Chapter 20 ideals of the past

I love drama, at least I love to say so. For a while, I told people everywhere: I want to be a drama director.I don't know what it means to be a theater director, I just love to say it. That was about shortly after I saw the play "No Place To Die".Sartre's script, 1997, in Beijing.After reading it, my heart as a literary young woman could not be calm for a long time, and my outlook on life has undergone major changes.Before, I thought it would be pretty good to be a female clerk in an institution, but after that, I thought what a female clerk was, and I wanted to be a drama director.

I like the smallness of a drama theater, the compactness, warmth and a little sense of oppression where actors and audience can hear each other's breathing, how different this is from a movie theater.The movie theater is so big, the hearts of the people are distracted, and there is a screen between the actors and the audience.I also like that dramas don't have fancy stunts, complicated cuts, and all those impurities that mediocre directors can hide their mediocrity and good directors can't highlight. But you know, some things are just words.After I advertised that I was going to be a drama director, I couldn't see how there could be a line between myself, a female graduate student in the Department of International Politics, and a drama director.So I went all the way along the road of female graduate students.Master, Ph.D., postdoctorate, teacher, until I was too embarrassed to say that I wanted to be a drama director.

In fact, opportunities can be created even if there is no opportunity, but how hard it is to create an opportunity. You have to climb mountains and cross mountains, and cross Chishui four times. It is not like the paved highway in front of you, which can be driven unimpeded. Who didn't have any ideals when they were young, only Yang Lijuan really thought that she could have sex with Andy Lau. Earlier, one winter in college, I stood at the gate of the school auditorium waiting for a classmate.He wrote and directed a student drama, which deeply explored life and death, love, poetry and other long-term concerns in the drama world, so deeply that it deeply touched the heart of a 19-year-old female college student.In order to express my praise, I sat at the door of the auditorium and waited for his play to end.

The drama ended, everyone left, and he also came out.I mustered up the courage to run over and say congratulations on the success of the show.He said thank you and goodbye.Then I walked back along the school's boulevard in silence.One night, one month, one year, several years, can't get out of the cold of that night. After I arrived in New York, I always told myself to watch more dramas. This is the capital of dramas, so don't waste them. But I haven't watched it much. I have only watched three or four dramas in seven years. Yesterday I suddenly realized that there was no chance, and I was going to leave soon. Such a treasure was under my nose, and I didn't even bend over, how arrogant.

Then I watched it, "No End of Blame" is the kind of drama I want to see, a cartoonist's experience from World War I to the 1970s, from disillusionment with the West to disillusionment with the East to disillusionment with everything , all kinds of intense elements are in it, in line with my intense taste. I walked out of the theater feeling full.Not because of the play, but because of the fact that I watched a play.Walking on the street, the excitement of 10 years ago flashed before my eyes again.I have an idea like this, I have an idea like that... Ah, I have so many ideas.But soon I walked to the subway station, and soon the No. 2 subway came, and soon I squeezed up with the crowd.