Chapter 2 Preface

-- "The Completion of the Book" Dale Carnegie Over the past thirty-five years, American publishers have published more than 200,000 books of various kinds, most of which are boring, and many of which have lost money.Did I say "many"?A person in charge of one of the world's leading publishing companies recently admitted to me that his company has seventy-five years of publishing experience, but for every eight books it publishes, seven books are still at a loss. So how could I dare to take the risk and write this book again?And why did you bother to read it when I wrote it?

Yes, both of these are serious issues. In order to clearly explain the process of completing this book, I need to briefly repeat a few facts written by "Lowell Thomas" in the "Foreword". Beginning in 1993, I conducted an educational program in New York for business and professional men and women.In the beginning, I only held speech courses... The purpose of this kind of course is to use practical experience to train adults to express themselves more clearly, effectively and calmly according to their own ideas in business negotiations and groups. idea. But after several seasons, I realized that although these people deeply need effective speech training, they also need more urgent training in the skills of getting along with others in daily life and communication.

I myself have gradually realized that I also deeply need this kind of training.As I look back on those years now, I feel apprehensive about what I lacked. If I had had this book in my hand twenty years ago, its value would have been incalculable. How to deal with people should be the biggest problem you face, especially if you are a businessman.The same happens even if you are an accountant, a housewife, an architect, or an engineer. A few years ago, with the support of the "Carnegie Foundation", the survey and research conducted made an important discovery!This discovery was later confirmed by research conducted by the Carnegie Institute of Technology.According to the survey data, 15% of a person's economic success is due to his skills and knowledge.Eighty-five percent of them are due to "human engineering", that is, personality, and the ability of leaders.

Years ago, I held quarterly classes at the Society of Engineers in Philadelphia, and I also held classes for the chapter of the American Society of Electrical Engineers.A total of more than 1,500 engineers have attended my workshops.After they came to me, they finally found out, through years of observation and experience, that the people who get the highest pay in engineering are often not the people who know the most about engineering. We can pay twenty-five to fifty dollars a week to hire engineering, accounting, architectural, or other professional technical skills, and the market will always be full of such skills.But in addition to technology and intelligence, plus the ability to express self-awareness, the ability to act as a leader, and the ability to inspire others, then his income will naturally increase.

John.At the peak of his career, Rockefeller once said to Bai Luoxier: "The ability to deal with people is also a commodity that can be purchased, just like sugar and coffee." This ability, paid for, costs more than anything else in the world.” The University of Chicago, in conjunction with the YMCA Schools, conducted a survey to determine what grown-ups really want to study! The research fee was 25,000 yuan, and it took two years. The last part of the investigation was held in "Meridon, Connecticut".That place is considered a typical American town, and every adult in the town of Meryton was interviewed, and they were asked to answer one hundred and fifty-six questions at the same time.

These questions are like... What is your profession, or what is your specialty?What is your education level?What is your volunteer?What are the problems you need to solve?How do you spend your spare time?What is your income?What are your hobbies?What is your favorite subject?It is this type of question that investigators are asking. The results of that survey show that health is the most important thing for most people. As for the second interest, it is how to understand others, how to get along with them, how to make others like you, and how to make others agree with you. The committee which conducted the inquiry decided to hold such a course for the adults of Meriton.They searched hard for a practical book on the meaning of such a subject, but could not find one.Finally, they went to a world-renowned authoritative adult educator and asked if he had a book that would meet the needs of these adults. "No," the educator replied, "I know what those adults need, but what they need The kind of book that is needed has never been written.”

Knowing, from my experience, that what he said was true, I myself have spent many years seeking a practical and effective book on the relationship between human beings. Since many people wanted such a book, I tried to write one, which is this book, which was written for my workshop. I hope you will like it too. I have read everything I can find on this topic in preparation for writing this book.Includes "Dicks" newspaper mailbox answers, others such as divorce court records, parent magazines, and various notable books.At the same time, I also hired a trained person to research, explore.It took him a year and a half to read the materials I had missed in various libraries, explore various psychology special collections, follow various magazine articles, explore countless biographies of great men, and find out the great figures of each era. How to deal with people.

We have read the biographies of the great men of all ages, and the biographies of the leaders, from Caesar to Edison.As for Roosevelt's biographies, I have collected more than one hundred.We decided to spend no time, no money, to find out what practical advice anyone has had on making friends and influencing people since ancient times. I have personally interviewed world-renowned successful people, trying to find out from them the techniques they use in interpersonal relationships. From these sources, I prepared a short speech.The title I used was "How to Make Friends and Influence People."At first this article was short, but later it was extended and expanded, and now it is a speech that takes one hour and thirty minutes.Over the years, I have told them this lecture every quarter in the "Carnegie Institution" course in New York.

I give them lectures, and I also tell them to experiment in the outside world, socially, and then come back to the workshop and tell about their experiences and achievements.What a fun course this is!The men and women, eager for self-improvement, were thrilled with the idea of ​​working in a new type of laboratory, the first and only one for the study of human relationships for adults. This book is not completed like a normal writing situation, but grown up like a child.It was grown in the laboratory, out of the experience of thousands of adults. Many years ago, we printed a set of rules on a card no bigger than a postcard.When it comes to the next season, we print on a larger card than in the past.Then go down to print a booklet, and then a set of small books.Each size and scope has been expanded and enriched until now, after fifteen years of experimentation and research, this book has emerged.

The rules we make here are not mere theories, or conjectures, but they work miraculously.It sounds unbelievable, but the application of these rules and principles has indeed changed the lives and habits of many people. Now there is an example of this... Last time, a boss with 314 employees joined this workshop class.Over the years, he has driven, criticized, and reprimanded his employees without restraint or scruple.As for kindness, morality, and encouragement, he never said anything from him.After studying the principles discussed in this book, the boss suddenly changed his outlook on life.In the organization he was in charge of, a spirit of loyalty, enthusiasm, and cooperation emerged; the original 314 "enemies" became 314 "friends".

In a speech at the workshop, he proudly said: "I used to walk around my organization, and no one greeted me. When my employees saw me approaching, they immediately turned their faces away, but now they are all My friends are gone, even the gatekeeper outside greets me by my name!" The boss now has more profits, more leisure, and more importantly, he has gained more happiness in his business and family. There are many salesmen who have seen their sales records skyrocket by applying the principles of the seminar workshops.Many customers who were unavailable in the past have also become their new customers.Senior officials of corporate institutions not only received greater powers, but their salaries were also increased.A senior employee who gave a report to the workshop last season said that his annual salary had increased by 5,000 yuan because of the implementation of these rules.Another high-ranking employee of the Philadelphia Gas Company has decided to be demoted because of his inability to lead people tactfully.However, after going through this training, not only did he save the crisis of being demoted at the age of 65, but he was also promoted and his salary was improved. At the dinner party at the end of the course, the wives told me that their families have been better and happier since their husbands took the training. Harvard University's famous professor Willem.James once said: "If we compare with what we should achieve, we are only half awake, we only use a small part of the energy of our body and mind. We are within the limit, and there is more. Energy, but habitually not using it.” Lurking in your body and mind, those energies that you habitually do not use:. ...the sole purpose of this book is to help you discover it, develop it, and use it—those untapped treasures you have conceived in your body and mind! If after reading the first three chapters of this book, you don't appear to be any more prepared to deal with the norms of life, at least for you, I think this book is a total failure!Because the biggest purpose of education is not only seeking knowledge, but practical action. This is an action book! This preface is like a general preface, but it is too long. Now let's get down to business, please see the first chapter below!