Chapter 6 computer humor

I have long been used to computer writing.Words, phrases or commonly used short sentences can be typed out in quick succession.Over time, it became difficult to use the pen.But the computer sometimes joked with me, making me dumbfounded. I wanted to type the word "calmly" in conjunction with it, but it actually showed "stealing".I suspected that I had made a mistake, but I repeated it many times, and it was still "stealing".Later, the software was upgraded, and there were only two words displayed, one was "calm" and the other was "stealing".Anyway, "calm" and "stealing" became twin brothers.I can't help thinking about the burglary of the office in the early years.When I opened the office early in the morning, I found it was a mess, and I immediately realized that there was an unexpected visitor last night.I immediately protected the scene and called the police.After a while, people from the Public Security Bureau came. When they saw this scene, they said it was a habit of stealing.You see, the whole section of soot fell on the floor and on the table, which shows that the thief worked very "calmly", picking the lock while holding a cigarette, and maybe even humming a little tune!Indeed, "stealing" is becoming more and more "calmly" nowadays. Small thieves enter the house "calmly", and big thieves "calmly" snatch people's blood and sweat.Even if it is a new version of software, isn't "calmness" also ranked ahead of "stealing"?

I wanted to call "problems", but what I showed was "praise", and horses and bulls do not attract each other.But if you think about it carefully, there seems to be some intriguing connection between them.It is not uncommon for people with "flaws" to receive "commendations", but those who really have no "faults" often do not get "compliments" and may even suffer.I think the people who designed the coding program didn't think so much, but they just inadvertently reminded some laws of life.Is there really some kind of chaotic god looking down on the common people in the dark?What is even more frightening is that some world-renowned people have not only "faults" but "serious illnesses" all over their bodies.

Every time I type "capital", I always type the word "sauce".I think "capital" is the most common word, and it should be able to be typed repeatedly, but the computer always associates it with "sauce".I couldn't help but think of Mr. Bo Yang's metaphor of calling China a sauce jar.This is very embarrassing to the Chinese people, but very appropriate irony.Thinking about this "capital" again, it is really a good thing, but it does have the taste of "sauce jar".Many people who deal with "capital" seem to have fallen into a "sauce jar" and become dirty after a while.The fastest way to make money in these years is the so-called "capital" operation. Empty hands and white wolves can become rich.The so-called stock market in China's majestic "capital" market can be said to be a big "sauce jar", with many chubby white maggots crawling in the black "sauce paste".

Sometimes the words I want to type are wrong, but they make sense.For example, if I type "content", it shows "accountant". "Content" may require an "accountant" to calculate.It also compares me to "survive", which shows "bottom-up".After the software is upgraded, two words are also displayed at the same time, one is "bottom-up" and the other is "survival".This also makes sense, the process of people seeking "survival" is always "bottom-up".The so-called people go to high places, water flows to low places.But some people's "bottom-up" process is a process of flattery, bragging, flattering, playing around the wind... In short, it is an annoying process.

After typing "complaint", two words appeared on the screen: one was "street" and the other was "complaint". "Street" is actually still in front of "complaint".Unintentionally, the computer deciphered a certain Chinese tradition.It stands to reason that in ancient times it was the Yamen to sue, but in the new society it is the court.However, China's "complaint" has been related to "street" since ancient times.In the old days, if corrupt officials were in power, the yamen would be open, and no one could come in without money.The common people have been wronged, shouting that the sky should not answer, and the earth is not working, so they have to wait for the Lord Qingtian to come up, go to the street to shout, and kneel down to block the sedan chair.Times are different now, kneeling and blocking the sedan chair will definitely not work.The cars of the officials are driving fast, be careful not to run over you!If it is a larger official traveling, the police car roars, and the policeman shouts, even if you try your best to hit the car, you will not be able to escape.So, what about going to court?The common people are not at ease in their hearts.It's all the fault of someone who made up a jingle: the judge's hat is turned upside down, and he eats the plaintiff and the defendant.The common people still believe in the government in the end, so they always go to the gate of the government to cry for grievances.Which level of government does not block petitioners all day long?It's just that the government didn't move to the deep mountains and old forests, and always guarded the "street" key points, and there are always places for ordinary people to "complain".

I've come across a lot of humor like this.The most ironic thing is that when I type "call", what appears in front of me is "losing"; when I type "law", what appears is "corruption".As a result, "the voice of the masses" has become "the masses suffer", and "administration according to law" has become "corrupt administration". It often happens that "the masses suffer" and those who have the courage to reflect the "voice of the masses" often also "suffer".Most of the conscientious writers, journalists or other intellectuals I know are in a bad situation and are always "losing money" because they express the "voice of the masses."And some people who shout "administration according to law" every day are actually "corrupting administration".A lot of things are done under the guise of the law, so "law" and "corruption" sometimes really make people confused who is who.