Chapter 20 Chapter 4 Disorder

The murderer seems to have disappeared from this earth since the murder in the flower shop. Ren Fei felt as if he had rushed into the barren grassland, as if there was a way everywhere, but he couldn't find a way anywhere. Ren Fei said to Lin Fan: "You know what, I feel tired, I feel like I can't stand it any longer." Lin Fan knew the pressure in Ren Fei's heart, but Lin Fan knew in his heart that even though Ren Fei said so, he still had strength in his heart. The case seems to be stuck in a terrible loop, and the only chance for the police to catch the killer is when he commits another crime.Because the murderer did not leave any key clues every time he committed a crime, the police could only watch the murderer commit the crime, but they were helpless.To some extent, the murderer succeeded, and he wore down the will of the police in committing crimes again and again.

Lin Fan didn't feel tired, he just felt that the strength in his whole body was about to explode. The possible victims found from the "Stubborn Stone" blog information, through their search and investigation, found that the murderer only communicated with these people through emails, and the murderer used different email addresses to contact different people. This time the murderer left two more things, one is a music box and the other is a poem. Ren Fei said: "At first we thought we would know who the next target would be from the murderer's hints, but now why can't we figure it out clearly?"

Lin Fan said: "Actually, it's relatively clear. From the blog of 'Stubborn Stone', we all know that the murderer's target is fourteen people. Judging from the hints left, the two women in the music box imply that 'Wang Xifeng' mother and daughter." Zhang Cheng said: "I agree with Lin Fan's opinion. Now there are a few sisters from the Jia family, Lin and Xue who are left in the Twelve Gold Hairpins. According to my guess, the murderer will take the Jia family's sisters , and Lin and Xue are placed at the end, and now it seems that they are the only two. But I find it strange that the murderer does not have as many hints as he originally gave."

Lin Fan said: "Not only are we observing the murderer, the murderer is also observing us." Ren Fei asked: "You mean, if he finds out that we have found and protected Wang Feng, he will know that we already know how he found these victims?" After investigation, it was found that Wang Feng left her real name on the "Stubborn Stone" blog.She replied in the article "Looking for "Wang Xifeng"" on the blog of "Stubborn Stone": Although I am not born in a rich family like Wang Xifeng in the book, and I am not as capable as her, you can see The article here, I like this character in the book more and more.Some of my friends once said that I look like Wang Xifeng... My daughter is also called "Qiaojie"...

Lin Fan said: "You now know that in this case, we are fighting the murderer not only for investigation and counter-investigation, but also for wits and courage!" At this time, Lin Fan and the others, like the murderer, had only one chance.This opportunity was not the "death sentence" of the murderer, but it was Lin Fan's and the others'. The "May 1st" holiday is coming soon, will the murderer do it at this time? After the case analysis meeting was held, Director Liu called Ren Fei, Lin Fan and Zhang Cheng together. Ren Fei asked Director Liu: "Do you want to tell Wang Feng the whole story this time?"

Zhang Cheng and Lin Fan didn't speak. According to Ren Fei, it's best not to tell her these things. Director Liu saw that neither Lin Fan nor Zhang Cheng expressed their views, so he said, "Don't tell Wang Feng this time. We only have this one chance, and we can't let the murderer run away again!" After hearing this, Ren Fei hurriedly stood up and said, "Ju Liu, I will take full responsibility for this matter!" Director Liu signaled Ren Fei to sit down. He said, "It's not a question of who should be held accountable now. You think it's enough for Ren Fei to take the responsibility. That's two lives!"

Ren Fei lowered his head when he heard this, he has been feeling guilty for this matter, he feels that things should not be like this.Those two young girls should not have died, they should have lived happily, but it was their carelessness that caused irreparable consequences today. At this time, Lin Fan said: "We still have the initiative in our hands, because the murderer still doesn't know that we have already understood that his murder pattern is to find the Twelve Gold Hairpins. So this time we have to be more secretive in protecting Wang Feng, It's also safer. This time is a good chance to catch the murderer."

Ren Fei nodded, and said fiercely: "I will never let him go this time!" Zhang Cheng said: "Now the time of the murderer's crime has changed, and there is no pattern. Judging from the things left by the murderer at the scene of Liu Ruoshi's victimization, he left fewer and fewer hints. It seems that he is also worried that the police will know in advance. his movements." Director Liu said: "No matter what, we must catch him this time." The "May 1st" long holiday passed without incident. On May 8th, Lin Fan came to the police station early in the morning. He came here after receiving a call from Ren Fei.Because the police station received another strange letter, this time the murderer did not hint, but directly wrote a few words on the letter paper: "Nightmare that cannot be stopped!"

The blood used to write the letter was tested to be consistent with the blood of Anonymous on the first letter sent to Director Liu. What do these words represent?At the beginning, the murderer called all this a "game", but now he calls it an "unstoppable nightmare". Ren Fei asked Lin Fan: "Why did the murderer send us such a strange letter and still leave such words on it?" Lin Fan said, "Who knows?" Lin Fan looked at Ren Fei and said, "Maybe all this is a nightmare for the victim, it is for us, and it is also for the murderer." Ren Fei said, "What do you mean?"

Lin Fan said: "Maybe this is another beginning." Lin Fan didn't know why, he could feel the murderer's desperate state of mind from these simple words, and this state of mind cannot be described in words. . Back home at night, Lin Fan found a package in his mailbox.It looked like the package contained a book.Lin Fan opened the outer skin of the kraft paper, but was stunned by what he saw. Inside the package was a notepad with the word "Begin" written in blood-red letters on the yellow skin, which seemed to be written in blood.This made Lin Fan feel that this notebook must be related to this case.

Lin Fan opened the notepad, and saw the first page read: I thought I was an ordinary person living in society, but I am not.It chose me, and I chose it, it was destiny.Because many things have nothing to do with whether you want to or not, it is all doomed. When the doctor told me that I had only one month to live, I didn't feel scared, just went blank.I don't know what other people will think or do when they hear such news, but I just quietly accept this reality.If someone asked me how I plan to spend the next month, I would say I don't know.What else can a dying man do? When I got home, I didn't turn on the light. In this familiar darkness, I suddenly felt an unprecedented fear.I don't know what to be afraid of, I'm just afraid, afraid of everything, maybe I'm more afraid that everything here no longer belongs to me.At that moment I cried, cried like a child!Thinking about it now, I was so ashamed, so worthless.But that's me, that's the real me, unlike the me now, although I'm alive, I don't know why I'm alive, let alone why I'm doing all this. ... Looking at these words, Lin Fan seemed to have entered another world, and there was no Lin Fan in that world... I used to hear people say that when a person seeks something from the gods and Buddhas, he will believe in the gods and Buddhas.I used to not believe in gods and Buddhas, but now I do.I don't know what I want to ask the gods and Buddhas, maybe I want him to give me some peace in these last days, maybe I hope that he can create miracles for me... When I went to Qingyun Temple for the first time, my heart was intoxicated.I didn't know there was such a beautiful place here.The mountains and water there are so beautiful that people forget everything.Thinking about it, I was living desperately for the secular world, it was so boring, I was not as comfortable and happy as a stone or a drop of mountain spring here.After living for forty years, I discovered the psychic connection and nostalgia between people and mountains and rivers. The abbot Juejing in the nunnery told me that the stones of the spiritual pagoda behind the mountain can bring auspiciousness and peace to people.I came to the back mountain and saw the Lingshi there.Human emotions are sometimes very wonderful. When I saw the Lingshi for the first time, I felt a kindness that I had never had before. Holding this Lingshi, I felt that it belonged to me.But thinking about it now, it turns out that it does not belong to me, but I should belong to it, but I didn't know it at the time. I saw her in the nunnery, and for some reason I thought I knew her.Maybe we knew each other in my previous life, maybe...she just passed by in a hurry in front of me, smiling lightly...but I can't forget it.I know she is a nun, but this feeling is not love, not family affection, what is it? At that time, I thought about it for a long time but I didn't understand it. Now that I think about it, the feeling is destined.That encounter doomed my fate, and it also doomed hers.Now I still think of her, her smile, and the bright red blood. If people live by dreams, then I am like this now.But I don’t know if this dream is real or fake. Many times I can’t tell whether I’m living in a dream or in reality. I’m getting more and more unable to control myself, my dreams, or myself life.If I could really choose again, I would rather die peacefully a month later as the doctor said, rather than live like a ghost or a human like I am now... I still remember that day when I came back from Qingyun nunnery, I put that piece of spirit stone gently beside my pillow, as light as letting go of my life.That night I had a dream, in that dream I couldn't distinguish myself, after waking up I still couldn't distinguish myself, and finally I was lost in that dream and couldn't extricate myself.I still don't know whether that dream saved me, or that dream harmed me and others. A month later, I didn't die, I didn't die like the doctor said.After the examination, the doctor told me that my cancer cells disappeared. He said that I was a miracle, an unprecedented miracle.I still remember the inexplicable face of the doctor. He was so curious about me not dying, as if people like me should have died.But I didn't listen to his exclamation, what I was thinking about was that dream, that dream that haunted me for a long time, and I will never forget it until I die. Today I sat by the window and drew, but I sat there for a long time, but I didn't know what to draw.The faceless head looks more and more like myself, I don't know how to draw it.I turned my head and saw me in the mirror.But I feel like that me is no longer me.I can't tell whether the me in the mirror is more real, or the me sitting in front of the drawing board is more real, or the faceless portrait on the drawing paper is more real.Looking at me in the mirror, I cried, and he cried too.I seem to hear him say: "This is all meant to be, you belong to it!" When I got home, I vomited. I didn't eat anything all day today, and I kept vomiting.I don't know why, but my mind is full of her appearance, full of that blood that is so red that it can't be redder, it's so red that it scares me.I don't know where I got the courage to stay in that room for so long.I killed a man, a poor man I didn't know.But the person in the mirror told me that it was not my fault, because not only did I choose her, but she also chose me, this is fate.But I don't believe it, I want to smash the damn mirror, but he is still smiling in the mirror. Once again I'm drawing on a woman's back, I know what I'm going to do, but now I don't know why I'm doing it.When I can paint, my heart is as calm as a lake without waves.I really can't tell now, which one is me, the one who killed someone, the one who was vomiting, the one kneeling beside the spirit stone, or the one sitting here writing a diary.Today Lingshi spoke to me again, it said that this is destiny, this is calling.I told it my pain with tears, but it didn't speak again. When I went upstairs, I was terrified because there was surveillance video there.They will catch me, I'm afraid.But another voice said, don't be afraid, don't be afraid.She saw me coming, she was very happy, her smile was so sweet, it was so sweet that I was intoxicated, I hugged her and cried, this was the first time I cried when I killed someone, I don’t know why I was so sad .Her blood was flowing, and her body was slowly becoming cold...I helped her comb her hair and draw a picture with tears in my eyes.I told her that it would be nice to go to another world, where there are your sisters and your happiness, but what about my happiness?Is that so?No! The police must be looking for me now, I know that, but I'm not afraid.The police must hate me very much now, and I know that, but I am not afraid.Because I need someone to witness what I have done, because I want them to know that I did not do it myself, it is an arrangement, it is fate!But I do it just to let them catch me, I know there's no way I can stop, I want to, but I can't.There is a voice, no, several voices calling me.Looking at him in the mirror, I begged him, I begged him to stop, but he laughed at me.He told me about that dream, my promise in that dream, and what I promised, I must do it. For three years, for three full years, I prepared for that oath for three years.I finally found them, and they finally found me. That night I slept soundly, and that night I dreamed of Lingshi again. It said so many things to me, so many that I couldn't remember a single word.How much I wanted to remember some of what it said, but I didn't. When I came to Qingyun Temple again, nothing seemed to have changed there. I knew they were all waiting for me, and I was also waiting for this moment.I saw her again, and she was still there, quietly, quietly waiting for me.The moment I helped her get dressed, I burst into tears again.I slapped myself desperately, I wanted to get rid of my cowardice. When I got home, I vomited vigorously and spit out blood.But when I looked at myself in the mirror, I smiled and burst into tears. The police don't seem so useless, they seem to have guessed the hint I gave.Around the flower shop, I saw people who looked like policemen, but I didn't feel scared at all, I even thought it was too interesting.I don't have a chance to do it there, but they don't know that I still have my attacker, she is waiting for me now. When I was leaving, I looked back at her, looked at the flowers in this room, the flowers were so fragrant, I told her that she could go happily, there was her dearest person, the person she always wanted to follow , there is a passionate son... The more Lin Fan watched, the more excited he became, he simply threw the notepad away, and grabbed his hair vigorously, "I can't read it anymore, this is his trick!" After a while, Lin Fan still picked up the notepad, and he slowly looked at the anonymous person's diary again, his eyes sparkled with excitement... Lin Fan closed the notepad, and said to himself: " I received your diary, you can't lie to me!"