Chapter 22 How to die

"All men are mortal", this adage is probably true, because we have never seen an immortal person, although books have said that there are such things, or immortals, or "Ziteluerbuluge" (Strulbrug), it doesn't matter much.However, since we have not seen it with our own eyes, and all the meditation buddies in the Beijing Academy left their futons and went down the mountain, refusing to give ordinary people the opportunity to witness the ascension, as of the publication of this manuscript, I have to temporarily admit the above-mentioned adage to regard death as the last part of life, as love is the middle part--of course, the two sometimes go together, but this still does not break the principle, if we do not believe in the afterlife. And love life.In short, since everyone has a share in death, the law can also be obtained and discussed.

According to statistics, there are two categories of death methods in the world, one is "end of life", and the other is "death by accident".The end of life can be divided into three parts.One is maturity, that is, when the vulgar cloud is exhausted, it is mostly "happy mourning", because this kind of ending is nothing but eighty or ninety-year-old old ladies and old ladies, and they must live together for four generations at this time. There were one or two hundred men and women, big and small, in the family, and it was a bit overwhelming, so his vacancy was naturally very welcome.The second is sudden death, a certain mechanism breaks down and suddenly stops, just like the clockwork is broken, it is not much different from breaking the sky, but because it belongs to internal medicine, there is no trace on the outside. Therefore, it is also included in the sleeping department.The third is the death of an illness. It seems to be very kind, but in fact it is mostly the fault of Mr. "Bacteria", who used all kinds of vicious means to murder "Ant Life". It was a long-term torture, comparable to that of "Dongchang", it was really terrible.All in all, having one or two is not a big deal, but long life is a matter of luck, and wishing for a heart attack is no different from seeking immortality. The fate of most people is only their turn to die of illness.The intentions of Kui and us to avoid suffering and seek happiness are quite different. Therefore, if we want to get a good way of death, we have to leave the end of life and seek an unexpected death.

The advantage of Feiming lies in his suddenness, he was clearly alive a quarter of an hour ago, and died straight a quarter of an hour later, even if there is pain (I don't really believe it), it is only this moment, this is his unique style the benefits of.However, this cannot be generalized.The cross is said to be the instrument of torture used by Rome to deal with slaves. They nailed him on a rack and let him starve to death or die of exhaustion. It can last for a few days. Afterwards, there were still some sporadic crumbs left, and I felt that it was not very good.Chebianjin was originally very neat, a privilege of foreign aristocrats, and welcomed by Chinese heroes, but the solitary head is a watermelon, or "pump", as a friend saw in Changsha, which seems inelegant, because One's body is so out of shape.Swallowing gold and drinking salt bittern is unavoidably a bit feminine, and eating opium will greatly damage your reputation, and you will be called a smoker, even if you have never had an "indissoluble bond with Furong City Lord" during your lifetime.Huaisha sinks, there is Doctor Qu in the front, and there is... He is quite heroic, but he is afraid of soaking for too long, but he is not loved by fish and turtles, like the "fat sea" that cures coughs, very little humor, Hanging is said to be very comfortable. (Note: This is just a rumor. I cannot guarantee whether it is true or not.) Takero Arishima and Akiko Hatano died in this way. A Japanese literati once half-seriously and half-jokingly argued that everyone should commit suicide. They all use this method, but according to my opinion, there are also serious problems.What book says that there is a poem written by a ghost descending from a ghost,

Eyes like fish eyes are open at all times, The body hangs like a banner all day long. (I can’t remember clearly, waiting for further research; it seems that these two sentences are too incomprehensible, and I’m afraid it was done by an unqualified scholar.) I also heard that thieves were punished in ancient England, so I let him hang on the rack, and sometimes the wind blew The joints are ringing, (these words are of course unbelievable, because thieves are not all collarbone, but "heard" so, I can't definitely object,) although a bit Lord Dunsany (Lord Dunsany) ) The flavor of the novel always seems to be too weird -- a little too much.After much deliberation, it was not very good, so I finally thought of shooting.Shooting, this can always be regarded as the most ideal way of death in modern civilization.It is actually the same as the Zhangba Snake Spear, but it is more civilized, that is to say, more convenient. It does not need to be Zhang Yide to use it, and it is used so widely and frequently: to drill a hole in the body, put the inside If the mechanism is broken a bit, some red water like dandelion white juice will flow out, and the matter will be over, you see how simple it is.Simplicity is well-being, which is far better than any disease.On March 18, Hu Xijuejun, a Chinese and French university student, was murdered in the Consulate General. When the memorial service was held in the school, I sent a couplet, which said:

What kind of world still talks about patriotism? Such a way of death is worthy of immortality! This last couplet is really my heartfelt tribute.If there is a fly in the ointment, it is that the bullet is too big, and a piece of flesh is torn off, which is a little eye-catching. If you can invent something like iron sand for bird hunting, which looks like a trace of a thick copper wire, it will be even more perfect. .I think this kind of invention will probably not be very difficult and time-consuming. When it is successful, the "death drive" that Dr. Metchnikoff (Metchnikoff) who drank yoghurt said must have developed, then it will be true at that time. It can be said that "combination is double beauty".

I may have been inspired by Shiki Masaoka's haiku "After Death" when I wrote this article, but the words and meanings here are all my own.Also, some of the above mentioned are jokes, some are not, and the statement is merged. May 15 In this case, the said haiku "After Death" has been translated by Mr. Zhang Fengju and published in the sixth issue of "Shen Zhong". Re-record when editing and schooling in August of the 16th year (Completed in May 1926, from "Alisma Collection")