Chapter 3 Chapter two

Ellie Tacoma was very happy, she hadn't looked better in a long time. "That's great!" Aunt Adele, who took care of the housework for Grandpa Tacoma, thought so.Cousin Adele, who was also a member of the Tacoma family and had never been married, believed that a girl in her early twenties who experienced her first heartbreaking love affair would have no impact on her life. .Ellie's previous fiancé often went to meet his mistress after an evening with her, and their engagement fell apart.Although she had been sad for a while, the presence of Lo Pov made her happy again, and she looked much better, with a happy smile always on her lips, and a radiant face.

Cousin Adele, as Ellie called Aunt Adele, had a buxom East Indian figure and looked younger and fresher than she was.She was not at all like a poor relative who took care of the house. On the contrary, she was an able hostess, in charge of everything in the house, taking care of the family in every detail, and took great pride in her well-ordered home.She had never been to the East Indies, and she tended the old gentleman's house with true Dutch diligence, so that Ellie could indulge her hobbies of all ages.Ellie works tirelessly on her hobbies until they are perfect, and then she finds a new one. At the age of 18, she was already a famous tennis player.She was a medalist in the tournament, known for her finesse, power and grace, and her name was in all the sports papers.After perfecting her game, she suddenly felt bored.She hung the racket aloft in her bedroom with a pink ribbon, surrounded by medals.Afterwards, she became enthusiastic about working in charity organizations, frequently visited slums and patients, and people in the community spoke highly of her.One day, however, a patient showed her her holed leg, and she fainted on the spot.When she woke up, she felt that this was beyond the limits of her philanthropy, and she gave up charity work.Then, feeling the sensitivity and flexibility of her fingers, she started making hats for herself, not only that, but also sculptures.She succeeded in both: the hats were so beautiful that she seriously considered opening a millinery shop as a way of making a living; and the sculpture was so captivating that, after the first few lessons, she began Looking for inspiration in life, her head portrait of "begging boy" was also selected for the exhibition.Ellie fell deeply in love afterward, and her engagement lasted three months before breaking up.Despite changing interests all the time, Ellie is someone who puts her heart and soul into everything she does.As a result, the loss of love made her miserable, and she withered away and became very sick.Until one day, she stepped out of the shadows, leaving only a trace of melancholy as the only souvenir of this relationship.

Later, at the age of 23, she started writing.She wrote short stories about her engagement experience and published them under a pseudonym.This is a very good novel.Through this new hobby, she gradually came into contact with Charles Beauve.He is also a writer, mainly writing articles for newspapers.Ellie felt that she was reaching a literary limit very quickly.After writing this short story with painstaking efforts, she never wrote again.She's 23, old, and her life has had its ups and downs.However, life still has meaning, and she meets Shire.He was gentle, weak, and intelligent, with eyes as attractive as his mother's, blond hair scrupulously combed, and a blue tie that was too light.He is not the man of her dreams, and she still feels deep sadness sometimes.But she liked him, liked him a lot, and she thought it was too easy for him to waste his talents on trivial things like writing articles for newspapers, after he had written two very good novels.To this, Shire would retort that it was also an art.In Ellie's mind, however, he hadn't written anything serious in the last ten years.Ellie was a girl who wanted to be the best at everything, and now that her melancholy and sadness had turned to romance, she felt obligated in her heart to urge Lo to write something genuine and highbrow.She can no longer be busy for herself, she has to be busy for another person, Luo.Luo has so many good qualities, but he didn't cultivate them well.They saw each other more and more, she invited him to tea and they chatted together, talking for a long time.Although Lo is not really in love with Ellie, she also finds it very pleasant to be with her.Inspired, he started writing novels, but halfway through he ran out of ideas.Ellie planted in his brain the hint that he needed her, and he proposed to her.Although the two were not in love, she was very happy, and so was he.They are looking forward to a bright future where they will be together, they will chat, live together, work together, travel together, and live a life of spiritual harmony: he has a weak, empty, cynical, artistic heart, and most importantly What is remarkable is that he is very tolerant of others, and there is a touch of cynicism in his character and a deep worry about growing old, which has had a great impact on his soul; It was a serious thought, a desire to do her duty faithfully, a desire to give her life a high purpose that was relevant to others.

Ellie sang this morning, and the early autumn leaves danced in the bright golden sunlight by the window.She was busy transforming a winter bonnet with her not-quite-lost talent, when Cousin Adèle entered the room: "Grandpa slept badly last night, I kept hearing him toss and turn." "Yeah, those humming noises like talking voices bothered him," Ellie said. "You know, Grandpa always heard those noises, and Dr. Tierence thought it was a sign of total deafness. Poor Grandpa! I Going to see him right away...I gotta finish my hat first, I want to wear it today. We're going to see old Mrs. Deckers and Aunt Stephanie...Auntie, I'm so happy. Lo is so nice and so Smart, I'm sure we'd be very happy together. I'd like to travel a lot, Lo loves to travel.. We talked about living with Styne, Ottilie. I don't know what to say, I still prefer to live alone But, I don't know, I like Lo's mother very much, after all, she is Lo's mother. But I like a harmonious environment, and Styne and her often quarrel. I call him Styne, and I call him Mrs. Prudish, I don't call him Papa, and Lo also calls him Styne. It's really hard, this kind of family, if I call Styne Papa, he will feel awkward... The hat is like this , do you like it? I'll change your hat tomorrow too. Look, it's a totally new hat! I'm going to see Grandpa, he didn't sleep well last night?"

She walked out of the room without closing the door.Aunt Adele looked around. The room was full of hat ornaments. Begging Boys smile in the corner, medals wrap around tennis rackets hung with pink ribbons, and Post-it notes form a mosaic of desks. "What a mess!" said Aunt Adele. She didn't dare to touch the sticky notes, although she wanted to tidy them up, she couldn't bear to see such a mess of papers, and she had to try to control her itchy fingers.But she quickly gathered the hat ornaments and put them in a cardboard box.Then she went down the stairs, where the maids were cleaning the dining room.Ellie walked briskly up the stairs, and she heard a knock on the armchair, which she felt as if it were on her own back, and hurried up the stairs to Grandpa's room on the upper floor.She stopped outside the door, calmed her breathing, then knocked on the door, and walked in quietly:

"How are you feeling this morning, Grandpa?" The old gentleman was sitting at a table big enough for his knees, looking into a drawer.After Ellie came in, he locked the drawer quietly.She stepped forward and kissed him: "I heard you didn't sleep well?" "No, boy, I don't think I've slept at all. But Grandpa's fine if he stays up." Grandpa Tacoma is 93 years old. He married late, and his son married late, so he has a granddaughter Ellie's age.However, he looked younger than his age, much younger, perhaps because he seemed to be indifferent to appearance and cared about it very much, and the two were skillfully combined in him.His ivory head was ringed with thin gray hair, and his clean-shaven face was like speckled parchment; His smile was the same as in his youth; his eyes were a clear brown, bright and keen despite his glasses.He is not tall, slender and thin, like a young man; on his thin and slightly stooped back is a very short jacket, which is open in the front and has many folds in the back; his hands are constantly shaking, The hands, too large for his small stature, were finely textured and always perfectly clean; the muscles in his neck spasmed from time to time, pulling his head to one side; he spoke His voice is cheerful and lively, but friendly to the point of artificiality. No matter how simple the meaning he wants to express, he speaks carefully and slowly.He was always erect in his chair, never stooped even in ordinary situations, and seemed to be always alert.When he walked he was always brisk, taking small strides on his stiff legs so that no one could see that he was rheumatic.He had worked as a civil servant in the East India, and finally became a member of the East India Parliament, and had received an East India pension many years ago.It was evident from his conversation that he had been preoccupied with politics, with colonial affairs, which he always laughed at with mild irony.The people he dealt with were all his juniors, except Mrs. Dex Dillonhoft, 97, and Dr. Le Loves, 88. There was no one of his age.In dealing with others, he is kind and humble. He knows that the world he sees must be different from that of others, even if the other party is a person in his sixties or seventies.However, he was so friendly that sometimes it was so fake that it made people feel that what he said was not what he really thought.He comes across as a diplomat, always on the alert, saying insincere words to get the information he wants.Sometimes there would be a flash of light in the bright eyes behind the lenses, as if he had noticed something suddenly and acutely; Twisted into the shape of a smile, he would rush into agreement with whoever he was talking to.

The most amazing thing is that at such an advanced age, although he is trembling, he still has quick and clear thinking, as if there is some magical power to keep his senses sharp, healthy and durable.He still retains the habit of reading a great deal, albeit with the help of glasses; he still has a good hearing;It's just that sometimes in the middle of a conversation, a burst of irresistible tiredness will hit him, and his eyes will suddenly stare blankly ahead, and then he will fall asleep.Those he talks to don't bother him, and politely don't let him notice. After 5 minutes, he would wake up and continue talking, seemingly completely unaware that he had experienced a brief period of unconsciousness.No one could see the shock he felt when he woke up.

Ellie visits Grandpa every morning to chat with him for a while. "We're going out this afternoon," said Ellie. "Go and drop by, we haven't been out for a while." "Not even to see grandma." "Let's go to see her first this afternoon. Grandpa, we have been engaged for three days. You can't disturb everyone as soon as you have something happy." "You are very happy, child," said Grandpa kindly. "I think so……" "I'm sorry I couldn't keep you around, you and Lo," he continued softly.Sometimes he would speak of serious subjects in a hollow tone, and whenever this happened, his thin voice always seemed too flat. "But you see, I'm too old to live with young people! Besides, it's much more fun to live by yourselves... Baby, you and I, we never talked about money. You know, your daddy He's been doing all sorts of business in Java, squandering your mother's money and getting nothing done, and your poor parents never had much luck. Well, baby, I'm not rich, but I can maintain this kind of life in the house on Maurice Quay, because the old man doesn't need much, and Aunt Adele is very shrewd and keeps everything in order. I calculated that I can give you 200 a month Guilders, but that's all, boy, that's all..."

"But, grandpa, that's really a lot." "You can get this money from Grandpa. After all, you are my heir, but you will not be alone. No, Grandpa knows other people, well-meaning acquaintances, and good friends... I live It won't be long, son. You won't be very rich, because this house is my only luxury. Everything else, you know, is worth nothing. But you will be well, especially later, Lo seems to be making a lot of money. Oh boy, it's not money he cares about, it's... it's..." "What is it, Grandpa?" The old man suddenly felt tired.However, a few minutes later, he continued:

"I heard you're going to live with Styne..." "Yes, but it hasn't been finalized yet." "Ottilie is a good fellow, but has a bad temper," said the old gentleman, lost in thought, and seemed to be thinking of something else, something very important. "If I agree, it will be because she is Luo's mother, Grandpa, she is too attached to Luo, and I would prefer to live in my own small house. But we will travel often no matter what. Lo said he had a way of traveling very cheaply." "Son, if you've been clever you can do that, I mean about living with the Steins. Ottilie is very lonely indeed, poor thing. Who knows? Maybe you You can give her a little love, a little sympathy..."

His hollow voice became soft, full, sincere. "We'll be watching, Grandpa. Would you like to stay upstairs, or come downstairs for lunch?" "Bring up the food. I have no appetite, no appetite..." His voice became unreal again, like the rustling of the wind. "It's very windy today, and I think it's going to rain. Are you going out this afternoon?" "Going out for a while, I want to... go to Mrs. Deckers..." "Go to grandma..." "Yes, yes, it's better to call her grandma. When you see her, call her grandma. That way she won't look so estranged, and she will like it... Although you and Luo are not married yet..." His voice dropped.He sighed, as if thinking of something else, something more important.Then, his neck twitched, his head suddenly turned to one side, and he remained in this position for a while. He seemed to hear something and seemed to be listening carefully.Ellie feels that grandpa is not in a good state today.Tiredness hit him again, his head drooped, his eyes became dull.He sat there, looking so weak, so feeble, that life weighed on him as lightly as a fluttering feather, as if it would leave him with an effortless blow.Ellie hesitated for a moment, then left his room.The gentle closing sound of the door startled the old man, and he suddenly regained consciousness.He sat motionless for a while, then opened the desk drawer he had been rummaging through, and took out some paper, a torn letter.He tore the papers into as many shreds as he could, and threw them into the wastebasket with the other waste.Then he started tearing off one letter, and then a third, tearing them up before he even read them.He tossed the scraps of paper into the wastebasket and shook it again and again, his stiff fingers weary from tearing letters, his arms straining from shaking the wastebasket. "Tear some more in the afternoon." He murmured. "There's still time, there's still time..."