Chapter 9 Eight

"You're alive again, aren't you?" "Anyway, I won't commit suicide!" "Have you thought of the consequences of this windowpane?" "I've lived so long, I haven't done anything like a cat covering a rhinoceros yet." I was irritated by his sudden attack: "You are so honest, why did you pull the rice seedlings out of the rice field and refuse to accept it?" "I can't be sure that I pulled it out. If I really know that it was my actions. I don't need Captain Cui to get angry, I will take the initiative to admit that it was my fault." He was obviously angry, took off his glasses and shook them, and put them on again. On the bridge of the nose, "Ye Tao I, we have been together for several years! Don't you understand my temperament?"

"Will Tao Yingying bear your temper in the future?" "Let's talk about pots when we make pots, and talk about bowls when we make bowls. Don't digress. We are talking about the issue of car windows now." "So you want to pay for the windowpane?" "Shouldn't it be?" "Should be! But who will pay for this thing?" I pointed to a collapsed three-story building outside the car window-judging from its bruises and bruises, it was a masterpiece of great fighting. "I can't manage this even if I want to." He shook his head again and again, "I just want to take care of myself! Clean myself up in this troubled autumn."

Perhaps it is because of his sincerity that I am particularly worried about my friend.Captain Cui has to come to the carriage to roll roll every morning.I saw that the time was approaching, and it would be meaningless to argue with him again purely rationally, so I stepped onto the seat, lifted him onto the luggage rack, and asked him again and again. back.I issued a statement to him and said: "The sovereignty of these rags belongs to me, Ye Tao, not to you, Fan Hanru. I can put it wherever I want, and no one else has the right to interfere." "Ye Tao! I really don't understand you."

"I can understand you!" I warned him solemnly, "The number one idiot, dazed, dazed, and stupid in the 20th century. It's not 'Black Yaoqi' who escorted the car!" Fan Hanru fell silent.I also don't want to add fuel to his fire, because Tao Yingying got off the car halfway, which has already given "six o'clock" a lot of mental stimulation.Unexpectedly, Captain Cui, with the roster under his arm, had just walked into our carriage, and before he could open his mouth to lecture and roll the roll, Fan Hanru spoke out loudly: "Captain Cui! I accidentally broke a piece of window glass." The captain asked the train conductor how much the glass is worth. I will compensate you according to the price!"

I choked in my heart.The inside of the car was suddenly stunned. Captain Cui went to the car window and looked, and immediately frowned his two faint eyebrows: "What a strange thing! Before you got in the car, I went to explain to you again and again that as long as you open the inner window, you will be punished as an attempt to escape! Now , the outer window was broken, obviously you have opened the inner window, what kind of behavior is this?" "The air in the carriage is too tight. Fan Hanru wanted to let everyone breathe out of good intentions..." Before I finished speaking, Captain Cui's face darkened. He parted the blue coat with both hands, and said with his hands on his hips: "Just now Because of something wrong with Fan Hanru, you guys made a fuss, and now, Fan Hanru has admitted that he broke the window glass, why are you jumping out to help?"

"Captain Cui, I want to open the car window because..." "Because of what?" Captain Cui finally grabbed the braid Fan Hanru gave him, "Because you are so reactionary and you want to escape. In the past, in the seaside labor camp, there were cadres who protected you; now, the umbrella on your head is not there. Yes. It is the revolutionary left that escorts you, and it is the revolutionary left that transforms you. Afterwards, I will follow you rightists, and I will have to reform you to be straight. Now, for the first time, I am carrying out the task of the revolutionary left to transform the reactionary right. What to use? Use tools of dictatorship!" As he spoke, he took out a pair of iron bracelets—handcuffs—from his pocket.

Fan Hanru was stunned, he argued, "Why do I need to tell you if I want to escape?" "If you confess, you will be dealt with leniently." Captain Cui said while holding the handcuffs, "If you hadn't confessed, I would have put on you the fang cuffs. This is leniency for you!" Fan Hanru was anxious: "I have no intention of running away, I..." "The broken glass window is the evidence." Captain Cui raised his face. "Such a big hole, even a monkey in the acrobatic troupe can't get through the ring of fire. What's more, I'm a human?!" Fan Hanru argued hard, his face flushed purple.

Captain Cui didn't talk too much nonsense, and skillfully handcuffed Fan Hanru's two hands together with a "click".He glanced at Fan Hanru out of the corner of his eye and said, "I went through your files one by one. Among these ghosts and monsters, your background is the most reactionary. Before your brother was liberated, he was Fan Hanjie, a war criminal who was stationed in Jinzhou. If there is a big brother, there is a little brother." " "That was my nonsense when I was 'anti-rightist', and it was really written in my file?" Fan Hanru opened his thick lips in surprise, and beads of sweat dripped from his forehead.

"What nonsense? People often put gold on their faces, and some people smear pig manure on their faces? I advise you to be more honest, otherwise, when you arrive at Hebin Farm..." Captain Cui found himself slipping out where he was going, and quickly Changed his words and said, "...No matter where you go, I will never let you go!" Captain Cui shook his blue cotton coat, gave Fan Hanru a hard look in the face, and carried the roster to other cars to roll the roll.When he opened the car door, he twisted his neck into a twist, and solemnly warned us, "I repeat, whoever dares to open the inner car window during the escorting of you will be punished like Fan Hanru."

The blue cotton coat disappeared like a huge bird's wing. The silence in the carriage was like a pool of stagnant water without ripples. Only the sound of "咔嚓咚咚——" the wheels galloped, occupying every inch of space in the carriage.Its voice was so monotonous, it added to the gloomy atmosphere in the carriage. Holding the pair of "iron bracelets" in his hands, Fan Hanru sat there panting in grief and indignation; as the train swayed from side to side, the "Red Guard" black lock hanging on the handcuffs moved back and forth on him like a weight. The wrists trembled.I sat shoulder-to-shoulder with him, and a few times thought about sarcastically sarcasm him, in order to let this idiot "learn some current affairs".But seeing his unlucky look, he swallowed back the words that rolled to the tip of his tongue.Is he really wrong?No!

"Give me a drink of water." He said. I poured a glass of water and handed it to him.He held the glass with both hands and drank it down. "My heart is burning, let me have another drink." I saw that it was inconvenient for him to drink water in handcuffs, so I raised the glass to his lips. He shook his head: "I'm not used to asking others to feed me!" I had to hand him the water glass—his obstinacy was irresistible. "It's not bad, try wearing a 'bracelet'." Fan Hanru smiled bitterly, "In the past, when I saw prisoners wearing handcuffs in movies, I always thought that their wrists must be very painful; in fact, besides calling you Apart from the inconvenient movement, there is no special feeling." I glared at him dissatisfied: "Then you should try your best to change to a pair of mace handcuffs, and taste it!" As if recalling something, he blinked and said, "Tao Yingying seems to have worn that thing before." "How did you see that?" "That day, I went to help their 'female number' check chicken plague. When she gave injections to sick chickens, I seemed to see a small round hole on her wrist. Ye Tao! She can bear it, my majestic man, not to mention There's nothing to be afraid of." His expression seemed more calm. "Why don't you think about it and try not to wear handcuffs?" I looked at him reproachfully. "Ye Tao! Is this up to me?" "You asked for it just now." I said angrily. "I admit." "Then change your temper!" "I don't want to change." "You deserve it!" I turned my face away. Seeing that I was angry, he poked me with his elbow and whispered to me apologetically, "I know you're doing it for my own good! But I'm a man... with this virtue, I'll be reformed for another twenty years." Thirty years, until the graves are piled up on me, I, Fan Hanru, will not get much better. Brother! If I make you angry, please forgive me; don't forget, we are living through the famine Friends in need!" I didn't look back, but my heart was beating fast. "Brother! Your heart is really so hard, do you still want me, a man in handcuffs, to bow to you and apologize?" I remained motionless, but the emotional dams were beginning to burst. "Both of us belong to the rooster. Brother! It was July 14th of that year. We faced a bright moon..." "Stop it!" I turned around abruptly. He smiled silly at me. The corners of my eyes are wet. "I'm sorry for you." "You are worthy of life." "You're not mad at me anymore?" "I'm not angry at all." "Then you can help me! Wearing this thing, I can't wear clothes. I'm a little cold, please put your fur coat on me!" Only then did I realize that Fan Hanru was only wearing a thin fleece.A person who has just recovered from a fever can easily cause other diseases in an unheated compartment.I hastily pulled my torn leather jacket out of the seat, when I suddenly saw Tao Yingying's half-length woolen coat.I thought that although this woolen coat was thinner than my fur coat, it was Tao Yingying's. For Fan Hanru, wearing it would increase his heat even more, so I pulled it out from the seat; With a bang, something slipped out of the pocket of the mud coat.I bent down to pick it up and saw that it was a boat made of white paper. "Look!" Fan Hanru's eyes straightened: "How can she still have such a childlike innocence? How strange!" "No wonder," I said, "I reckon this is a letter for you." Suspiciously, he dismantled the "paper boat", and on the back of several blank sheets of paper, there were densely written words: Comrade Han Confucianism: Now I can call you that, because I have served my sentence and am considered a half-citizen by the rules. I am very inferior, especially in front of you.Although I'm in the "female number", tens of miles away from you, but I know a lot about you.Captain Tian is a well-cultivated labor reform cadre. When she educated us, she often cited your example in the chicken farm, so I got to know you.As for how Captain Tian knows you so well, I can't ask.According to her, in the famine era, you would rather cook vegetables to eat than move an egg from the farm.This alone shows that you are a person with great perseverance.We female prisoners should be more self-respecting than men. No, in those years, they ate everything. When working in the vineyard, they stuffed unripe sour grapes into their mouths; even green peaches that had just been sprayed with pesticides. , they also do not hesitate.I am a prison doctor, and I often work day and night to rescue these women who have lost their reason due to famine.Captain Tian also told us: You are as innocent as water, and the four eggs you took out of the rat hole were handed over to the police. To be honest, at the bottom of this society, hearing these things is as novel to me as listening to fairy tales.Explained in terms of physics: "Once a substance is subjected to excessive pressure, there is nothing that does not break or deform. Which rare substance do you belong to-I often think so. Remember, once you were working as a chicken farmer in the headquarters Our "female number" sent a representative to attend the report. That was the first time I saw you. It was midsummer, and you were barefoot and wearing a lotus-leaf-shaped straw hat, probably because the weather was too hot. You took off the straw hat and used it as a fan, so I could see the features of your face. Your forehead is so big that I can't help but think of Lenin in the movie. Of course, such a metaphor is very inappropriate, but that is my true feeling. I can't find a better metaphor, so I have to do it this way! "I...I can't read it anymore, this is written for you alone!" I looked away from the letter paper in embarrassment. Fan Hanru grabbed me with his handcuffed hands: "Just now you shared my pain, now you are entitled to share my happiness." "The letter is about to appear... hot words appear, and you are alone..." I stood up. "Brother! You are someone who has experienced it. If you are a staff officer, you will be the end! You have to help me make more decisions!" I had to sit down again. Fan Hanru continued to read in a low voice. Later, when you came to the chicken farm of our "female number", I was very excited and seemed to have a lot to say to you, but I couldn't reveal anything to you.Because I measured myself with the ruler in my heart, there is a long distance between us; and these distances are mountains that are difficult to climb; it is a rapid that is difficult to cross even with a boat.But at this time, you spoke to me beside the barren ancient road.My heart was so disturbed, really, to this day I can't remember how I answered you; my heart kept beating until we parted... Remember that rice field storm?Your captain reprimanded you, and I felt worse hearing it than reprimanding me.Why?I have no idea!Did I have a feeling for you... I don't know, but I got up suddenly and did the job.That day, our "female number" came back from work in the rain. As soon as I changed into clean clothes, Captain Tian pushed open the door of the infirmary and walked in.She asked me: "Tao Yingying! Did you really pull out the seedlings in the grass?" I was hesitant because I didn't know why she was so anxious to ask about this matter.I wanted to lie to her, but her eyes were sincere (she has always been very concerned about me), and I immediately swallowed the lie and spit out the truth: "No, it's not." "Then why do you say yes Did you pull it out?" she asked.I said: "Captain Tian! I can't explain why? I just think that such a person should not be punished. I... I was too reckless, and I will never make such a mistake again in the future. You can criticize it.!" I lowered my head, waiting for her criticism; but after waiting for a long time, there was no movement.When I looked up, I didn't know when she had left the infirmary.really weird! I was always in a state of anxiety.She didn't tell me until the day I was released from prison that she didn't condemn my reckless behavior; on the contrary, she thought that I hadn't lost my conscience as a person-even though I was a female prisoner serving my sentence at the time!I vaguely knew from her mouth that the reason why your captain was dismissed and became an administrator was the result of her going to the field department to file a complaint.A few days ago, she brought me to the team office again, and I waited for her to assign tasks, but she never spoke. I asked: "Captain Tian! Do you have anything to do?" "It's okay, let's go!" I had just stepped out of the house when she called me again: "you come back!" I stood in front of her desk again: "What's wrong with you today?" "In a few days, you may have to leave the land where you have served your sentence!" Her voice was very soft. "Where are you going?" I said immediately, "I don't want to go, I'm familiar with this team. You have helped me a lot over the years!" "It's not something that can keep you here through artificial efforts." She had a melancholy look on her face, "Before I leave, do you have anything to say?" I sadly said: "Thank you for teaching me for many years, I am a sinner." "That's not what I need to hear." She looked into my eyes. "I want to hear your thoughts on the future, such as: personal life issues, you are still a girl!" "I have no idea, I just want to support myself..." "Tao Yingying, this is not the truth! What happened in the rice field, I, the captain, am not blind..." I was confused: "Captain Tian, ​​I..." "You have good eyesight, you can tell the difference between loess and cinnabar." She smiled thoughtfully, "Now, I can tell you, my wife is the captain of their men's team, if you really treat him... Before Shanxi, I could give Fan Hanru a letter through my lover. Fan Hanru is an honest person...Of course, I can't vouch for whether Fan Hanru will forgive you for the mistake you made....Look, I am the captain , to meddle in your private affairs!" "I...I...I..." I didn't finish a sentence. "This is your freedom. I'm just asking you." She explained, "Because they are also going to Shanxi. There are more than 20 labor camps in Shanxi. I don't know where you will be assigned. Of course, it would be better if you can go to one place. If you are far away, it will be difficult to meet again, so let me ask you in advance. Do you understand?"—— "Understood." My heart pounded into my throat, "Captain Tian! I thank you very much. My parents have severed ties with me, you..." "Go back and think about it, and give me an answer tomorrow! Remember, this is your freedom. Don't submit to me just because I am the captain. Our conversation today is completely equal." I went back to the dormitory of the employees and lost sleep that night!Comrade Han Ru, I am not considering whether I want to or not, but I am considering that I should not establish that kind of relationship with you.I am a sinful person, and although you are a "rightist", your quality is watery and transparent... Before I was allowed to answer Captain Tian, ​​the date of departure to Shanxi was advanced.I packed my things in a hurry, got on the truck in a hurry, and boarded the train in a hurry.Oh my God!It was your captain who came to Shanxi with us in the same car!My heart is really shuddering!It's not bad, he didn't recognize that I was the female prisoner who interfered with his anger at you in the rice field!Because I am a "doctor", I was placed in the No. 9 car, which is a special train for escorts, and it is not as crowded as other cars.I wrote this letter to you while leaning on the small table before any patients came to see me.Please forgive me for the crooked writing because the train kept swinging.After I finish writing the letter, I want to take the opportunity of making my rounds in the carriage to hand it over to you.But I can't guarantee that I can have such great courage—because reason always echoes in my ears: Impossible!impossible!impossible!But I couldn't restrain myself emotionally, so I had to put all my eggs in one basket and obey God's arrangement! I wish Dong An Tao Yingying, in carriage No. 9 If fate makes us go south and go north, please find a way to write me back, because we can always find out where our women's team is going.I am waiting!I look forward to it! ——Tao Yingying and ………… We were relatively silent for a long time, and the partners around us were all silent.People, at the most exciting moment, often appear silent, but now, the carriage is immersed in this kind of silence.After a while, the uproar suddenly broke out in the carriage: "'Six o'clock', you are a god of good fortune!" "She is as transparent as her name!" "This dress was left for you intentionally by her!" "This is really the grass in the desert, the lyric poem on the suffering land!" "Bless you! Unlucky Fan Hanru!" "I wish you all the best in the future!" "..." Fan Hanru clumsily folded the letters with his handcuffed hands. He wanted to fold them into a boat, but his trembling fingers refused to listen to his instructions.I took it, followed the creases left on the letter paper, and folded it into its original shape—a boat with bulging sails. He held it in his hand and stared at it intently. Not wanting to disturb his thoughts, I closed my eyes. "Ye Tao! Don't sleep. There is a river outside the window!" he said. "That's Fenhe!" I replied with my eyes closed. "Where does it go?" "Accompany our train to the Yellow River!" "If you put this boat in the river..." "Dude! Can't you see the river bed is starting to freeze?" "Then it drifted nowhere near its end?" "Where does it end? Here—" I opened my eyes and pointed to his heart, "this is where it belongs!" "No, it should flow into the Yellow River. It is vast and mighty, and this sail should form a fleet with us to open up a new life. The Yellow River is the cradle of our great nation. You, me, and she should all be worthy of us Glorious ancestor." His expression was extremely excited, his eyes sparkling behind the lens, "Ye Tao! Just now, 'Reminding Saburo' didn't inadvertently say, what is the place we are going to... what riverside farm? From If we analyze the word 'hebin', it must be close to the Yellow River. "