Chapter 17 first quarter

Yuuki stood there blankly with her back to the sparkling sea.The sea water flowed down from his body and dripped on the beach.Looking at the green mountains in front of you, listen carefully.It was as if someone was calling her.However, apart from the tide behind him and the panting of the two teenagers beside him, he couldn't hear anything. When her eyes fell on the clothes she had taken off, she realized that she was naked.She felt ashamed, remorseful, and hated by herself.She kicked the sand hard under her feet and ran forward. The sea water flowing from the short hair ran into the eyes, which hurt the eyes very much.Raised his left hand and wiped it.The bandage on the left wrist was unraveled, it was loose and uncomfortable, Yuuki tore off the bandage and threw it on the ground.

"Where are you going?" "Your bandages..." The two teenagers behind him yelled loudly. Without looking back, Yuki picked up the underwear on the ground, put it on on the spot, then picked up the clothes scattered on the beach, hugged her in her arms and ran towards the pine forest.Yuxi left the spirea again and walked down the embankment, the poor little white flower was knocked off a lot by her again.In the shade of the wall in the backyard of the hospital, Yuki tried to put on clothes, but her body was wet, and there were still many spirea petals stuck to her body.

She walked to a place where the sun could shine, intending to dry her body before wearing it.Under the sunlight, the small white petals on the body are like shiny decorations. "Yuki!" Someone called her.Looking up, it was Shiho and two nurses in white nurse uniforms running out from the back door.Yuuki hurriedly got dressed, waiting to be scolded. Shiho came over, looked at Yuki's wet hair, stared at her sternly, and said hoarsely, "You are really worry-free!" The nurses looked at Yuuki with eyes that estimated her mental state: "Did you go to the sea?" Before Yuki could answer, Yusaku who had just come out of the back door immediately asked, "Have you been there?"

Yuki never answered, and with the support of two nurses, she followed her parents and walked towards the back door of the hospital. Before entering the back door of the hospital, Yuuki glanced back. On the embankment full of spirea, two teenagers were looking towards this side.The nurse made Yuuki take a shower, and changed into a white hospital gown that looked like pajamas.First, the wrist was bandaged in the surgery, and after confirming that there was no other trauma, she was taken to the psychiatric department. A doctor named Dohashi sat across from Yuuki.Thirty-seven or eighteen years old, thin and thin, but he does not give the impression of being weak at all. He must be a strong-willed person.With a long face, silver-rimmed glasses, and a gentle smile, Yuki reminded him of wild goats on the plateau.

Dohashi asked Yuuki what he was doing in the sea.Not only did Yuki not answer this question, he didn't even answer questions about his name and age. "You want to swim, right? But, it's still cold." Tuqiao was not impatient at all, "Do you know why you came here? Do you know what this place is? You agreed to come here Is it?" Three months ago, Yuki refused to eat, refused to go to school, and it became quite serious.Yuki objected to Shiho's offer to take her to a local psychiatric clinic, but Satoshi insisted, and Yuuki reluctantly agreed to receive weekly counseling. An old doctor in his 70s often said: "Just say anything and let me hear it."

Once, the old doctor saw her tightly closed lips, stroked her head affectionately and asked, "What's wrong?" Yuki felt uncomfortable as if the place where she was touched was rotten.She spat in the old doctor's face, kicked the nurse who scolded her in the calf, and ran out of the clinic. Yuuki walked aimlessly, and came to the bustling city center at night.A group of drunks saw Yuuki and groaned "the little ass is so cute" and groped her ass.A drunk even hugged her.Unable to resist, Yuki bit her bandaged left wrist.Yuuki felt nauseous and vomited all over the drunk.The group of drunks were scared away.To prevent further trouble, Yuuki smeared vomit all over her body.Later, Yuuki is found by patrolling police and sent home.

Yuxi is sent to the Children's Psychological Counseling Center.When the doctor at the assistance center was changing her bandage, Yuki suddenly grabbed the scissors from the doctor's hand and stabbed her injured wrist hard.Everyone agrees that Yuuki should be hospitalized.The old doctor of the psychiatric clinic recommended Shuanghai Children's Hospital.A week ago, my parents made a special trip to visit the hospital and have already introduced Yuxi's condition to the doctor. Dr. Dohashi continued: "Aren't you a bit confused when you come here? Your home is on the Seto Inland Sea, and you may find it a bit unbelievable to come here so far?" He moved slightly towards Yuki Moved, "Now I will tell you in detail, what do you hate most when others hide things from you, don't you? Mr. Tsunoda, who treats you, is a college classmate with the director of this hospital. He thinks you are in good condition. You will be fine after staying in the hospital for a while. Your parents saw the situation in the hospital and were very satisfied, so they brought you here. There is still a vacant bed in the female ward, and we will consider accepting you. However, whether you are hospitalized or not, you are still Depends on the diagnosis. That's probably how it's going to be."

Yuuki didn't speak. "The so-called diagnosis result is actually to listen to your own wishes. In other words, do you really want to be hospitalized here to cure your illness?" Yuuki still didn't speak. Doqiao continued to say patiently: "How is it? Do you want to live? No matter how much your parents want you to be hospitalized, if you don't want to live in the hospital, it won't work. What do you want to do? Tell me what you think, okay?" it is good?" Yuuki doesn't have any hope for the hospital at all.She felt that the kind doctor in front of her was hypocritical, and she also hated the smell of Lysol in the hospital.She didn't want to be hospitalized, but she didn't want to go home either.While thinking about it, I suddenly felt something shaking in the distance.

Through the window of the consulting room, you can see that the trees in the yard are covered with bell-like yellow flowers. The flowers are very small, like countless bows tied on the branches.On the hill outside the hospital, there are distinct layers from light yellow to dark green. In the bushes above, small white flowers sway in the wind, which looks so pitiful.Yuxi's home is close to the city center, and the surrounding concrete buildings are artificially colored. The scenery here makes her feel fresh. Dohashi followed Yuxi's line of sight and looked back, pointed to the little yellow flower outside the window and said, "Ah, that's gorse. The gold of gold, the bird of a sparrow. From a close look, it looks like a little sparrow spreading its wings and about to fly. look."

"Where are the white flowers on the mountain?" Yuxi couldn't help asking, and immediately regretted it after asking. Dohashi pretended not to notice Yuuki's regret, and continued: "Ah, it's probably Tangli, which is similar to apples. The red fruit that bears in autumn is like a cherry, and I have never eaten it. But I have eaten raspberries. You can go a little further into the mountains." Tuqiao turned around and continued, "The children in the hospital often climb mountains together. Look, climbing is difficult, right? Have you ever climbed a mountain? It is not easy to climb a small mountain. Yeah. But once you get there, you get a sense of accomplishment, a mental and physical workout, and a collaborative spirit..."

Tuqiao turned out of the window again and pointed with his finger: "Out of the gate of the hospital, turn to the direction of the national highway. After passing the highway, it is a road dedicated to mountain climbing. The slope is not big at first, and then it becomes steeper. It is not easy to climb up. After a while, it is the top of the mountain that we call Myojin Mountain. Although it is only more than 600 meters high, you can see the Seto Inland Sea to the north, and the mountains of the Shikoku area to the south. Peak. Reibo is the highest peak in western Japan, and we climb it twice a year." "Lingfeng...?" This term caught Yuxi's attention. Dohashi looked at Yuxi and said, "It's the sacred mountain." "Kamiyama..." Yuuki looked into Dohashi's eyes, temporarily forgetting her shame and irritability. "Do you know what mountain belief is?" Tuqiao chose the right words and said, "Some mountains are places where gods descend, and some mountains themselves contain the will of gods, and they can all be objects of people's beliefs." "God came...why?" Yuuki didn't understand. Dohashi tilted his head and thought for a while: "I'm afraid it is to save mankind. Many people want to seek God's salvation so that they can live happily in this world, and they also want to live happily in the afterlife, which is the world after death. They all go to the place where the god descended to climb the mountain. Even those stooped old women risked their lives to climb that steep cliff." "Can you be saved?" "what……" "Mountain climbing, didn't you say that you climb twice a year?" "Ah, I have climbed many times. As for whether I have been saved..." There was a wry smile on Tuqiao's face, "The afterlife is the world after death, and you can only know it after you die. I believe that God will come, probably because I have no desire here, so God didn’t pay attention to me. However, I have taken my children to climb mountains so many times without any accident, maybe God is really protecting us. God We don’t care whether it exists or not, but after climbing the mountain, I feel very good, that’s for sure. Every time I climb the mountain, I have a new feeling. I sweat profusely, climb to the top of the mountain and stand there, oh, the whole body Bathed in a wind that is completely different from the world below, it really feels like a rebirth." "Rebirth?" "Because I grew up in Tokyo, I was born to like nature, so I probably have this feeling." "Can I climb too?" "you?" "If I stay in the hospital, can I go mountain climbing?" "...Do you want to climb a mountain?" Yuuki didn't answer. Dohashi looked at Yuxi with observation eyes: "That mountain is too difficult to climb, not all the children in the hospital can climb it. It must be those children who have recovered physically and mentally and are about to be discharged from the hospital. And usually I am used to mountain-climbing therapy, I am willing, and my parents agree, so I can climb that mountain. Twice a year, once in mid-August, and once in early April, is also to welcome the new semester or new school year." Yuuki closed her eyes, imagining the appearance of the sacred mountain that she had never seen before.The holy mountain inserted into the sky, the strong wind, she stood on the top of the mountain, the auspicious light fell from the sky, she got a new life... Dohashi's voice interrupted Yuxi's daydream: "Climb the Myojin Mountain opposite, and you can participate immediately after you are hospitalized. As long as you have the confidence to solve the problem, I believe you have this confidence. Climbing the mountain is said to be a kind of therapy, but in fact It's not a difficult thing. While climbing the mountain, you can watch trees, flowers, birds, and catch bugs. By the way, it's the season for bitter strawberries to bloom. They are said to be bitter strawberries, but they are not bitter at all. , it’s so sweet. It’s about to bear strawberry fruit, crush the strawberry fruit, the smell is very good.” Yuki was infected by Dohashi's words, and couldn't help closing his eyes to find the scent.However, what Yuki smelled was not the scent of strawberries, but the salty smell of the sea tide.The sacred mountain in front of me disappeared, and the sea of ​​clouds turned into a sea of ​​blue waves. Cross-like waves shone, and the sound of the tide beat the eardrums. Between the crests and valleys of the waves, the faces of two teenagers emerged.In order to save her, the teenagers stretched out their hands to her... No, the teenagers are asking her for help... What's going on?Who the hell are they... "What's wrong with you? Does it matter?" Tuqiao asked worriedly. Yuuki opened her eyes, sighed and said, "Live here...I want to live here." Dohashi asked in surprise, "You mean hospitalization?" Yuki nodded. Dohashi's eyes narrowed behind his glasses: "That's good. However, your parents are worried that you will go to the sea. This place is so close to the sea, and we can't lock you up. If you are hospitalized, your parents won't let you go." Don't worry, neither do we." "……It doesn't matter." "What's all right?" "...I will never go again." "Are you never going to sea again?" Yuki nodded. "Why did you go into the sea just now, can you tell me?" Yuuki didn't answer. "But, in the future, you can't go into the sea without permission, okay?" Yuuki nodded vigorously. "Then make a promise in front of your parents." Dohashi said and called Yuuki's parents over. Shiho and Yusaku sat next to Yuuki with unease. Dohashi smiled kindly and said, "Yuki wants to be hospitalized, she is confident to solve her own problems." Yusaku expressed doubts: "But, what if we still go to the sea in the future?" Shiho also nodded to express that she was also worried about this issue. Dohashi said to Yuki: "Then make a promise to us. Don't go to the sea casually, and get hospital treatment." Yuuki nodded to Dohashi. "Just nodding your head won't reassure your parents, can you say it yourself?" "... I will never go into the sea again." Yuuki said clearly. Yuxi's family of three followed a young nurse out of the consulting room and came to an L-shaped ward building.On the way to the sea, Yuki had seen this ward building. Compared with other ward buildings, it gave off a dark feeling. "Hisaka Yuki, you will be living in this ward from today on." The nurse pointed to the horoscope on the upper floor of the ward, "Ward No. 8. When the radio in the hospital said students in No. what about you." This is a two-story building.White concrete pillars, brown walls, if not L-shaped, no one would suspect that this is not a small school.More than half of the windows on the first floor were drawn with ivory curtains, and there seemed to be no one inside.Although there are balconies on the second floor, they are all sealed with blue nets. Yusaku asked: "Last time I didn't pay attention, why are the balconies covered with nets?" The nurse said to Yushinu, "I'll explain to you later." Obviously, it's inconvenient to explain in front of Yushi. The nurse opened the glass door. As soon as you enter the door, there is a tiled floor, with evergreen trees on the right and shoe boxes on the left.The nurse told Yuuki the number of the special shoe box: "Don't get the shoe box wrong, don't put your own shoes in someone else's shoe box." Yuki changed into the slippers that Shiho had prepared for her, which were a pair of pink slippers without any decoration.Shiho and Yusaku put on the brown slippers specially prepared for guests in the hospital. The first thing you see when you enter the gate is the nurse's duty room. The counter is lower than that of ordinary hospitals, and you can see the actions of the nurses inside from the outside.There is a corridor in the middle of the ward building, and rooms on both sides. Except for the entrance, outside light cannot enter, and the fluorescent lights on the ceiling are also on during the day.The corridors with plastic floors are clean. "This is the game room." The nurse pointed to the glass door room on the right after entering the gate.In the green carpeted playroom, three children were playing with doctors and nurses.Yuuki was a little surprised that children's voices were rarely heard in the entire ward. The nurse noticed Yuuki's expression: "It's very quiet, right? It's class time now, everyone is going to class." Opposite the game room is the consultation room, and the nurse said to Yuki, "You will receive treatment here from now on." In front of the consultation room is the sick room.The ward is the same as the ward in a general hospital. There is no door, only a curtain.According to the nurse, the first floor is the ward for the girls, and the second floor is the ward for the boys. When they came to the nurse's duty room, the two nurses greeted Yuuki with smiles at the same time: "Hello!" Yuuki remained silent, and Yusaku and Shiho hurriedly greeted the two nurses instead of her. "This is the cafeteria." The nurse who led the way continued to introduce Yuxi, "you have to eat in the cafeteria, you can't take it back to your room. You have to eat in the cafeteria for snacks or something. You can only eat what the hospital prepares for you. The snacks bought by myself must be approved by the doctor before eating. The cafeteria is not just a place to eat, birthday parties, parties, etc. are held here, and TV is also watched here. There is only one TV, which channel to watch It's up to the student union to decide." The nurse turned to Yusaku and Shiho: "When parents come to see their children, they also meet in the cafeteria, so as not to affect the emotions of other children in the same ward." The nurse pointed to the phone at the entrance of the cafeteria and said that the use of the phone is not restricted, but it is not allowed late at night and early in the morning. Be sure to fight, and don't fight for too long.The nurse introduced Yuki and the others to the bathroom, bathroom, bathroom and other facilities, and finally came to Yuki's ward. This is a ward for middle school students, but there is only one vacant bed at the moment, so Yuki has to be arranged here. "You're already in the sixth grade, I think it's okay." The nurse said to Yuki very kindly. As soon as you enter the door, you can see signs with the names of four people hanging on the wall, and a new sign reads: Hisaka Yuki. There is no one in the ward now.Probably went to class.The ward is the same as a general hospital ward, with four beds, four tables, and four chairs.Yuki's bed is the one on the right side of the door.The bed was covered with clean sheets, and there was nothing on the table. On the light green wall above the table, there were a few traces of scotch tape pasted on it. "The drawer is not locked, and the important things are locked in a locked cabinet next to the nurse's duty room, and the key is over there," the nurse said.Yuuki glanced at the other beds.The quilt on the bed next to Yuxi was neatly folded, there was no decoration on the bed, nothing was pasted on the wall, and there were many books and notebooks piled up on the table, most of which had the word "death" in their titles. There are many cute puppets and dolls on the bed opposite this bed, and the table is also full of puppets and dolls. There are several cartoon advertisements on the wall above the table. There are no dolls on the bed opposite Yuxi, and many textbooks are neatly placed on the table, but the walls beside the bed and above the table are covered with pictures, long knives and daggers, sticks and axes, all kinds of pistols, in short Is a picture of the murder weapon or weapon. The nurse said to Yuxi: "This is where you live, keep it clean. Posting posters and photos is basically free, but you have to get permission to post them later. I have told you a lot of rules, maybe you will I find it troublesome, but these rules are also for your own good. If you feel that some rules are really unbearable, don’t hold back in your heart, just tell us.” Then he said to Yusaku and Shiho: "Ten minutes later, I will talk about the work and rest time in detail in the cafeteria." After speaking, he bowed and left. In the quiet ward, Yuuki heard her parents sigh.Yusaku spoke first.He put the travel bag in his hand on the table: "Puppets and dolls are acceptable, but what about the machetes and pistols all over the wall? Can this be allowed? Is this place okay?" Shisui hastily stopped him, "Don't keep saying things like that." Yuki walked to the window.There is no iron railing as imagined, that is, ordinary windows.There is a fresh green outside the window, there are two tall water purification tanks on the right, and the wall is a little farther away. Shiho tried his best to restrain the irritability in his heart, and said to Yuki's back: "Yuki, correct your shortcomings here, don't hurt yourself again, don't lie anymore, listen to the teacher, and you will restore your original self." Yours, did you hear that!" "You don't need to worry about it!" Yuxi looked out of the window without moving, she wanted to shout, wanted to shout, but she didn't have the strength, "You and Congzhi can live a good life, I will live here alone for the rest of my life!" "It's the same trick again! You child..." Zhisui trembled with anger. Yuki covered her ears with her hands, not wanting to listen to her mother's nagging anymore. "What are you going to do?" Shiho said as he walked behind Yuki and took her hand, Yuuki resisted. Yusaku hurried over and inserted between their mother and daughter, protecting Yuki and said to Shiho: "From now on, Yuki will have to live alone, and the child is also worried, why do you force her like this as a mother?" Something happened!" Yusaku turned around and said to Yuuki: "Youki, too, don't give up on yourself. That is to rest here for a few days, and then go home after you are discharged from the hospital. If you recover quickly, you can temporarily leave the hospital and go home next Saturday. Don't force yourself, don't talk if you don't want to talk, just do what you think is appropriate, understand?" Yuuki didn't want to answer at first, but felt that Shiho was staring at him with stern eyes, so he reluctantly nodded. "If you think this ward is not suitable, or if you have any opinions on the rules of the hospital, Dad will negotiate for you." "...Forget it." Yuuki shook her head.She doesn't think it's a big problem whether it's pictures of murder weapons or weapons, or cumbersome rules.All she can think about now is to climb that sacred mountain, and her disgust towards the hospital hasn't changed in the slightest. "So what's the point of negotiating," she thought. "Then let's go to the cafeteria." Yusaku put his hand on Yuuki's back, Yuki obediently walked out of the ward side by side with his father, Shiho followed behind. When I was about to reach the cafeteria, suddenly there was the sound of footsteps from the stairs next to the cafeteria accompanied by the child's cry: "Let go of me! It hurts!" "You skipped school, where did you go? Your clothes got so wet, where did you go? Tell me!" a man said in a low voice.Two teenagers suddenly ran down the stairs in front of Yuki's eyes. After going down the stairs, they ran towards the gate without looking back.Yuuki didn't see their faces clearly.I saw two people with bare upper body, each holding a piece of cloth in his hand. Two teenagers, one short with short hair and the other tall and thin with longer hair.The nurses ran out of the duty room, stopped them, and shouted sharply: "What do you want to do? Go back!" A 30-year-old male nurse in a white coat chased down from the second floor and grabbed the hands of the two teenagers from behind. "Fuck you! Let me go!" The little boy yelled, and the two boys turned around at the same time. Yuuki finally saw their faces clearly.After entering the ward building, Yushi's stagnant heart lake rippled for the first time.The teenagers also saw Yuxi clearly, and at the same time opened their eyes wide and let out an "ah", the voice was almost screaming.The short-haired, short-haired boy nicknamed Giraffe said, "This is impossible..." he was moaning in pain.The long-haired, tall, lanky boy nicknamed Hedgehog said, "Is this true..." as if asking Yuuki, but also as if asking himself.They immediately became obedient and obediently followed the male nurse upstairs. Yuki saw clearly that what they were clutching in their hands was a torn bandage.The adults around did not notice any relationship between the three children. After the two boys went upstairs, Xiong Zuo asked worriedly again, "Is this place okay?" Shiho said coldly: "Stop talking too much!" After speaking, he took Yuki's hand and walked to the cafeteria. Yuuki was both surprised and confused by the sudden appearance of the two boys, which made her temporarily forget her aversion to the hospital and the nervousness when she first arrived at the hospital.

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