Chapter 43 Chapter Forty-Two

In the past, going to work in the ministry every day was a pleasure for Lu Tiehan; now, going to work every day has become a headache. When he stood waiting for the bus on the streets of Beijing, where winter was just emerging, he felt like the sun was setting. In the past, there was a car to pick him up, so he could comfortably leave home after seven o'clock.It's only a little past six o'clock, and it's just dawn, and he's already standing at the bus station waiting dejectedly.The people waiting for the bus at the stop sign poked there with drooping faces in the clear morning wind, like rows of uneven comb teeth on a broken comb.He was tall with the file folder in his arms, with a calm demeanor, and he stood out from the crowd in the queue.Some factory workers who were carrying their lunch boxes and stamping anxiously on the spot often raised their sleepy eyes and looked at him attentively, as if trying to figure out his identity.When those sizing eyes met his, they immediately dodged away, and after a while, they turned sideways again.He stood there motionless, his thick forehead and powerful face resting heavily on his vertical neck like the head of a stone statue.As the wind blows across my face, I can feel the coldness and sharpness of the wind, as well as the roughness and heat of my own flesh.The streets with cars and bicycles often slanted to the distance in his field of vision, which made him feel that the streets were uneven, and the traffic and traffic were like giant slides, sliding past his eyes one after another.

When the car came, people immediately disordered the formation, scrambling to squeeze up.Of course he won't join forces, but he can't be squeezed out by those who come after him again and again.His policy is that when it is his turn to be the first in line, as soon as the car appears in the distance, he squints his eyes to measure the speed of the car, judges the position of the front and rear doors when the bus stops, and then, in a calm, uncontested way In the snatching movement, place yourself exactly in the position of the car door.At this time, even if the people behind are crowding up, he can still board the car without losing his identity in the crowded push.He had no choice but to let go of the ensuing crash of a crowd of people swarming into vehicles, the kind that characterizes virtually all mass movements.As long as you open the car door, as long as a group of people scramble to get on the car, then if you want to keep your stability in the crowd and collision, you must choose your own foothold.After the car started, although the collision on the car made him very uncomfortable, however, the pressure from the front, rear, left and right canceled each other out, and when he was firmly squeezed into a position by those who were more than half a head shorter than him, he only needed to Symbolically raise your hand and grab the handle bar on the car.Looking at the streets passing by quickly and slowly outside the car window, one can also feel the cordial feeling of being one with the people.

This feeling made him think of the countryside.When eating, every family squats at the door with a big bowl, and you talk to each other while eating.A big big bowl, almost enough to hold the stick noodles in a pot now, held it hot in his hand, scraped the layer of cold skin on the surface with chopsticks, gathered it to his mouth, and drank it slurply.The cold wind blew, and a layer of cold skin formed on the scalding mushy surface.Holding the side of the bowl, scraping the surface to gather them together, and drinking it half-hot and half-warm again.The stick batter is steaming white, steaming on the forehead is hot, and the wind is blowing over the forehead is cool.The bowl is as big as the face, and the face is facing the bowl.The hot paste flowed down the throat through the mouth, making the entire digestive system extremely comfortable.There are pickle strips floating on the paste, chewing salty and crunchy in the mouth.If you have become proficient at drinking mush, once you drink it to the end, the inner wall of the bowl is still smooth and clean, and you must not let it dry out and be covered with crumbling batter.The chatter of the neighbors, the sound of drinking hot water, mixed with the barking of cocks and dogs, the smoke from the kitchen, the creaking of the water well, the shouting of the old woman, and the neighing of the donkey, it is really a beautiful mountain village scene now.The Cultural Revolution was really going to knock me down, and it was nothing more than packing up and going back to my hometown to farm, and that would be a good destination.

He swallowed, feeling the scalding taste of drinking from a big bowl in his imagination just now.The sweet cornmeal paste is still in the mouth, the heat of the big bowl is still in the palm of the hand, and even the cold and hot feeling left by the edge of the bowl at the corner of the mouth is still fresh when swallowing saliva. It’s still the gray and white eight-story building, the same high gate, with ten or twenty steps in front of the gate, and there are still guards standing at the gate. However, when he walks up the steps now, it feels completely different from the feeling of walking out of the car before. .The people who met him did not greet him with affection and respect as in the past, or nodded lightly, or simply turned a blind eye and hurried past.Some people quickly passed by, turned their heads to look at him, and went straight to the door without saying anything, leaving their backs to him very impolitely.At the gate, the familiar guards no longer showed any special respect for him.Some guards looked at him indifferently, while others deliberately turned their faces away because they failed to maintain their respectful attitude in the past.He entered the gate insensibly.

As usual, the screen wall in the lobby on the first floor is where the most important big-character posters are posted.This place is full of people every morning. Fortunately, he has the advantage of being tall, so he can see the main content without the crowd of losing his identity.The chief minister has long been labeled as a gangster, and several deputy ministers have also been criticized by big-character posters.Whether it will be a gangster in the future, no one can tell.The big-character posters here almost all point to the ministry leaders, or to their backstage in the central government.Bypassing the screen wall, there are stairs facing you, and there are elevators at the corridors on both sides.He and many people neither went up the stairs nor took the elevator, but passed through the aisles on both sides of the stairs, flowing like water to the back door of the ministry building.Out the back door was bustling.It used to be an open lawn, and on the opposite side of the lawn was the staff canteen of the Ministry.Behind the staff canteen is the dormitory area.Except for the ministers, most of the cadres and workers of the Ministry of Agriculture, Forestry and Animal Husbandry live in this compound.Now, the open space between the ministry building and the staff canteen has become the big-character poster area.The big-character posters made of rows of wooden pillars and straw mats were covered with colorful big-character posters, and dense crowds crowded and moved between the big-character posters.Most of the people who read the big-character posters were cadres and workers in the Ministry, as well as their family members, and there were also people from other agencies and schools who came to collude with them.Now, the office buildings are basically empty, and the big-character poster area has become the main place to go to work.

Lu Tiehan joined the crowd reading the big-character posters in an unobtrusive manner.He is never crowded, never walks fast, and never stands still. It is best to move slowly with the wriggling crowd.As soon as he arrived at the big-character poster area, he felt that his tall and straight body was a little slack and atrophied.He found that as long as a person relaxes and restrains his face, shoulders, back and knees a little bit, he not only makes himself feel much smaller, but also immediately looks not tall in the eyes of others. At this moment, as long as he straightened his chest, raised his head, and stood with his hands behind his back, he would immediately become an eye-catching target.But now he slumped his shoulders a little, lowered his head, moved slowly with the flow of people, and was in a very normal position.He looked at the big-character posters column by column with an unobtrusive and ordinary expression, judging the situation in the country and the ministry.

He found that it was the first fluke that he didn't become a minister.The minister is the target of public criticism, and the more power he holds, the more attacks he receives.At the end of a big-character poster, there was a cartoon drawing of the minister as a poor wretch who was trampled under by the revolutionary masses.In the comics, the Minister struggled like a mouse being trampled on his back.Another lucky thing for him is that he never spoke much and gave few lectures, so he received relatively few big-character posters among several deputy ministers.There are a total of six deputy ministers in the ministry. Except for one who has been ill for many years and recuperated, the remaining four seem to have received more big-character posters than him, and their nature is more serious than him.When he read the big-character posters, he was most concerned about the fate of these ministers and deputy ministers. What he was most nervous about was that his name appeared on the big-character posters again.He has a very complicated psychology about the criticism of several other ministers and deputy ministers.They suffered a lot of big-character posters, and they were promoted to high ranks. On the one hand, he was worried and nervous, because the tide rose and all boats were knocked down, and he would not escape bad luck. As a capitalist roader, if everyone else is knocked down and counted, he may be able to pass the test easily.Therefore, when he moved a little bit in front of the big-character poster column, he felt a little relieved whenever he saw the name of a certain minister appeared on the headline of the big-character poster instead of his name.

After reading column after column of big-character posters, near the end, he found that no new big-character posters had been added from yesterday afternoon to this morning.A gust of wind blew over, and a few big-character posters that were not tightly pasted rattled, he felt the coolness on his body, and also wanted to go to the toilet to urinate.For a while, urination has become a big problem bothering him, frequent urination, unclean urination.However, in the face of so many big-character posters, the first thing is to read them. In front of the big-character poster column near the corner with less traffic, he saw a girl with a familiar face copying the big-character poster there. He recognized her at a glance as Jia Ruoxi, the middle school daughter of Minister Jia Cheng. Xiaoshuzi also saw the title of the big-character poster "Compilation of Jiacheng's Counter-revolutionary Revisionist Crime Records".There were twenty or thirty pages of large pink newspapers, listing Jia Cheng's more than fifty crimes.This big-character poster was posted the day before yesterday, and Lu Tiehan had already read it.Jia Ruoxi copied it cautiously, her eyes only moving up and down between the big-character poster and the small book in her hand. This is undoubtedly the safest way to copy.

Lu Tiehan knew that Jia Cheng had been isolated by the rebels, but he didn't know if Jia Cheng himself could see this transcription.Maybe he looked at Jia Ruoxi in a special way, the girl couldn't help turning her head to take a quick look, and then turned back again.After writing a few more words, she realized who she had just seen, turned her head to look at Lu Tiehan, lowered her eyes, and smiled politely with difficulty. Lu Tiehan knew that as her father's colleague, as an elder, he must not be silent at this time just to avoid suspicion.He looked around and saw some insignificant and unfamiliar faces, so he walked up to the girl.The girl called softly: "Uncle Lu."

He asked in a low voice, "Have you seen Dad these few days?" Jia Ruoxi nodded, and said in a low voice, "I bring him meals every day." "Can you show this to him?" Lu Tiehan asked, pointing to the big-character poster.Jia Ruoxi nodded.Lu Tiehan said: "Tell your father to pay attention to his health." Jia Ruoxi nodded.At this moment, Lu Tiehan unexpectedly discovered that next to this "crime record" there was a two-page big-character poster titled "Resolutely Draw a Line with Counter-Revolutionary Revisionist Jia Cheng", signed by Hu Xiuqin, Minister Jia's wife.Jia Ruoxi raised her eyes and took a quick look at Lu Tiehan, then at the big-character poster written by her mother, then lowered her head silently, and continued to copy her father's "Crime Record".For a while, Lu Tiehan couldn't figure out the relationship between Minister Jia's family and the political attitude of the girl in front of him, so he consciously sighed, turned around and left.For the daughter who is determined to draw a line with her father, that sigh can be understood as his condemnation and deep surprise for Jia Cheng's counter-revolutionary crime of severing himself from the people and the family.As for a daughter who sympathizes with her father, it can be understood as his helpless sympathy and sigh for the catastrophe Jiacheng suffered, as well as his helpless sympathy and love for the little girl.

When I arrived at my office on the eighth floor, my secretary Su Xiaozhong was sitting there talking to my driver, Old Qiao, for many years. Su Xiaozhong was sitting in Lu Tiehan's seat, asking Lao Qiao what was going on across the large desk.This black and lean young man who looked like a monkey grandson was taking off his shoes at this moment, put his feet on the chair in a circle, and wrote down something on the paper while asking.Seeing Lu Tiehan coming in, Su Xiaozhong immediately put his feet down, put them into his shoes, and at the same time waved to Old Qiao, saying, "Okay, let's go." Old Qiao stood up tall and thin, and turned around. With a sallow face wearing an old military cap, he glanced at Lu Tiehan hesitantly and anxiously, then turned his head to look at Su Xiaozhong, and walked away with a stooped waist and shuffled steps. At this time, Su Xiaozhong had already pulled up his shoes and stood up, took the few pages of paper he had recorded just now, left Lu Tiehan's seat, walked around the desk, and sat on the chair where the driver, Old Qiao, was sitting just now.He looked at Lu Tiehan with flickering eyes and said, "Minister Lu, you just came up?" Lu Tiehan nodded.He was impressed by this young secretary who had become one of the leaders of the rebel faction in the Ministry of Agriculture, Forestry and Animal Husbandry.Su Xiaozhong sat there short and thin, with concave eye sockets under his protruding forehead, and a pair of piercing eyes smiled politely: "Minister Lu, I am going to write a big-character poster criticizing you." Lu Tiehan sat on his seat Next, he nodded graciously, and said: "Yes, you can write whatever you want." Su Xiaozhong glanced at him again, and explained: "Minister Jia and several other vice ministers, I have posted their big-character posters, I also have to post it to you." Lu Tiehan nodded in understanding.He took out the cigarette, Su Xiaozhong reached for the matches on the table, Lu Tiehan reached for the match himself, and said, "I will do it myself." Su Xiaozhong is a graduate of an agricultural college he discovered during his inspection in Guangdong Province a few years ago.Because he was good at writing and talented, I tried every means to transfer him over.Now, he should naturally treat himself equally. The cigarette was lit, and the phone on the desk rang.Su Xiaozhong took the opportunity to smile unnaturally, and said: "Minister Lu, answer the phone, I'll go first." Lu Tiehan nodded, and picked up the phone while exhaling smoke.Hearing the other party's voice, his first reaction was that luckily he didn't spend any longer in the big-character poster area downstairs.The opponent is Mina.Seeing Su Xiaozhong closing the door behind him, he concentrated his attention and said, "It's me, Lu Tiehan." As soon as Mina heard his voice, she burst into tears on the phone, and the more she cried, the more she couldn't stop.Lu Tiehan looked at the door of the office, and waited patiently for the other party to finish crying.Mina cried for a while, and said: "You don't care about me." After saying this, she cried even more aggrieved.Lu Tiehan said: "I probably know about your situation. How are you doing now? Tell me." Mina was still crying out of breath.Lu Tiehan waited patiently for a while, and said, "It's not that I don't care about you, my situation is not good either." Hearing this, Mina quickly stopped crying, and when she heard her wiping her nose, she asked, "Did you criticize you too?" Lu Tiehan said, "Yes, there are quite a few big-character posters." Hearing Mina As she continued to sniff her nose and wipe her tears on the phone, she obviously let go of her grievances and asked with concern: "Did they hang a sign for you and parade you?" Lu Tiehan said: "That's not it." Said you were a gangster?" Mina asked.Lu Tiehan said: "Not yet, let me fight with you a few times." Mina's side was completely quiet, and she said, "I shouldn't blame you." Lu Tiehan said, "You should blame me." Mina paused for a while, and said, "Do you want to open something?" Some noses are sore because of the kindness of the other party and his own ruthlessness.Mina said again: "If I can get through it, you must get through it too, okay?" The voice was a bit like begging a child to be obedient. Lu Tiehan squinted his eyes, holding the phone, unable to speak a word.Mina said again: "We must survive." When Lu Tiehan heard Mina say "we", he knew her kindness and infatuation. "thought of.If he was still the deputy minister safely and securely, he would definitely be frightened by this kind of infatuation, and would despise him.However, because he was also in the predicament of an uncertain future, this sentence made him feel a kind of sympathetic warmth.However, even in this kind of warmth, he still has a little infatuated contempt for the other party who said "we".Mina said again: "No matter how many years, we will definitely survive." Mina's voice was far away from the crying and sadness just now, which further increased Lu Tiehan's contempt for her superficial and infatuated.Because he realized his cruelty, he felt guilty and felt the kindness of the other party even more.The combination of these contradictory psychology finally made him end the phone call calmly and with warmth towards the other party.Putting down the phone, the unreasonable question that came to mind was: Is Mina really disfigured?Can her appearance be restored in the future? At this time, he remembered that the purpose of rushing upstairs just now was to go to the toilet. When he stood in front of the urinal to urinate, the open window of the toilet allowed him to overlook the crowded poster area below. Among the colorful big-character posters, the yellow paper is the most conspicuous. With the contrast of red paper, green paper, and pink paper, strips of yellow color shine brightly in the winter sun.Looking at the thriving big-character poster area the size of a football field through the sparse bald branches, he found that his man's logo was hanging limply, and he hadn't urinated for a long time. When the fine water flowed out, he felt physical distress.At this moment, he felt once again that if a person can't excrete or urinate, it will be the greatest pain.After wandering for a while, it seemed that he had finished urinating, but he was still waiting and exerting energy.If such a problem occurs in the hydraulic engineering of the human body, it is indeed very annoying.Associated with this, the equally annoying thing is that one's own man's sign has lost erectile function for several months. Although there was no need to use it for several months, he was still very depressed as a man when he found that he had lost the function of erection no matter in his sleep or in his daytime imagination about women. .The combination of this frustration and political anxiety made him even more depressed.During these years, it was Mina's association that brought his man's function to its best.He didn't expect that at this age, he would show stronger and more durable fighting power than when he was young.He was amazed at his miraculous performance, which he knew was a sign of vitality.Inwardly he admired Mina, a petite woman, for the life force he had mobilized. Now that vitality has been lost along with the political loss.He finally shook off the few drops of urine that he had shaken off for a long time, and when he was about to close the stall, the driver, Old Qiao, came in while unbuttoning his trousers.He stood in front of the urinal and told Lu Tiehan: "Su Xiaozhong just asked me about your past life style." Lu Tiehan was slightly startled.Old Qiao took out the man's logo and said: "I didn't say anything important, don't worry. I don't think you, the deputy minister, can't be defeated." Lu Tiehan felt a little relieved by these words.However, what made him even more annoyed was that the old driver, who was about his age, ejaculated in a burst of urine.