Chapter 2 Chapter 1 Getting Rid of the Fear of Public Speaking

People with good eloquence have better psychological qualities.Good psychological quality is not born, it needs to be exercised and cultivated the day after tomorrow.In terms of eloquence and needs, the training and cultivation of a speaker's psychological quality includes many factors. We mainly introduce the following three aspects. 1. Self-confidence Let's take a speech as an example to see the impact of eloquence when speaking with confidence. Some speakers with weak confidence will be depressed when they encounter failure in a speech, forming an inferiority complex and depression, which is very detrimental to speech.In fact, the favorable and unfavorable conditions in the speech should be viewed dialectically and analyzed in detail.

Some speakers are often uneasy about their appearance, clothing, age, and gender; some speakers are ashamed of their profession as "not noble"; ; Some speakers feel anxious, fearful, etc. because of the audience's cultural upbringing, theoretical quality, and low or high appreciation level. In fact, as long as the speaker can treat these unfavorable factors correctly and find ways to improve them, they can turn unfavorable factors into favorable factors, so there is no need to take the problem too seriously.Especially unfavorable factors caused by some objective reasons, even if they cause some interference to the speech, the audience can understand it. The speaker can completely let go of the burden of thought and devote himself to the speech. Don’t let some trivial things affect your speech level play.

An issue of the magazine Speech and Eloquence carried this article: A college girl once received a call from a classmate asking if she would like to be a tutor.She was surprised, thought it was a fantasy, and asked suspiciously: "Can I do it?" The classmate said: "Can I do it, you can try it!" Parents thought that she always lacked confidence in doing things, so they encouraged her to do it. .The one being taught was a junior high school girl with weak intelligence. After some careful guidance by her, her studies improved significantly, and soon she took the "high school-university" integrated exam.The parents of the junior high school students were very happy, and said to their daughter: "Thanks to this little teacher, I will never forget your first teacher." This junior college girl was pleasantly surprised to find that her tutor ability.She found her self-confidence, her courage doubled, and she planned to go to the south by herself without waiting for assignments after graduation.This shows that if you give up practice and dare not experiment, you will not find the cornerstone and fulcrum of self-confidence; seize the opportunity and devote yourself to practice, and you will find not only self-confidence, but also the starting line of your life.

2. Self-control, calm Only with a calm mind can people quickly recognize and suppress the relevant factors that cause negative psychology, and at the same time recognize and stimulate the relevant factors that cause positive psychology.For example, if a speaker wants to suppress panic and dissatisfaction when the audience is unwilling to listen or criticize in a social situation, the only way to find out whether the real reason is on the audience's side or on his own side is through calm analysis. What is the specific reason.If you don't have a calm mind and don't know how to control yourself, you won't be able to find the problem, and the situation will get out of control.Therefore, no matter what happens in communication, the first thing you need is to be calm and calm.

Proper self-control comes only when you are calm. When British Prime Minister Wilson gave a speech at a mass meeting, the opponents clamored from below, and one of them cursed loudly: Shit, rubbish!Facing possible misunderstandings and disturbances from the audience, Prime Minister Wilson calmly responded with a broad smile, raised his hands in agreement very seriously, and said: This gentleman said well, and we will discuss the mess you are particularly interested in in a moment. problem.The troublemakers were suddenly speechless, and the audience responded with warm applause. 3. Self-improvement

For a master with strong language expression ability, his self-improvement is manifested as not being afraid of failure, not afraid of blows and setbacks, daring and being good at rising from oral communication failures, daring and being good at standing upright from setbacks to the podium again and again , Consciously undergo training and testing in various situations such as prosperity, adversity, victory, and failure, so as to cultivate one's strong resilience.Mencius, an ancient thinker, said: "Heaven will send a great mission to the people. They must first suffer from their minds and wills, exhaust their muscles and bones, starve their bodies and skins, empty their bodies, and disturb their actions. Impossible.” Su Shi, a great writer in the Song Dynasty, also said: “In ancient times, the so-called heroes and lofty ideals must have the festival of surpassing others, and some people can’t bear it. When a man sees humiliation, he draws his sword and stands up to fight. This is not brave enough. The world Those who are not brave, come suddenly without being surprised, without reason and without anger; this is what they hold great, and their ambitions are far away." These ancient teachings are still very strong for people today to train their tenacious will and strong character. reference significance.

The key to cultivating the spirit of self-improvement is to treat failure correctly.The failure of a speech is a bitter cup of life, but it is not a complete failure of life.It is inevitable that a person will fail. As long as he is not willing to fail, not discouraged, analyzes the reasons with a positive attitude, learns lessons, and perseveres in speaking, he will move from failure to success.French thinker Montaigne said: The bravest man is sometimes the most unfortunate man.Hence the triumphant defeat which proudly counters victory.Dale Carnegie said: A person must be good at cultivating success from failure.Obstacles and failures are the two surest stepping stones to success.No other factor can work more on a man if he will study them and make use of them.And look back, don't you see that failure helped you there?He also said: It is failure that makes bones hard; it is failure that turns cartilage into muscle; it is failure that makes people invincible.These words are very inspiring for people to cultivate their self-improvement psychology.

People's level of speaking is different from their psychological state, and they have different performances when they speak.There are mainly the following types of mental states. 1. Impulsive Impulsiveness refers to a state of mind that does not care about the consequences, acts rashly, has strong emotions, and lacks rationality.People of this type are often in a state of high emotional excitement, like an open gas stove, which will ignite when it encounters sparks.Its manifestations are that they are not calm enough when encountering problems, easily get angry, eager to express their opinions, like to speak well, and make decisions easily.Most of the speeches are blurted out, without carefulness, strategy, and consequences.Either choke the listener so embarrassed that he cannot communicate with him; or expose himself to the listener; or annoy or even irritate the listener, making the listener fight back.

However, this kind of person is open-minded and speaks recklessly.Just like beans in a bamboo tube, pour them out with a snap, and when the pouring is over, he will be fine and calm, and often there is no stage fright, and he often talks endlessly when he is interested. There are many such characters among Liangshan heroes, such as Lu Zhishen, Li Kui, Ruan Xiaoqi and so on.Li Kui and Yan Qing went out and stayed in a manor house. Hearing that the owner of the manor said that Song Jiang had robbed his daughter, he immediately yelled at Yan Qing: "Brother Yi, come and listen to what this old man said. My brother was duplicity, no Good man!" Yan Qing persuaded him: "Brother, don't make any mistakes, it will definitely be fine!" Li Kui said: "He went to Li Shishi's house in Tokyo, and I'm afraid he won't do it here." Then he ignored the persuasion and ran away. Returning to Liangshan, he chopped down the apricot-yellow flag that "walked the way for the sky", pointed at Song Jiang and cursed: "I usually treat you like a man, but you turned out to be a beast! You did such a good thing!" After the fact was clarified, it turned out that A robber pretended to be Song Jiang's name, and he woke up and admitted his mistake.His psychological quality not only does not affect his status in the hearts of readers, but makes people know him more honestly, frankly, and more lovely.But when speaking in public, people of this type need to control their emotions and think carefully before speaking, so as not to not only fail to achieve the effect of expression, but also cause unnecessary trouble.

2. Rational type Rationality is a manifestation of the ability to control behavior intellectually.This kind of person is emotionally restrained, not easy to express, and good at controlling emotions.Don't rush or rush when encountering problems, and deal with them calmly; don't easily express affirmative or negative statements; words are often spoken after careful consideration, and are more thoughtful and strategic.This kind of rhetoric is easy for the listener to accept; even if it is unacceptable, it will not cause great conflict.However, this kind of person sometimes misses things at critical moments when a decisive decision is needed.Some opportunities are fleeting, never to be missed, never to come again, and when you think about it, it will be too late.Moreover, if it is too rational, it will make people feel hypocritical and deep, and it will not be able to gain the psychological approval of the audience.

Compared with Xiang Yu, his opponent Liu Bang is rational.Qin Shihuang went on a tour, and Liu Bang also saw it, but he only sighed quietly: "Wow, a man should be like this!" In the original intention, he and Xiang Yu are the same, they both want to be emperor.But he didn't rush out like Xiang Yu, who was about to seize the throne, but just admired in a low voice, even if others heard it, it didn't matter.When he stationed troops on the ridge, he clearly wanted to attack key points and compete with Xiang Yu, but at the Hongmen Banquet, which was not conducive to him, he bowed his head and said to Xiang Yu: "The minister and the general will fight Qin with all their strength. The general will fight in Hebei, and the minister will fight in Henan. Otherwise I thought that if I could enter the pass first and defeat Qin, I would see the general here again. Now there is a villain's words, which will make the general and the ministers disagree." Not only won Xiang Yu's trust, but also induced Xiang Yu to tell the informer.Later Liu Bang and Xiang Yu fought against each other. When Xiang Yu pushed his father to be killed and forced him to retreat, he actually said: "I and Xiang Yu were ordered to face King Huai, saying 'about brothers'. My old man is Ruo Weng If you want to cook, but you are old, you will be lucky to share a piece of my pie." After he killed Xiang Yu, the group asked him to be honored as emperor by the king of Han. Shou Ye, I dare not be the emperor." After three concessions, he had to resign himself to it. For the speaker, the rational mind is superior to the impulsive mind.As long as you can show decisive courage and express your inner feelings properly in an emergency, you will be welcomed by the audience, which is very beneficial for public speaking. 3. Dominant The dominant type refers to that the speaker occupies a high position in the process of public speech by virtue of his superior conditions in terms of position and ability.For example, you are a leader, expert, professor, or celebrity, and the audience is just ordinary people; or you are a representative of a big country or a powerful group, while the other party represents a small country or a weak organization. When such people speak in public, they often make some unusually high-profile remarks, either intentionally or unintentionally.If it is intentional, he will set himself high and look like no one else; if it is unintentional, but because of his special status, he will also generate a kind of pressure from top to bottom in the ears of the listener.In one-way communication, the listener has no way to reason with him, so he has to let you talk.If it is a two-way conversation, although the other party has the responsibility to answer, they will appear cautious.To a certain extent, it will affect the effect of communication between the two parties. There are two different manifestations of high-ranking people: one is self-important, conceited and stubborn, and you listen to what I say.The other is perfunctory, indifferent, you can listen or not. Shen Jianhong recorded such an incident in his "Eight Years of Envoy to the United States": When Shen was serving as Chiang Kai-shek's English secretary and translator, Chiang once hosted a banquet for visiting foreign guests, and invited Dong Xianguang, an English teacher in middle school, to accompany him.During the dinner, the foreign guests asked Jiang if he had ever learned English. Jiang said: "I have, but the teacher is not good, so I didn't learn much." The foreign guests asked: "Who is your teacher?" Dong Xianguang said: "This is my teacher." Dong Xianguang was extremely embarrassed, and he looked restless throughout the banquet, as if he was sitting on pins and needles.Based on his high position, Chiang Kai-shek was domineering and completely disregarded the traditional Chinese virtue of respecting teachers. This is a typical manifestation of the dominant type. For the speaker, the dominant psychological type is undesirable. If you don’t put yourself in an equal position with the audience, or improve your personal quality and self-cultivation, it will do a lot of harm but not any benefit. 4. Comprehensive This is a comprehensive mental state with no senseless impulse, no intentional restraint, a high position without arrogance, and a low position without inferiority.His words are neither humble nor overbearing, and impartial, which makes people listen to the spring breeze and drink the rain. People with this mental state are bound to be welcomed by the audience when they speak in public.Even if on a certain occasion, a certain time will make people unhappy and temporarily affect the communication effect, but after a long time, most of the unhappy people will wake up, and they will naturally think that this kind of person is better. Academician Jiang Xinsong, the director of the Shenyang Institute of Automation of the Chinese Academy of Sciences and the "father of Chinese robots", who dedicated himself to the cause of science in our country, is a typical example of this mental state.After his death, reporters from "People's Daily" and "China Science Daily" made such reports: As a superior, he will treat you as an equal and cooperate with you in a friendly manner.His old colleague said: "Xin Song's style is democratic and never arbitrary. When you have different opinions and disputes, you can even slap the table and throw hats with him. At this time, outsiders can't figure out who is the leader; but afterwards, he never holds grudges. Others. If you insist on your correct opinion, he will appreciate your persistence." As a subordinate, he dared to tell the truth and dare to act.An "863" project needs to be adjusted, but the leading comrades are hesitant.Jiang Xinsong criticized at the meeting: "On this issue, you, Director Zhu, should be responsible." Professor Zhu Lilan, who was then the executive deputy director of the State Science and Technology Commission, still sighed very much when talking about this matter today: "Jiang Xinsong is a handsome science and technology. I also argue. I think he is very charismatic and candid. To a certain extent, he helped me make up my mind. I am very grateful to him. I think every time I talk to him is very enlightening. Come to a conclusion." Jiang Zemin, former general secretary of the CPC Central Committee and former president of the Republic, has set a good example for us in this regard.Although he is respectful, he has no condescending posture when interacting with others, and his words are very approachable. On December 25, 1991, when Jiang Zemin inspected the Guizhou Institute for Nationalities, he kindly asked a Miao female student where she was from.After the female student answered him, he kindly told the female student: "I am from Yangzhou. Have you been to Yangzhou?" The female student replied no.He smiled and said: "Ah, if you have a chance, please visit my hometown Yangzhou. March is the best month. Didn't Li Bai say, 'Fireworks go to Yangzhou in March'?"When speaking in public, we should strive to maintain this peaceful state of mind, and we should also strive to cultivate this state of mind when speaking in peacetime, so as to achieve the best speech effect. In the process of a person's growth, inferiority complex always exists in varying degrees.The famous Austrian psychologist Adler believes that inferiority complex originates from the feelings of distrust, lack of self-confidence, timidity and pain caused by incompetence in childhood.From the perspective of general psychology, inferiority complex generally refers to the individual's contempt for himself due to some physical or psychological defects and other reasons (such as poor intelligence, memory, judgment, temperament, personality, skills, etc.) A certain aspect or several aspects are not as good as others' psychology.Inferiority complex tends to make people lonely, alienated, inhibit self-confidence and sense of honor.When a person's certain ability deficiency is despised, ridiculed or insulted by people around him, this inferiority complex is often greatly strengthened, and even manifested in deformed forms such as jealousy, rage, and self-deception. Regulating and overcoming feelings of inferiority starts with developing self-awareness.That is to form self-awareness through direct and indirect self-awareness, and then to study one's own psychological and physical characteristics; or to form self-awareness through self-monitoring and self-education. The second is self-reinforcing, that is, controlling one's own behavior through the results of one's own behavior. The ancient Greek orator Demosthenes had a stuttering problem since he was a child, and his posture was not good when he spoke. He always had one shoulder high and the other shoulder low, and he always shrugged.In ancient Greece, which advocated eloquence, it was very difficult for him to become an outstanding speaker with his natural conditions.So he was very distressed and had a strong sense of inferiority in his heart.However, he was not discouraged and was not overwhelmed by inferiority complex.On the contrary, he trained hard with extraordinary perseverance and hard-working spirit, and stood by the sea every morning to practice speech with stones in his mouth.At home, hang two sharp swords over your shoulders, and practice speaking in front of a mirror to avoid shaking your shoulders.After several years of hard work and hard work, Demosthenes finally developed a good eloquence, ranking first among the "Top Ten Speakers" in ancient Greece. Finally, self-suggestion and self-motivation must be carried out, that is, constantly remind yourself not to feel inferior, to believe in yourself, and not to be inferior to others.Even if you are in a disadvantaged position, you must encourage yourself to enhance your self-confidence. Everyone has a sense of shyness. In some social situations, it is normal to be "ashamed to speak" for various reasons.However, in social activities, speaking is the main means for people to express their feelings and exchange ideas. If they are "ashamed to speak", it will cause communication barriers. A psychological survey in the United States shows that when getting along with strangers at a banquet, three-quarters of adults feel embarrassed. As for some speech occasions, speech failures caused by shyness are common.Therefore, we cannot let it develop just because the feeling of shyness when speaking is a normal psychological phenomenon. Therefore, only by overcoming the psychological barrier of shyness in conversation, can speaking be relaxed and natural, and achieve the desired effect.To this end, we must first improve our understanding, overcome "ignorance", be diligent in speaking training and practice, constantly sum up experience, and maintain psychological balance; secondly, we must carry out self-suggestion and constantly encourage ourselves to enhance self-confidence.Also, be well prepared.Lincoln said: "Even a man of strength cannot make a systematic and well-organized speech if he lacks thorough preparation." There was a novice British speaker who was going to speak to a group of well-educated audiences. Although he had made full preparations, he was still worried, so he asked Mr. Faraday, a famous British speaker, what the audience already knew.Faraday replied bluntly: "They don't know anything!" People like to express themselves. In a sense, speaking activities are also a kind of self-expression.A speaker often needs to have a certain sense of self-expression, because the desire to express properly can stimulate the speaker's self-confidence and self-motivation, and become the internal driving force for the speaker to emerge and strive for self-improvement.However, if the desire for performance is too strong, beyond the limit of one's actual ability and public acceptance, it will turn the noble speech activity into pure self-expression. Such a speaker will appear eager to try before the speech, eager to win the applause and praise of the audience Bravo, expect a lot from yourself.If the speech is successful and the applause is won, he will get carried away, carried away, and have a great sense of pride of "I am the only one in the world". And if his vanity is not satisfied, he will become frustrated, angry, or self-deprecating, pessimistic, and become a discouraged ball. It can be seen that an excessively strong desire to express is a very harmful psychological obstacle, and to overcome this obstacle, we mainly have to start from the following three aspects. Correct the motivation of the speech and clarify the purpose of speaking; Treat honor and success correctly, don't be eager for quick success, and don't have excessive expectations for honor; Evaluate yourself correctly, don't overestimate yourself, don't slap your face like a fat man, do everything possible to express yourself in front of everyone, that will make people look down on you. Fear and stage fright are very common when speaking in public. An American psychologist once conducted an interesting test titled: "What are you most afraid of?" The result of the test turned out to be that "death" ranked second, while "public speaking" ranked first.With 41% of people terrified of speaking in public more than doing other things, it can be seen that public speaking is a scary thing for most people. A graduate student who was about to graduate was on the podium for the first time as a trainee teacher. When the students stood up and the teachers and students greeted each other, he didn't know where his opening remarks went.In a panic, he said in a trembling voice: "Students, goodbye!"He tried his best to calm down the scene, but what he got in exchange was not composure, but beads of sweat on his forehead.When he subconsciously took out his "handkerchief" to wipe his sweat, the audience roared with laughter again.Why is that?After being hinted by a student, he realized that what he was holding was not a handkerchief, but a sock—huh?Damn it!Probably when I was washing my feet last night, I accidentally put the socks in my pocket.He wanted to avoid the gaze of dozens of pairs of eyes, grabbed the blackboard and wiped the blackboard, and the whole class was in a commotion.He was so embarrassed that he couldn't control himself and felt ashamed, so he ran off the podium, raised his foot in a panic and kicked over the thermos bottle next to the podium... Many politicians and orators have experienced stage fright at first.Take Lincoln as an example. When he first stepped onto the podium, he was so embarrassed that he couldn't even speak a word in fear until he was kicked off the stage.But he did not sink down, but faced the reality bravely, practiced frequently, never let go of every opportunity to speak, and his speech level improved day by day.His presidential inaugural address was later hailed as one of the best inaugural addresses ever given. Another example is the famous Athens orator Diris.When I first stepped onto the podium, despite careful and careful thinking and full preparation, I still suffered a failure.Extreme fear made him incoherent, and no one knew what he was talking about.But he didn't get discouraged and lost confidence. Instead, he worked harder than before to train his courage to speak.He runs to the beach every day, shouts to the sea, and expresses his feelings to the waves; when he returns home, he does vocal exercises in front of the mirror, corrects repeatedly, and perseveres.After several years of hard work, his hard work paid off, and he finally succeeded, known as "the orator of history". So, how to get rid of the psychological barrier of stage fright and have excellent eloquence?You can consider using the following approach. 1. Go all out Anyone is not born to dare to speak freely in public, and there is a difficult "first time".Former US President Roosevelt said: Every novice often has a panic attack.Panic is not timidity, but a kind of excessive mental stimulation.The famous ancient Roman orator Heathrow’s face turned pale and his limbs trembled when he gave his first speech; the American rhetorician Charles Charles kept shaking his knees when he made his debut on the stage; face turned upside down.It can be seen that as long as we have the mentality of fighting to the death and let him go, the whole person will let go. 2. Turn a blind eye Before I speak, I have the audience in my heart, but when I speak, I can't have the audience in my eyes, and I just express myself according to my intention.A teacher gave a good lecture on the stage for the first time. Someone asked him for his experience. He said: "When I was preparing for the lesson, I always thought about the students, but when I got on the stage, all I saw were tables and chairs. In this way, I Relaxed." 3. Strengthen training Strengthening training can be adopted such as reading aloud, talking to yourself, boldly interacting with strangers, talking with close and familiar people, and listening to other people's speeches in public. Here are several methods of anti-stage fright exercises invented by Dr. Dulan, a famous American charm expert, for you to choose and use. (1) Chasing butterflies It works best when done at the last moment before going on stage. ① Stand with your feet shoulder-level, knees slightly bent, back straight, arms relaxed and hanging by your sides. ②You don’t need to deliberately breathe, but do the jumping while shouting “Woo”, a total of 10 times, try to use as much force as possible, the sound of “Woo” should be short, urgent and forceful.Every time I finished saying "Woo", I punched down with both fists. ③Relax and shut up, take a slow and deep breath. ④ Inhale with hiss, open your mouth slightly, bend down to your knees, and squat on the ground.Repeat 3 times and take slow, deep breaths. (2) Steam engine practice ①Stand with your feet shoulder-level, bend your knees, raise your head, shut your mouth, pull your right arm back, and stretch your left arm forward, try your best while taking a deep breath. ② Change the direction of the left and right arms and repeat the above action.The rhythm should be steady. ③ Start slowly, then get faster and faster, and continue to do it for 3 to 5 minutes.Remember to keep your mouth shut. (3) Wood chopping exercise ① Separate your legs by 30-45 cm, point your toes forward, straighten your knees easily, and hold your hands tightly. ②Inhale, swing your clenched hands, and lift your head high. ③Put down the raised hand, bend forward suddenly, and exhale.Kneel again and yell "ha". ④ Inhale, then raise your hand. ⑤ Repeat the above action for 10 to 20 times. Note: keep your mouth closed when you inhale until you say "ha" when you wave your hands, so that you can inhale more oxygen and the practice will be more effective. (4) Swing back and forth to practice ① Stand with your legs apart (shoulder level), while swinging your body, neck and head, first to the right and then to the left. ②Let your arms swing freely, turn around with your body, and finally wrap your arms around your shoulders in a relaxed manner. ③ While swinging, say as loud as you can: "I don't care!" ④Repeated in this way, it can also be called "No, I don't care!" or "What are you doing to me?" Repeated dozens of times. When the body swings, make sure that the head turns with the body. Do it with as much ease and comfort as possible. (5) Decompression exercises ①Standing on the threshold, squeezing the door frames on both sides with your palms, blowing your breath hard, blood will surge up on your face, head, and neck.Hold on for as long as possible. ②Suddenly relax completely. ③Take a deep breath. ④Repeat 3 times. (6) Practice with the world in mind ① Inhale, feel as if you are expanding, open your arms, and embrace the whole world.Stretch your limbs and feel your heart as the world expand and unfold.You are no longer a mere living being. ②Persist for at least 1 minute, put the world in your arms, put your hands on your chest, and press your hands lightly. ③Do this 4 times to remove all negative thoughts.Try to like it, accommodate it, take it to heart, and turn hate into love. There are two situations of cold silence: one is in one-way communication, the listener has no interest and distracts attention; the other is in two-way communication, the listener does not respond, or only "um", "oh" and so on. The root cause of the silence is that the speaker's words are not attractive.The listener plays a "receiving" role only out of discipline or politeness.Therefore, the silence is entirely the speaker's responsibility. The appearance of a cold room is the failure of the speaker, because it cannot achieve the purpose of communicating with each other.If the speaker wants to speak, he must implement control to avoid the occurrence of cold spots.The method of control is: 1. Keep your speech short The shorter the better for the occasional speech in one-way communication.For example, the opening ceremony of Huada Shopping Center was held, and people from all walks of life in the city were invited to participate.The general manager only said two words: "Ladies and gentlemen: I warmly welcome you to come! Now I announce: Huada shopping mall is officially opened!" In two-way communication, neither party should reserve the room endlessly, but consciously leave time and opportunity for the other party to speak.After you have finished speaking in one round, you should wait for the other party to respond before speaking, and don't speak very long in one round. 2. Change the subject When speaking in public, encountering silence can attract the audience's attention by temporarily changing the subject.After the goal is achieved, it is still necessary to return to the track of the original topic.For example, if the teacher finds that the students are distracted, looking around, dozing off, whispering, or scribbling on the table during the lecture, the teacher can suspend the lecture and intersperse a few words that are appropriate to the occasion, fashionable, and witty; or briefly talk about something related to teaching. Anecdotes and anecdotes, the energy of the students will be concentrated at once.After that, continue teaching. The topic change of two-way communication is uncertain, and it can be carried out at any time according to the situation on the spot.For example, you are talking to someone about the TV live broadcast of the World Cup football match that you watched in the early morning, but they don’t like football, and they didn’t get up to watch it in the middle of the night.At this time, you should change the subject in time. 3. Stop talking No speaker wants to be left alone.When this situation occurs, you have adopted control measures such as compressing the speech, changing the topic, strengthening the tone, etc., but still cannot reverse the cold situation, then the conversation should be stopped.Prolonged silence is cruel and time-wasting for both sides of the exchange.For example, after you talk about football with him and he is not interested, if you change the topic and he is still not interested, you can't continue the conversation.This is called "more than half a sentence without speculation". In addition, there is another kind of situation, which is disrupting the scene, which is to maliciously disrupt the order of the scene, so that the speakers are constantly interrupted, or even forced to terminate.This situation occurs mainly in one-way communication.For example, in classes, reports, conference speeches, speeches, etc., the audience holds small meetings, shifts seats, enters and exits at will, makes noise, laughs, booes, whistles, and applauds blindly. There are three reasons for disturbing the scene: one is that the listeners already have prejudices against the speaker and are the opposition.The reason why he came to listen was to take advantage of the loopholes and make trouble. No matter what you said, he would disturb you.The second is that the speaker's ideological, academic, and business level is not high, and the listener feels that the words are meaningless, and it is a waste of time to listen.The third is that the listener is not interested in the content of the speech. As a spokesperson, you can only control the agitation by yourself.It is not the ultimate solution to the problem to rely on others who have a stake in the listener to intervene, suppress, or exit in anger.In doing so, the negative effects may be even worse.Therefore, the speaker must face up to the disruption and take the initiative to exercise control. The method of controlling the disturbance needs to distinguish between different causes. The spoiler for the first reason: firm confidence and turn a deaf ear. In February 1860, Lincoln ran for President of the United States for the first time and gave a speech at the Key Society of New York.By the time he arrived in New York, the local newspapers had published many articles attacking him.When he stepped onto the stage, before he could speak, there was a roar of ridicule from the audience.Not long after the speech started, the audience was already very chaotic, and some Republicans shouted loudly for him to get off the stage.But Lincoln was completely unmoved, and continued speaking very calmly as he had prepared in advance.Gradually, the venue became quiet. Except for Lincoln's voice, there was only the burning sound of gas lamps, and the audience was fascinated by it.The next day, newspapers published articles praising Lincoln's exceptionally successful speeches. Spoiler for the second reason: modesty and prudence, self-blame. In the 1986 Philippine general election, Mrs. Co Aquino, the candidate, was accused of being a housewife who didn't understand anything.She took the stage to deliver a campaign speech, and many people viewed her in this light.The opposition publicly yelled that she was only worthy of being around the pot and asked her to go back to cooking.As soon as she opened her mouth, she said: "I am just a housewife, and I don't know much about politics and economics, and I have no experience." This sincere and sincere truth made the audience quiet for a while.Then she said: "Although I am a layman in politics, as a housewife who revolves around the pot, I am proficient in daily economics!" The audience immediately burst into enthusiastic cheers. A spoiler for the third reason: humorous and lively. According to the propaganda work plan of the main factory, the propaganda director of a certain factory went to a branch factory to publicize current affairs policies.Some workers in the branch factory are worried about being laid off.But at this juncture, I dare not stop listening.When the director of the branch factory spoke about the current affairs policy that the minister wanted to preach, the audience exploded, making a lot of noise.The minister opened his throat and shouted: "I have good news for everyone." The audience suddenly fell silent.The minister deliberately paused for a while before saying: "My wife is resigned!" The audience was stunned for a moment, and then there was a round of warm applause.Then the minister started with how his wife voluntarily asked to be laid off, and vividly described the conversations between the husband and wife and the objections of the children.After the audience's emotions were fully mobilized, they briefly talked about why they were laid off and the current situation of layoffs.Afterwards, everyone said that the minister really knew how to speak. To blame is to reproach and blame.There are two situations: one is to raise questions and objections to what is being discussed.Generally, this is well-intentioned.The other is malicious, intentionally making things difficult, and playing pranks to achieve the purpose of embarrassing and making a fool of the speaker. The methods of controlling blame should also be treated differently: 1. For well-intentioned reproaches, you should do your best to express your views or answer the other party’s questions seriously and responsibly. As long as it does not involve national or organizational secrets or indecent content, all questions should be answered, and diplomatic rhetoric such as "no comment" should not be used.If you really can't answer, you should apologize honestly, or leave words for further discussion. The propaganda minister mentioned above went to the branch factory to explain current affairs policies. A female worker stood up and asked, "You always say that the situation is good, so why are layoffs being laid off everywhere in the country?" The performance just shows that the situation is good. Now some places and departments are overstaffed, and some people have nothing to do; while some places and departments have too much work and no one to do it. Is this normal? A factory has backward technology, outdated equipment, and no market for products. Instead of paying wages, it is better to let some people lay off their jobs and change careers to do what the society needs. In this way, the needs of the society are met, and everyone has money to earn, isn’t it better than hanging to death?” 2. The accusation of malice should be tit for tat, resolutely and decisively refute or expose The tactics can be diversified: or sarcasm, or tit for tat, or humorous.In short, its attempts cannot be allowed to succeed.在这种情况下，不予理睬、拒绝回答，或者发火、生气，或者令其离开或自己离开，都是不恰当的：一是会助长其气焰；二是混淆其他听众的视听；三是有损自己的形象。 美国前总统布什在一次演说时，台下递上一张纸条，他打开一看，写的是“傻瓜”。他若无其事地笑道：以往别人递纸条都是提出问题，而不落姓名；而这位只落了姓名却没有提问题。巧妙地将本想辱骂他的恶语，转移到辱骂者身上。 有人曾作过调查，想搞清楚人们进行口才训练的原因和内心愿望是什么，调查的结果惊人的一致。大多数人的中心愿望与基本需要是一样的，他们是这样回答的：“当人们要我站起来讲话时，我觉得很不自在，很害怕，使我不能清晰地思考，不能集中精力，不知道自己要说的是什么。所以我的最大愿望就是可以在公众面前自信、泰然地发表自己的观点，且逻辑清晰，内涵丰富，让人折服。” 有强烈自信心的人，一般来说是能言善辩的人；能言善辩的人，一般来说又都具有强烈的自信心。 自信可以促进说话能力的提高；说话能力的提高又可以进一步增强自信，两者是互相作用的。 自信，是提高说话能力的推动力，是事业成功最重要的力量；说话是自信能力的外在表现，是提高自信最有效的方法之一。 林肯说：“不论人们如何仇视我，只要他们肯给我一个略说几句的机会，我就可以把他们说服。”这是何等自信！ 我们不妨从别人的经验开始我们的信心训练。 卡耐基是一位享誉全球的当众讲话训练大师，在他的一生中所收到的感谢信堆积如山。他的学生各行各业、三教九流都有。所有这些人都感到需要自信，需要有在公开场合中表达自己的能力，好让别人接纳自己的意见。他们在达到目的之后，就满怀感激地给卡耐基写信，以表示谢意。 看一看成功的范例，或许可以让我们从感性上认识到获得出色的当众讲话能力并非什么很难的事情，他们的经验可以让我们“从战略上藐视敌人”！ 有一位叫彼得森的医生，是位热心的棒球迷，经常去看球员们练球。不久，他就和球员成为好朋友，并被邀请参加一次为球队举行的宴会。 在侍者送上咖啡与糖果之后，有几位著名的宾客被请上台“说几句话”。突然之间，在事先没有通知的情况下，宴会主持人突然宣布说：“今晚有一位医学界的朋友在座，我特别请彼得森大夫上来向我们谈谈棒球队员的健康问题。” 作为一位已从医30余年，有丰富卫生保健知识的人，按说对这类问题是小菜一碟。他可以坐在椅子里向坐在两旁的人侃侃谈论这个问题谈一整晚。但是，要他当众，即使面对很少的人讲这个问题，那却是另外一个问题了。这个问题令他不知所措，他心跳加速，而他每一沉思，心脏就立即停止跳动。他一生中从未作过演讲，而他脑海中的记忆，现在全飞到爪哇国去了。 The results of it?宴会上的人全在鼓掌，大家都望着他，他摇摇头，表示谢绝。但他这样做反而引来了更热烈的掌声，纷纷要求他上台演讲。 “彼得森大夫！请讲！请讲！”的呼声愈来愈大，也更坚决。 他心情非常矛盾，他知道，如果他站起来演讲一定会失败，他将无法讲出完整的五六个句子。因此，他站起身来，一句话也没说，转身背对着他的朋友们，默默地走了出去，深感难堪，更觉得是莫大的耻辱。 他不愿再度陷入脸红及哑口无言的困境了，他开始进行当众讲话训练。他有极为迫切的需要。他希望拥有演讲的能力，他锲而不舍地练习自己当众讲话的能力和信心。 通过努力练习，进步简直是一日千里，他紧张的情绪消失了，信心愈来愈强。两个月后，甚至开始接受邀请，前往各地演讲。他现在很喜欢演讲的感觉及那份成就感，以及所获得的荣誉，更喜欢从演讲中结交到更多的朋友。 一次，一个公司的董事长找到卡耐基。他对卡耐基说：我这一生每逢要说话时都很紧张。身为董事长不能不主持开会。董事们个个都已熟悉多年，大家围桌而坐时，我同他们对答如流，一点困难也没有，然而一旦起身说话，我竟然一个字也说不出。这种情形已有多年。我不奢求你的训练有帮助，这个毛病已经根深蒂固了。卡耐基说：你既然认为我帮不上你的忙，干吗还要找我？只为了一个原因，他答道，我有一个下属以前内向腼腆，每次见我都眼观地面，很少说话，但最近每次进办公室时，他都显得神采奕奕，信心十足，头颅高昂，还主动和我打招呼，甚至有一次开会时竟然当众作了10分钟发言，我惊讶于他的变化，后来才知是因为他参加了当众讲话的训练。 卡耐基告诉他，定期来上课，并照课程的要求做，不出几星期，就会喜欢在听众面前讲话了。 这位董事长果然来参加课程，并且进步神速。3个月后，卡耐基邀请他参加阿斯特饭店舞厅里的3000人聚会，并谈谈自己在训练中所获得的收益。为了以自己的故事激励更多的人去除讲话的恐惧，他推掉了自己的其他约会，如约在聚会上发言，卡耐基说让他讲两分钟就行，结果对着3000人，他足足讲了10多分钟。 类似的奇迹还有很多，许多人因此而改变了自己的命运。其中，有好多人在自己的岗位上获得了远远超过自己所希望的擢升，在商业上、事业上和社会上达于显赫的地位。也正因为如此，我们可以肯定地说，在正确的时刻，一场演说就足以使大功告成。因为在这样一场演说中，人们可以以别人的经验为梯，摘取当众讲话的信心、勇气和技巧。 要想获得自信心、勇气以及能力，以便在向人们发表谈话的同时能够冷静而清晰地思考，这并不像大多数人所想象的那般困难。就像你完美地完成其他事业一样，任何人只要对它充满火山熔岩般的热情，并肆意释放出其潜在的能力，就一定能成功。 你一定要具有果敢的决心，并把这种决心转化为一个单词，一段讲话，一步行动，倾尽全身心地训练培养。 有位商界的传奇人物，在大学时代，他初次起立讲话时，老师指定的五分钟讲演，他讲不到一分钟，便脸色发白，匆匆下台。 但他坚强地承受了那次失败。他立下决心要做个优秀的演说家，片刻不懈，最后终于成为政府的经济顾问，令人瞩目，他就是蓝道尔。谈到当众讲话时他说：“我的讲演排得满满的，现身的场合有厂商协会的午、晚餐会，还有商务部、扶轮社、基金筹募会、校友会等。我曾经在密歇根州的艾斯肯那巴发表爱国演说，于慷慨激昂中投身一次世界大战；我曾与米基·龙尼下乡做慈善讲演；与哈佛大学校长柯南和芝加哥大学校长胡钦斯下乡宣导教育；我甚至曾以极蹩脚的法语做过一场餐后演说。 “我想我了解听众要听的是什么，以及他们希望它被怎样地讲出来，对于堪当事业重任的人而言，这其中的窍门是：只要他愿意去学，没有什么学不会的。” 蓝道尔的经历说明，在努力成为有效的说话者的过程中，坚强的意志是成败的关键所在。坚强的意志和明朗的思想决定了在当众讲话技巧上的进步会有多快。因此，要想成功，必须具备的条件就是：用毅力来磨平高山，并且相信自己一定会成功。 无论何时何地都不会有天生的演讲家。历史上有些时期，当众讲话是一门精致的艺术，必须谨遵修辞法与优雅的演说方法，因而，要想做个优秀的大众演说家那是极其困难的，是经过漫长的学习才能达到的。现在我们却把当众演说看成一种扩大的交谈。以前那种说话、动作俱佳的方式，如雷贯耳的声音已经永远过去。我们需要的是言简意赅，常人可以理解的真挚的思想和话语，而非华丽的辞藻、严谨的修辞和泛泛而谈。 当众讲话不是一门闭锁的艺术，并不像在学校那样容易学到知识，必须经过多年的美化声音，以及苦学修辞学，多年以后才能成功。平常说话简单易学，只要遵循一些简单的原则就行。对于这一点，口才大师卡耐基的经验可以证明。1914年，他在纽约市青年基督协会开始教授学生时，讲授那些低年级的方法，同他在给大学新生演讲的方式大同小异。但是他很快发现，把商界中的大人当成大学新生来教是一种很大的失误。因为学生们所需要的并不是这些，而是在面对听众时有足够的勇气直起腰来，做一番明确、连贯的报告。于是他抛弃教条，用一些简单的概念和那些学生互相交流和切磋，直到他们的报告辞达意尽、深得人心为止。事实证明，这一方法可以让学生在轻松的气氛中学到他们所需要的东西。 可见，当众讲话并非是古代那样精致的艺术，这是必须认识到的一点。在训练的过程中，要保持轻松与乐观的心态，这种心态将引领你体会到训练的快乐，并最终走向成功。