Chapter 31 Chapter 8 Makes Mistakes Look Easy to Correct

I have an unmarried friend in his forties who got engaged not long ago.His fiancée persuaded him to learn to dance, which may be too late for him.When he told me about the situation, he said: "God knows, I need to learn to dance -- because I dance like I did twenty years ago when I started dancing. The first teacher I ever had was probably straight. She told me, My dance moves were all wrong and I had to learn them all over again, but that discouraged me. I didn't have the heart to learn any more, so I quit her. The second teacher may not be telling the truth, but I am very happy to hear it.She said indifferently that the dance steps I danced were a bit old-fashioned, but the basic steps were correct. She said that it would not be difficult for me to learn several popular new dance steps.

The first teacher dispelled my interest, and the second teacher was just the opposite. She kept praising me and reduced my mistakes in dance steps.She said to me affirmatively: "You have a very natural sense of rhythm, you should be a talented dancer. But I know that I am only a fourth-rate dancer."However, in my heart, I hope that what she said may be true.Yes, maybe I paid the tuition to make her say that. But, anyway, the steps I'm dancing are much better than before she said that I have a "very natural sense of rhythm".I thank her, her words encouraged me, gave me hope, and made me willing to improve myself. "

Tell a child, a husband, or an employee that he is stupid about something and has no sense of family , what he did was completely wrong.Then you will destroy his desire to be aggressive and motivated.However, if you use a reverse technique, give people a little more encouragement to see things as easy.Let the other party know that you have confidence in him and that he has undeveloped talents, then he will make the best effort to win this victory. That's the method used by Thomas -- he must be a great artist in human relations.He will complete you, give you confidence, and encourage you with courage and trust.I will now give an example:

I recently spent the weekend with Mr. and Mrs. Thomas, and they invited me to play "bridge" on Saturday night. "Bridge" is completely unknown to me; this game is like a very mysterious riddle to me. "No, no, I won't!" I had to say. Thomas said, "There's no skill here Dale--in bridge, you just have to use memory and judgment, and there's no skill at all. You wrote a chapter on memory." , so, bridge. It's a very easy game for you to learn." It was the first time in my life that I sat at a "bridge" table. It was because Thomas said I had a talent for playing "bridge" and I felt that the game was not difficult.

Talking about the game of "bridge" reminds me of Caberson.Wherever "bridge" is played, there is no one who does not know the name of Caberson.His books on "bridge" have been translated into twelve languages, and the number of sales and distribution is no less than one million.However, he once told me this--if a young woman hadn't told him that he had a talent for playing "bridge", he would never have played "bridge" as a career. When he came to the United States in 1922, he planned to find a career teaching philosophy or sociology, but it didn't work out.

fruit. Later, he sold coal for others, but failed. In the end, he sold coffee for others, but nothing came of it. At that time, it never occurred to him to teach people to play the game of "bridge".Not only is he not good at playing cards, but he is also very stubborn; he often finds out many troublesome questions to ask each other, so no one wants to play cards with him. Later he meets a beautiful bridge teacher, Ms. "Dillon", falls in love with her, and they get married.At that time, Dylan noticed that he analyzed the cards in his hand very carefully, so he said that he had a latent genius for "bridge".Ke Bai told me that it was because of the encouragement of Di Lun's words that he later became a professional "bridge" expert.

So, if you want to change people's will without offending, or causing repugnance, the eighth rule is: Use encouragement to make the mistakes you want to correct seem easy to do; make it easy to do what you want the other person to do.