Chapter 4 Lonely

1 Loneliness comes from love, and a person without love will not be lonely. Perhaps solitude is love's most meaningful gift. The recipient of this gift learns to love himself, and also learns to understand other lonely souls and the deep love hidden in them.Thus building a precious spiritual world for oneself. 2 Loneliness is the fate of human beings. It is based on the fact that each of us is an accidental existence in this world, coming from nothing and going back to nothing. No one or anything can change us. of this fate.Yes, not even love.Anyone who understands such a fundamental loneliness in life has already stood above all human loves, and will not be a slave to love when it is most passionate.

3 When I'm with other people, I yearn for solitude.When I am lonely, I yearn to see my kind again.But after all, loneliness can only be relieved by people who love and know each other. The rest of the people disturb the loneliness, but make people feel more lonely, just like a sense that is more aware of its own existence because it is stimulated. The solitude and noise were unbearable.If I have to endure, I would rather choose to be alone. 4 Every festival, alone under the lamp, there is a very strong loneliness in my heart, so strong that I can't get rid of it, I drink the wine of life by myself, don't get drunk.

Life as a process is always passing away, it seems that any kind of living method is the same.But it's just different.I need a kind of inner tranquility, so that I can receive and sort out all external impressions with ease.In this way, I feel that I have a kind of continuity and integrity.When I am disturbed by too much external life, I am broken, broken, and thus lose the ability to absorb external impressions. The world is my food.Humans spend only a small amount of time eating and most of the time digesting.Being alone is me digesting the world. 5 Between quietness and noise, solitude and gregariousness, there must be a ratio or rhythm that suits me.If the proportions are out of balance and the rhythm is out of order, I will be sick -- too quiet and depressed, too loud and irritable.Depression makes me a poet, restlessness makes me a philistine.

6 A spiritually self-sufficient person will not envy the good luck of others, especially the good luck of imbecile children. 7 Which life is better, activity or contemplation? Sometimes I crave activity, roaming, association, romance, adventure, success.It would be a pity to pass away without fully exploring the possibilities of life.But I know that my nature is better suited to a contemplative life.I have to rest my self-sufficient mind. Only when I move with this mind can I feel at ease and gain something. What's the fun in feasting every day if you don't have a good appetite?What's the point of traveling around the world if you don't have good sensibility?Conversely, how can a person who eats banquets every day have a good appetite, and how can a person who travels frequently around the world have a good sensibility?

The mind, like the stomach, needs rest and recovery.Solitude and contemplation are ways of resting the soul.When the mind is full from rest, and hungry from inactivity, it tastes most keenly for new impressions. So, the question is not one of the two.Both high-quality activity and high-quality tranquility are needed, and the latter is a prerequisite for the former. 8 People with extraverted personalities tend to have many friends, but true friends are always few.Introverts are lonely, and when they get friends, that's often true. 9 A talkative person can't stand loneliness because he needs an audience.A man of few words also needs an audience, but most of this audience is himself, so he is more content with being alone.

10 Some people can only recognize his self in the boiling communication.Some people can only recognize his white self in quiet solitude. 11 How terrible it is to have no place to live alone, everything is laid bare.In groups, people have to cover up and suppress their individuality.Under the gaze of others, who can sit there and meditate peacefully, capture and record their own subtle feelings.The housing crisis leads to an ecological crisis in poetry and philosophy. 12 Learn to be alone, learn to talk to yourself, learn to listen to yourself--that's how to learn to be profound.Of course, the premise is: if loneliness can be learned.

13 Gaining understanding is one of life's great joys.Yet a man who strives to understand, and who suffers without the understanding of others, is a poor wretch. 14 Being understood is lucky, but not being understood is not necessarily unlucky.A person who places his worth entirely on the understanding of others is often worthless. 15 Understanding or not understanding between people is fate, but misunderstanding is a trick of fate.I accept fate frankly, but feel sad for the teasing of fate. But why confess?Confession is the death certificate of understanding. 16 People who know the value of pain will not easily reveal and show their pain to others, even the closest ones.

17 How is it possible to be a maverick without being alone?Yet, despite being doomed, loneliness can still feel terrible and unbearable.God gave him a unique soul, but endowed him with the same need for warmth in the world as ordinary people, which is where the tragedy lies. 18 After all, in this world, whose experience is not ordinary and ordinary?It is the disparity in the course of the soul that creates the chasm between people. 19 Boredom, loneliness, and loneliness are three different states of mind. Boredom is the desire to lose oneself in others, it seeks diversion.Loneliness is the desire to be with others, and what it seeks is ordinary human warmth.Solitude is the desire to accept the other into the self, it seeks understanding.

The bored are self-loathing, the lonely are self-pitying, and the lonely are self-sufficient. The mediocre is boring, the genius is lonely, everyone has lonely time. Boredom is comic, loneliness is tragic, and loneliness is neutral. Boredom belongs to the biological man, loneliness belongs to the social man, and loneliness belongs to the metaphysical man. 20 Loneliness of mind and loneliness of character are two different things.Loneliness belongs to the weak, loneliness belongs to the strong.Both are out of gregariousness, but the former out of fear of being hurt, the latter out of mental superiority.

twenty one Loneliness is a situation that determines a person's fate.A person can't stand loneliness, so he seeks convenient ways to get rid of it, go to meet friends, chat, play cards, watch TV, and he becomes a mediocre person.Those who overcome loneliness by inner strength must be poets and philosophers. twenty two I get bored hearing the same insights and exclamations from others all the time.But I know that in the eyes of others, I may be even more boring. They can’t even hear insights and exclamations from me. I don’t want to repeat, and I can’t come up with new ones, so I just give them silence.It's weird to share silence with people, so I hid...

twenty three I'm not social by nature.On most occasions, I either find the other person boring or fear that the other person thinks I'm boring.But I don't want to put up with the boringness of the other person, nor do I want to try to make myself interesting, that's too tiring.I am most relaxed when I am alone, because I don't feel that I am boring, and even if I am boring, I can bear it by myself, and I don't involve others, and I don't need to feel uneasy. twenty four All communication has a final limit that cannot be surpassed.Between two people, this boundary is not clear, yet it is certain.All troubles and conflicts arise from unintentional attempts to breach this boundary.However, once this boundary is clearly discernible and strictly observed, then all the charm of the relationship is lost, and the emotion is out of the game, and the reason maintains order. 25 In any communication between two people, there must be an ideal distance suitable for the degree of mutual fit, beyond which distance will cause mutual repulsion and resentment.This applies to love as much as to friendship. Perhaps a slightly greater outward distance between two people than their inner distance maximizes the emotional attraction between them.Form should lag slightly behind content.In fact, they are not like-minded people. If they are inseparable, they will inevitably hate each other. 26 Love can soothe loneliness, but it cannot and should not eliminate it.If love tries to eliminate loneliness in vain, it will lose its sense of proportion and go to the opposite. A sense of proportion is a sign of mature love. It knows how to observe the necessary distance between people. This distance means respect for the other person as an independent personality, including respect for the other person's right to be alone. 27 This is a lonely person.One day, many lonely people in the world discovered his loneliness and rushed to make friends with him.He was confused: because of my loneliness, they believed that I was their friend. I have so many friends, and I am no longer lonely. How can I still be qualified to be their friend? 28 You surround him and applaud him, and he panics.How do you know the low self-esteem in his heart, his achievements are only made for himself to see, and he never expected to alarm you. 29 "If you were exiled to Mars, and you were the only one, and the water was far from being able to return to the earth to contact humans, and at the same time make you immortal, what would you do then?" "writing." "What if there is no hope of your writing ever being read?" "Suicide." 30 I believe that an excellent soul, even if it is always lonely and never understood, can still get a kind of satisfaction from its own enrichment, which is self-sufficient in a certain sense.However, the premise is the existence of human beings and human spirit, and the basic value of human spirit is affirmed.Only by being among human beings can you uphold your belief in the spiritual value of human beings, and thus be spiritually fulfilled and self-sufficient.The self-love of an excellent soul actually stems from the universal love of the human spirit.No matter how good a soul is, it will be difficult for it to be separated from the human spirit forever, if it is thrown into no man's land or even among barbaric tribes, where there is no hope of survival, and there is no possibility of returning ideas and works to the world. Self-sufficient. 31 The lonely must be out of season.However, everything can be trendy, including solitude. 32 Language is the home of being.Silence is the home of language.The babbler kills silence, corrupts language, and commits a double sin.