Chapter 19 Chapter Eighteen: Noelle and Catherine

For three months Larry and Noelle lived the perfect, idyllic life at the villa in Rafina.Magical days followed one another like magic, the sun was shining and the sky was cloudless.During working hours, Larry did what he loved—flying; and when he was free, he went to Rafina to live with Noelle for a day, or a weekend, or a full week.At first Larry feared that the arrangement would become a burden and drag him into the kind of family life he hated; but as soon as he saw Noelle, he was fascinated, and he began eagerly Looking forward to spending time with her.Sometimes Noelle would suddenly have to go on a trip with Demiris and had to cancel a weekend and Larry would be alone at the villa and find himself angry and jealous with Noelle and Demiris on his mind. Reese together.When he went back to the villa a few days later, Noelle was surprised and delighted to see how thirsty he looked.

"You miss me," she said. He nodded: "I want to die." "very good." "How is Demiris?" She hesitated for a moment: "Same as usual." Larry noticed her hesitation: "What's the matter?" "I considered what you said." "what?" "You said you hated being sneaky, that you hated being seen like a prisoner. I hated it too. Whenever Constantine was with me, I wanted to be with you. I told you once, Larry, I want all of you. I mean I don't want to co-own you. I want you to marry me." He stared at her in amazement, not prepared for what she said, and was at a loss for a moment.

Noelle was looking at him too. "Will you marry me?" "You know what I want. But how to get married? You keep telling me what Demiris will do if he finds out about us." She shook her head. "He won't find out. He won't know if we're clever and organized. I'm not his property, Larry, and I can leave him. There's nothing he can do about it. He's too proud to Will come to block my decision on this matter. After a month or two, you quit your job. We go somewhere else, alone with each other, maybe to America. We get married there. I have a lot of money , can't be spent in a lifetime. I'll buy you a licensed airline, or a flight school, or whatever you like."

He stood and listened silently, while weighing the pros and cons in his mind.Speaking of "lost", what can he lose?A lowly job as a pilot.When I think of owning a plane and running an airline company myself, a stream of clear spring water flows through my body, which is really pleasant.He himself would have converted B-25s and maybe even the new DC-6.Four radial engines, eighty-five passengers.And Noelle, yes, he needed her.God, what is there to hesitate? "What about my wife?" he asked. "Tell her that you want a divorce." "I don't know if she'll agree."

"Not in a demanding tone," Noelle replied, "in a direct commanding tone." There was a decided, unalterable tone in her voice. Larry nodded in agreement, "Okay." "You won't regret it, honey. I promise," Noelle said. ※※※ For Catherine, time has lost the rhythm associated with human physiology; she has fallen into the chaos of time, unable to distinguish day from night.Larry hardly ever came home.Because she no longer had the courage to find any excuses and face others, Catherine had already stopped meeting friends and guests.Papps tried to come to her several times, but in the end he didn't dare.She found herself able to do things and communicate with others only by indirect means: telephone calls, letters, and telegrams.If she spoke face to face, she was like a stone, and her words flew away like sparks when striking a stone to make fire, it was all in vain.Time brings pain, and friends bring pain.The only relief Catherine found was a drowsy state of oblivion after drinking.Ah, alcohol is a wonderful thing. It can dampen pain, blunt the sharp sting of defeat, and soften other people who have been hit by the harsh reality of society.

When Catherine first arrived in Athens, she and William Fraser corresponded frequently, exchanging news and keeping each other abreast of the activities of mutual friends and enemies.However, since her problems with Larry had arisen, she had not been in the mood to write to Fraser.The last three letters from Fraser have not been answered, and one of them has not even been opened.She simply wasn't equipped to deal with anything outside of the microcosm of self-pity she'd fallen into. ※※※ One day, Catherine received a telegram and threw it on the table without reading it. A week later the doorbell rang suddenly, and it was William Fraser.

Catherine stared at him blankly, unable to believe her eyes. "Bill!" she cried hoarsely, "Bill Fraser!" He was about to begin to speak when Catherine noticed that the excited look in his eyes changed to something else, to startled and shocked. "Bill, honey," she said, "what are you doing here?" "I'm in Athens on business," Fraser explained. "Did you get my telegram?" Catherine looked at him, searching her mind. "I don't know," she said finally. She ushered him into the living room, where old newspapers were a mess, the ashtray was full of cigarette butts, and there were leftovers on the plates.

"I'm sorry the room is such a mess," she said, waving her hand vaguely. "I've been busy." Fraser eyed her apprehensively. "How are you, Catherine?" "Me? That's unbelievable. How about a drink?" "It's only eleven o'clock in the morning." She nodded. "Yeah. You're right, Bill. It's a little too early for a drink. To tell you the truth, I wouldn't drink it if you weren't welcome here and dusted off. You're the whole earth that would make me drink at ten o'clock in the morning." The only one with a drink at one o'clock."

Fraser watched in amazement as Catherine staggered to the drinks cabinet, where she poured herself a large glass and him a small one. "Do you like brandy?" she asked, handing him his glass. "I used to hate it, but you'll get used to it." Fraser took the glass and put it down. "Where's Larry?" he asked softly. "Larry? Well, good old Larry flew off to a man's place. You know, he works for the richest man in the world. Demiris owns everything, including Larry." He watched her carefully for a while again: "Does Larry know that you drink?"

Catherine slammed her glass down and stood before him, waddling. "What are you asking, does Larry know that I drink?" She asked angrily, "Who said I drank? It's just to celebrate reuniting with an old friend, you don't have to attack me!" "Catherine," he began, "I really..." "You think you can just come in here and accuse me of being a drunk?" "I'm so sad, Catherine," Fraser said bitterly. "I think you need help." "Oh, you're wrong," she retorted, "I don't need any help. Do you know why? Because I—myself—myself..." She searched for the right words and finally had to admit that she couldn't. "I don't need any help."

Fraser looked at her for a moment and said, "Now I have to go to a meeting. Come out to dinner with me tonight." "Okay." She nodded. "Well, I'll see you at eight o'clock." ※※※ After watching Bill Fraser go out, Catherine walked into the bedroom with unsteady steps, slowly opened the bathroom door, and looked at the mirror behind the door.She stood there motionless, unable to believe what she saw, the mirror must be playing tricks on her. Beneath the surface, she was still the sweet little girl her father doted on; still the young college girl who hung out with Ron Peterson in a motel and heard him say, "My God, Cathy, you're my The most beautiful girl I ever saw"; and Bill Fraser, putting his arms around her and saying "You're beautiful, Catherine"; and Larry, who also said, "Keep your pretty face, Cathy, You are so pretty." While reminiscing about her past experience, she looked at the portrait in the mirror and said loudly in a hoarse voice: "Who are you?" So, the sad, haggard, and unattractive woman in the mirror Weeping, tears of emptiness and despair rolling down the filthy, drunken face. A few hours later, the doorbell rang.She heard Bill Fraser's voice calling, "Catherine! Catherine. Are you home?" Then, the doorbell rang again for a while.Later, the shouting stopped, the ringing of the bell stopped, and the room became more empty and indifferent, only Catherine and the stranger in the mirror were alone together. ※※※ At nine o'clock the next morning Catherine took a taxi to the Rue Patisserie.The doctor's name was Nicodis, and he was a tall, stocky man.The white hair on the head is long and dense, disheveled and unkempt.His face looks very intelligent, his eyes are kind, and his attitude is easy-going, without any pretensions of an elder. A nurse ushers Catherine into Dr. Nicodis's private consulting room. Seeing her come in, he pointed to the chair: "Please sit down, Mrs. Douglas." Catherine sat down, looking uneasy and a little nervous.She tried her best not to let her body tremble. "What's wrong with you?" She was about to open her mouth to answer, but in an instant she stopped speaking in despair.Oh, my God—she thought—where do I begin? "I need help," she said finally.Her voice was so dry that it was a little itchy to hear.She really wanted a drink. The doctor leaned back against the back of his chair and looked at her. "How old are you?" "Twenty-eight." She looked into his face as she said.Nicodis was hiding her astonishment, but she noticed that the doctor seemed to be delighted by the anomaly. "Are you American?" "yes." "Do you live in Athens now?" She nodded. "How long has it been?" "Thousands of years. We moved here before the Peloponnesian War." The doctor smiled. "Sometimes I feel that way too." He gave Catherine a cigarette.When she reached out to take it, her fingers trembled involuntarily.If Dr. Nicoldis noticed, he said nothing.He lit a cigarette for her. "What kind of help do you need, Mrs. Douglas?" Catherine looked at him. "I don't know," she murmured, "I don't know." "Do you feel ill?" "I'm sick. I think I must be very sick. Now I'm so ugly." She knew she wasn't crying, but her eyes were wet and tears were streaming down her cheeks. "Do you drink, Mrs. Douglas?" asked the doctor softly. Catherine stared at him in panic, embarrassed and completely passive. "Sometimes a little." "How much to drink?" She took a deep breath. "Not much. See—it depends." "Did you drink today?" he asked. "No." He sat and watched her carefully. "You are not really ugly, you know," said the doctor in a soft tone. "Your body is somewhat swollen, and your skin and hair are not well protected. Behind these appearances is a very attractive young woman. " She burst into tears, and he sat still, letting her cry.Catherine was crying in pain, and vaguely heard the buzzer of the intercom on the doctor's consulting table ringing several times, but the doctor ignored it.After a while of crying, she slowly calmed down.Catherine took out a handkerchief and blew her nose. "I'm sorry," she said apologetically, "can you—can you help me?" "It's all up to you," Dr. Nicoldis replied. "We don't know exactly what your problem is?" "Please take a good look at it," Catherine replied. He shook his head. "That's not the real problem, Mrs. Douglas. It's just a symptom. It's a phenomenon. Forgive my presumption. If I'm going to help, we've got to be open and honest. A young woman becomes like you , there must be a big reason. Is your husband still alive?" "Only on holidays and weekends." He looked at her. "Do you live with him?" "Only when he comes home." "What does he do?" "He's Constantine Demiris' private jet pilot." She saw a clear reaction on the doctor's face, but was it because he heard Demiris's name or was it because he had a crush on Larry? If she knows something about the situation, she will not know. "Have you heard about my husband?" she asked. "No." It seemed to Catherine that he might not be telling the truth. "Do you love your husband, Mrs. Douglas?" asked the doctor. Catherine hesitated to speak.She understood that how she answered his questions was crucial, not only to the doctor, but to herself as well.Yes, she loves her husband; yes, she hates him; yes, sometimes she is so angry with him that she can kill him; Willing to die for him.So, what words can be used to make it clear?Maybe it should be "love". Finally she said, "Yes." "Then does your husband love you too?" Catherine thinks about the other women Larry has had in his life and his infidelities.She thought again of the dreadful stranger in the mirror last night, and it was no wonder Larry didn't need her, and he couldn't be blamed for that.Still, who's to say which one struck first?Did the woman in the mirror contribute to his infidelity, or did his infidelity contribute to the woman in the mirror?She felt her cheeks wet with tears again. Catherine shook her head in despair: "I—I don't know." "Have you ever had a nervous breakdown, or neurasthenia?" At this time, she looked at him with a cautious look in her eyes: "no. Do you think I need this?" He didn't smile. "The human state of mind," he said slowly, choosing the right words carefully, "is a very delicate thing, Mrs. Douglas. The human mind can only bear a certain amount of pain. If the pain becomes unbearable, will escape to the depths of the mind and be buried. We are working on this problem. Your thoughts and feelings are too tense." He looked at her for a while. "You can come and ask for help, I think That's a good thing." "I know I'm a little nervous," Catherine said, taking a defensive position, "so I'll have a drink and let myself relax." "No," he said bluntly, "you're drinking to escape reality." Nicodis stood up and walked up to her: "I think there's probably a lot we could do for you. I said 'we ’ means you and me. It’s not that simple.” "Tell me what I should do." "First, I'm going to transfer you to a hospital for a thorough health check. It is estimated that you are basically healthy, and no substantial problems will be found. Second, you have to stop drinking. Then, I will prescribe special medicine for you. Recipe. That's all for now, how about it?" Catherine hesitated, but then nodded. "You sign up for gymnastics classes, where you do regular exercises to restore your original posture. I have an excellent physical therapist here who will give you various massages. Also, you go to the beauty salon once a week .All of this takes time, Mrs. Douglas. You didn't become what you are overnight, so you can't change overnight." He smiled at her, reassuring her, Give her confidence. "But I can assure you that every few months, maybe even just a few weeks, you'll be another woman and feel much better. You'll be proud when you look in the mirror again; When your husband looks at you, he will find you lovable." Catherine's eyes gazed at him, inspired.It was as if an unbearable burden had been lifted from her, as if she had suddenly been given a new chance at life. "However, you have to be soberly aware that I can only suggest such an arrangement for you." The doctor said slowly, "The specifics are all up to you." "I can," Catherine said enthusiastically, "I promise." "Stopping drinking is the hardest thing." "No, it won't be difficult." Although Catherine said so in her mouth, she had to admit in her heart that it was indeed difficult.The doctor was right: she drank to escape reality.Now, she has a purpose and knows which direction to go.She was going to win Larry back. "I won't drink at all from now on," she said firmly. Seeing the expression on her face, the doctor nodded with satisfaction: "I trust you, Mrs. Douglas." Catherine stood up.She was taken aback by the clumsiness and inflexibility of her movements.However, this is all about to change. "I should go, I want to buy some clothes that fit me," she said with a smile. The doctor took a card and wrote a few words on it. "This is the address of the hospital. They will wait for you. After you have a physical examination, you can come to me again." ※※※ On the street, Catherine was looking for a taxi, and on a second thought, get her taxi.I might as well start exercising now.She thought, and walked up.As she passed a shop window, she stopped and looked at her reflection in the windowpane. She blamed Larry for being too quick, blaming him for the broken relationship without giving a second thought to her own responsibility.Why would he come home to a woman like her now?Such a stranger with an unfamiliar face had attached herself to her without anyone knowing it, and she didn't know it at all.Terrible!She wondered how many couples were separated like this, without arguing at all--of course, there are not many divorces after quarrels these days, Catherine thought with a grimace--but Parted in sobs and whimpers, as good old TS Eliot said.Well, luckily it's over.From today, she no longer looks backward, she only looks forward, to a bright future. ※※※ At this time, Catherine arrived in Thessaloniki district, where there are many upper-class people, and was about to walk past a beauty salon when she turned around and walked in on a sudden impulse.The reception room, clad in white marble, is spacious and elegant. A condescending female receptionist looked at Catherine with disappointment and said, "Well, what's the matter?" "I want to make an appointment, I want tomorrow morning," Catherine said, "I want all kinds of beauty projects. A new hairstyle—" The name of the senior hair stylist in this beauty salon suddenly flashed into her mind : "I want Aleko." The woman shook her head: "I can make an appointment for you, ma'am, but you have to ask someone else to do it for you." "Listen," said Catherine firmly, "tell Aleko that if he won't make it for me, I'll go all over Athens and tell everyone that I'm his regular customer." The woman's eyes widened in horror. "I—I'll do my best to help you," she said hastily. "Come at ten o'clock tomorrow morning." "Thank you." Catherine smiled and said, "I'll be on time." She walked out after she finished speaking. ※※※ She walked for a while, and saw a small hotel in front of her, with a sign on the glass window: "Mrs. Pierris, tell your fortune with your mouth." This person's name seemed a little familiar, and she suddenly remembered the story Earl Paps told her about Mrs. Pierris that day.It was about a police chief and a lion, the details of which she forgot.Catherine knew that fortune-telling was nonsense, just cheating money.At this moment, however, the thought of stepping in and giving it a try is irresistible. She needed to reassure her of any remaining doubts, to be reassured that she had a bright new future.She needs someone to tell her that life is going to be fun again, so live well.Thinking about it, she opened the door casually and walked in. It took Catherine a long time to adjust to the dark tone of the room, having been out in bright sunlight for so long.In one corner of the room she could see a liquor counter with some tables and chairs near it. A languid barman came up to her and asked in Greek what she wanted to drink. "Thank you, I don't want anything to drink," said Catherine, genuinely glad to have said that.She repeated: "I don't want anything to drink. I'm looking for Mrs. Pierris. Is she here?" The waiter gestured to an empty table in the corner, and Catherine went over and sat down.After a few minutes, she noticed someone standing beside her, so she looked up. The woman was strangely old, very thin, and dressed in black, with a weather-beaten face that had been shriveled into triangles and squares. "You want to find me?" she said in English. "Yes," said Catherine, "I want you to tell my fortune." The thin old woman sat down and held up a hand, and the waiter came up with a tray with a cup of espresso without milk and sugar.He put the coffee in front of Catherine. "Not for me," said Catherine. "I didn't—" "Drink it," said Mrs. Pierres. Catherine looked at the old woman in surprise, picked up the coffee, and took a sip.The taste is too strong and bitter.She put the glass down. "Drink more," said the old woman. Catherine was about to protest, but then she thought, who knows what kind of medicine she sells in her gourd.What they don't tell their fortunes they make up for by making their customers drink an espresso, maybe.She took a swig of coffee.It's disgusting to drink. "Drink more," said Mrs. Pierris. Catherine shrugged helplessly and drank the rest of the coffee.A thick, thick layer of coffee grounds was left in the bottom of the cup. Mrs. Pierris nodded in satisfaction, and stretched out her hand to take the cup from Catherine.She looked at the bottom of the glass for a long, long time without saying a word. Catherine sat there stupidly, wondering what the old woman was up to.A smart, pretty woman like me sitting here, dumbfounded, watching some crazy old Greek crone stare at an empty coffee cup? "You come from a faraway place," said the old woman suddenly. "You're right," said Catherine casually. Mrs. Pierris looked up into Catherine's eyes.The old woman's gaze was gloomy. "Go home quickly." Catherine swallowed, "I—my home is here." "Go back to where you came from." "You mean—America?" "Wherever it is. Get out of this place--the sooner the better!" "Why?" Catherine said, feeling a wave of dread. "What's wrong?" The old woman shook her head.Her voice was hoarse, and she seemed to be struggling to speak: "It's all around you." "what?" "Let's go!" The old woman's voice sounded like a sense of urgency, the pitch was high, and it was as sharp as the cry of a wild animal in pain. Catherine's hair stood on end as she listened. "You're scaring me," she moaned. "Please tell me what's wrong." The old woman shook her head, eyes full of fear. "Get out of here as soon as possible before you get wrapped up." Catherine couldn't help panicking, and even her breathing became short of breath: "Why haven't you wrapped me up yet?" The old woman's face was disfigured with pain and terror. "Death. Death is about to come to you." After speaking, she stood up and retreated into the dark room behind. Catherine sat with her heart pounding and her hands shaking.She clenched her hands tightly to keep them from twitching.She noticed the waiter's eyes sneaking up on her.She was about to order a drink, but restrained herself before she could speak.A crazy old woman must not let a bright future be ruined.Still sitting, she took several breaths and finally calmed herself down.After a long time she stood up, picked up her purse and gloves, and walked slowly out of the tavern. Outside, in the blinding bright sunlight, Catherine felt much better.She thought, how stupid just now, to be frightened by an old woman.Superstitious activities like this should be banned, and they should not be allowed to ravage people's hearts arbitrarily.However, this superstition cannot be fully believed or unbelieved.From now on--said Catherine to herself--you must live well and stay far from death. ※※※ Catherine walked into her apartment and glanced at the living room, as if seeing the interior for the first time.What a mess: there was a thick layer of dust everywhere, clothes here and there, in a mess.It made Catherine incredible that she hadn't noticed it in her past drunken state.Well, the first lesson in physical training she was going to take was to keep the room tidy. When she was about to go to the kitchen, she suddenly heard the sound of a drawer closing in the bedroom.who?She tiptoed, apprehensively, toward the bedroom door. It's Larry in the bedroom.There was one closed suitcase on his bed and he was packing a second suitcase. Catherine stood at the door for a moment, watching him. "If those things were donated to the Red Cross," she said, "I would have given them." Larry glanced at her. "I'm leaving." "A business trip for Demiris again?" "No," he said, and kept arranging things. "These are for my own use. I'm moving out of here." "Larry..." "There's nothing to discuss." She walked into the bedroom, trying to control her emotions. "However, but there is—there are a lot of issues that can be discussed. I went to the doctor today and he said I will be fine." Her words burst out like a torrent. "I am determined to stop drinking. I..." "Cathy, it's over. I'm getting a divorce." His words lashed at her heart like a whip.She stood, biting her lower lip, swallowing the bitter secretions welling up in her throat, preventing it from regurgitating. "Larry," she said slowly so as not to shake her voice, "I don't blame you now for thinking that much. I was at fault for a lot of things—maybe most of them—but things will be different in a moment. I Change—I really do.” She held out a hand, pleading, “All I ask is to wait a little longer and give me a chance.” Larry turned to face her, his blue eyes hard and disdainful: "I'm already in love with someone else. All I ask of you is a divorce." Catherine stood for a long time, then walked back to the living room, where she sat on the couch, staring blankly at a Greek fashion magazine, while he continued packing. She heard Larry's voice say, "The lawyer I hired will come to you in a few days." Then there was the slamming of the door. ※※※ Catherine sat carefully flipping through the pages of the fashion magazine.When she turned to the last page, she closed the magazine and placed it neatly on the corner of the table. She walked into the bathroom, opened the simple medicine box, took out a razor blade, and cut off the blood vessels on her two wrists.