Chapter 196 Chapter 196 Calm down slowly

I know it's you, calm down slowly. "what do you want to drink?" You don't need to remind me this time, my voice in memory is trembling, and I remember it very clearly. You look at me, there is no way to put the two images together, why are you so shy? —Yes, shyness, and what else?In fact, I have never been shy in front of girls. Really, the feeling I felt in front of you that day cannot be described by the word "shy". Nervous, yes, nervous. Can I not be nervous? You looked at me ignorantly, you don't know what's wrong with me? I'll tell you what's wrong with me now, I don't know who arranged it or what else - my youth, all my past youth, just sitting in front of me so alive.

You just sit quietly under the dim warm light of the wall lamp, and sit in front of the dancing flame of the candlestick. What is alive is all my youth. You sit quietly, you don't know what I'm looking at you. you know what i saw Do you know now what I saw? I see my train of recruits, my company of recruits from the Bird Infantry, my company of scouts, my battalion of kobolds, what else?And the suffocating hot wind of the tropical jungle, the white, yellow, black face with oily sweat under the blue helmet, and of course... my love. "Orange juice." You said, you were also shy—or nervous.

Then there's orange juice. I forgot what I asked for, it seemed to be some kind of beer. None of this matters anymore. The important thing is that I light a cigarette, drink beer in such a dull mood, and look at you—you said that what you see from my eyes is a different kind of feeling, different from other men, not around I'm just watching, staring at you in such a daze, I've been watching your heart——is this black servant so perverted? You start to regret asking me out—you are really afraid of some sex maniac or something, you still dare to fight four, and when you go crazy, you decide that you are not an opponent.

I don't know what you were thinking at the time, I didn't think about anything. I just looked at you silently. You can see the tears in my eyes. Always fleeting. Melancholy... you said later that the word that made your heart flutter, you have seen more men, I am not saying you have experienced it-now girls don't need to talk about love, who has seen men Not much? —but you never saw me so melancholy. You know I have a lot on my mind. But I didn't say--you must want to know, you've decided I'm a man with a story. But what did I say - I said you look a lot like a girl?That's too corny, right?You won't believe it, I dare say you dare to pick up your bag, get up and leave-girls nowadays have strong personalities, and you will never make any substitutes.

Of course I wouldn't say that, I just looked at you lightly and smoked silently. In the smog, I saw my youth. You really look like her, you know?girl? ——Actually, I shouldn’t reveal your nickname to the whole world. Hehe, it's just that I can't disclose your real name, right?Then I'll call you a girl. You do not mind right?I know you're angry, and you haven't read my later novels—including the little loyalty I showed to you. You know me, and I dare say that I can definitely do it. — We just sat at the bar. You've finally spoken, and you can't help it—what's the fun in sitting around?

"You want to chase me?" You just sucked on the orange juice with the straw in your mouth and said vaguely. What can I do, I just nodded: "Yes, chasing you." "I told you it's impossible." You finally found the words, the thrill you've been waiting to say. "Why?" I asked. "I haven't been in love yet!" You just said it in a birdy way——the subtext is that I have talked with you before you are qualified. This young lady is as beautiful as a flower, youthful and pure, and if you want to talk about it for the first time, you have to find a handsome guy. How can I be with you?

I just laughed: "I haven't talked about it either." —I'm going to tell you that I'm telling the truth and you won't believe it, but I was telling the absolute truth.Because I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to... her. "Cut!" You smiled disdainfully, "Just you? How many girls have you chased on the street? Has anyone been hooked?" I laughed, you are really the first one, but how can I say you can believe it? "Look at how stupid you are, it's okay to be friends-don't think about it! It's not that kind of friend, it's an ordinary friend!" You just say.

"Am I thinking crooked?" ——I want to be honest, I am really far behind you. You just laughed, your eyes are really bright like water under the candlelight. You later told me that you just wanted to know where this black fellow came from!You girls are like this now, very curious and adventurous. "Tell me about you, what do you do?" You asked. I thought about it for a long time, what should I say? "Director."—I'm really telling the truth, you found out later. You looked at me for a long time, and laughed: "Director? No way? The director is chasing girls on the street? ——Could it be that he wants to ask me to make a film?"

I just laughed: "No." "There should be too many beautiful girls around you?" You just laughed, "Why are you chasing me in the street so shamelessly?" ——It’s true, although I’m not famous, in other words, I’m a small person who doesn’t even have a workplace and hangs around in it, but there is really no shortage of beautiful girls—then there is no shortage now No shortage, you know what a fuck I am. ——The word "pickled face" according to my personality will turn my face at that time, but I won't do it to you, actually it's not to you, I just like to be stabbed, to be stabbed by...your face.

I smoked a cigarette: "Do you know the weight of a cigarette?" You just laugh: "I'll ask Xiaoer to bring me a balance!" I just said: "It's not the actual weight, it's the weight."