Chapter 26 Ten lessons of a good wife - when love is a thing of the past

In most civilized countries, the best way to get a divorce is to solve the problem rationally and break up peacefully, so that there will be no difficulties and obstacles to divorce, and unnecessary expenses can be ticked off.If both husband and wife feel that life has become unbearable, it is best to give them the option to divorce.Usually, a divorce is better than a separation because both parties have the right to start anew.If there are children, it is necessary to ensure that the children can be properly raised before the divorce; if there are no children, or the children are three to six months old, the husband and wife only need to repeat the appeal to agree to the divorce.

Sometimes, when the husband and wife feel that they can no longer live together, things may turn around. After the crisis has passed for a month or two, the two get back together and live a happy life. It is hard to believe that they There have been deep conflicts.Therefore, you must be cautious about divorce, and don't make a quick decision if you think there is hope.There are very few couples in the world who don't quarrel and have no conflicts. Some couples have a deeper relationship after the quarrel, followed by gluey sweetness, and the sunshine after the storm is even brighter.But there are also some people who take divorce too simply, and often regret it soon after divorce, even though life is very peaceful.

The issue of divorce, like any other, has two sides.If there is no love between husband and wife, and they don't know how to respect each other, and it is truly irreversible, then the sooner they leave, the better.Because it is not only good for them, but also good for the development of children.Parents who hate and despise each other is not a healthy environment for children to grow up in.However, if it is just a disagreement of temper or disagreement, then don’t be impatient, and slowly find out those salvageable and temporary reasons through analysis. If you want to divorce, there is plenty of time, so don’t be in a hurry.

If you have already chosen divorce, it is too late to regret it.There are many divorced couples who choose to live together again because they are shy and afraid that such a move will make their friends think it is ridiculous-in fact, it is true. It's hard for an upright official to decide on housework Complicated disputes in family life are not uncommon, but don't listen to the opinions of strangers, because his ideas are often far-fetched and easily misunderstood.If you have a disagreement with your husband, it is best to try to resolve the issue internally and not let outsiders get involved, otherwise, you will not only regret it, but even blame him.When your conflicts disappear and your family life becomes harmonious again, you often don't want to see this outsider's face again.

Generally speaking, it is very inappropriate for an outsider to intervene in the internal conflicts between husband and wife, because it is absolutely impossible for an outsider to know where the crux of the conflict is and who should take greater responsibility.Sometimes it may be a trivial matter at all, and neither husband nor wife has any responsibility.Even though they're both very likable people, there's still potential for an explosive mix taken together.When this happens, outsiders often feel that the grumpy party is largely responsible.However, sometimes the opposite is true. A person who looks capable and honest to outsiders, with nothing wrong with him, is a devil at home.How would an outsider know?How can he correctly judge the conflict between husband and wife?There was a man who was so good out there that everyone felt good about him and almost thought he was perfect.So whenever he had conflicts with his wife, people always said that his wife was wrong.In the end, it was discovered that it was the man who played some tricks to make his wife's life very painful.Everything is turned upside down.

The trouble should end it.It is very inappropriate to let outsiders solve family conflicts-whether it is relatives or friends, sometimes the more they help, the more they help.He even protected the person who caused the quarrel without knowing the truth, and wronged the innocent party. Divorced or separated women should pay attention 1.Whether you're trying to maintain the status quo, separate, or divorce, you're likely to experience some level of anxiety and pain that tends to range from mild to intense.Our suggestion is: even if you have this kind of anxiety, don't think it is a shortcoming in your character and make a fuss. It's just because your anger is still there, and the depression will naturally produce anxiety in your heart.

2.You'd better talk to a professional if you both think there's room for salvage in the relationship. 3.Vent out the resentment in your heart.You should know that if people consciously keep their anger inside, it can build up your worries and eventually make them miserable.Therefore, worry is a manifestation of self-repression and self-deception. In this case, the best way is to find someone to confide in, vent your grievances, or cry bitterly. The way to vent your emotions is related to your own personality and habits. We can only provide some practical ways, and it is up to you to decide which one to take.If yelling feels out of style to you, and you have never experienced it in your life, then don't do it and try another approach.You can choose some kind of activity, such as going for a walk, or go for a long ride on the bike, and your anger will likely go away.

4. Efforts should be made to create the possibility of independent living.You can't rely on others for everything, you should say "I can not rely on my husband", "he should understand my needs, I don't need to ask him for everything", and don't be timid, because in some cases you must Self-struggle, at the same time should also obtain useful knowledge from books.It is best to accumulate some useful experience and take everything into consideration.You may not succeed, but you must be prepared to fail and succeed at the same time. 5.It is still exciting to be able to start life again.Try to socialize with all kinds of different people and make more friends.But don't expect a man to help you right away, although it's possible.

6.Divorced mothers don't find it easy.If you are taking care of the children this week, as a mother, you should start arranging for the divorced husband to spend time with the children next week, if not once a week, at least two weekends in a month. Such an arrangement.Despite being divorced, the men are still responsible for the children.This is their duty, don't hesitate to do it. 7. There are no good memories in the past, and the future life should be considered.What are your thoughts on the future?What do you plan to do?Looking for a job?Have a new friend?Or have a new interest?You should break those rules and regulations and arrange your life well.If you already have children, you should make them happy, but at the same time don't forget about yourself.Because as long as the mother is happy, the children will be happy too.We know all too well that there are times when life is not a joy for you.But even a smooth life can have its difficulties, and those hardships will no doubt help you in your life.

8.If you're extremely depressed and can't get it out on your own, the best thing to do is to talk to other women and form a chat group with them.In a shared exchange, you can learn from other people's experiences to solve problems. 9.Might as well live with other women who are in the same situation as you.This can reduce your financial pressure, and at the same time have a companion who can help each other and take care of the children together. 10.If you feel distracted, you should sit down and rest for a few hours without distractions.If you have enough time, you might as well go to a movie or listen to a speech.

11.Even if you are eager to find a job, pretend that you are not in a hurry.Don't tell my employer I'm taking time off to care for the kids.Because no one likes asking for trouble.When unexpected things happen, or hope fails, you should maintain an optimistic attitude and say: "It's okay, it will get better in the future." 12.If you plan to take the children to play, you should plan your time early and arrange some recreational activities.Don't stay home and wait for them, thinking they will be back soon.In fact, this situation basically does not happen.So try not to do stupid things, or you will wrong yourself. 13.If you want to relearn a certain skill, don't forget to ask your ex-husband to provide the cost, remind him not to forget the price you have paid for him, such as quitting your job to take care of the children, or for him to be able to complete To engage in some kind of hard work in order to study.