Lu Zhiang looked at Fu Xiaosi silently looking for various medicines and items for wound treatment in the room, back and forth on the floor with his bare feet, seeing the bruise on his chin near the ear Feel distressed for a while.He gritted his teeth and cursed in his heart, Wu Yue's force is really ruthless.Although I have often fought with Xiao Si since I was a child, and even rolled all over the floor, I still can't bear others to fight against Xiao Si.So when he saw Wu Yue pinching Xiao Si's chin today, Lu Zhiang's heart instantly became furious.But now, although there are many things I want to say, I don't know how to speak, and I just asked vaguely "Does it hurt?" ——Of course it hurts you so fucking let me pinch it and try. Sure enough, there was no good voice.This is also what Lu Zhiang expected.However, Xiao Si can still lose his temper at himself, which proves that he is not too angry.Growing up with Dalu Zhiang since he was a child, he knows his temper. If he is really angry, he will never say a word to you.So Lu Zhiang felt less guilty. ——But having said that, you are really good at fighting. Fortunately, you have me, otherwise you would not only have a black chin. —I'm holding your dog by the hand!You pull a dog to fight and try! ——… Fu Xiaosi didn't stop because Lu Zhiang was speechless, he continued to squint at him and said, and!You don't even look at who gets the most prizes!After finishing speaking, he threw a lot of things such as cotton gauze, alcohol, iodine, hydrogen peroxide, Band-Aid, Yunnan Baiyao, etc., at him.Then he fell on the sofa and rubbed his chin, thinking in his heart, mother's Wu Yue, this bastard is so strong! Lu Zhiang spread his hands and made a helpless expression of "OK, you won", and then began to wash the wound with cotton dipped in alcohol.Seeing his clumsy appearance, Fu Xiaosi could only sigh and got up to help him clean the wound. Pushing away his hair, he saw a deep gash on his head. Fu Xiaosi didn't dare to use any force while holding the alcohol cotton ball. The red flesh and coagulated blood made Xiao Si feel uncomfortable, because he knew that the gash was Because Lu Zhiang ran over to help him block the smashed wine bottle, his throat was a little choked, especially when Lu Zhiang was shaking involuntarily.Xiao Si knew that it was because the alcohol touched the wound. ——Just scream when it hurts, and pretend to be a fart in front of me. The tone was calm without waves, concealing the distress in it. ——I was afraid that my dad would hear it. If there was no one at home, I would have been called Fantian... Take it easy! Fu Xiaosi threw the cotton aside, looked at Lu Zhiang and said, you also know that you are afraid that your father will hear.What the hell are you thinking, hanging out with people like that. Lu Zhiang lowered his head and didn't say much, because since he grew up, he didn't dare to talk back to Xiao Si. He couldn't explain why, but felt that Xiao Si was usually too dignified.If it was in normal times, he would definitely have a hippie smiling face, but now, because of his heavy heart, he just kept silent and didn't speak. Fu Xiaosi turned around and walked out of the room, brought a glass of water in when he came back, he looked at the silent Lu Zhiang and felt sad, but also a little angry.Especially when seeing him mixing with people like Wu Yue.He handed the water to Lu Zhiang, and said, if you give up on yourself like this, your mother will hate you to death... As soon as Lu Zhiang heard the word "Mom", he waved his hand, "Don't mention my mother!", but with a wave of his hand, he just hit the boiled water that Xiao Si handed over, and when he looked up, he saw the whole glass of water flowing from Fu Xiao Splashed down on Secretary's shoulder.Lu Zhiang stood up at a loss, because his hands touched a little water, and just a little bit was very hot.He looked at Fu Xiaosi's expressionless face and suddenly panicked. Fu Xiaosi didn't say anything, even though his shoulder was so hot that he almost cried out.Just for a moment, there was some sadness in my heart.The boy's feelings should be so forbearing, no matter how much pain he endures without any expression, he can bear all the sharp corners and sharp blades with a calm side face. That night Fu Xiaosi stayed at Lu Zhiang's house, he lay on the bed in the guest room and couldn't sleep, Lu Zhiang's sad face was still appearing in front of his eyes repeatedly. The pain in the shoulder haunts the nerves from time to time, and the touch of the hand feels like a hot burn. "This idiot".It seems that they can only curse "this idiot". When Fu Xiaosi woke up the next morning and opened his eyes, he saw the ointment for burns on the side of the pillow.At that moment, he felt that something was blocked in his throat.He could imagine that Lu Zhiang would come in quietly at night to put down the ointment, or he would look at himself sleeping soundly with guilty eyes.Then sit on the floor and say something to your sleeping self that you can't usually say, or cry weakly.Then quietly close the door and leave. Fu Xiaosi went to the balcony and opened the curtains to look out. The sun was shining brightly, with the scorching brightness unique to summer. Under the sun, Lu Zhiang was helping Zeus take a shower with the faucet.His face was full of smiles again, although not as bright as before, but he looked extraordinarily calm, and Zeus in the water splash was also extraordinarily happy. Fu Xiaosi closed his eyes, and then heard the wind that came and went freely above the high blue sky, and the sound of the wind passed through more distant places one after another.He thought, these sudden pains can only be healed by time.It's just that the idiot who has gone through such pain will become more brave, or will he become more vulnerable? Anyway, the long summer is finally over. Sunny Sunday, September 7, 1996 Summer is finally over It's been a week since school started.But I still can't feel any changes, or many things have changed unconsciously, but I didn't notice it because my eyes were too dazed. But I still can't help but look at the children who have just entered Asakawa No. 1 Middle School.It should be the mentality of the old people. Looking at them, the word "youth" echoed in their minds.Hell.Just over a year ago, I also looked at the gate of the new school curiously, looked at the endless camphor trees, and looked at the school after school after the names of the seniors and sisters who graduated from the school in the window of the school honor roll. Mouth has been amazed by a prestigious university. But now, when school is over, they have to fight for the seats in the cafeteria and the parking space in the carport with the children who just came in, use the same swimming pool, and stand in the same playground every Monday to watch the promotion. When the national flag was raised, the boulevards they once liked were covered by their young and invincible laughter, and more people who could paint appeared in the studios they used to use.Sometimes I feel really depressed, and this depression is particularly inexplicable. The classroom was moved to the second floor, and it was still the classroom in the middle.It's just that everyone knows that this is a temporary classroom, because the final division of arts and sciences will be decided after the first week of school.And everyone will enter a new class, become friends with new classmates, have new seats, new lockers, and a new duty schedule.Then gradually start to forget the previous things. Then gradually start to forget the previous things.When I finished writing this sentence, I suddenly felt a little sad.Because Fu Xiaosi and Lu Zhiang didn't talk much for a week, in fact, Xiaosi didn't talk much at first, and I was used to it long ago, but Lu Zhiang's bright smile really disappeared out of thin air.Sometimes I watched him peacefully ride a bicycle with Xiao Si across the school campus, watched him quietly leaning against the railing in a white shirt, or in the swimming pool without saying a word and constantly Back and forth, I felt in a trance that it was another Fu Xiaosi. Xiao Si had told me about his mother, but I couldn't help, and I didn't even dare to mention it in front of him, for fear that the atmosphere would get out of control in an instant.So we can only be silent together when we see him silent, and be quiet together when he is quiet. Sometimes I wonder, will Lu Zhiang's life be changed from now on?In his next ten, twenty, or even longer years, will he still laugh heartlessly like before?Will he still play tricks while wearing a hat with two pigtails?Would he still whistle at every girl who passed by? Thinking of this makes me feel sad. After writing the above paragraph, I went to stand on the balcony for a while, and now I continue to write.And just now, when I stood on the balcony and looked out into the dark night, I really didn't have any certainty about the future in my heart.The buildings in the distance were lit with dots of lights, which looked extraordinarily faint in the thick darkness.I feel that the world suddenly fell into a piece out of thin air, and then the night quickly filled in like ink, the sound disappeared without a trace, and all the future seemed to be buried in a deep river bed, buried under the thick silt meters, and then there is still a thousand meters on the surface of the water, and there will be no sun.The second year of high school that has come, the upcoming third year of high school, those fragments of thousands of troops crossing the single-plank bridge that have appeared countless times in the legends appear back and forth in my mind, making loud noises.It’s like the train that often appears in dreams, amidst the regular crashing of railroad tracks, it’s like someone holding a knife, pinpointing the weakest and most defenseless part of us, stabbing it gently, and then pulling it out, flesh and blood Blurred, then pierced in, until the pain becomes numb at the end, blurred now, no one can know the ending in the future. I suddenly feel like crying. Xiao Si told me a story about an angel before, but I forgot the details.But I still remember that the story probably said that everyone has an angel who has been guarding him/her. If this angel thinks your life is too sad and your mood is too sad, then he will become Someone around you, maybe your friend, maybe your lover, maybe your parents, maybe a stranger you only met once, these people quietly appear in your life, accompany you Have a good time for a while, and then he will leave quietly.So you have happy memories in your life. Even if your road is full of wind and snow in the future, you can still think of the happy things in the past, and you can still be brave.So those who leave us silently are actually angels returning to heaven, such as those friends who left, those strangers who helped you, those who loved you and separated, and the boys you once asked for directions. The classmate who once told a nice joke to make you happy, the singer who once sang a nice song to you, the writer who wrote a good book, they are all kind angels.Maybe you will feel sad or lost about their disappearance for a while, and you will look around for where they went and what country they went to, but in the end, you will believe that they are living quietly and contentedly in a certain corner of the world .So the loss and sadness of the past will no longer exist, and time is the greatest healer. Sometimes I also wonder, could Xiao Si and Zhi Ang be angels?Sometimes I feel that they are not like the boys in the world, they are not sloppy and noisy like ordinary boys, and they don’t deliberately play handsome and show off. They appear quietly every morning and evening, laughing quietly or frowning slightly, But no matter what, I can't hide the light on them. Sometimes I even think that when the two of them are standing on the crowded street, you can find them without any effort. And meet, meet is also an angel.Sometimes I feel that such a girl is so strong that it makes people feel distressed.Gritting his teeth and walking in the dark night, there are also snowstorms, swamps, and frightening nightmares that recur.Many nights I met and would tell me what happened to her in the bar. For example, one day a certain guest suddenly gave her flowers saying that she sang really well, and said that the boss gave her a salary increase this month because she was more and more popular with customers. In other words, there was a boy who came from a far away city to listen to her singing, because his friend told him that there was a girl who could sing very well in Asakawa, which even made Qingtian a little jealous.She told me of her dreams like a child describing the colorful candies in her glass jar.She said that one day she will be popular all over China and become the most popular star in the country. She wants everyone to feel empowered when they hear her songs. And become brave, and can continue the difficult and long road in the future.She wants every strong and kind person to find warmth and courage in her singing when they experience darkness and ugly human nature.When I meet and describe this to me, I always see some faint rays of light emanating from her body, emitting a halo of microwaves in the night as thick as sea water, like the summer I have seen since I was a child. Fireflies at night.And I also understand that these faint rays of light will one day make Yuyu gorgeous, and one day Yuyu will become the most gorgeous swallowtail butterfly, radiant in everyone's eyes. No matter when, I deeply believe in it. Thursday, December 18, 1997 Snow and Cold Feel Hopeless In any case, the cold is always hopeless. 这是我今天在语文书上看到的一个句子。在课间去水房冲咖啡的时候我就在不断地回想着这个句子。每到冬天在开水房前排队的人就会排成长龙。我靠在墙上反复地想起这句话，心里一瞬间有了一些无法言说的触觉。手上小司和我的杯子发出微微的热度，像是隔了无比久远的夏天。我都很差异语文书上会出现可以在我心里激起波澜的话。因为好长一段时间以来，我都是做着无数的语文试卷，机械地背着所有古文的意义，丝毫觉察不出任何的美感，在看到一句优美的诗词时，我第一个反映不是文字组合的瑰丽，而是它的下一句究竟该如何背诵。做完一张语文试卷，然后翻到参考书的最后几页对答案，然后自己给自己打分。 而这样无望的日子，似乎已经持续了好久。 我都发现自己好久没有写过日记了，再翻开以前的日记竟然觉得一切都恍如隔世。就在我依然觉得自己还是刚刚进入浅川一中的小丫头的时候，时间竟然不知不觉的快要走过三年了。我知道下一个夏天到来的时候，我们就会像学长学姐一样，离开这个长满香樟和回忆的地方，散落在天涯。 我们毕业了。这是一句残酷的话，可是每个人都必须要说。 其实回忆起来我都觉得诧异，不知道什么时候时间变得行走得如此迅速。就在我们不断地在寝室的那张硬木床上睡去醒来的过程里，年华就悄悄地离开了。 高三的日子很寂寞，每天都是做不完的试卷。并且身边只有傅小司一个人，然后回首高一的岁月就会变得有点哽咽。 七七因为家里的关系而且美术加试又好，所以已经保送上海美术学院了，所以她经常都不来上课，有空就会呆在家里画画，并且给我写信。而陆之昂在理科班，他和遇见一起留在了三班，而我和小司选了文科在七班上课。而小司也因为学习的压力而没有继续为杂志画画，而我也没有对他说起这个事情。只能在很多个晚上翻着以前祭祀的画而感伤，那些杂志带着陈旧的气味一本一本地堆在我的面前，像极了我同样陈旧的过去。 有时候上课我都会突然产生错觉，似乎我旁边就坐着遇见，她安静地趴在桌子上睡觉，阳光洒在她的头发上，眉头微微皱起来，梦中似乎也很倔强。而身后就是傅小司和陆之昂，小司在桌子上画着花纹，而陆之昂则在旁边睡觉。我一回过头去就可以看到那两张看了无数次的英气逼人的脸。 可是再眨一下眼睛，一切都回到现实。小司在教室的另外一边，很多时候当我穿越过各种各样的面孔朝他望过去的时候都可以看见他很严肃地望着黑板，然后飞快地在笔记本上写着什么。有时候看着他的侧脸会有些伤心，我也不知道是为什么。可能是因为知道这样的日子太过短暂，马上就要毕业吧。有时候也会听到不知道从哪里传来的钢琴声，不知道是不是陆之昂在弹奏呢。 而毕业了会是什么样子呢。我也不敢想象。以前听很多人说过，毕业就是一窗玻璃，我们要撞碎它，然后擦着凛冽的碎片走过去，血肉模糊之后开始一个完全不同的人生。 傅小司有时候也会想，时光怎么会突然加快了速度，似乎前一瞬间一切都还停留在1996年的那个炎热的夏天，而再过一个瞬间，已经是1997年的年末，12月，浅川已经下过好多场大雪，圣诞节的气氛越来越浓重，街道上都可以看见商店里挂出的各种礼物各种圣诞树和各 种漂亮的小天使，闭着眼睛也可以听到1998年一步一步地朝着他们走过来的声音。 很多时候傅小司独自穿越教学楼和操场之间的那条林荫道的时候都会恍惚地想起很多高一的事情，而高二，似乎整个就是被跳空掉的。似乎生命里凭空地少掉了1997。而1997究竟发生了一些什么事情呢？以至于自己一直到现在都还耿耿于怀。 其实是清楚的。记得比谁都清楚。只是刻意地不要去想起。 1997年发生了什么呢？1997年香港回归，整个中国热闹了差不多一个星期。但是1997年也有亚洲金融风暴，天空也似乎并不是完全那么灿烂。1997年还有中国的海军军舰首次航行访问全球。而此类种种，对于傅小司或者立夏来说都不具有太大的意义。而具有意义的是什么呢？ 是1997年文理分科的时候，陆之昂对自己说，小司，我要留下来念理科。 是1997年遇见对立夏说，立夏，我不想再考大学了。我走了，但是我会永远想念你。 1997年学校新建的文科楼投入使用，于是从那个时候起理科生和文科生开始在两栋不同的大楼里上课，中间隔了一个空旷的操场。 而到现在，傅小司已经习惯了每天早上和陆之昂一起把自行车停到车棚之后然后就挥手说再见，然后各自走向不同的教室。 而1997年改变的还有什么呢？是太多还是太少？傅小司想不明白，也就不太愿意费心思去思考了。很多时候其实已经没有什么时间去思考其他的东西，在高三这种水深火热的世界里，学习就是一切。 只是每天陆之昂和傅小司还是会一起上学一起回家。很多的时候陆之昂下课都会比傅小司早，因为七班的老师出了名的会拖堂，而且文科的考试比理科频繁，浅川一中的文科在全省都是很有名的。很多时候陆之昂放了学就会背着书包穿越过操场，从理科楼走到文科楼，然后在小司的教室外面等他放学一起回家。 有时候立夏朝窗外望出去的时候就会看见陆之昂带着耳机安静地坐在走廊上的样子，阳光缓慢地在他的身上绕着光圈，偶尔可以听到鸽子起飞的声音。在陆之昂抬头的时候他也会对着走神的立夏笑一下，然后调皮地做一个“专心上课”的像是老师教训人一样的表情。只有在这种时候立夏才会觉得陆之昂像是高一的样子，是个无忧无虑的少年。 可是谁都知道陆之昂的变化，立夏知道，遇见知道，七七知道，全校的喜欢陆之昂的女生都知道，可是谁都没有傅小司感受到的深刻。 而这种变化是溶解在这一整年的时光中的，像是盐撒进水里，然后逐渐逐渐溶解最后完全和水融合得看不出一点痕迹。在上学的路上，在陆之昂安静地坐在小司的教室外面等待他放学的时刻里，在偶尔钢琴教室里传出来的陆之昂的寂寞琴声里，在冬天和夏天的长假中， 在抬头和低头的间隙，在一条又一条的手机短信里，在日落时分回家的寂静的路上，傅小司一天一天地感受着他的转变，心里有一些难过，像是一漾一漾漫出来的潮水。 而陆之昂究竟变成什么样子了呢？是安静么？还是寂寞呢？讲不明白。立夏很多时候都觉得陆之昂像是变成了另外一个傅小司，只是比小司看上去平和，可是更加的寂静。因为小司是一种带着锐利棱角的沉默，而陆之昂，日渐变成一个对什么都格外温和的人，不像以前爱说话，爱笑，爱对着过往的漂亮女生吹口哨，他现在每天安静地骑车，有空的时候会叫着小司立夏一起去图书馆，偶尔开始带着黑色的边框眼镜皱着眉头做题，在图书馆会找阳光充足的角落，然后拿出很厚的参考书开始安静地在草稿纸上演算，最夸张的是他还会用数学的观念来与你分析生活中遇到的困扰，活脱脱一副被理科长年迫害的书呆子形象。只有很少的时候，并且周围只有像立夏遇见七七这样的很熟悉的人的时候，陆之昂才会回复到曾经的样子，会讲很多的话，有着生动的表情，偶尔和小司比划着拳脚，可是更多的时候都是带着微笑的一张无比安静的脸。当看着陆之昂专心在草稿上画出一个又一个函数图象时，立夏就会回想起当初那个在小司和自己旁边肆无忌惮地打瞌睡的陆之昂，想起那个笑容如同春日的朝阳一样的陆之昂，心里就会突然地划过一阵风，把那些曾经的往事都从心里往四下里吹散开去。 是高三改变了一切么？还是我们改变了自己，在高三的这一年？ 自从立夏和傅小司离开了三班之后，遇见就在班上几乎没有说过话，只是偶尔和陆之昂聊天。遇见在每节课下课后的休息时间里，都会趴在阳台上朝着操场那边的阳台眺望，有时候会看见立夏经常穿的那件红色的衣服，很红很红的红颜色，在一楼的走道里来来回回，有时候她会和傅小司一起出现在阳台上，可是因为隔得太远，遇见也看不见他们的表情。可是她还是会很开心地冲着立夏挥舞着手臂，尽管她知道很多时候立夏都没有看见她。而陆之昂经常都会站在自己身边安静地微笑。 在立夏离开之后，应付老师突然提问的差使似乎就交给了陆之昂，而班上发生的很多事情也是陆之昂在帮着遇见处理。有时候遇见会问陆之昂，她说，你离开了小司会觉得寂寞么？陆之昂只是笑，也不说话，然后会不带任何表情地说，其实遇见是因为离开了立夏觉得寂寞，所以希望从我口中听到类似的字眼吧？遇见就是这么好强的人，永远都不会说寂寞啊，孤单啊这样的话。其实这样不丢脸啊，你根本没必要觉得难堪。就像我每天都会对小司哇啦哇啦地抱怨说离开他真是好无聊啊整个班上都是一群理科机器。 遇见白了他一眼，说，你少来吧，你哪有哇啦哇啦，你现在不是已经转型了吗，安静沉默王子型。哇啦哇啦是两年前的你吧？ 一句话把陆之昂说得灰头土脸，憋了半天后开始抱怨世界不公平好心没好报。遇见看着他的样子也没办法发脾气，只是觉得小司有这样的朋友真是很好呢，心里默默地对他说了声“谢谢”。 尽管每天晚上遇见依然会和立夏聊天聊到很晚，会告诉她在酒吧发生的很多事情，会告诉她青田每天送她回学校，会告诉她酒吧拿到的钱越来越多，可是却一直不敢讲那个在她心里已经埋藏了一段时间的秘密，甚至连青田都没有讲。因为遇见总是觉得一旦自己讲出了口，那么一切事情就再也不能回头了。彻底的，永远的，不能回头。 很多个晚上遇见都会回想这一年多发生的事情。学校的生活只有立夏几个人让她觉得还有一点意义的存在，而其它，其它的种种事物无论是沉落或者飞升，都不会让她哪怕多看一眼。她依然另类地行走在所有浅川一中的女生眼里，依然穿另类的衣服带着越来越多的耳环。并且在高二结束的那一天软硬兼施成功地拉立夏去打了耳洞，然后买了一副耳钉，一人一个。遇见依然记得立夏打完耳洞惊恐的表情，并且每三秒钟就会去弄一下耳朵边上的头发，生怕有人会看到。不过后来立夏比自己都还要喜欢那枚耳钉。很多次遇见都看到立夏对着镜子里的那枚耳钉臭屁得不得了，于是就开始嘲笑她一直嘲笑到她脸红，说她是没打过耳洞的良家妇女。可是嘲笑归嘲笑，心里却是满满的温暖。 遇见你总是会笑我，很讨厌的。可是我很多时候真的会看着耳洞发呆，我到现在依然还记得当时因为疼痛而流出的眼泪。很多时候我都在想，在我曾经年轻的岁月里，我和遇见一起遭遇过一模一样的疼痛，那么以后的日子，即使是需要下地狱，我想我也会不皱眉头地跟着她一起吧。因为我一直那么认为，只要拉着遇见的手，无论朝着什么方向奔跑，都向是奔向天堂。这个想法，无论什么时候都没有改变过。 ——立夏·2002 这一年里有很多时候立夏也没有回学校，晚上会住在青田在外面租的房子。可是遇见明白，青田也不会对自己怎么样。哪怕是自己睡在他的旁边，头枕着他的胳膊，他也不会对自己乱来。遇见在很多个晚上听着青田呼吸的声音就会觉得世界特别安静。一整个黑暗封闭的空间里全部都是他呼吸出来的气息，然后再被自己呼吸进去，然后他再呼吸，如此循环。encounter 见因为这些温柔无比的意象而在很多个夜晚想起种种类似“永远”、“幸福”等平日里永远不会想起的字眼。 在这一年里，青田拣了一只猫回家，取了名字叫布莱克。立夏也开始慢慢地学会做菜做饭，有时候也会和青田去菜市场买菜。甚至也渐渐地养成和青田一样的习惯，在每天太阳落山的时候念一段圣经，所以很多时候遇见书包里都背着一本厚厚的圣经，在每天放学人去楼空之后念完一小段再离开教室。 1996年圣诞节的时候青田买了手机送给遇见，他自己也买了一只，并且和遇见的一模一样。很多时候遇见上课都会收到青田的短信。有时候问问肚子饿不饿，有时候告诉她布莱克顽皮掉进了路边的水沟现在湿淋淋地跑回家来，有时候就仅仅是突然的一个念头——“窗户外面起风了，我突然很想你。” 有时候遇见都会觉得，如果和青田结婚，应该是件很幸福的事情吧，在一日又一日的平淡里，却有着种种微小的温暖始终如阳光照耀。 可自从那天酒吧的老板告诉了遇见那个消息之后，遇见就觉得生命似乎开始缓慢地燃烧起来。带着浓烟甚至焦灼感，焚烧起一整个生命。 ——遇见，我朋友现在在北京的一家唱片公司做制作人，你有兴趣去北京唱歌吗？ 那天早上遇见终于鼓起勇气发了条短消息给青田，她说，我要去北京了，你会陪我一起么？ 而一整个上午，遇见的手机没有任何的响动。一开始遇见还可以静下心来想一些别的事情或者睡觉，而当时间越来越久，遇见开始觉得心神不宁。在去操场上做操的时候，在去水房倒水的时候，在站在阳台上朝着立夏她们的文科楼眺望的时候，她都会不断地看手机不断地看手机一直看到自己都错觉得那个黑暗的屏幕永远都不会再亮起来为止。 中午回寝室休息的时候，遇见频繁地看手机还惹得立夏一阵嘲笑，立夏说遇见你怎么突然开始注意起手机来啦以前不是都不管的么，莫非青田向你求婚啦？ 立夏说这个话的时候其实并没想到遇见会发那么大的脾气，所以当遇见突然把手机朝床上一摔的时候立夏有点目瞪口呆，而且遇见用力太大，手机撞到床靠着的那面墙上，瞬间屏幕就暗淡了下来。 下午放学之后，立夏骑着车出了学校的大门，然后朝着山坡下骑出去，心里很多难过的细小的感觉。立夏把遇见的手机放在书包里，准备带出去帮她修好，因为毕竟是因为自己的一句多话才让遇见摔了手机。下午上学的时候遇见把手机留在寝室也没有带走，立夏提醒她的时候她也只是淡淡地说了一句，坏都坏了，带着干嘛。 在手机的维修部呆了大概一个小时，天色开始渐渐昏暗，那个修手机的男孩子终于露出 了笑容，然后递给立夏，说，那，修好了。 立夏按了电源，然后屏幕亮起来，而之后过了一会，立夏刚刚要骑上车子回学校，手机就震动起来，立夏不小心按了阅读，结果出现了青田的短消息： ——遇见，我很抱歉还是不跟你一起去北京了，对不起。 骑回学校的路上，立夏脑子里一直都是各种各样的问题，旧的问题还没消失，新的问题就重新占据脑海，搞得自己像神经病一样。 ——北京？什么北京？ ——遇见去北京干什么？从来都没有说起过呀。 ——是去北京旅行？还是去生活？ ——要去多久？什么时间去？ 而所有的问题悬浮在黄昏的空气里，那些黄昏空气中特有的胶片电影里似的颗粒顺着呼吸进入身体，立夏感觉全身长满毛茸茸的刺，充满了烦躁和不安的情绪。 把车停在车棚后，立夏在朝文科楼奔跑的时候正好碰见下课的陆之昂，他看到立夏于是就告诉了她下午发生的事情。 起初是一个很小的矛盾，班主任因为遇见上课睡觉而让她在教室后面罚站。而后来的演变像是被照上了核辐射一样产生了奇异的变种，所以在遇见与老师的对话里所有的学生都目瞪口呆。