Chapter 4 stray

The first woman I know who eulogizes homeless women is Sanmao. The song is "Olive Tree", which is sung by Qi Yu and the lyrics written by Sanmao. At that time, I didn’t know that Qi Yu was Qi Qin’s older sister. The older sister wanted to be a wanderer, and the younger brother wanted to be a wolf. After all, it didn’t look like a family. What left a deep impression was the dream of a woman who wrote lyrics. She wanted to carry a guitar and go wandering far away. , Uninhibited and unattached, like smoke and dust. I don't read many books by Sanmao, only and.For this woman, I have more respect than admiration. Every time I think of this name, I always think of the back of a woman with long hair in the sunset, and the dry and ancient wind in the African desert.

I believe that Sanmao is a woman who really wants to wander, because of the Sahara, José and the cactus deep in the desert, and there is an interesting story. When Sanmao was young, the topic composition in class was "Your Ideal". Sanmao wrote, "I want to be a rag picker. While enjoying the natural sunshine, I can see if other people have lost any good things." Teacher Furious, I called back and rewrote. Sanmao’s ideal in the second edition was: "I want to be a hawker..." The teacher reluctantly expressed his satisfaction. Although it was not lofty enough, it was still a link in social circulation. Great progress has been made.Then Sanmao continued to write, "I want to be a peddler... While enjoying the natural sunlight, I can see if anyone throws good things into the garbage dump next to me."

I think wandering is a kind of complex, many ordinary people have it, want to jump out of the ordinary world around them, dream of nature and freedom, far away and travel, life like smoke and dust.When I was in middle school, there were many girls around me who turned up their skirts to read idle books while the teacher was writing on the blackboard.When talking about ideals at lunch, the girl raised her fingers, flaunting the non-existent cardamom and said: "My ideal is to wander." This dream came to the boy's mouth, and it was: "I want to travel around the world. .” At this time, I would take a few mouthfuls of rice and try to get a piece of beef from the lunch box of my classmate who traveled thousands of miles.

Later, when I came to the United States from China, I found that this complex had poisoned Xiyi.In addition to the tourist caravan running on the highway, the wild life closer to nature is also very popular.An American friend of mine is a doctor of pharmacy student at the School of Pharmacy at the University of Illinois at Chicago. He used to be a naturalist. I live in a quiet mountain, and I have tried to enjoy nature intimately. It is said that except for clothes and contraceptives, I did not bring any material civilization equipment. I closed my bank account and sold the house, and went out laughing. This scene is in my head There is always a Milton feeling in it:

Of course, unlike Adam and Eve's fear of the harsh environment, this big brother is full of the joy of saying goodbye to pollution and bondage and enjoying the natural sunshine.However, we already know the result of this walk-and-go trip. If he is still sleeping leisurely in a hammock in nature, eating wild grapes and watching his girlfriend bathing in the stream, then the man who is about to graduate from medical school Who is that new doctor? At the age of twenty-five, this big brother stopped a car on the side of the highway with his butt naked, went to the nearest town and called home, and returned to the noisy and mundane reality.

"First the trousers were torn and there was no needle or thread," said the brother, explaining his great abandonment. "Then Illinois was too cold. If I found a place in the South, I might last two more years." The effect of these words was like a Red Army soldier who sneaked home halfway said, "There is nothing to eat on the road. If there is canned American beef, I will definitely be able to reach the revolutionary base... at least another five hundred miles." I really want to tell that American friend that you can’t pick a place when you’re a vagabond, and you always go to a beach in Florida, which is called a vacation.

Wandering has the character of wandering, and wandering also has the price of wandering. The wandering master, I think it should be Antisthenes of the Cynic school, and one generation further back, it is his teacher Socrates.The great philosopher Antisthenes had a long family name and was difficult to remember, so it is difficult to leave any impression in the memory of ordinary Chinese people. However, there is a story that is well known to women and children. It is said that one day Alexander the Great Go to visit this wandering Dazhe, who is eating the bread he begged for and sunbathing on the street.The great emperor came forward and said that I am rich all over the world, and I will give you whatever you want. Dazhe said, then you should stand aside quickly so as not to block the sun, okay?Undoubtedly, Da Zhe won this round of struggle. He adhered to the principle of the cynic school, that true happiness is not satisfied with a rich material life, but spiritual.Material things are fleeting things, and spiritual well-being is eternal and supreme.

If Antisthenes could travel 3,000 kilometers, I think he would meet the great Indian philosopher Sakyamuni, but what we are talking about is not his theory but his way of life.Antisthenes lived in a barrel, and his only possessions were a cloak, a stick, and a bread bag.This reminds us of the gang of beggars in the martial arts era and a large bowl with a broken edge.Then Antisthenes wandered so freely, why didn't he see all the disciples of the Beggar Gang full of happiness?I wonder if so many people who want to be homeless want to become disciples of the beggar gang? I always look at my vagabond friends with a kind of schadenfreude.I know that I can't persuade them, so I always wait for them to come back after they hit the south wall and tell me the story of how they failed.I still remember when I was in high school, two friends who yearned for wandering rode bicycles with 100 yuan and set out on the road to ride to the farthest place they knew.They rode to Nanjing, 200 kilometers away, made long-distance calls with the last few dollars, bought train tickets after receiving the remittance, left their bicycles, and went home quietly.

When you are young or young, people always have that kind of beautiful longing. They only look at the layer on the paper, but they can't see the sweat or even the blood stains left by the sages on the back of the paper.What a sharp and ruthless knife those people who used to wander alone once swung to cut off their dependence and nostalgia on the mundane.The descendants did not have the courage to match their dreams. Everyone repeated the experience of bumping their heads against the south wall, and An Ran also sadly returned to the reinforced concrete buildings lined with trees. Wandering is so romantic and desirable because only a few can afford it.It is a noble and even cruel enjoyment, coldly mocking ordinary people who are bound by material desires.

But it’s okay, if everyone in the world can enjoy wandering, then maybe all women will be Sanmao and all men will be Haizi.The former hoisted himself up with stockings, and the latter lay flat on the rails under the Shanhai Pass. Sometimes I think about it, wandering is still bloody, and many people have paid blood for it, but there are still newcomers looking forward to this kind of life.