Chapter 6 6. One shot by the computer is worth two

My wife is mine, and my son is also mine, so I have to stand up to bloody disasters.Putting on a belt, I raised my head and strode away to chase Lanlan. After running two steps, his face was blue.The fortune of the canopy was overwhelmed with thunder, and the road was not stable.When I got up and touched it, it was the electric clothes hanger that tripped me. "What are you doing?" Immediately I heard Xiao Xiao greet me from inside, and asked, "Old Guan, you have been back for so long, and you haven't noticed anything strange?" It was as if someone had slapped me on the head: "Isn't that strange? It's not necessary to see a washing machine doing a pole dance?"

It actually twisted the water pipe very shyly, and then scolded me angrily: "Look carefully, what's missing in the house?" Disturbed mind is blind, half right.Just now, my mind was full of Lanlan and Norman, and there was a warehouse of "vegetables" that were similar in shape and far from mine. I really didn't take a good look at the house. Now that I saw it, I couldn't help crying out: "Ben, what about BEN, Where's the refrigerator?" I rushed into the bathroom and looked: "Where is Guagua?" A lot of electrical appliances are gone. Could it be that today is Edison's birthday, and they took to the streets to commemorate the glorious achievements of the father of electricity?

Although I am very surprised, I am not going to ask what happened. It is very rare for a group to skip work, but I have lived with them for not a year or two. Every minute, the razor will run away from home, or the microwave oven It's not surprising that I ran back to the manufacturer for a shell replacement and plastic surgery.At this time, the camera held up its tripod impatiently and blocked me: "Old Guan, we robbed Norman's car to buy new appliances today, and now all the things in his house are our own." I fell on my back and got up again immediately.Ah San, the television set in that box, has already connected to the location team, and began broadcasting the peep show of Norman's electrical appliances live.Hey, the shooting angles are diverse, the image is clear, and the details are in place.Who is the director?Very professional.The chainsaw said casually: "Of course it is BEN. It often posts real selfies on the Internet." I am really ineffective in teaching.

The picture is a small apartment, the living room and bedroom are connected, the furniture in the room is very simple, but the taste is unique and the arrangement is very delicate.I was a little puzzled: "Norman is a rich man, and he lives in such a small room?" Qianqian looked at it leisurely, and said, "Remember the bar where you broke your fast and fought last time? This is a small house above, and Norman has often been there during this time." I was just about to ask you how you know, but on second thought, it might be BEN again.It usually goes to NASA to listen to other people's confidential meetings as a pastime when it has nothing to do. It often laughs wildly while listening, and says: "With this wisdom, it is still developing alien projects. Why don't you study how to grow potatoes and harvest radishes?" Man's daily information, of course, is a piece of cake.

Someone walks in from the TV. Oh, why does this man look like a cockroach?The recorder screamed and jumped up, and said in disgust, "Old Guan, this is the one from this morning, am I being damned? I saw him twice a day." It couldn't describe how disgusted it was, and went to the bathroom to vomit .The voice recorder in our house is an aesthete. He often runs out in the middle of the night to discuss how to dress up with the microwave oven. He always laments that the microwave oven can reshape and change the skin. It can only make an anhydrous SPA at most. The cockroach man walked to the sofa and sat down, and took out a beautiful golden box from his pocket.Too bad none of the camera angles are overhead to see what's inside the box.He could only hear him muttering to himself: "There are still two left. Soon, soon." His expression was like that of a sixteen-year-old boy seeing the lover of his dreams appearing in front of him for the first time.

I wished I could get a better look, and my face was almost stuck to the TV, which attracted Ah San's criticism: "Old Guan, you have some common sense, okay, you look so stupid." Fortunately, the cockroach man freed me, and his cell phone rang.He cautiously put the box away and picked up the phone. I heard Lan Lan's voice clearly saying softly, "Tie Fang, I took everything. What exactly does Norman want from my house?" In this world, I believe there are quite a few men who have been abandoned by their wives, but Wu Dalang is the only one I really know.Taking him as a reference point, I have always felt that I am still lucky. If you get a divorce, just get a divorce. It’s all booked, it’s a waste not to go.”

With this kind of grateful heart, I am quite calm about Lan Lan's cheating.Even now, love is stronger than hatred.After all, in this world, she is the only woman who has ever waited for me overnight.Even if she never belongs to me, I want her to be happy.For me, happiness is the fleeting twilight glow, and there is only room for me to remember it in the deep twilight, but for her, I hope it is the rising sun, with the light and heat that shines all day long. I was so sore that I spat out the recording pen, patted me and sighed: "I said Laoguan, why do you read poems in front of us all day long? Recently, the electricity bill has increased again. Let me tell you, you have to read your poems to Lan Lan!" After thinking about it carefully, it really makes sense.Is it too late to find a classic twentieth-century love letter to catch up on?Ah San suddenly "shushed" and said, "Lanlan is here."

Sure enough, it was blue.She didn't seem to like seeing that Brother Tie Fang very much, and sat far away after entering the door.Tie Fang couldn't wait to ask her: "Where are the things you brought from home?" Lan Lan was particularly haggard today, with a gloomy expression, and she kept a large travel bag beside her. Tie Fang grabbed the bag and turned it over.Throwing away a lot of old clothes, old toys, and magazines, and kept turning them upside down, the cockroach man raised his head disappointedly: "No more?" Lanlan didn't look very happy, but she still restrained herself and said, "No more, what are you doing looking through my things?"

Tie Fang squinted at her, stood up with a gloomy face, walked away to pour water, suddenly his eyes lit up, he rushed over to grab Lanlan, and pulled out a small red silk bag from her trousers pocket: "This is what?" Lanlan suddenly stood up: "Tie Fang, what do you mean?" The cockroach man had a wretched look of anticipation on his face, and he shook the bag with a snickering smile, and a slightly yellowed piece of paper fell out.He read: "The receipt of the dermatology diagnosis and treatment fee is 1,890 yuan." His face suddenly changed, and he grabbed Lan Lan: "What is this?" What is this?It's a receipt from the dermatology department.At the beginning of last year, Lanlan fell on the road and scratched a piece of her face. She didn't seek medical treatment in time and died of necrosis.It was I who went to the hospital and cut a piece of my own skin and planted it, so she didn't lose her appearance.Of course I didn't tell Lanlan that the cut piece of skin came from my buttocks.

This should be the smallest thing I can do for Lanlan.I didn't expect that she would care so much. She put the receipt carefully and carried it with her.I didn't even think that Tie Fang would care so much. Hearing what Lanlan said, he roared angrily, "Where's your own skin?" Lanlan screamed. I jumped up, lowered my head and rushed out, you bastard ugly man, dare to yell at my wife, believe it or not, I will trample you under my feet, and turn you into negative ions to make Lanlan's hair? Ah San moved very quickly, immediately tied up my legs with the power cord, and said in a good voice: "Old Guan, don't be impulsive, you have to watch the TV before you can draw conclusions." After watching?Don't let me see Lanlan being beaten, or your picture tube will be blown up, I don't care.

Fortunately, it wasn't Lanlan who was beaten, it was the cockroach man who was beaten, and it was none other than the chief strategy analysis and execution expert of our think tank, Ah BEN! It came out of nowhere, and fell from the sky with a "clang" sound. It hit the back of the head brightly, and the Yingxiang acupoint was darkly spotted. The power cord was wrapped around the neck, and the computer cover was pulled out. It is a classic of the 18th style of laptop smashing.This man is just an ugly man, how could he be worthy of it, his eyes turned white immediately, and he lay down on the ground.Ah BEN fell down on the sofa happily, acting as if he had misunderstood, as if he was just an ordinary computer that accidentally fell out from a certain corner.However, the screen it opened towards us clearly displayed: "Fuck, XP doesn't show off, treat me like DOS!" Lan Lan was still trying to scream with her eyes closed, but when she heard the movement, she stopped and looked, and suddenly became confused: "Old Guan's computer?" She picked up Ah BEN, sat on the sofa in a daze, and thought about it for a long time. Coming to a conclusion, he stretched out his toe and kicked the iron square, and muttered: "Crazy, you must have gone to my house to steal something. I will tell you what Laoguan has, and he said that Norman told me to take it." Although for this reason, she is unwilling to be rude to Norman, but when I hear these words, I still feel like drinking nectar and drinking wine. First, she said "my family"; I——this is the great affirmation given to me by the leader!My heart was full of joy, and my blood was surging.Immediately, I will stand up and sing a song "When you meet a bosom friend, you will be more energetic, and everyone will have a closer temperament"! Since Lan Lan is not completely unfeeling towards me, I still have hope.Did you hear that, she is still saying "my home", her home is my home.No matter what was still playing on TV, I called a chainsaw to follow, stepped out of the house, and embarked on the glorious thorny road of finding my wife and returning home.