Chapter 7 Chapter Six

I didn't sleep all night. In the middle of the night, the sound of dripping raindrops sounded outside the window.After a while, the raindrops became more and more dense.Loud noises were heard from the fields and roofs, and the eaves of the adobe houses shook the quiet darkness like a waterfall.The darkness was flying all over the world, as if an extremely majestic fetish had spread its black wings to bring the king to this world.I quietly felt fear, and the habitual sense of disaster made me think that I would be punished again.So, I put aside the chaotic thoughts in my heart, and didn't think about... her.The rain fell in the early morning and stopped suddenly.Come in a hurry, go abruptly.A lone rooster crowed sadly on the other side of the ditch, and the water droplets in front of the eaves beat the puddle lonely.

After the restless passions had died down, I began to seek, in moral self-satisfaction, spiritually what I had not obtained physically.Woman, her curtains are being lifted layer by layer before me.Now the last layer is revealed.If this final curtain is lifted, women will no longer be mysterious.And anything without mystery is prosaic.Therefore, it can be said that at this time, my perception of women is just right.The hazy state allows me to develop my imagination, and I can make romantic stories about it... I found that I was actually just a person who indulged in fantasy and was good at making up stories. Although I could cope with all kinds of hardships that reality gave me, I lacked the spirit of initiative and enterprising.

I also found that the function of civilization is not so much to direct one's own behavior as to explain one's own.I didn't do that, and I could quite reasonably imagine myself being tall.But if I did that, I could just as well explain it rationally, and not only would I forgive myself, but I would almost think it was the act of a strong man. Its daybreak.Gray shock seeps through the stained glass.Prisoners in the labor camp are still fast asleep.I sighed deeply: people with thinking ability live by thinking, people without thinking ability live by instinct, but instinct makes people strong, but thinking makes people weak.

In fact, in this world, thinking and not thinking are all the same!I tried to roll over and sit up, but fell asleep. The next day, the brigade went to work as usual.The night of heavy rain did not leave many traces on the sandy soil of the Loess Plateau, except for the natural runoff washed out by the rain on the slope of the dam.Of course, the rice fields, reeds, and swamps became vast oceans, and when the blackened green aquatic plants swayed in the wind, white spray could be seen everywhere through the swaying branches and leaves.This kind of foam can only be lifted by strong winds and heavy rains.The air was extremely humid, and there seemed to be a hint of rain in the wind.The trunks of brown willows and jujubes are darker in color, while the trunks of poplars are shining like silver.Many toads squatted on the field ridges and dirt roads, and many frogs hid in the grass, like victims of floods, at a loss.But there is no mud on the dirt road, and the field ridge is also solid and feasible.The labor reform brigade still came along this dirt road.

As soon as it was dawn, our field management staff got up and went down to the field with a shovel to check the fields we were in charge of.Did the heavy rain wash away the drain and water inlet?Has the ridge been washed away?But I was wandering around the fields I managed in a daze, not knowing what to do.The mouth is bitter and astringent, and the stomach does not feel hungry.Seeing the place where I entered and exited yesterday, the reeds were divided into two sides.It was like a gap in a high wall.This gap caused in me waves of joy, sorrow, and confusion. After I finished the inspection, I went back to the adobe house for breakfast, and on the way, I met a large group of people pulling weeds in the fields.

"The night is dark and rainy, and the day is sunny, so angry that the labor camp prisoners have stomachaches!" A pointy-nosed prisoner passed me whining in a rhyming jingle.Yes, it would be nice if it continued during the day, so that the prisoner could sleep in the cell all day with his head covered. But although the sky was still overcast, there was no rain.Although there were frequent accidents in the reform-through-labour team, there was never any luck.As a reform-through-labor prisoner, it is best not to have any illusions about life; I have illusions, and that is why I suffer.

There is no love here, only physical lust... The men's team walked by.later.The women's team followed from afar.I now know who I'm waiting for; I suddenly experience a thrill I haven't experienced in years. The air was gray, and the grass and water droplets by the canal were dull and lifeless.However, all of this is radiant because of being able to see her. The female prisoners walking in front all stared at me curiously, and did not turn their heads away until they passed by me.She was last.Behind her is the "squad leader" carrying a gun.She holds a sickle in her hand.This is used to mow the grass. On the edge of the field where the grass is too dense, simply use a sickle to cut it. Anyway, there will be no rice seedlings there.

I gaze into her eyes.There was a mocking smile in her eyes, but also a very kind look that seemed to be familiar to me.We greeted each other with winks: "Good morning!" "Hello!" "Are you full this morning?" "It's okay!"... She had a radiant face, and there was no trace of shame in that face, so I blushed instead.Although she is also wearing the same black prison uniform as others, with no collar and patch pockets, just like a straight flour sack; the fat sleeves flutter back and forth with the woman's slender arms, but in my eyes she seems Still naked, still as beautiful as yesterday.

However, the moment she came to me and was about to pass me by, she suddenly raised the sickle in her hand, shook it in front of my face, and at the same time burst out in a voice that only I could hear clearly. Such a harsh sentence: "I can't wait to kill you!" Before I could react, she walked away without looking back.The "squad leader" who followed her mumbled something and walked past me. A gun barrel glowed faintly blue. I waited for a long time, waiting for such a sentence.Those silent words we communicated with our eyes are all my own imagination! After breakfast, I sat blankly on the canal dam.The wind tore apart the leaden clouds, and in the distance, on the edge of the sky, an orange-yellow sun appeared.The fellow Zhuangzi started to move, and there was the sound of lazily yelling to drive the cattle.A skinny bay red horse ran out of the circle, stopped suddenly in the yellow radish field, raised its head, and sniffed something in the wind with its nose.The water soaked up to my calf.There was a slight murmur of the water, with a melancholy and loving tone.I suddenly shed tears of grievance.I felt that I was hurt, and she was hurt, but I couldn't tell where it hurt.

After that, I never saw her again in the labor camp.More than 3,000 mu of rice fields, more than 1,000 people have been harvested in two days.On the third day, the brigade moved to the paddy field area north of the field. When the rice was ripe and our field management team was transferred back to the brigade, the women's team had already moved to another station, and we didn't even have the chance to meet by the roadside. .I only got her name. Her name is Huang Xiangjiu.