Chapter 36 Chapter 3 Do this and you're about to get divorced

Disraeli's arch rival in public life was Grace Bunch.The two of them would have conflicts whenever they encountered major national affairs that could be debated.However, they have one thing in common, which is that they are very happy in their private lives. Grace and his wife have spent fifty-nine years of happy life together.We would like to imagine Grace beckoning the great British prime minister, holding his wife's hand, and singing on the rug around the hearth. Grace was a formidable enemy in public, but at home he never criticized anyone.Whenever he went downstairs to eat in the morning and saw that there were still people in the family who were asleep and had not got up, he would use a gentle method to replace the blame he should have had.

He raised his voice and sang a song that filled the room with his singing... It was telling the family that was still awake, the busiest man in Britain, alone, waiting for them to have breakfast together.Graystone had his diplomatic skills, but he was considerate and took pains to avoid criticism in the family. The Russian Empress "Catherine" did the same.She ruled a vast empire in the world, holding the power to kill tens of millions of people.Politically, she was a brutal tyrant, rejoicing in war after war.As long as she uttered a word, the enemy sentenced her to death.But if her cook burnt the meat, she would eat it without saying a word, smiling.Her tolerance should be followed by ordinary men.

"Dorothy Dix" is an authority on the causes of unhappy marriages in the United States.She put forward the following point of view: more than 50% of marriages fail; why do many sweet dreams all hit the rocks after marriage?She knew there was a reason, and that was because criticism was useless, heartbreaking criticism. So, if you want to keep your family happy and happy, remember the third rule, which is: Don't criticize. If you were going to criticize your kids, you thought I would dissuade you from doing that...no, not that.I'm just going to tell you this, before you criticize them, take a look at the "What My Father Forgot" article. This article came out in the comments section of a family magazine.We have obtained the consent of the original author and specially reproduced it here.

"What My Father Forgot" is a short article, but it has resonated with countless readers, and it has become a book that anyone can reprint.A few years ago, after that article was published for the first time, as the author of this article "Remit" said: "It has been published in hundreds of magazines, family organizations, and newspapers all over the country, and it has also been translated into many foreign languages. I have promised thousands of people to use this article in schools, churches, and Readings from the pulpit, and countless air broadcasts. Surprisingly, college magazines adopted it, and high school magazines adopted it as well.Sometimes a short article will have a strange effect, and this one is like that. "

"What My Father Forgot" by Remet. "Listen, my son: I said this when you fell asleep, your little palm was pressed under your wish, and the golden hair was glued to your forehead with sweat." , I quietly came into your room.That was a few minutes ago, when I was reading a book in the study, a sudden strong insult stirred my heart, made me lose my defense, and made me feel guilty and came to your bedside. These are the things that come to my mind, boy - I think I'm being too hard on you.When you were dressing for school in the morning, I scolded you when you wiped your face lightly with a towel; I scolded you because you didn't wipe your shoes clean; , I also blame you loudly.

I found fault with you at breakfast; said you were wrong about this, and that was not... you rested your elbows on the table and you spread too much butter on your bread.When you started to go to the game and I went to catch the train, you turned around and waved to me and said, "Daddy, goodbye!" I frowned again and said, "Go home!" In the afternoon, it all started again.When I came back from the outside, I found you kneeling on the ground playing with stones, and there were many holes in your socks. I saw those children humiliating you, so I immediately asked you to come back with me.Socks cost money; be extra careful if you're paying for them yourself!Just think, boy, that kind of words come from a father!

Do you remember?Later, when I was reading the newspaper in the study, you walked in timidly, with a sad look in your eyes.When I looked up and saw you, I felt that you were bothering me, and I felt very impatient.I asked you angrily, "What do you want to do?" You didn't say anything, but ran over suddenly, threw yourself into my arms, put your arms around my head, and kissed me... Your little hands hugged me tightly, which was full of admiration and enthusiasm.This kind of enthusiasm for admiration is planted in your heart by God, like a beautiful flower, although it is neglected by others, it will not wither.After you kissed me, you left me and ran upstairs.

Not long after you left, my child, my newspaper slipped from my hand, and suddenly a terrible pain and fear came upon me.It's the habit that dominates me, scolding you all day long, hating you; finding fault with you.Is this a kind of reward from me to you?Son, it's not that Daddy doesn't love you, doesn't like you, it's because I expect too much from you, I use my own age to measure you. In fact, there are many advantages in your character, all of which are lovable. Your young heart is like a ray of dawn in the morning... This is shown by the fact that you suddenly came back to kiss me and say good night.Child, in this quiet night, I quietly came to your room, and confessed to you with guilt and unease that this is an ignorant father, a poor father.

If you hadn't fallen asleep, I told you these words, in your heart, you wouldn't understand.However, what I must do today is to be a really good father.When you laugh, I laugh too. When you are in pain, I am willing to accompany you to bear the pain. When I sometimes lose my temper and want to blame you, I will bite my tongue to stop the words.I would keep saying to myself, "Yes, he's just a little kid...he's still a little kid" I'm afraid I think of you as an adult.Now I see you sleeping soundly and tiredly on the little bed, and now I understand that you are still a child.Yesterday, you were lying in your mother's arms, with your head and face on her shoulders.Yes, you are still a child who loves the caress of a loving mother. I ask too much of you...too much! "